Everyone's younger brother? It's really confusing. Shi
Jin felt a little annoyed. In his whole life, he rarely felt annoyed or bored, but now he really felt a little annoyed. He wasn't annoyed by the continent, but by the brotherly relationship that seemed to be entangled forever.
"Is this going to end... Hey, Xiao Si, can I beat this guy with cream on his head to death? Can I beat him to death?"
Xiao Si didn't answer, and remained silent as if he had never existed.
Shi Jin couldn't stand it anymore, so he put his backhand on Rong Zhouzhong's arm and roughly pushed him back on the chair. He grabbed something and wiped the cream off his face, stared at his face, and said impatiently: "Rong Zhouzhong, don't you have a lot of dissatisfaction with me? Don't you hate me very much? Say it out, say it all, I want you to say it all!"
Rong Zhouzhong was dumbfounded by his series of actions. He looked at his rare impatient look in a daze, moved his lips, and called: "Xiao Jin..."
"Don't call me like that!'You fat guy','You stupid guy who knows nothing','You are so hateful and pitiful','Are you going to die, you are finally going to die','Why does the Shi family have to have a child like you', these are what you want to say, this is how you actually see me, say it, "Tell me everything, I want you to tell me everything, word for word!"
Shi Jin said fiercely, his voice gradually rising. He allowed himself to indulge in those unnecessary emotions, but he could never replace his own memories like last time. Suddenly, all of them surged over.
The surroundings were no longer the audio-visual room, but the gorgeous empty house of Country M, the miserable and terrible hospital, and the bed that made people unable to move. He sat in the empty house, in the deserted garden of the hospital, and lying on the cold bed. People around him came and went, but no one listened to him, and no one reached out to him. He was a disfigured monster, a poor fat man who was desperately waiting to die.
Then his favorite third brother came, with the attitude of a victor, with a condescending, sympathetic and mocking look, and said those vicious words that were heartbreaking.
[Shi Jin, I hate you, everyone hates you. In fact, you are not a child of the Shi family, look at you, you are so fat and ugly, a dead fat man. ]
[You actually want to unite Xu Tianhua and go against the eldest brother, are you stupid? Ah, no, I shouldn’t ask that, you are stupid, you idiot who knows nothing. ]
[Do you want to know the truth? I can tell you everything... You are crying now? You are really hateful and pitiful. ]
[How can everyone really treat you as a younger brother, don’t be naive, you are different from us... Why does the Shi family have a child like you. ]
[Are you going to die? You are finally going to die. Remember not to be born into the Shi family in your next life, no one wants a brother like you. 】
Memories came back fiercely, despair, grievance, anger, sadness and other emotions all rushed out at once, and those who did not fight back against these words because of shock, sadness, or physical reasons were even more unwilling to roar out, screaming to tear everything apart. Shi Jin closed his eyes tightly, and suddenly took out a dagger from his waist, and flicked the blade next to Rong Zhouzhong's handsome face.
Rong Zhouzhong's pupils shrank, and he said, "Shi Jin, what do you want to do!"
"I will kill you." Shi Jin looked at him, moved the dagger to his lips, and his eyes fell on it, with a faint sense of madness. "I am so uncomfortable... just because I started over again, just because I changed everything... and then you all forgot, only I still remember, only I am left! What makes you act like good brothers now, what I have experienced can be compensated by a few words of concern and a few words of apology, you don't even know what happened, you don't even know how cruel you have been, how can that kind of compensation be enough! And the weight of those apologies is so perfunctory! Why don't you remember it, remember it, remember it quickly, why don't you remember it!"
"Xiao Jin..." Rong Zhouzhong stared at him blankly, and reached out to touch his face, "Don't cry, don't cry..."
"Don't move!" Shi Jin suddenly had a fierce expression, pressed him hard against the backrest, and said coldly, "It doesn't matter if you can't remember, I will let you know what you did, follow me, you fat guy."
His shoulder hit the back of the chair and it hurt a little. Rong Zhouzhong looked at Shi Jin's obviously abnormal appearance, frowned and said, "Xiao Jin, you..." "
Hurry up and tell me!" Shi Jin cut off a strand of his hair with a dagger, and said solemnly, "If you don't tell me, the next time I'll cut your face."
He was serious, Shi Jin's words were serious, and he would really do it.
Rong Zhouzhong opened his mouth, but no sound came out. He couldn't say it, his intuition told him that he couldn't say those words, and everything would be over if he said them.
Shi Jin stared at his lips, his eyes filled with anticipation, but he did not hear any sound from Rong Zhouzhong.
"Why don't you say it!" His irritability became more intense, and he raised his dagger with a sharp look.
Rong Zhouzhong closed his eyes, waiting for the pain to come.
Puff. There was
a muffled sound, but the pain did not come.
