0053 night
After Song Ning and Shen Yuxiu went upstairs, Shen Yuxiu told Song Ning to go to sleep first, and then took his pajamas and went into the bathroom to take a shower.
Song Ning lay in bed, listening to the sound of running water in the bathroom. She turned over, unable to sleep, then got up, walked to the door of the master bathroom, and knocked: "Shen Yuxiu."
The sound of water stopped, and the bathroom door opened a crack. Shen Yuxiu stood in the doorway and asked with concern, "What's wrong?"
His hair was still foamy, and water was dripping down his muscular chest. He had a towel wrapped around his waist that barely covered the middle of his strong thighs. It was clear that he had been taking a shower when he heard her knocking and came to open the door.
Song Ning glanced at him quickly, looked him in the eye calmly, and said without changing her expression, "I just forgot to brush my teeth."
Shen Yuxiu was surprised at first, then suddenly laughed, understanding yet helpless: "Can't we wait a little while?"
"I'm sleepy, I can't wait any longer." Song Ning told a clumsy lie. There were two bathrooms in the house, so even if she really couldn't wait, she could go to the other bathroom.
"Come in." Shen Yuxiu didn't expose Song Ning's lie. He walked into the shower room, turned on the showerhead, and continued rinsing himself while wrapped in a towel.
Between the bathroom sink and the shower stall was a sliding black-framed glass door. Song Ning walked to the sink, squeezed toothpaste onto her toothbrush, and her gaze fell on the bath towel in the mirror: "You're taking a shower wearing a bath towel?"
After rinsing the foam off his head, Shen Yuxiu turned off the shower. The wet towel clung to his thighs, outlining the obvious lines between his legs, making it even more obvious that he was trying to cover up the problem.
Shen Yuxiu seemed oblivious, calmly squeezing shower gel onto his hands and lathering it: "I'm not sleepy, go to sleep quickly after you're done washing up."
Song Ning screwed on the toothpaste cap, paused for a moment in mid-air, then suddenly placed the toothbrush on the sink, turned around, and asked through the condensed glass door, "Need any help?"
Outside the shower room, the fragrance of Yulong tea wafted out from under the door, along with the scent of his custom-made shower gel, which was refreshing and delightful.
Her gaze shifted to his bulge: "Aren't you uncomfortable like this?"
"It's a physiological reaction, don't worry about it." Shen Yuxiu turned his back, leaving Song Ning with only a vague, broad silhouette, and answered casually.
"what ever."
Song Ning knew that Shen Yuxiu was determined not to touch her tonight. She casually pursed her lips, walked back to the sink, pretended to brush her teeth, and lay back down on the bed.
After a while, the aroma of Jade Dragon Tea wafted from behind. Shen Yuxiu embraced Song Ning: "Asleep?"
"Hmm," Song Ning replied listlessly.
Shen Yuxiu smiled, his expression affectionate and indulgent.
His gentle, warm breath tickled the back of Song Ning's neck: "Get a good rest tonight, I'll take you to the racetrack tomorrow."
Song Ning slowly opened her eyes, seemingly lost in thought: "Then come with me to buy clothes tomorrow, I don't have any suitable clothes."
"Hmm, shall we go see a movie together again?" Shen Yuxiu's face was tickled by her hair, so he tilted his chin up and pressed down a few strands of her long hair.
Which one to watch?
There's a sci-fi movie that I've heard is pretty good.
“You always get hung up on the issues in sci-fi movies, why don’t you watch something else?”
"How about watching a comedy New Year's movie?"
"You have a very low threshold for laughter."
"Is there anything you'd like to see?"
...
As they spoke, the sounds in the room gradually subsided, until only steady breathing remained.
In the middle of the night, Shen Yuxiu felt his arm being pulled painfully. He woke up and found that Song Ning had turned her head to face him, nestled in his arms like an ostrich.
Song Ning gripped his arm, her nails digging deep into his flesh, groaning in pain as she slept restlessly.
Shen Yuxiu recalled how he used to hear her screams in the middle of the night from the balcony of his downstairs room, and how she would sometimes sob quietly on the balcony, afraid of being discovered. His chest clenched painfully.
"It's alright, it's alright..."
Knowing she was having a nightmare, Shen Yuxiu gently stroked her hair and patted her waist, singing a lullaby softly as if soothing a child.
The person in his arms trembled slightly and breathed heavily. After Shen Yuxiu sang "The Little Insects Fly" five or six times, her body gradually relaxed.
Shen Yuxiu was worried that she was having another nightmare, so he kept his eyes open and dared not fall asleep again.
He smelled the faint scent of essential oils in her hair, and his thoughts drifted back to many years ago.
At that time, he didn't know how to comfort her, so he thought of giving her a cell phone so that he could talk to her if she wanted.
At first, he was worried that she wouldn't call him, but later he found that his worries were unnecessary.
She seemed to have a habit of listening to people talk at night, and after getting her phone, she would always find various excuses to call him.
He later learned that her mother would read to her and tell her stories every night, and his words at that time touched upon her deepest longing.
The thought that she treated him like a "mother" made him feel both annoyed and amused, but a sense of pity and gratitude for being trusted and relied upon also rose in his heart.
She was a woman of few words, and he wasn't a talkative person either, so at first he would tell her stories and read to her. Then one time, she said she wanted to hear him sing.
He is tone-deaf. Although he passed the piano grade 10 exam thanks to his nimble fingers and super memory and comprehension, he cannot sing.
But unable to resist her request, he could only stumble and sing her the simplest song.
