Tears kept flowing out of the corners of Xie Tingyu's eyes, flowing down and soaking the pillow.
I can never wipe it all off.
His chest felt as if a piece was missing and it hurt violently.
He seemed to have returned to Yejia Village.
In February in Yejia Village, the ice and snow melted, the mountains and rivers became beautiful, the birds sang melodiously, and the loquat trees began to bear fruit. The bright yellow fruit was fleshy and juicy.
Xie Tingyu saw that he had bought a pound of loquats from the town. His wife had never eaten such delicious fruit before, and her eyes sparkled when she received the fruit.
She ate voraciously, and he frowned slightly, barely noticing.
After she finished eating, she covered her mouth and smiled shyly, fearing that he would dislike her rude eating habits.
"Brother Yu, isn't this the loquat mentioned in the Xiangjixuanzhi?"
"If I plant it into a tree, I will have loquats to eat every year."
He looked at the yellow peels on the table and thought of "Xiang Ji Xuan Zhi", which did not have a good implication.
"What's the point of planting this kind of tree? It's unlucky, just throw it away."
Xie Tingyu saw that he had thrown away the fruit cores she had saved without any hesitation, but Ye Qingshui picked them up lovingly, soaked them in lime water, and waited until a wet spring rain fell before planting the cores in the ground.
Her silly, stubborn and serious look moved Xie Tingyu.
He laughed at Ye Qingshui's stupidity and said, "That's not how you plant fruit seedlings. You can't grow loquats this way."
But Ye Qingshui still looks forward to the seeds sprouting every day.
The seeds did not sprout, but Xie Tingyu's results came out. Reporters from the provincial capital and county leaders came to Yejia Village one after another to visit him. At the same time, he also received bad news from the capital: his grandfather fell into the water and died, and his grandmother died of a heart attack.
Xie Tingyu read the telegram for a long time in despair. The accident came too suddenly, making him vaguely guess that things were not as simple as he thought. So he called his friends in the capital one by one, and his heart sank after hearing the results.
Xie Tingyu packed his clothes and admission letter with a heavy heart.
Ye Qingshui was still waiting in the yard for her loquat seedlings to sprout. Her naive and happy look made Xie Tingyu feel even more heavy-hearted.
Ye Qingshui asked him: "Brother Yu, when will you come back?"
Xie Tingyu did not answer her.
She sent him to the fork in the road at the entrance of the village where they were waiting for a bus. Green buds sprouted from the dead branches of spring, and early spring camellia flowers bloomed one after another. Dew on the grass soaked the shoes and pants of both of them.
The car took a long time to arrive, as if it was specially left for the couple who were about to part, leaving enough time.
Ye Qingshui picked a leaf and played a little tune with a smile on his face. It was "Butterfly Lovers".
The empty green mountains, reflected in her eyes, were as clear as a painting.
Xie Tingyu finally couldn't help but correct her, "This piece of music is not good, don't play it again in the future."
He played "Farewell" for her.
"Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, the grass is green and endless.
The evening wind blows the willows, the sound of the flute fades, and the setting sun is beyond the mountains. "
The sunset glowed over the tranquil pond and a crow flew on a branch and cawed twice.
Ye Qingshui's eyes were like a deep sea of stars, shining brightly. She squinted her eyes as she listened, with a pure and happy smile on her lips. For her, this farewell was just a temporary separation.
He is going to the north to study, and their lives will get better and better in the future.
But for Xie Tingyu, this farewell meant an uncertain future, and he didn't know what was waiting for him ahead.
"When will Brother Yu come back?"
Xie Tingyu didn't know how to respond and remained silent.
The sound of the car came from far away, reverberating back and forth in the empty mountains.
He continued to blow:
"Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, the grass is green and endless.
I ask you when you will return, and when you come back, don’t hesitate.”
Finally, Xie Tingyu gave the harmonica in his hand to Ye Qingshui. In her expectant eyes, he made a promise: "Wait for me to come back."
He remembered her sudden picky eating habit, "You should live a good life with your grandma and mother in the countryside, and eat on time."
Who knew that this time I would never come back.
The car that Xie Tingjue and Xie Tingyu were riding in lost control and rushed onto the railway tracks. Before it was about to hit the train, Xie Tingyu grabbed the steering wheel and the car suddenly turned around and hit a house on the side.
The driver died on the spot and Xie Tingyu was seriously injured.
