The beautiful dream he had when his soul left the body, the small death defined Shi Jin's previous life.
Shi Jin suddenly felt a little confused. He remembered his adoptive parents, Jin Jin Supermarket, and the friends, classmates, comrades, and colleagues he had met since he was a child... Those people were so vivid, and the memories of living with them were so real. He had clearly lived such a life. How could it be a dream?
It was because he firmly believed that he was just a Shi Jin who grew up in an ordinary family and had the love of his parents, and believed that he was just a little unlucky, that he had to experience the life of others. Only then could he truly get rid of the dark and twisted emotions of the original owner and come to this point today.
If the root he relied on to support himself was just a dream, if he didn't come from that warm world, how should he deal with it?
"Xiao Si, you are lying to me." He said in a deep voice, implying a plea.
Xiao Si started to cry, and kept saying sorry.
Sorry, this is the word Shi Jin least wants to hear now. For the first time, without being intimate with Lian Jun, he ticked the progress bar and locked Xiao Si in the small dark room.
The world was quiet, the crying disappeared, he sat in a chair, his mind was confused, suddenly he didn't know who he was, and then soon, he came to a conclusion.
He is Shi Jin, the twisted and dark Shi Jin, the Shi Jin who went to another world in a despicable way and stole a life that did not belong to him. To his adoptive parents, he is an outsider who should not be there. The place he thought was his hometown and where he came from was actually a real foreign land.
What a terrible thing, the beauty he thought was was just a fantasy adventure carefully prepared for him by Xiaosi in order to change his real dark self.
In fact, he had guessed it, and he was not unprepared for the truth, but... it was so uncomfortable. He bent down and grabbed his face, and suddenly his mind flashed with those memories that he once firmly believed belonged to the original owner who had died, and his heart felt like it was about to explode.
That was the real him, that was his real life, he was actually such an ugly and sad person. He had been in a cage and hell since he was born, and all the beauty he had was an illusion woven by conspiracy nightmares, and his heart had long been rotten.
Fake, all fake. Beauty is fake, happiness is fake, everything is stolen by him, and it doesn't belong to him, he -
"@#￥%?"
A strange language with concern and worry suddenly rang in his ears, and then his shoulder was touched. Shi
Jin was stunned, and his thoughts that were stuck in a dead end suddenly turned around. He let go of his hand and looked at the foreign old man who was looking at him. Facing the other's eyes that were particularly quiet and gentle after years of sedimentation, his mind flashed, and it seemed that he saw his adoptive father who had the same eyes.
"Jinjin, Dad and Mom love you the most, so you have to love yourself well."
Before the old man died, he reluctantly told him so. He held the old man's hand, secretly hating the ruthlessness of time, but with a smile on his face, he said to the old man: "I will, Dad, don't worry."
"How can I be at ease?" The old man reached out and touched his head, with endless nostalgia and reluctance in his eyes, "You are always so good... Jinjin, Dad can't bear to leave you, you haven't really grown up yet."
"What are you talking about, old man?" His mother put her arm around his shoulders from behind, her usual sharp tone trembled a little because of her husband's impending departure, "Our family's Jinjin has long been a man of his own standing. Look at this police uniform, how handsome he is, old man, don't worry about him all the time."
Memories flooded in, and his emotions completely collapsed. Shi Jin stretched out his arms to hug the old man in front of him and cried like a child.
It's not a dream, they are his parents, his family. His father is always so gentle, his mother is always so caring, it's not a dream, they are where he comes from, his roots.
"@#￥%...&￥#?" The old man was startled and became more worried. He hesitated and raised his hands to hug him back. He also tilted his head to touch his cheek to see if he was sick.
The passengers around were also attracted by the movement here and looked over. Shi
Jin didn't care about that anymore. He hugged the old man and cried out all his grievances and reluctance.
...
In the evening, Shi Jin came out of the local police station with a pair of red and swollen eyes. He said goodbye to the kind old man and the police with an embarrassed face, raised his hand to take a taxi, and told the driver the address of the nursing home.
After crying for a while, being mistaken by a kind old man as a child who had lost his parents, and experiencing a series of events such as causing the tourist bus to stop, attracting the police and being sent to the police station, Shi Jin's pent-up emotions all dissipated, and he finally calmed down.
He rubbed his sour eyes, touched the ring on his finger, and released Xiao Si from the small dark room.