Rong Zhouzhong was stunned, and tentatively opened his eyes, only to find that the dagger in Shi Jin's hand had penetrated the back of the seat directly next to his face, without hurting him at all.
"Why don't you just say it." Shi Jin lowered his head, his expression was covered by shadows and couldn't be seen clearly. "You are good brothers who have repented in time and didn't make big mistakes in your life. How can I blame you? If the only mistake was my care for you in the past ten years, then what can I do when I was spoiled by you and grew up... You don't even understand what I'm saying... Third brother, are you going to drive me crazy?"
Rong Zhouzhong was shocked by the dead silence in his tone. Seeing that he was about to leave, he reached out to pull his arm. Shi Jin
easily broke free from his hand and turned around to leave.
He couldn't let him go. If he left, everything would be gone.
"Xiao Jin!" Rong Zhouzhong got up and chased him.
Shi Jin threw the dagger directly at him, forcing him to stop, and then reached out to touch the door handle.
It's over, it's really over.
"You fat bastard!"
The voice struggled to escape from his throat. Rong Zhouzhong realized what he said after he finished yelling. His expression changed, as if he had thrown a dagger at Shi Jin. Even his fingertips began to tremble.
"No, no, Xiao Jin, I'm sorry..."
"Say it again." Shi Jin immediately stopped and looked over. The light in his eyes reappeared. He turned back and approached him, grabbed his arm, and said, "Say it again, with a more disdainful tone, a little more indifferent, you can do it, you can do it, say it again."
For a moment, Rong Zhouzhong actually saw Shi Jin smile. It was a smile of relief. He didn't understand. He felt like he was having a nightmare, like he was stripped naked and thrown in front of the public, like... like he was finally going to see the despicable filth in the deepest part of his heart.
He didn't want to say it, but how could he not say it, his brother was going crazy.
I'm sorry.
"You fat bastard." He restrained all his emotions, put on a condescending look, and said this in a disdainful and malicious tone.
Yes, he is like this, and at the beginning, he looked at his younger brother Shi Jin in this way. He is a monster with a poisonous needle in his heart, and he dreams of dragging that clean and simple brother into the abyss.
"You are an idiot who knows nothing."
The shorthand dialogue skills trained as an actor are damn useful. He looked at Shi Jin's gradually brightening eyes and vivid expressions, kept the mask on his face, and kept talking.
"You are so hateful and pitiful."
If it weren't for Shi Jin's efforts, he would definitely say these heart-wrenching words.
"Are you going to die? You are finally going to die."
He is such a bad person. At some point in the past, he actually thought that it would be better if Shi Jin could die.
"Why does the Shi family have to have a child like you?"
I'm sorry.
Sentence after sentence, he seemed to see himself cutting Shi Jin's heart one by one, watching him in agony, watching him bleed, watching him fall from hope to despair, from light to darkness.
These hurtful words that he had thought about but never said, and then suppressed in his heart pretending that they had never occupied his thoughts, it turns out that if you don't say them, the other party will never know, and you can pretend to be innocent. Some things, it turns out that just thinking about them will cause harm to the other party. Shi Jin
actually understands everything, but he is the one who doesn't understand.
"I'm sorry, Xiao Jin, I'm sorry." He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes tiredly.
It was this tone, this expression.
Shi Jin held his breath and looked at Rong Zhouzhong, watching his lips opening and closing, listening to his voice that was still pleasant even when he was speaking ill of him. Memory and reality slowly overlapped, and the resentment and anger that could not be fought back in his memory slowly swelled.
Finally, that mouth stopped, and all the harm from the enemy ended... He could fight back.
Phew.
It turns out that even if he had to start over again, he would have the opportunity to fight back for the harm that had never happened in his life.
The breath he had been holding suddenly relaxed. He looked up at Rong Zhouzhong, and suddenly raised his fist without any warning, hitting him hard on the corner of the mouth: "Go to hell! You bastard!"
Rong Zhouzhong groaned after being hit, fell to the ground on his side, and then simply sat on the ground, looking up at Shi Jin.
Shi Jin didn't even look at him. His voice was raised high, and he moved his feet nervously in circles on the spot. From time to time, he pointed at his face with his finger and said quickly: "Cry? Yes, I shouldn't cry. What's the use of crying in the face of your malice? When dealing with a vicious guy like you, I can just scold you! Fatty? What's wrong with me being fat? Personal attacks are the most despicable things people do! Do your fans know that you are actually so bad? When you said this, don't you think you are going too far?"
Memories and emotions covered him like a tide, and the scene around him changed again. It was a mansion, a hospital, and every heart-pounding sound of doors opening.