On his deathbed, he thought of his wife who was waiting for his return in the countryside.
Xie Tingjue held his brother in his arms, running like a headless fly while yelling, "Where is the hospital! Hold on, Tingyu, what should I do?"
At that time, Xie Tingjue was just an honest and dull man who had just moved to the city from the countryside. He was so anxious that his eyes turned red.
Xie Tingyu told him weakly that this place was far from the hospital, so don't worry, just call a public phone and ask the hospital to send a car.
While waiting, Xie Tingyu's blood flowed, and with every inch that flowed, he missed her more.
Fortunately, she was not there, otherwise, seeing him like this, she would probably cry.
She was the kind of person who would be sad for a long time even if his thumb was cut.
He kept talking, "Brother, listen... the car's brakes are out of order, the driver has a problem, we are the only ones left in the Xie family, I can't do it anymore, you... have to live for me."
Xie Tingjue was so anxious that he yelled in a hoarse voice, "Don't f*cking say that!"
Xie Tingyu said: "There is a letter of introduction and an admission letter in my backpack. You can take them... to school."
When he was dying, Ye Qingshui's expectant eyes before they parted appeared before his eyes.
"Don't delay her... Tell her not to wait for me. It would be best if she remarries. I will leave the property under my name to her, and the money, the money to her as well..."
Xie Tingyu spoke a long speech, which was incoherent, but the word "she" was repeated so many times that even if Xie Tingjue didn't know who "she" was, he could guess it.
Xie Tingyu was so painful that he couldn't speak. The beautiful scenery of Yejia Village appeared in front of him. Before he left, Yejia Village was filled with the fragrance of tea. He still remembered her red nose and her reluctant eyes.
Every time he came back from the city, she would be waiting for him at the end. He would ride his bicycle with her back to Yejia Village. Along the way, there were birds singing and flowers blooming, and the scenery was full of spring.
But this time, she couldn't wait for him.
He thought of the short two years he had spent in the countryside. The memories were like fleeting glimpses. These ordinary and trivial things, which he thought he would not remember at the time, were actually remembered clearly.
If that silly girl knew that he was dead, she would probably be too sad to think about it.
Xie Tingyu will never meet someone who likes him so much in this life, and he...can't bear to see her sad.
Before he died, he said with difficulty: "Keep it a secret from her for me... After I die, bury me in Yejia Village. She will like it..."
Xie Tingyu's body gradually became colder, and he exhaled more than he inhaled.
Xie Tingjue couldn't hear his brother's voice, so he lowered his head and put his ear close to his mouth.
"She likes to eat loquats and planted one in front of my... grave."
On her deathbed, Xie Tingyu seemed to hear the sound of Ye Qingshui reciting a book. She had tried many times to recite the "Xiang Ji Xuan Zhi" but failed to memorize it.
At first, Ye Qingshui saved the seeds and wanted to plant them in the yard, but Xie Tingyu thought it was too unlucky and it was not a good idea to plant them.
But now I think about it, he was always too strict with her. It didn't matter if she couldn't recite the book. He could do everything she couldn't do. Loquat trees are unlucky, but what's the harm? If she likes it, she can plant one. It's a pity that Xie Tingyu will never have the chance to see the loquat seedlings in the yard bear fruit.
There is no chance to enjoy the cool air in the yard with her now that she is old.
"Plant me a...loquat tree."
She loves loquats so much, maybe one day when she passes by his grave, she will stop to pick one to taste.
If she didn't come, the greedy children in the village would pick it and eat it, year after year, and maybe... one day it would be delivered to her hands.
…
Xie Tingyu returned to Yejia Village and was buried on a warm hill.
From the high hills, he could see the beautiful Yejia Village. He often saw Ye Qingshui losing his appetite and unable to eat.
She went to work in the fields on an empty stomach. Xie Tingyu was so worried that he could not speak, and the saplings beside the tomb trembled and buzzed.
The spring rain was as soft as butter, and the roads on the ridges of the fields were slippery on rainy days. Ye Qingshui fell and fell on the side of the road, and no one found him for a long time.
Her pants were gradually stained red with blood, and blood flowed down her legs.
For the first time in his life, Xie Tingyu felt his heart sinking and at the same time, he was burning with anxiety. It was like the extremes of ice and fire.
It took a long time before someone found Ye Qingshui. Their child had been miscarried. He was more than three months old.
