Chapter 32: Human Cowardice
Yuan Dongyuan was a very kind old man; that was Xie Huailing's first impression of him.
Martial arts masters and renowned heroes in their twilight years often possess an enduring aura of chivalry. Some, like Lei Sun, who held high positions, exuded an imposing and awe-inspiring presence, their extraordinary qualities readily apparent to anyone with eyes to see. While some of these elders were kind-faced, they were all unlike Yuan Dongyuan. Yuan Dongyuan possessed very little of the characteristics of a江湖人 (jianghu person, a figure associated with the martial arts world). He was more like an old man from a scholarly family who had long since retired, indifferent to worldly affairs, never vying for anything, and having remained detached from worldly matters for many years.
But the "non-contention" of Wuzheng Villa is not the "non-contention" of being indifferent to the world, which is Xie Huailing's second impression.
Yuan Dongyuan couldn't have guessed that this young lady, who was visiting for the first time, had already scrutinized him a thousand times over. He poured Xie Huailing a steaming cup of tea and said with a smile, "Miss Xie, do you like Longjing tea?"
He seemed to dislike having servants to wait on him, preferring to handle everything himself. When Xie Huailing knocked on his courtyard door, it was Yuan Dongyuan who opened it himself; he didn't even seem to have any personal servants. She recalled the intelligence from the Golden Wind and Fine Rain Pavilion: Yuan Dongyuan was someone who, even in his most naive, arrogant, and ignorant youth, never left Wuzheng Manor. He quietly stayed in that magnificent ancestral home, surrounded by letters informing him of decline and rise and fall. After turning fifty, he didn't leave the house for ten years.
If Yuan Suiyun hadn't made such a grave mistake, Yuan Dongyuan might never have left, spending the rest of his life waiting for his death at Wuzheng Manor.
The rising steam, along with the lingering fragrance of incense, created an extremely tranquil scene. Xie Huailing presented the teacup with both hands, saying politely, "Thank you, Master Yuan. I've never been picky about tea."
Yuan Dongyuan found her words interesting and asked her with a smile, "Not picky about tea? This is the first time I've ever met a child your age who isn't picky about tea. I remember Xiaoyun and Lingzhi from Wanfu Wanshouyuan could even distinguish the different grades of tea. Maybe I've just not seen enough of them."
The "Xiao Yun" he mentioned was naturally his son, Yuan Suiyun, the perpetrator of the tragedy. He truly doted on him, and would unconsciously mention him to outsiders, no wonder he was willing to risk everything to help him clean up the mess. However, the situation was tense, and it wasn't advisable to ask too many questions about Yuan Suiyun, so Xie Huailing didn't press the matter.
Yuan Dongyuan was clearly not finished speaking. He had been lost in thought about other things while discussing tea and knowledge, and then he cut himself off.
The wooden box that Xie Huailing had prepared in the carriage was already placed on the table. The interior was simply furnished, resembling an ordinary farmhouse. The only thing that could slightly indicate status was a tree in full bloom outside. A clump of its blossoming branches grew into the house, casting an elegant shadow that fell directly onto the wooden box. When Xie Huailing removed the lid, the shadow fell into the box, and the petals' shadows brushed against the cover of the manuscript.
The cover was yellowed and wrinkled. The author of the play was probably strapped for cash when he wrote it, unable to afford better paper. Now, having bought it, the pages were worn and tattered, riddled with insect bites and the edges curled and frayed. She handled it gently, placing it from the box onto the table. The floral image on the cover detached, revealing only three words—not even the author's signature.
A Tale of Wandering. This was the key to Xie Huailing's arrival here today. She had to thank Di Feijing properly for this progress.
"My mother married far away to the Northeast more than ten years ago and gave birth to me there. She only brought some things from within the Northeast with her, including some opera excerpts, which I read and learned to read official characters when I was young." Xie Huailing slowly and deliberately told the story he had made up. "Among them is 'The Tale of the Drifting Life,' which I couldn't understand when I was young and never wanted to read, but my mother loved it very much. Now that my parents have passed away, hearing people sing 'The Tale of the Drifting Life' again evoked many emotions, so I asked my cousin to help me find the original manuscript of 'The Tale of the Drifting Life.'"