"Jinjin." Xiaosi called out immediately, carefully observing the surroundings. Seeing that everything was fine, he breathed a sigh of relief and asked cautiously with a suppressed cry, "Do you hate me? Jinjin, I'm sorry."
Hearing it cry, Shijin's heart softened instantly, but he still sternly said, "Don't say sorry again, otherwise I will really hate you."
Xiaosi immediately shut up, his tone became more cautious, and asked, "Then...then Jinjin, are you okay?"
"Oh no, I cried in front of strangers and was taken to the police station. This is definitely a dark history in my life." Shi Jin continued in a serious tone, "And I suspect it's all those rewards."
How could such a coincidence happen in the world? Just when he was about to go crazy, an old man with the same eyes as his adoptive father reached out to him and pulled him out of those thoughts. He was kind enough to accompany him and comfort him.
Maybe he was dark, anyway, he didn't think this damn world had been so gentle to him before! When he was in pain and wanted to cry before, there was never a hug for him to lean on!
What rewards?
Xiao Si was confused by his answer for a moment, and then he saw that his eyes were indeed red, obviously he had been crying, and he was instantly heartbroken. He no longer cared about the reward or anything like that, and carefully gave him the relief buff while saying, "It's all my fault, I'm sorry--" Shi Jin's
tone sank: "Huh?"
Xiao Si hurriedly stopped saying sorry halfway, and choked himself and hiccuped. While hiccuping, he said, "It's all my fault, Jin Jin, you can scold me, or continue to lock me up in the small dark room, I only ask you not to hate me... Don't be sad, it's all my fault, you still lock me up in the small dark room..."
“It doesn’t matter. We don’t have much time left to spend together.” Shi Jin’s heart softened completely. He no longer maintained a stern tone. He lowered his head and touched the ring again, then said slowly, “Xiao Si, I don’t hate you. You saved me and I’m grateful to you. You could have just given up on me. I was in such a bad situation in the past that I wasn’t worth saving at all, but you didn’t give up on me. You took the trouble to arrange everything for me, allowing me to see many beautiful things that I wouldn’t have been able to see otherwise… In fact, if you gave up on me and lived directly with Lian Jun, your mission to save the world would probably have been completed faster. I’m a burden to you. I’m sorry, and thank you.”
Xiao Si wanted to cry again because of what he said, and hurriedly said, “No, you’re my baby too, I won’t give up.” You, you didn’t drag me down either.”
Shi Jin’s eyebrows relaxed, he hummed softly, and was quiet for a while, then suddenly asked earnestly: “Xiao Si, my adoptive parents really exist, right?”
Xiao Si didn’t know why he asked that, and was afraid that he still had doubts, so he hurriedly explained: “Of course they exist. Although I immediately erased all traces of your existence in that world after your soul left that world, your adoptive parents really exist.”
When Shi Jin heard the words “erase all traces”, he felt uncomfortable for a moment, but he quickly adjusted himself and continued to ask: “So I really grew up again under my adoptive parents’ knees, right?”
Xiao Si’s tone became hesitant and he replied: “It’s true, although…”
"Don't say although!" Shi Jin quickly interrupted it, held the hand with the ring tightly, and said, "That's enough, I don't want to know anything else. It doesn't matter whether it's Zhuang Zhou Mengdie or Die Meng Zhuang Zhou. I just need to know that I have lived with my adoptive parents for so many years."
Xiao Si immediately understood his thoughts and felt more distressed. He hurriedly affirmed again: "Jin Jin, you are loved by your adoptive parents, there is no doubt about that." Shi
Jin's unwillingness, fear, uneasiness... and other emotions slowly sank in this affirmation. He looked at the lights of thousands of homes outside the window that were gradually lighting up, he let out a long breath, and suddenly said: "Xiao Si, give me back all my memories and feelings." Xiao Si
was stunned, then his tone suddenly became tense, and he stammered: "What, what?"
"Didn't you take away my feelings and memories, give them all back to me." Shi Jin said seriously, wanting to face everything seriously, "Although I know the original owner... knows all my past memories, and I have empathized with most of my emotions through dreams, but it is ultimately incomplete."
If Xiao Si had a dirty heart, then its current heartbeat speed would definitely have exceeded the limit that the human body can withstand. It was even a little scared and said, "Jinjin, you, you don't have to do this. When you meet Shi Weichong, you will naturally..."