There was no chance to even open my eyes and take a look at the world.
Before Ye Qingshui had finished her confinement, she received the news of her divorce. She dragged her sick body and went on a long journey alone to the capital to look for her husband. Xie Tingyu knew the outcome of her trip, but was still heartbroken.
Sure enough, after she came back, she cried for several nights, locked herself in the room for the entire spring, and had a high fever in the summer, which made her brain confused and she developed bedsores all over her body.
She touched the harmonica he left behind, dismantled it piece by piece, and burned the books one by one.
"Why, do you want to lie to me like this?"
Xie Tingyu's heart seemed to be torn into pieces, and he was constantly burned by the flames of self-blame. He had no heart, but he still felt suffocated. Even his soul was aching.
How he wanted to walk over, hug her, kiss her, and tell her: "No, I love you."
"I married you, talked to you about Ялюблютебя, and secretly kept in my box the crickets you folded, your hairband, your hair that fell every morning, every test paper you wrote, and a poem about you..."
Xie Tingyu had a lot to say, but he never had the chance to say it again.
All his belongings were thrown away by her. Everyone in the village knew that she was abandoned by Xie, the educated youth from the capital. Poor her, her child was aborted, her body was completely ruined, and even the idle old widower in the village looked down on a woman like her.
In the autumn, Ye Qingshui recovered from his illness and left the village where rumors were flying.
She went to Guangzhou, entered a factory, worked day and night, and received a meager salary of 20 yuan a month. She lived in a shabby and short demolished house, and ate fast food for 50 cents a meal. She often forgot to eat because she was busy working. When she had unbearable abdominal pain, she squatted down and sweated profusely.
Xie Tingyu watched her suffer, he watched her body becoming increasingly dilapidated due to miscarriage, he watched her subconsciously reject suitors even when they had them, and no longer willing to accept new warmth.
He shed tears.
At that moment, Xie Tingyu finally realized that he would never be able to participate in her life again.
I know that I will always be just a bystander, and I can only watch her suffer and feel helpless but unable to do anything.
Understanding him was the heaviest hurt for her, but he had no chance to explain it to her, no way to hold her in his arms, coax her, kiss her, and cherish her.
But he never left.
He wanted to continue watching Ye Qingshui, watching her work with strength and optimism, watching her work hard and desperately, watching her walk a long way to eat in order to save a few cents, but send all the money she saved back to the countryside.
The poor Ye family finally built a cement-tiled house, which was grand and spacious, and Uncle Ye finally had a marriage partner.
Four years later, Xie Tingjue finally graduated and gradually began to support Ye Qingshui.
Ye Qingshui worked very hard, learned cooking from his master, traveled far and wide, drank dew and slept under bridges. He earned a huge fortune, but he was able to donate it in the blink of an eye.
The brilliance in her eyes became more and more dazzling, and life could no longer defeat her.
Finally, she chose to return to the village in glory to build roads and provide electricity.
It is another year of continuous spring rain. The ten-year-old loquat tree sucks the nectar of the earth, sprouts, blooms, and produces abundant fruits. The yellow fruits hang on the branches, and the flesh is thick and sweet.
During the Qingming Festival, after sweeping Grandma Ye's grave, Ye's mother was so tired that she couldn't even lift her waist.
Some child said, "This tree bears a lot of fruit."
Mother Ye sat down under the tree. She glanced at the overgrown grave and said, "Whose grave is this? It's so pitiful, the grass has grown so high."
"Shuiya, go and sweep."
As the sun rose higher, the tired Ye Qingshui sat down under a tree to enjoy the cool air, and picked a loquat to taste.
After many years, Ye Qingshui ate loquats again. Unlike the bag of early-ripening sour fruits she had eaten that year, this one was ripe, with sweet and rich juice, refreshing in the throat. Ye Qingshui squinted her eyes unconsciously as she tasted it.
After eating the loquats, Ye Qingshui began to sweep the tomb. The weeds in front of the tomb were half a person tall. After clearing the weeds, the tombstone hidden under the weeds looked solemn and majestic, different from the tombs in the village.
But it has no name.
When her hand touched the tombstone, the loquat tree hummed and dropped a few leaves. Water droplets were faintly seeping out of the tombstone.
Ye Qingshui murmured in surprise: "It seems that the tombstone is crying."
Mother Ye rested under the tree and sighed, "The fog in the mountains is too heavy today. No one has come to sweep this tomb for many years."
