Chapter 78◇
◎Tolerance, tolerance (Dark humor, proceed with caution)◎
An indescribable sense of crisis, like a chilling blizzard, surged into Huang Que's heart.
The door was tightly closed, but people could be seen coming and going inside, and every now and then many strange and unusual objects were moved in, their purpose unknown.
Two hours later, Huang Que, with a face that looked utterly miserable, asked to see Duan Jingchuan.
Duan Jingchuan smiled slightly, as if he had expected this scene. His lips were already swollen and numb, but he could still speak slowly.
The meeting place was not in the study, but in the front hall, at Huang Que's request.
Duan Jingchuan had no idea what Feng Ran was up to, but he assumed she just wanted to mess with him, so he wasn't angry and went along happily.
He thought Huang Que wanted him to retake the test, but Huang Que made a request: they had to reenact the scene, and he couldn't be interrupted until it was finished.
Duan Jingchuan: My back feels a little cold. Could it be that the charcoal brazier isn't burning brightly enough?
Huang Que was deeply shocked and absent-minded. He walked with his hands and feet moving in unison. He only remembered that the young master could not interrupt what he was about to do, and he couldn't remember anything else.
However, the large group of people following Huang Que couldn't help but give Xiong Qi meaningful glances. Xiong Qi was in the midst of excitement and didn't notice the others' pleas for help, so they turned their attention to Xiu'er.
Xiuer's face turned an unnatural pale. Her lips trembled as she boldly made her request, "Your Highness, I hope that for the sake of the Princess Consort, you won't punish us for our rudeness." She felt completely disoriented, her mind racing with thoughts of what she was about to do. For the sake of her own life, she had no choice but to reveal her status as the Princess Consort, hoping that the Prince's anger might lead him to expose the true nature of the flowers.
Looking around, it seemed that all the servants of Jinghua Courtyard were here. There were probably nearly twenty people standing in the courtyard. This was the first time Duan Jingchuan had ever seen such a neatly arranged group of people.
Some of them had something bulging in their arms, and some even had iron pots, spatulas, sticks, and so on in their hands. If Duan Jingchuan didn't know that Feng Ran wouldn't send someone to beat him up, he would have had a hard time not thinking the wrong thing.
Surprisingly, this display of power didn't make him uncomfortable; instead, it piqued his interest. He raised an eyebrow leisurely and said, "Oh, since it's what the Crown Princess requested, you may do as you please. I guarantee no one will blame you."
Seeing Duan Jingchuan pick up his cup, Xiuer forced herself to add, "Please trouble Your Highness not to drink tea or eat anything later."
Duan Jingchuan's heart began to pound. Could it be that the people in the madam's kitchen were going to make him some kind of terrible dish in front of him and then force him to eat it? The more he thought about it, the more it seemed to make sense. With Feng Ran's abilities, the most unreasonable thing she could do was this.
A slight smile appeared on his lips as he obediently put down his cup. "Well, I won't talk or eat anymore. You can begin."
Xiuer's hands seemed to be afflicted with epilepsy. With a death-defying resolve, she pulled out a piece of white paper with the words "Feng Ran" written in black characters and held it up in front of her.
Huang Que, holding a book, confronted Xiu'er with a conflicted expression.
"Since the master is not here, I will test you on his behalf." When reciting her lines, Xiu'er avoided words that would anger the young master and changed her wording.
Huang Que said, "Please give me a question, elder sister." Then she handed over the book in her hand.
Upon hearing this, Duan Jingchuan knew what the two of them were up to. They were trying to repeat Feng Ran's actions. He was curious to see how Feng Ran would select people to work with such a large group of people.
Duan Jingchuan doesn't possess the magic of time travel, so he can foresee danger; otherwise, he certainly wouldn't have been so eager for it. What happened next was something he would never forget (PS: You can still run now).
Xiuer picked up the book and began to read it. She read it for a long time, so long that Duan Jingchuan wondered if Xiuer had forgotten Feng Ran's reaction.
Xiuer said solemnly, "There's no topic today. Let me tell you a story. Children should learn through play."