"Upon learning the whereabouts of the two volumes, I immediately went to buy the second half and then came to visit the original owner of the estate. I asked him to part with it, or perhaps I could exchange the two volumes with him for a period of time."
She lowered her head, her expression filled with indescribable sorrow: "I know this is asking the impossible, but I still dared to come and ask, thinking that perhaps I can take a good look at these two original volumes. Now I will no longer be completely unable to understand them. When my mother and I married far away, we were both around the same age."
She didn't utter a single word of longing, yet her sorrow flowed like rain, utterly genuine. It was precisely the sadness revealed in her words that stunned Yuan Dongyuan. He didn't know what he was thinking, but as if he had been drenched in sweat, he couldn't speak. His aged face was also moved, the deep lines of his features remaining motionless for a long time.
After a long while, Yuan Dongyuan smiled again. He was indeed amiable from the inside out: "If we were to switch places, how would Miss Xie possibly enjoy looking at it properly? I'll go find it for you later, and you can take it. I haven't looked at it for many years anyway, and at my age, I won't be looking at it again in the future. Besides, when your mother was still alive, she and my wife had a close friendship despite their age difference, so you can come to me as soon as possible."
He chuckled a few times after he finished speaking, displaying a kind and amiable demeanor.
Xie Huailing thanked him repeatedly, then feigned a question and asked, "So my mother and Madam Yuan had a past relationship? Is that so?"
Yuan Dongyuan hadn't expected her to ask. He was lost in his memories, the light in his eyes momentarily dimming. He said, "It was twenty years ago. I don't remember clearly. My wife has been gone for almost twenty years. I only remember that they made a promise that after I went to travel the world with her, punishing evil and upholding justice, we would visit your mother. Unfortunately, even I couldn't fulfill that promise. Back then, the martial world was in chaos, and I..."
The remaining words were like a fishbone, stuck in his mouth, neither going in nor out. The old man before him wanted to feign nonchalance and utter them, but his regret and complex emotions had already fallen into Xie Huailing's eyes before he could. Beneath her feigned sorrow, her cold and unfeeling soul coldly watched him. Yuan Dongyuan still spoke, trying so hard to appear nonchalant, which only made him seem a little pitiful. This was where his amiable exterior and his less-than-honorable behavior could coexist.
He said, "...I don't have that kind of talent."
The heir to the three-hundred-year-old Wuzheng Manor, the descendant of countless heroes and valiant warriors, and the offspring of an unparalleled martial arts master, he lacked the talent to reach the pinnacle of martial arts in his thirties or forties.
What was the martial arts world like twenty years ago? Guan Qi, Fang Geyin... and Tie Zhongtang, the Night Emperor who had not yet completely retired, and in the future, there were countless peerless masters. But wasn't Yuan Qingshan a master like that back then? In the three hundred years of Wuzheng Manor, did no such master emerge again? Perhaps not. Otherwise, why was it "uncontested" for three hundred years?
But as the saying goes, "He built a tall building, and he collapsed; people leave and the tea grows cold," and everything eventually comes to an end. Yuan Dongyuan was not that kind of genius; he wasn't even a prodigy like Shui Mu Yin Ji or Mu Daoren. He could only watch helplessly as the situation in the martial world changed drastically, Wuzheng Manor declined day by day, and villains filled the martial world, before he shut himself away and never came out.
He probably didn't want to say it, but Xie Huailing couldn't possibly be unaware, so he said: "This matter isn't a secret among the prominent figures in the martial arts world." Whether he wanted to face it or not, in his sixty years of life, he had never had a moment where his talent shone brightly. At sixty years old, it would be too petty of him not to admit it.
But such an admission is all the more tragic.
After saying this, perhaps feeling that he had concealed his true feelings well, Yuan Dongyuan said to her, "Please give my regards to Master Su. In the martial arts world today, Master Su is the most talented young man."
Xie Huailing readily agreed. Being a considerate younger generation, she naturally changed the subject, choosing poetry and literature to discuss with Yuan Dongyuan. Having secluded himself for so many years, Yuan Dongyuan had naturally read extensively and spoke eloquently about it. They avoided discussing martial arts, and Xie Huailing would subtly express her doubts and thirst for knowledge at opportune moments, then move on to theatrical performances, which Yuan Dongyuan would then answer for her. For a time, it seemed like a pleasant exchange between young and old.