"Yes, I am fat and stupid, but isn't it you who made me like this intentionally or unintentionally? If I really become smart, you will blame me for being smart. Admit it, you are jealous of me, afraid of me, want to get close to me but are afraid to get close to me. Of course, I am different from you. I am a human being and you are devils. How can we be the same! Ha, the funniest thing is that you actually think I am pitiful? I have lived for more than ten years. Even if it is an illusion, I grew up in an environment of love. And you, one by one, indulge yourselves in interests and hatred. There is not a single warm memory in your decades of life. It is you who are really pitiful!"
Rong Zhouzhong tightened his palms and turned his head to avoid his sight.
"Are you mad to death? Are you disappointed to see that I didn't turn into a monster who only knows hatred as you wished, and became a cold-blooded guy like you? Do you dream of me taking revenge on you so that you can say, 'Look, that simple guy who was carefully protected by Shi Xingrui has finally become the same as us. He is no longer special.' I can almost hear the trembling excitement in your hearts!"
"I'm not." Rong Zhouzhong couldn't help but retort.
“No?” Shi Jin turned around and looked at him as if he had heard something out of the blue. He bent down and grabbed his collar, looked into his eyes and said, “If not, why are you so eager to turn against me and show your malice to me? You have hated a person unilaterally in your heart for more than ten years, and suddenly you see the possibility of making the other party respond to this hatred. With your straight-line idiotic thinking, how can you care about so many things? Cucumber pillow, huh? You can’t even wait for your father to die. Just knowing that he is dying, you rush to send something declaring war to me. Your thoughts are almost written on your face!”
Rong Zhouzhong was embarrassed and angry when his little thoughts, which he didn’t want to be peeped at, were exposed by the person concerned. He retorted: “I didn’t, you are an idiot!”
"No, I'm the 'idiot' and you're the idiot. We're the same. You don't have the right to be superior!" Shi Jin threw him to the ground again, stood up and looked down at him, and said coldly, "I won't die. I will live longer than all of you. You will never have the chance to say 'you're finally going to die' again in your life. Only I can say this. Also, let me correct a wrong idea of yours. Isn't the Shi family too many? "You didn't give birth to my child, but if it weren't for me, you and the others would never have been born! Be grateful to me, if I hadn't been reincarnated a few years later, you would all have been shot against the wall, sissy!" "
Empress" -
this sentence was simply a critical hit. Rong Zhouzhong looked at him in disbelief and got up from the ground. He looked so angry that he didn't know what to say. He tilted his head and took deep breaths frequently, as if trying to suppress his anger.
"Vase."
Shi Jin didn't stop yet, one sentence after another, and each word was uttered very heavily, as if he wanted to spit out all the resentment that had been suppressed in his heart for two lifetimes with his words.
"People with sharp tongues will have their tongues pulled out after they die."
"You are the one who is hateful and pitiful!"
"When you are about to die, I will go to your bedside and set off firecrackers to celebrate."
"I am not a superfluous child, you are!"
Rong Zhouzhong looked at him with his mouth slightly open, as if he couldn't believe that these words came out of his mouth. He should be angry in his heart, and there was indeed anger suppressed in his chest, but strangely he couldn't get angry. Shi
Jin suddenly approached him again.
Rong Zhouzhong came back to his senses and took a step back. He used toughness to cover up the sadness of his heart being pierced like a sieve, and frowned and said: "What else do you want to scold? If you want to fight, this time I will not endure not fighting back."
Shi Jin suddenly raised his hand and patted his heart, smiled at him wickedly, and said: "It must be uncomfortable to be scolded by me like this."
Rong Zhouzhong's expression was tense, and this was the only thing he was unwilling to admit.
"You deserve it." Shi Jin added softly, full of malice. "
You--" Rong Zhouzhong was really angry, and raised his hand to grab his wrist.
But Shi Jin dodged his hand again, took a step back and said: "I don't accept the apology you said before. Some injuries cannot be erased by an apology."
Rong Zhouzhong froze, and his anger dissipated instantly. Looking at his serious eyes that gradually regained their rationality, he gradually realized something, pulled the corner of his mouth and said: "Is that so..." So you are not ready to accept his hateful brother anymore?
"But we are even now." Shi Jin said, looking at Rong Zhouzhong's ferocious appearance at this moment. The memory of him speaking evil words in a condescending manner gradually disappeared, and he continued, "You scolded me, and I scolded you. You hurt me, and I hurt you. We don't owe each other anything. I am very tired, and you don't deserve me to be so tired."
Rong Zhouzhong's heart, which was sinking, suddenly stopped, and he looked up at him. A little hope emerged in his heart, and he said almost incoherently: "You, you say that... What do you mean..."
"Also, I won't apologize, and you will never hear an apology from me." Shi Jin walked to the door, touched the door handle, and his voice suddenly lowered. He said, "Good night, Third Brother."
Click.
The door opened and closed.
