Chapter 16 How painful it must be for her. Even so, you are not prepared...
Jiang Ziyi curled up into a small ball on the bed.
Gu Zhi pulled her into his arms and reached out to smooth her furrowed brows.
No matter what exactly happened to Jiang Ziyi, this is probably the real reason why she wants a divorce.
He should have noticed it earlier. He knew that Jiang Ziyi had been having nightmares.
On the first night of the show's recording, he heard her talking in her sleep.
Jiang Ziyi kept calling for his mother in his dream.
Lin Shuyao was an overly sensitive topic for her, so he just tried it out and then lightly brushed it aside.
What a dereliction of duty, he thought, no wonder Jiang Ziyi hasn’t completely trusted you yet.
He was overwhelmed by the joy of being in the same room with her again. He selfishly and shallowly coveted the moment of eye contact and finger intertwining, but missed her signal for help.
Gu Zhi thought for a moment and called Li Yanhui.
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In fact, Gu Zhi is not the performing genius that people say he is.
He is not so much an excellent actor as he is a good observer.
As a calm observer, he always catches the details of human behavior.
While others were still simply making simple judgments about a stranger's clothing and appearance, Gu Zhi was already able to notice his expression, tone and gait.
By combining these features, even if the imitation is a bit stiff, it can still be similar.
When Gu Zhi was very young, Li Aomei was worried that his personality was too cold.
When other children cried, little Gu Zhi would just stand by and watch with his chin in his hand, without blinking. He didn't understand why people would suddenly have such intense emotions.
If most people's emotions have a threshold, exceeding it will overflow, Gu Zhi does not seem to have such a critical point.
His innate restraint is like a bottomless valley; no matter what is thrown into it, no echo can be heard.
When he first met Jiang Ziyi, Gu Zhi was just observing her.
He was intrigued by her deliberately distant attitude, the vulnerability she tried so hard to conceal, and her sharp self-defense.
They live in two completely different worlds. The things that are as abundant and common as the air around him, such as the love of his parents, a wealthy family, and a good education... are scarce commodities to her.
But Jiang Ziyi was still able to live a good life. She could entertain herself under Lin Shuyao's morbid surveillance, get the role of a rich lady by wearing a cotton coat with torn threads and patches, and pass the exams despite missing most of the classes that semester.
Gu Zhi didn't know how she did it.
He decided to get closer to her and look more closely, until they were too close to observe each other any longer.
The curve of her eyelashes, the color of her eyes, the hollows at the corners of her mouth…became as clear as his heartbeat as he looked at her.
Shortly after Gu Zhi returned to China, he co-starred with Jiang Ziyi in a crime film.
Director David is obsessed with the aesthetics of violence. Jiang Ziyi plays a detective who is suspended for investigation, and he is a serial killer on the run.
She raided his apartment with a forged search warrant and violently forced him to confess in a blind spot of the surveillance camera. He was desperate and climbed over the rooftop, and the two confronted each other in a brightly lit area.
She grabbed his neck with one hand, and he removed her wrists without hesitation until the cold muzzle of the gun was against his jaw.
Jiang Ziyi read out the list of victims into his bleeding right ear, and the distance between them was closer than when they were kissing.
The director called a pause with satisfaction, and she let go of him uncomfortably, asking him if he was injured in the fight scene.
More than ten minutes later, Gu Zhi raised his face soaked in cold water in front of the mirror. He almost had a reaction just now.
The self-control that he was proud of was shattered by Jiang's unbridled breathing.
The once silent valley was filled with a deafening roar, and countless boulders rolled down in a never-ending rhythm.
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When Jiang Ziyi woke up again, it was already bright.
She turned over tiredly and closed her eyes again in the sunlight blocked by the curtains.
"Yiyi's psychological problems are much more serious than we thought," Li Yanhui hurriedly sat down at the head of the table, "Before she participated in the program, did she have a period of mood swings, hyperactivity and lack of sleep?"
"Yes, she gets easily emotional and doesn't go to bed until four or five in the morning, but she is in good spirits." Gu Zhi stared at the blank desk in front of him.
"Excuse me, what disease did Yi Yi have?" He tried to stay calm.
"Two months ago, Yiyi went to a psychological clinic alone. I found out a few days ago that she was taking new medication. I'm afraid she has made a self-diagnosis..."
"Bipolar disorder," Li Yanhui said softly, "It's a hereditary mental illness with a long incubation period."
"If we restore the timeline based on the existing information: Yi Yi was diagnosed two months ago, went through a period of manic depression, and began to turn to depression last night... I guess this is most likely the reason why she divorced you."
"Are there any bipolar patients among your immediate family members? They have mood swings that are very large in a short period of time, and have symptoms of both manic-depressive and depressive symptoms at the same time—"
"A willful mother may fit your description." Gu Zhi's expression was solemn.
From his perspective, the relationship between Lin Shuyao and Jiang Ziyi is extremely complicated, even incomprehensible.
When things are going well, Lin Shuyao is a gentle mother. She would spend the whole day taking Jiang Ziyi to the amusement park, preparing surprises for her one after another, and humming songs to lull her to sleep... But sometimes, Lin Shuyao seemed to have no daughter at all, leaving Jiang Ziyi alone on the set, forcing her to take a ride home and even lock her out of her own house...
In this regard, Lin Shuyao explained that if Jiang Ziyi behaved well, she would be a good mother; if Jiang Ziyi became a bad child, she would have to punish her.
But this is not Jiang Ziyi’s problem at all.
"I think Yi Yi decided to divorce you because she is aware of the pain that bipolar patients cause to the people around them," Li Yanhui said seriously.
"Then, out of respect for her choice, I must explain to you objectively:"
"In fact, the personality defect of 'avoidant attachment' alone is already very fatal to a relationship. People who have difficulty in giving trust, cannot devote themselves to love, and always escape when the relationship is about to take a step further will continue to hurt their partners."
"Bipolar disorder is much more terrible. She will switch between extreme excitement and extreme depression repeatedly, and it is more difficult to control herself. She may suddenly decide to move in the early morning of a certain day, take a lethal dose of sleeping pills without any warning, and point a knife at her wrist in the middle of a dinner party..."
"Gu Zhi, please think about it carefully. Even if this is the case, you are not going to break up with Jiang Ziyi, right?" Li Yan turned to him for confirmation.
"You mean, Yi Yi will have a tendency to self-harm or even commit suicide?" Gu Zhi's voice was terribly hoarse.
"Yes, it is difficult for ordinary people to take on such guardianship responsibilities. I need to emphasize again that this is an emergency..."
At this moment, there was only one thought in Gu Zhi's mind:
"How painful it would be for her." Just imagining that situation made him feel so heartbroken that he could hardly breathe.
"It seems that my worries are unnecessary," Li Yanhui showed her first smile since meeting Gu Zhi, "Next, let's talk about how to deal with it."
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