"I don't want to recall my memories and emotions piece by piece. Give me the whole thing at once." Shi Jin was very persistent and even comforted it, "Don't worry, I know what I'm doing. I just want to find my complete self again."
Xiao Si stammered, "Jinjin, it will be very uncomfortable... It will be easier to accept fragmented memories. If you restore all of them at once, those memories and emotions that you had let go of before will probably be provoked and affected, and then flood again."
"It's okay." Shi Jin lowered his head and held the hand with the ring tightly, as if holding the person who could give him strength. "For the future, I should make sure that I am really different now than I was in the past. It doesn't matter if it reappears. At most, I can resolve the knot in my heart again. In this way, you can stay for a while longer, and I will make a profit. And I will be fine. With those rewards, I can't die now."
Xiao Si had no choice but to compromise and obey him.
The progress bar began to flash, and the fragments of memories that had been seen in his mind reappeared, intertwined, and slowly formed a complete life. Shi Jin closed his eyes and leaned on the back seat of the car, letting his consciousness walk into those memories.
...
When the sky was full of stars, the taxi stopped steadily at the gate of the sanatorium. Shi Jin opened his eyes, calmly paid the fare, thanked the driver, and got off the car with his backpack.
Xiao Si was so scared that he called out, "Jin, Jin, Jin..."
"Why are you panicking?" Shi Jin watched the taxi leave, turned to face the closed gate of the sanatorium, looked at the beautiful white dome buildings inside, and commented, "It's a good place. Lian Jun is really good at choosing."
The calmer he was, the more panicked Xiao Si became. His voice trembled and he said, "Jin, Jin, your progress bar, it's slowed down..."
It was really slowed down, and it had been slowed down for a while. There is nothing around Shi Jin that could be lethal, so the only reason why Shi Jin's progress bar slowed down is because of himself.
He wanted to die, or rather, he wanted to do something that would lead him to death.
Shi Jin was inevitably affected by those memories and emotions that had been deepened again.
"Don't be afraid, I know what's going on." Shi Jin soothed, threw his backpack on his back, took out his cell phone and called Shi Weichong.
A few minutes later, Shi Weichong ran to the gate breathlessly. He was wearing indoor slippers on his feet, a set of pajamas casually wrapped around his body, and his hair was wet, as if he had just rushed out of the shower.
"Xiao Jin, why are you here?" Shi Weichong opened the small door and came out, looking at Shi Jin. He wanted to get closer but hesitated, as if he suspected that he was hallucinating and was afraid that he would wake up if he got closer.
"Brother, I'm here to pick you up." Shi Jin looked at his expression, smiled at him, took the initiative to hug him, and patted his back, "I'm sorry to have made you wait for so long." After
feeling his body temperature, Shi Wei Chong finally felt a little bit of reality, and hurriedly hugged him back, with some surprise in his eyes, and said a little excitedly: "No, I'm sorry for you, Xiao Jin, you really came... Thank you for coming, I'm very happy." Shi
Jin listened to his incoherent words, his eyes dimmed for a moment, and soon smiled again, slightly broke away from his embrace, and said: "Brother, I've been sitting in the car all afternoon and haven't had dinner yet, I'm so hungry."
"You've been sitting in the car for the whole afternoon?" Shi Weichong frowned, looked at his face, saw that his eyes were red, his complexion was very bad, and he looked very listless, so he quickly grabbed his hand, turned around and walked towards the nursing home, and said, "It only takes three hours at most to get here from the airport, why did you sit in the car for the whole afternoon and get a black car? The security in Country D is actually not as good as it seems. You should have let me pick you up. When did you get off the plane? Did you only bring such a small amount of luggage? The temperature here is lower, are you cold?"
Shi Jin never knew that Shi Weichong could be so nagging. He looked at Shi Weichong holding his He held his hand and glanced at Shi Weichong's thin pajamas, remembering the scene when Shi Weichong held him and patiently taught him to ride a toy horse when he was a child. An expression of wanting to cry appeared on his face. He quickly turned his head and took a deep breath to suppress his emotions, then held his hand, and said with a smile: "Brother, look at what you are wearing. You should be cold."
Shi Weichong was stunned, and looked down at his pajamas. He felt embarrassed, turned his head and coughed, turned back to look at him and said: "I didn't notice... I'm sorry, I came out to see you dressed like this." Shi Jin
still smiled, and seeing his embarrassed look, he said it was okay in his heart.
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