I finally understand what Fu Xi meant when he said he would take care of him. He's a fool. Even though he was setting up a formation and devising a plan, he still insisted on being at the forefront, blocking all those arrows.
I knew about him, but I never took care of him. Ever since Big Guy's tragic death, the sight of blood always makes my heart race. Besides, he never let anyone take care of him, and I was quite distant with him.
I didn't waste any energy on him, but the first thing he asked me when he saw me was about my wound.
It had long since healed, the scar still a stark reminder of its condition, though the piercing pain was gone. Occasionally, when he was busy with the army and overworked, it would throb with a dull ache. It was probably a chronic condition that would never fully heal. But such a trivial matter wasn't worth mentioning to him.
So I shook my head and glossed over it.
"Will you marry me?" he suddenly asked, turning his head to the side.
I was taken aback, not understanding why.
He explained with a smile, "With such an ugly scar, you must be terrified. Who else but me would dare to marry you?"
I almost threw that bowl of tea in his face.
Lately, he has become increasingly unruly. When we first met in front of the mourning hall, his politeness and sense of propriety were just a facade.
"Aren't you leaving yet? Can't wait any longer?" He propped his chin up, raised an eyebrow at me, and looked at me with a playful expression.
He grabbed something and threw it at his chest—a military treatise with its pages torn apart.
He frowned, and after a long while said, "So be it, it's not just empty talk after all."
He smoothed out the military treatise and placed it back on the corner of the table, nearly knocking over a teacup in the process. I rushed over and pressed it down to stop him. If the map on the table had gotten wet, I wonder whose fault it would have been. Fortunately, there wasn't a single water stain on the map, but something about it seemed to make me feel uneasy.
I turned the desk to his side; the light was a bit too bright, so I had to lean over to get a closer look.
"You can read maps?" He stepped aside, making room for me.
I shook my head. I couldn't look at it, but staring at the mountains drawn on the map, the densely marked valleys, I felt something was different. Something seemed to be missing, but the words stuck in my throat. This map was clearly very complete. The steep, continuous mountains, the only gap being at Biezhou.
Is there something wrong?
Yes, but I didn't know what it was. I got up; perhaps I was overthinking it. Such a detailed map, though small, marked every tiny undulation. Besides, it was a map from his general's tent; how could it be wrong?
"General!" The sound of swords clashing suddenly rang out.
He squinted at the soldiers rushing in, remaining unmoved: "What is it?" His tone was flat, as if it were nothing more than a breeze outside.
"The Guifang are launching a sneak attack! Our army is about to be scattered!"
He suddenly stood up and drew his long sword.
That sword had lost the sound and power of a dragon's roar.
Something seemed to flash through my mind.
He strode out, then suddenly turned around, grabbed me without a word, and before I could struggle, frowned and said in a low voice, "Come with me. I won't leave you alone in the camp again."
I was taken aback, but I didn't refuse.
Last time, I was alone in the mountain valley, and everyone thought I was safe, when the Ghost Fang people arrived. The wound on my back, left from that time, suddenly ached. To say I wasn't afraid would be a lie. The image of the big guy's blood-dripping body was still flashing before my eyes, his bladed whip still lashing at me, yet I was powerless to do anything. I never dared to imagine what would have happened if Ji Mo hadn't rushed in then—would I have died like the big guy?
The moment I stepped out of the camp, I was surrounded by screams, shouts, and the sound of collapsing walls, so sharp they pierced my eardrums. Suddenly, he pulled me close, pressing my face against his chest.
He knew I was afraid of blood. I didn't tell him anything, and he didn't tell me anything either, but he just knew, and he remembered it all the time.
"Line up! Stop the Gui Fang, don't let a single one escape!" He brandished his longsword and shouted the order, then grabbed me and leaped into the wind.
His voice was like a spell, working like magic. The panic just now seemed like a nightmare, and now that the dream was over, they were still an army even more valiant than the Ghost Fang.
I've seen him fight, and I've imagined what he would do in battle, but I've never been by his side during a time of war, nor have I ever ridden alongside him on horseback.
Ji Mo Dongli, this person always appears by my side when I need him most.
It was the same the day my father's body was transported back to the capital, the same when we stumbled back from the ancestral graves and temple, the same when I was almost burned to death on the fire, the same when I was imprisoned and whipped, and even today. I've never said a pitiful word to him, yet he always reaches out his hand. No matter how many times I refuse, he always reaches out that one last time, pulling me back at the most crucial moment.
I know that this gratitude will vanish completely by dawn.
He knows that I am cold-blooded.
"With me here, you're not allowed to be afraid." He continued talking to me, as if everything before him, the swords and spears, was insignificant. "That day you hid there and spied on me leading the troops, didn't that scare you away?"
He knows!
I sighed. He knew everything.
He was so focused at the time that he didn't even notice the gushing blood, but he knew I was watching him.
I'm watching him...
I was suddenly stunned.
The map! Something's missing from the map... I think I know!
I pushed his arm away, looked up at him, gave him a look, and quickly snatched the horse's head from his grasp. I shouldn't have lingered in the fight, shouldn't have been so fixated on this little commotion! I wonder if it's too late. Why didn't I think of that sooner!
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