She picked a handful of loquats and started eating them. "Loquats are so sweet. Shuiya, please climb up the tree and pick more. Mother can't climb anymore."
"Okay, mother, please wait. I'll be back after I finish picking some grass." Ye Qingshui responded with a smile.
Xie Tingyu shed tears.
There is a loquat tree on my tomb. It was planted in the year I died. Now it has grown tall and majestic like a canopy.
More than ten years later, his wife came over to eat and was very happy.
I am very happy too.
…
Kyoto Union Hospital.
Ye Qingshui was so anxious that she almost cried. She kept asking the doctor, "His fingers moved and he kept crying. Why didn't he wake up?"
The doctor checked for a long time and found no signs of waking up, so he had to say, "I'm sorry."
The chances of a vegetative patient waking up are too low. After recording the data, the doctor sighed and left the ward.
Ye Qingshui leaned over the bed and sobbed.
After a while, the bed made a slight movement. Ye Qingshui raised her tearful eyes and vaguely saw the man on the bed, who slowly propped himself up and sat up.
He smiled at her with difficulty, his hoarse voice carrying an indescribable tenderness.
"Don't cry, it will hurt me if I see you."
Xie Tingyu endured the pain, smiled and hugged his wife in his arms, gently stroking her with his hands.
This time, he could finally hold her in his arms and no longer feel lonely.
This hug was full of substance. She lay in his arms, warm, soft, and full of flesh and blood. Their hearts were pressed against each other, and they could feel the rhythm of each other's lives.
He kissed his wife and said, "Why are you crying?"
"Don't cry anymore, okay?"
Xie Tingyu stared at Ye Qingshui. She had grown her hair long, her face was flushed with excitement, her eyes were unusually bright, her lips were unconsciously curved, she was full of energy, and her face showed a relief and satisfaction she had never felt before.
Xie Tingyu looked at her smile, and his heart, which had been suffocating with pain, gradually revived and warmed up inch by inch.
He curled his lips.
Xie Tingyu accompanied Ye Qingshui throughout her life. He watched her being bullied, suffered a lot, and shed tears throughout her life.
I never want her to shed tears again in this life.
She may never understand that every tear she shed would turn into a sharp blade and cut his heart into pieces.
Xie Tingyu didn’t understand why she ran to the train station in tears that New Year’s Day and cried so badly when she met her brother; why she said she wanted to give him a surprise after the college entrance examination; why she was unwilling to touch loquats even if she was greedy during pregnancy;
Xie Tingyu understood all these things that he didn't understand.
It turns out that in addition to this life, they have also had so many missed opportunities and regrets. They missed Chenchen and Guangguang, missed the opportunity to go to college, missed their elders and relatives, missed many happy and contented days, and missed the opportunity to understand each other's love...
They missed yesterday, missed the past, missed a lifetime, but fortunately after so many regrets, they can still have today. Xie Tingyu felt incomparable satisfaction, and he held his wife's hand.
"Water, Ялюблютебя."
"I like you."
Xie Tingyu said it many times, talking about all the belated confessions in his previous life, and every night when she cried and couldn't sleep, and he was anxious, but he could only repeat the words countless times in his heart.
Ye Qingshui hadn't recovered from the good news that her husband had woken up yet, but she was so shocked by this series of confessions that her mind went blank and she burst into laughter.
Her cheeks gradually turned red, and she covered his mouth to stop him from talking.
"Shut up, people are watching us!"
They are an old couple and even have two children. It's really embarrassing that the man still says these things.
But how could this be possible? Xie Tingyu finally had the chance to talk to her.
Human life is so short, and Xie Tingyu is so lucky that after missing Ye Qingshui for his whole life, he still has a chance to rekindle his relationship with her.
Xie Tingyu kissed her thumb and said, "We will be fine in the future. I still remember that I owe you a decent wedding."
Ye Qingshui let go of his hand and asked him to look at the position of his ring finger.
She smiled and said, "Just remember. I've been waiting for you for a long time. Spring break is over. Let's not miss the summer break."
Xie Tingyu looked down and saw that he was wearing a plain ring on his thumb. It was simple and elegant, with TYQS engraved on the ring. The plain ring reflected a warm and dazzling light under the faint sunlight.
It just so happens that I have been waiting for you for a long time.
Xie Tingyu said in his heart, "This time, I won't break my promise."
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