She was mischievous, and ever since that incident, she would watch him make a fool of himself every night. He had secretly practiced singing, but his talent was limited. If it weren't for his good voice, his singing would probably have been a disaster.
In short, whether it was Dr. Chen's medical skills or the effect of his nightly chanting, she gradually stopped having nightmares. Years later, he finally learned the reason why she stopped having nightmares.
Nevertheless, they maintained the habit of chatting in the evenings for several years until he went abroad and the time difference reduced the frequency.
He thought that she would be the one who would feel uncomfortable after the frequency was reduced, but when Su Qingru said that she hadn't changed, he felt a tightness in his chest. Only then did he realize that the one who was really uncomfortable was him.
He heard from abroad that she was always skipping classes, playing with cars, going to bars, getting tattoos, playing with knives, and hanging out with people who dressed differently. He was worried that she had made some bad friends, so he frequently returned to China, so frequently that he didn't even realize that he was only returning to China because he wanted to see her.
At that time, she seemed to be obsessed with dyeing her hair. When he came back, he would always see that her hair color had changed one after another. He didn't know if it was because she was young, but despite all the fuss, her hair was still very healthy.
At the time, he was worried that dyeing her hair would be bad for it, but he didn't want to stop her from doing so, so he could only ask his classmates with thick hair how to take care of their hair.
So much so that they all thought he was facing baldness at such a young age. Even when he explained that he was asking for his sister, they looked at him with an "I know" look. Later, he stopped explaining and just sent back the things his classmates recommended one by one.
Who knew that she would naturally treat him as a personal shopper, asking him to bring her things every few days, to the point that he developed the habit of taking pictures of things wherever he went and posting them on his WeChat Moments, because he didn't know if she would like them, and also to let her know what he was doing.
Over time, this became a game between the two of them. He would post, and she would contact him if she liked something, or just give him a like if she didn't. It was heartless, but he enjoyed it immensely.
Jiang Xisheng mocked him for taming animals, but only he knew that he was the beast.
When he realized his feelings for her were different, he instinctively avoided her. The immoral emotions made him feel despicable and filthy, yet he couldn't suppress his feelings for her. And after realizing it, they became even more uncontrollable, like a flood.
When she kissed him for the first time, he shamelessly craved the scent of wine on her lips and the lingering warmth of her skin, and did not immediately push her away.
When she confessed her feelings to him, he neither dared to say he loved her nor that he didn't. He could only respond with ambiguous answers. But the love she wanted was too extreme. She didn't understand his words and thought he didn't love her.
He was both relieved that she hadn't understood and selfishly wished she had. But he knew very well that if she had, he would only have pushed her further away.
She thought he was a perfect good person back then, but Shen Yuxiu knew very well that she had thought too highly of him; he was never a good person.
He is gentle and polite to people because he has no demands on them and is indifferent to how they are treated.
He appears humble and reserved, but deep down he has his own pride, which is the confidence that comes from his superior talent since childhood, and also the reason why he doesn't need to bow down to anyone.
He was not an indecisive person; he even had a strong sense of self-righteousness and arrogance. But when it came to her, he was always hesitant and conflicted.
He wanted Song Ning to meet more people, but at the same time, he was so jealous of her being with other people that he tossed and turned all night.
Especially after Cheng Yanchu appeared in her life, she seemed very cold whenever he tried to contact her, as if she wanted to draw a line between them. He comforted himself by saying that it was because he had been rejected, but he couldn't help but wonder if she was ignoring him because of Cheng Yanchu.
When he heard that she was dating Cheng Yanchu, he felt jealousy slowly eroding his heart. He had to deceive himself into thinking that it was fine for her to date someone her own age, but secretly he hoped they would break up soon. Even when he later found out it was a rumor, it still pricked him like a thorn from time to time.
She has always been popular with boys. Her outstanding appearance and unconventional personality can arouse men's desire to conquer her. Just as Jiang Xisheng said, she is like the eye of a storm, sweeping up both the good and the bad.
Most of the time, she can handle trouble on her own, but there are a few times when she can't.
He wasn't omniscient; it's just that she was investigating her parents for a while, so he had someone follow her and help her deal with a few troubles along the way.
He initially only knew that her mother's case was handled quickly, with only one local newspaper mentioning it briefly as a car accident, stating that the mother had died and the daughter was seriously injured and still in a coma.
He later discovered through investigation that the information was deliberately released to avoid further retaliation. It was normal that she couldn't find the information because Shen Xiaoyue wouldn't let her investigate, fearing she wouldn't be able to handle the truth.
At that time, he didn't know what to do. Whether he tried to stop her or help her, he would always remember her stubborn, suppressed cries at night.
Later, they crossed the line. She stood up for him, her palms bleeding profusely, leaving a deep scar. Just watching the footage on the bar's security camera was heartbreaking.
So he decided to let her go, thinking that this would make things easier and freer for both of them, but he was wrong.
She became sensible, ambitious, and well-behaved, but she was no longer the real Song Ning.
He used to think that as long as she was safe, he could tolerate whatever she did. But seeing her unintentional forbearance, he also hoped that she could be the carefree, ignorant and fearless version of herself.
But she eventually grew up and was no longer the willful Song Ning. He didn't know if it was a good thing or a bad thing, he only knew that she was more unhappy. That was not his original intention, nor was it the purpose of letting her go.
He felt that he had done something wrong.
Looking at Song Ning, who couldn't even sleep peacefully in his arms, Shen Yuxiu once again doubted his decision.
What is truly best for her?
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