Rong Zhouzhong stared at the door blankly, and then his eyes gradually widened. After a long time, he suddenly squatted on the ground with his head down. He wanted to curse something, but when he blinked, a few crocodile tears flowed out of his eyes.
"You bastard..." He rubbed his face hard, angry and laughing, "You hold grudges more than me. You won't apologize for anything. Did you beat and scold me for nothing today? It hurts, okay..."
He collapsed on the ground and looked up at the movie screen. He saw that the elder brother in the movie was venting his malice towards his younger brother who already knew the truth. He shuddered in his heart, and with a disgusted sound, he moved to the small table, picked up the remote control, and quickly fast-forwarded the movie to the end. At the edge of the
cliff, the younger brother hugged his elder brother and wanted to fall off the cliff with him. The elder brother dropped his weapon, hugged his younger brother with his backhand, and closed his eyes with satisfaction. The two fell backwards together and fell into the abyss.
He watched carefully, suddenly tilted his head and snorted in boredom, turned off the screen, looked at the cake on the table with two pieces missing, reached out to pick up the plastic knife for cutting the cake, dug out a big piece, and stuffed it into his mouth.
At this moment, he finally understood what Shi Jin wanted to change. The child who was softer and kinder than everyone else, but stronger than everyone else, had worked hard until now, torturing himself to the point of going crazy. What he wanted to change was nothing more than the possible ending in the future where everyone would hold hatred and hurt each other, and then die together.
Hatred and redemption. Of the six children in the Shi family, the five seemingly strong brothers all chose the simplest hatred. Only the child who was hurt the most chose the most difficult redemption.
"So stupid." He seemed to be choked by the cake, and his voice slowly became hoarse and choked. "He is indeed a fool."
He lowered his head and raised his hands to cover his eyes.
...
The sky is the darkest before dawn. Shi Jin thought of this sentence. He walked down the second floor of the villa and took a look at the endless night outside the villa. He suddenly quickened his pace and ran towards the master bedroom on the first floor.
The door opened, and the light inside was on. He was stunned at first, then his heartbeat quickly accelerated, and he stepped into the door quickly.
A pair of arms suddenly stretched out and held him steadily in his arms. Shi Jin
stopped and looked sideways at the person who was hugging him.
"Take a shower to warm yourself up first." Lian Jun seemed to have known that he would rush back like this. He didn't ask anything. After hugging him, he just kissed his forehead gently, then took his hand and led him to the bathroom with the door open behind him. The
bathroom was steaming with mist. The bath water had already been prepared, and pajamas and various toiletries were also all prepared.
Shi Jin was a little stunned and was passively pulled under the shower by Lian Jun.
"Shower and then take a bath." Lian Jun helped him take off all his clothes, then turned on the shower. He didn't care whether his pajamas would get wet, and stood beside him to help him rinse his body carefully.
The skin was wetted by warm water, and then the hand soaked with shower gel was placed on the body, moving gently with a comfortable force. The body warmed up little by little, Shi Jin's fingers trembled, and seeing Lian Jun's serious look, he couldn't help but stretch out his arms to hug him.
Lian Jun hugged him back very naturally, and stroked his back soothingly.
His heart suddenly settled down, Shi Jin tightened his arms, buried his face in his shoulders, and whispered: "I'm sorry, I made you worry."
Lian Jun kissed him soothingly, silently comforting him.
"Not again in the future." Shi Jin rubbed his forehead against his shoulder, then stepped back slightly, looked up at him, forced a smile at him, and said, "You are the most important, you are my most precious baby."
"You use the wrong words again." Lian Jun also laughed, stretched out his hand and pulled his face, "Staying up late is a bad habit, I punish you to go to Gua Er for training, do you agree?" "
Agree!" Shi Jin nodded vigorously, hugged him again with the strength to embed him into his body, and repeated, "You are the most important, I will adjust myself well, and will not let you worry again." Even if it is just for this person, he will never allow himself to be invaded by those messy and inexplicable emotions again.
This time he really made a bad attempt.
As he thought about this, he unconsciously looked at the progress bar in his mind, but found that his progress bar had dropped to 60.
Dropped... He was slightly stunned, and then pursed his lips. So... is this the case?
He tightened his palms, tilted his head and pressed against Lian Jun's body, feeling his body temperature, and something in his heart that was only a vague guess before slowly became clear.
"Xiao Si." He whispered in his heart, not caring whether the other party would respond this time, and said in a firm tone, "This last fatal factor comes from myself, no, to be precise, it comes from the original owner, right? What a simple truth, what can kill a person, in addition to external dangers and enemies, is also the inner self."
This time Xiao Si finally stopped being silent, it whispered firmly: "Jin Jin, you will survive, and then live a very happy life."
"Of course I will survive." Shi Jin pressed all his body weight on Lian Jun, holding him so hard that he seemed to break him, "With Lian Jun here, no one can think of defeating me." Including myself.
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