My father is such a kind person, but he is not respected by others, and I am also ridiculed as a result.
I hate my father, yes, I hate that kind of weak kindness.
However, I cannot surpass my father because I am also too weak and dare not treat servants and civilians as arrogantly as those young ladies.
Why, even though our family is the master of the territory, we don’t get the corresponding respect and admiration?
I hate always having to smile at people, I hate being calculated against without any intention, and I am afraid of my own cowardice and timidity.
There is no other way. I want to have someone reliable to rely on, even if the other person is a thorn.
Of course I know Murphy is not a good person, he's even a little bad.
But this is exactly what I lack, and even what our family lacks, too weak and vulnerable.
If my father had a son-in-law like this, outsiders would probably have concerns.
So, I chose Murphy and indulged him in everything.
The strong mountain people will cultivate a gentle monarch, and the gentle peasants will believe in a tyrannical emperor. As long as the latter can lead them from being bullied by outsiders, they can tolerate the tyrant's evil deeds.
This is the reality, which makes people feel helpless.
Finally, I'm sorry, but I may not be able to visit you again for a long time.
I hope Gweil doesn't end up like me, making a helpless choice, and finds the perfect partner in her mind.]
On the back of the letter was written, 'Please burn it after reading it. I hope this will be a secret that only belongs to us.'
After burning the letter, I sat under the windowsill for a long time, thinking about many things, until it got dark.
Time passed, and I was already 16 years old. I had a beautiful appearance that surprised others, and it was time to talk about marriage.
My father began to look for a suitable marriage partner for me. His first target was naturally the extremely noble Pascal family, the Duke of Red Dragon.
Unfortunately, the sons of the Dragon of Doom are all engaged, and the youngest is more than five years older than me, so they naturally won't wait forever. The only ones left are the daughters, but since they are of the same sex, I can't consider them either.
Disappointed, my father began to set his sights on several famous earl families, and I also met several young masters from aristocratic families in the castle.
These processes were very secretive, and my father seemed not to want to attract the attention of outsiders because there were many competitors.
The process was going smoothly. He had already arranged a marriage with a certain earl because the young man fell in love with me at first sight.
But something unexpected happened. The conflict between the Pascal family and the royal family involved many southern nobles, and the earldom disappeared in the suppression.
It's like a carefully prepared product that has lost its due market and buyers, and is left as a waste in the hands.
After suffering a series of blows, my father was very depressed. At that time, the southern border was in chaos and there was no big family suitable for marriage.
For the next year or so, he drank to drown his sorrows, began to look for various lovers, and I continued to live in the tower.
One night, my father was drunk again. He walked down the castle corridor, muttering, and came to my room where I had just taken a bath and was sitting in front of the mirror.
"Lorisa..." He looked at me and called out this unfamiliar name.
My mother, Lolisa, was the eldest daughter of a prominent family, very beautiful. She was bewitched by my father in her youth and married him. Unfortunately, this marriage was not blessed by my grandfather's family, and the Wenlani family did not reap any benefits.
Looking at my father's confused eyes, I gradually realized that his lustful nature had come back again.
He didn't even let his daughter go? Although I thought so, I was not surprised at all. This is just the kind of person he is.
I poured tea on my father's face to wake him up, but for the first time he slapped me in anger, and I felt that my authority was being resisted.
He regretted it very much afterwards, because if I had been hit in the face, I would no longer be suitable to be sold.
There was a lull for a few days, and then he started to find a strict etiquette teacher to train me, hoping that I would obey him completely, while he and his mistress had fun in the castle.
I am actually happy to see this kind of situation because he won't come to me.
Things took a surprising turn, and our fiefdom finally rebelled.
In the chaos, I was taken by the servants to his bedroom, which was the deepest and safest place in the castle.
The air still lingered with the scent of perfume, an alluring incense. I wondered how many of these toys my father had bought at the alchemy workshop.
I listened to the constant sounds of fighting and flames coming from the outside world, but my heart was very calm, because I didn’t have much hope for the future. If I died here, it didn’t seem like a bad thing.
The door finally opened.
A burly man smashed it open with a huge axe and rushed in.
He laughed loudly at his father, grabbed him like a chicken, and chopped him down with an axe.
The blood splattered on my cheeks and dress, it was very warm, and the waves of fire and noise from the outside also came in.
At that moment I lost everyone I loved, but I was also free.
In the blinding darkness of the night, I was taken out of the castle by a few servants and hid in a corner of the city, only able to peek at the outside world from the corner of the window.
Shortly after nightfall, a group of red-clad cavalrymen rushed into the city, and the seemingly powerful warrior seemed to be gradually losing his strength.
'For freedom,' he seemed to shout, in a way that was difficult for me to understand.
Is freedom so precious? I don’t think so.
There are all kinds of birds in the world, some are beautiful, some are ugly, some are kind, and some are ferocious, but not every bird yearns for freedom.
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