...So, the lady couldn't figure out how to test Huang Que, then who are these people? A big question mark appeared on Duan Jingchuan's forehead.
The narrator, Xiuer, began the storyline, saying, "Next up is the New Year's greeting film presented by the Crown Princess to the Marquis's residence. Please enjoy."
As soon as he finished speaking, the crowd in the courtyard dispersed and set up their tools. With a loud "thud," a good show began.
Shaun the Sheep is arguably the most beautiful sheep in the world. Every day, he looks in the mirror, gazing at his thick, white, curly hair like seaweed and smiling foolishly. His big eyes are full of self-love. However, the beautiful sheep has a huge flaw: she cannot make a sound, only able to make a "baa..." sound.
At this point, Xiuer, with a deadpan expression, began to sing, her voice slightly off-key: "Don't underestimate me just because I'm a sheep; I'm as beautiful as a flower, unparalleled in the world."
With a look of grief and indignation, Huang Que put a white cloth that he had torn from somewhere on his head. The messy appearance of the cloth actually resembled the spirit of "Little Sheep". He reluctantly made a "baa..." sound.
Xiuer continued her narration without expression: She thought she was the most beautiful sheep, loved by sheep and pitied by dogs, but she never expected that a wolf would come to the sheep village.
Unlike others who were living a life worse than death, Xiong Qi was eager to try. He cleared his throat, raised his neck high, and howled loudly, "I am a wolf from a foreign land, wandering among the sheep that smell of meat, searching for my fragrance. I approach cautiously, afraid that you will run away and I will go hungry, and all my efforts will be in vain."
"Ah, the wolf is coming!" The chefs and cooks in the kitchen, and the servants cleaning and sweeping in Jinghua Courtyard, all shouted in unison.
Dust swirled on the stone slabs as people pulled out various colored clothes hidden in their bosoms, waving them in their hands and shouting wildly.
"Beat the drums and bang the gongs, pluck the wolf's fur to warm the bed, hey!" Demons danced wildly in the open space of the courtyard.
Feng Ran's lips twitched. This part wasn't working. Her original intention was to perform the Yangko dance, but these people hadn't grasped the essence and now they looked like idiots.
But these people were clearly out of control. Relying on the powerful backing of the Crown Princess, the Crown Prince would certainly not scold them, and might even reward them. Many of them began to act freely, unleashing their long-suppressed nature.
The kitchen helper brought out the long-broken iron pot, as if playing its final symphony with its life on the line. The sound of it clanging and banging made Feng Ran, the instigator, almost foam at the mouth.
The power of unbridled expression is terrifying... well, you haven't seen what comes next.
After the drumbeats, which were barely audible, started up like a group of demons on steroids, completely disregarding the audience's well-being. After one person finished yelling, another would take the stage, and if they couldn't out-yell, they would jump higher.
Xiuer pursed her lips. She couldn't laugh, much less cry. She was a character with a role to play and couldn't let loose. She closed her eyes, and if she could, she would have covered her ears. She was trying to maintain her image by speaking in a high-pitched voice, but it was too noisy, and Xiuer's voice cracked as she shouted, "Don't underestimate me just because I'm a sheep. I'm the most beautiful on the whole grassland. Farmers, wolves, sheepdogs, they all love me, the sheep."
Feng Ran stroked her chin. "A certain hero, is this the tune?"
Whether it's right or wrong, the yellow sparrow has already started performing a mime act, holding its little head high as it walks past what appears to be a farmer, a lone wolf, and a sheepdog. Xiong Qi, who plays the lone wolf, even chimes in, saying, "I will definitely come back!"
The yellow bird paired with a tender, affectionate face.
Xiong Qi pressed on, continuing to sing at the top of his lungs, "I know it's not easy to eat you, so I'm willing to wear a sheep's skin to cuddle with you. A wolf falls in love with a sheep, that's how crazy it is." After howling, Xiong Qi blinked, as if he had misremembered. He looked around; no one had noticed him, and no one had heard him. Yes, this was the script, that's right!