She handled the situation very well. Yuan Dongyuan was still somewhat unsatisfied, so he immediately found the first half of "The Wandering Chronicles" for her and praised her, saying, "Miss Xie's knowledge is already among the best of the young people in the martial arts world. Her eagerness to learn is extremely valuable. If there is anything you don't understand in the future, as long as I am still in Bianjing, you can come and ask me."
Xie Huailing thanked him again and immediately said without hesitation, "Thank you for your kind words, Master Yuan. However, it is late today, so I will take my leave now. I apologize for disturbing you, Master Yuan."
Her gaze lingered on the Book of Wanderings, and she said, "I'll visit again another day. It just so happens that I've always had many parts of the Book of Wanderings that I don't understand. I only have a vague understanding of it. I don't know why someone who originally wanted to do good, fulfill his parents' expectations, and establish a heart for the people, even though no one was forcing him, ended up like that. Was he really just going with the flow?"
Yuan Dongyuan said, "Miss Xie is not even twenty years old yet, so it's understandable that she has some troubles. Life is full of karmic obstacles; no one can see through life without any troubles. Even someone like the person in this 'Wandering Chronicle,' with the highest aspirations, is simply someone who hasn't yet been tempered by the harsh realities of life. And then, his wife passed away..."
He abruptly stopped speaking, realizing something and quickly looking at Xie Huailing, but Xie Huailing's eyes were wide open in confusion, and she still didn't quite understand, making him think he was overthinking it. Indeed, it was the first time he had met this girl; she didn't understand him either, so why would she make veiled attacks on him?
Yuan Dongyuan didn't say anything more, unaware that his every move was being observed by Xie Huailing.
That's about enough, so there's no need to stay any longer. She got up to take her leave, taking the two original volumes with her.
After leaving the Wuzheng Manor in Bianjing, the carriage of the Golden Wind and Fine Rain Pavilion was already waiting on the road. A maid lifted the curtain for her, and there was another person in the spacious carriage, casually leaning against the window with her arms crossed. Her hair was styled in an unusual way, quite different from her usual style. It was Shaman, whom she had sent out.
"How are things on your end?" Xie Huailing asked bluntly.
Shaman showed no displeasure, suggesting that everything had gone smoothly: "I met Yuan Suiyun, and he even had the leisure to go buy books. I don't know what Chu Daoshuai did, but since he didn't come to see me, he must have succeeded."
"That's good." Xie Huailing nodded and sat down next to Shaman. "I still need to go back and talk to the owner of Yuandongyuan again. I found that there are quite a few people here. He is a very timid person."
Shaman heard a word that surprised her and asked in return, "Cowardice?"
Xie Huailing replied, “Exactly. He was not only a coward, but also someone who knew his cowardice and became even more cowardly. However, if he hadn't had Yuan Suiyun as a son, perhaps he would have lived a more peaceful life, and his cowardice wouldn't have been so obvious. That's really…”
She didn't say the second half of her sentence, so Shaman could only guess. She pondered for a moment and said, "Miss, are you pitying him? What he did, disregarding the lives of others for his own son, is utterly immoral and devoid of conscience. A person with a conscience doesn't need to pity him; it's not worth it."
To everyone's surprise, Xie Huailing suddenly turned around, as if to confirm what she had just said, and then leaned his head closer, the two of them instantly becoming extremely close, which gave Shaman goosebumps. She didn't have many friends and didn't like getting close to people, so when he got so close, she reflexively moved back. Xie Huailing, however, didn't turn his head and continued to stare at her, and Shaman suddenly felt a chill run down her spine.
Then Xie Huailing took her hand and said, "Conscience? Thank you so much. You are the first person in my life to say that I have a conscience. Thank you for acknowledging my non-existent personality."
Shaman didn't care whether this person was her boss or not, and pulled her hand back, retreating several times.
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Shaman: Leaving one lunatic, there's another lunatic.
The settings for Wuzheng Manor and the original Dongyuan Garden are largely my own creations based on the limited descriptions in Chu Liuxiang's original work, combined with the background of various martial arts novels. They are almost entirely my own creations that serve the plot, and I apologize for that.
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