Chapter 126 As long as you grow up, everything will be fine
When Wang Yixun returned to the office, Zhang Meng had already left.
Xing Yu sat expressionlessly on the sofa in the office.
As usual, there was no trace of emotion on Leng Jue's face.
But the bottom of his eyes were empty and dark, as if his soul had been taken away.
Long before Xing Yu came, Wang Yixun had heard Zhang Meng talk about some of Lin Yan's past.
Although he couldn't empathize with Xiaobao, he could imagine that if those things happened to him, he would go crazy!
Putting aside his usual nonchalant look, he sat down next to Xing Yu.
"Old Xing, think more positively... At least Lin Yan is safe and sound by your side now..."
After a long while, Xing Yu said, "Give me a cigarette."
Wang Yixun took out a cigarette box, shook out a cigarette and handed it to him. At a casual glance, he saw that Xing Yu's fingertips holding the cigarette were trembling slightly.
He took out a lighter and lit it for him.
"Old Xing, how about having a drink with you?"
Xing Yu shook his head and took a deep puff of cigarette.
I haven't touched a cigarette for a long time, and when I exhaled the smoke, my eyes felt a little hot.
He closed his eyes, his throat dry: "Maybe I didn't give her enough sense of security... She refused to tell me anything..."
Wang Yixun advised him: "Old Xing, you've done a great job. If I had your patience and perseverance, would I be dumped by Xiaobao? Lin Yan didn't tell you because she cares about you and doesn't want you to worry."
Xing Yu twitched the corners of his lips in self-mockery, a look of self-pity flashed across his face. He lowered his eyes to stare at the scarlet cigarette butt between his fingertips and spoke slowly.
"Wang Yixun, don't you always ask me why I have to be with Lin Yan..."
"Before I was nine... I had never seen the light of a star... Once, someone pushed me into the water, and as I struggled, I thought to myself, 'Life is tiring...'"
"Just for a moment... I stopped wanting to live... I just wanted to drown, to fall, to be swallowed by the river..."
"When I breathed a breath of thin air from suffocation, I realized... she went to call someone to save me..."
"She likes to bury leaves under trees, she likes to look directly at the sun, she lets me know that being alive isn't so bad... She also likes to say to me with a smile, 'As long as you grow up, everything will be fine'..."
A burning cigarette ash from his fingertips suddenly fell on his pants, but he ignored it, put the cigarette in his mouth and took another puff.
The dense smoke obscured his red eyes.
He suddenly smiled bitterly, and the extremely slow voice continued to sound.
"Ayan must be very disappointed... She hasn't changed for the better after growing up... The world hasn't changed for the better... Nothing has changed for the better. She must be utterly disappointed..."
Xing Yu has always been a man of few words. In Wang Yixun's impression, he is a person who hides his emotions in his heart and never reveals his true feelings to others easily.
Hearing him say so much at once, Wang Yixun felt bitter inside...
Faced with such a Xing Yu, he was at a loss for words.
I had no idea what to say, so I could only pat his shoulder again and again.
After a while, the smoke cleared.
Xing Yu closed his eyes and leaned back on the sofa: "Go out, I'll be alone for a while."
"Well, call me if you need anything."
The orange-red sunset was gradually swallowed by the night.
It was already evening when Wang Yixun returned to the office again.
Xing Yu was still sitting on the sofa with an expressionless face, but the pack of cigarettes on the table had all turned into black butts in the ashtray.
The entire office was filled with white smoke and a strong, pungent smell of cigarettes.
Wang Yixun opened the window to let in some fresh air and approached him. "Old Xing, you've already smoked a whole pack of cigarettes in just a few hours? You reek of cigarettes! Aren't you planning on going home?"
"No." Xing Yu: "Not tonight."
"Why?"
"I haven't decided yet."
"What have you thought of?"
Xing Yu said in a low voice: "I haven't figured it out yet. How should I pretend that nothing happened... and face her as if nothing happened..."
"Old Xing, you might as well just..."
Before Wang Yixun finished speaking, Xing Yu's cell phone rang.
Xing Yu's throat began to ache when he saw the two words on the caller ID.
I didn't want to answer it, but I couldn't help it.
After adjusting his voice, he answered the phone.
"Ayan."
"Are you back? I cooked for you today and made your favorite braised fish and stir-fried beef with celery."
"Then I'm in for a treat."
"Come back soon, the soup is almost ready."
"good……"
After chatting for a few words, Xing Yu hung up the phone, stood up and looked at Wang Yixun.
"Do you have any clean shirts?"
"Yes." Wang Yixun: "What's wrong?"
"It smells like smoke, change your clothes."
"Want to go back?"
"Um."
"Okay, I'll get it for you. Don't come to Manzun these few days. Stay at home and accompany Lin Yan."
…
After driving back to the underground garage of the community, Xing Yu did not go upstairs immediately. He sat in the car and ate two mint candies to make sure that there was no smell of cigarettes on his body before going upstairs.
It was Su Xin who opened the door, grinning carefreely as usual.
"Brother Xing Yu is back? Sister Lin Yan made a lot of delicious food today, let's get ready to eat!"
Xing Yu changed his shoes and walked into the house, and saw Lin Yan busy in the kitchen at a glance.
For some reason, he never dared to step forward.
Lin Yan turned around and glanced at him, raising her lips: "Are you back? Go wash your hands and eat."
Xing Yu nodded but said nothing.
During the meal, Xing Yu sat next to Lin Yan, picking up food for her, remaining silent and not even making eye contact with her.
Even Su Xin felt strange: "Brother Xing Yu, what's wrong with you? You look unhappy."
"without."
Lin Yan looked at him sideways and teased, "Coach Xing, is the food not to your liking?"
"No." Xing Yu raised his hand and rubbed her hair: "It's delicious."
After dinner, Su Xin took the initiative to wash the dishes.
Lin Yan saw Xing Yu return to the room, took a deep breath and followed him.
After closing the door, she hugged him from behind, pressing her cheek against his strong back.
"Xing Yu...are you smoking?"
"I took one. Wang Yixun gave it to me."
"Xing Yu."
Xing Yu lowered his head and held the hand around his waist: "What's wrong, Ayan?"
Lin Yan didn't respond.
Xing Yu turned around and stared at her: "What do you want to say?"
Lin Yan smiled gently, her eyes sparkling: "Nothing."
Xing Yu looked straight into her eyes, and his heart couldn't help but flash with pain.
He reached out and pulled her into his arms, caressing her back with his palm.
Through the thin fabric, he accidentally touched the uneven scars on her back.
My heart shrank into a ball again.
"Ayan...it hurts, right?" She must have been in a lot of pain over the years.
Lin Yan raised her head and her eyes met his.
“It used to hurt a lot… but now, it doesn’t hurt anymore…” Because he’s here.
The corners of Xing Yu's lips trembled and his eyes were red.
When she lowered her head for a moment, the tears she had been suppressing couldn't help but slide down her face.
Lin Yan looked at him with complicated eyes.
In the afternoon, she received a call from Dr. Hou and learned that Xing Yu had already gone to see Dr. Hou...
Lin Yan raised her hand and gently wiped away the tears on his face, gave him a light smile, and opened her lips calmly.
"Xing Yu... I'm fine... Think positively, maybe I wasn't in darkness, but was actually taking root..."
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