Feng Ran had a gut feeling that the plot had fallen apart, but she couldn't figure out what was wrong. After all, it was an impromptu creation, and it was already quite ingenious to present it in this form, right? She thought uncertainly.
The usually taciturn chef, with a belly full of fat, pulled out a suona from behind his back. As expected of a magical instrument, the moment the suona started playing, feet chased on the ground, souls floated in the sky, and minds searched in the ditch.
The lewd tone was truly deceptive. The crowd, so engrossed in his devilish dance moves, nearly banged their heads on the ground. What kind of script was this? They had never heard of it before. Under the menacing threat of the lewd tune, the crowd's gazes were like those of demons begging for food.
There's no way around it, they're in competition now. The Crown Princess promised to reward the top three who impressed the Crown Prince the most with a whole year's salary. They have to work hard, strive, and if they're not satisfied, they'll step up!
Adding scenes is shameful, but they still want to add them!
The rest is unbearable to watch. Even the three pillars couldn't salvage the plot. Feng Ran originally wanted to stage a story where a wolf falls in love with a lamb, but the lamb only wants to be a heartthrob and refuses to be loved. What is this now? Is it a zoo where males and females compete for each other?
Huang Que, Xiu'er, and Xiong Qi put on an "I've done my best" face, which made Feng Ran feel terrible. She had seen every development in the situation. Ever since the suona came on stage, these people had been competing like lunatics, each of them working out of line to an absurd degree. Now, even if she wanted to stop them, she would be too embarrassed to spoil their fun.
Feng Ran was initially trying to focus on Duan Jingchuan's expression, but the chaotic scene dazzled her, and her attention was completely drawn to him. She completely forgot what her original intention was.
How is Duan Jingchuan doing now?
He noticed Feng Ran as soon as she appeared, but his gaze wandered off.
When Xiuer first opened his mouth to sing, he felt as if his fingers had been scalded by boiling water. He tried his best to maintain his expression so that others wouldn't laugh at him, but he really couldn't help but feel that Xiong Qi's off-key singing was like a foreign wolf. He felt that what was burning him was not a bowl of boiling water, but a basin of water that was poured over his head. He could clearly feel that his pupils and nostrils were dilated, and his clenched teeth were his last act of stubbornness.
Unexpectedly, the next attack wasn't on his tightly closed mouth. In his colorful vision, he spotted the old Marquis Duan, who was laughing so hard he was cramping up, and his brothers and sisters whose mouths could fit a goose egg. He suddenly felt an invisible hand tearing at his internal organs. In his stagnant breathing, he vaguely remembered what Xiuer had said: "New Year's greetings from the Marquis's mansion."
Soon, Xiu'er's off-key voice pulled him back to the depths of despair. The tingling sensation at the corner of his mouth warned him not to laugh out loud. He gripped his thighs tightly with both hands, and upon closer inspection, Duan Jingchuan's entire body was exhibiting irregular, subtle tremors.
But it doesn't matter, no one will notice him at this point in time.
Duan Jingchuan thought he could keep his composure and tried his best not to show any strange expressions. He had lived with his wife for so long and shouldn't be so naive. He should be tolerant, tolerant, and composed.
The sound of the suona startled a flock of birds, causing them to shed feathers. One of the larger birds even crashed to the ground with a thud.
Hmm? That's Father!
He gasped, and just as he was about to go over to check, Old Master Duan suddenly sprang to his feet and landed lightly on the ground. He had never seen his father laugh so...unrestrained and carefree in his entire life.
A note from the author:
This chapter contains a lot of fabricated and nonsensical nonsense. If you feel uncomfortable, just consider it as me having entered a hallucination after eating white sticks and red umbrellas.
I can also share the inspiration behind this dream. Last night I had a dream that Feng Ran turned into a wolf and ate Duan Jingchuan, who was a sheep. Then she gave birth to a wolf-sheep hybrid with a husky's head and a Don't's body. When I woke up, I felt that one of the male and female leads and I was going to go crazy. I love them so much, of course I have to let them experience my wicked sense of humor.
The above quotes a small portion of the lyrics and melody; please don't throw rotten eggs at me.
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