To say she doesn't resent it is impossible for Xiaohua to be completely without resentment. If it were the original Xiaohua, who was uneducated and illiterate, how could she possibly raise a child and survive outside? Let alone the child, she was afraid she wouldn't even be able to support herself.
Even now, despite her education and ability to earn money as a tutor, she still endures a lot of hardship and grievances while raising her child.
I remember the winter before last, she was rushing to class and was running out of time. In her haste to give her child some water, she got more and more flustered and didn't put the bottle cap on properly. Half the bottle of water spilled all over the child.
She knew the child would catch a cold if she didn't change his clothes in the dead of winter, so she had to change him quickly. The child cried his heart out and wouldn't cooperate. At that moment, she was really annoyed and yelled at the child, even hitting him. The child was so scared that he stopped crying, and his big, teary eyes revealed his fear.
At that moment, she hated He Yan as much as she hated herself. She slapped herself hard across the face several times as punishment for hitting and yelling at the child, telling herself that she must never treat the child like that again in this situation.
However, such things still happened again. Just before returning to her hometown, not long ago, she had taught several classes in a row and her voice was hoarse. Kang An kept pestering her to tell her a story, and she said to Kang An: "Mommy's throat is very uncomfortable, so I won't tell you a story today. Baby, go to sleep early, and Mommy will tell you a story tomorrow."
But Kang An insisted on talking to her. She tried to reason with him several times, but he still wouldn't listen. In a fit of anger, when Kang An started pestering her again, she pushed him. Kang An accidentally fell off the bed and hit the back of his head on the floor. Luckily, she had laid a carpet under the bed. If she hadn't, it's unimaginable whether Kang An would have suffered a head injury from that height.
Actually, this happens a lot. She always hits herself and reflects on her actions, but she still makes the same mistake again. It's because she has to earn money and take care of the child, which is too tiring. When your bad mood reaches its peak, the child's crying is just a spark that explodes!
Fortunately, life is getting better and better now, and resentment is naturally fading. So people have to live their lives well so that they can gradually let go of the hatred and resentment they used to have.
Although Mao Dani, Ye Dazhuang, and the Ye brothers said many unpleasant things to Commander He and He Yan, their attitude was surprisingly consistent with Commander He's: under no circumstances should Xiaohua and He Yan be allowed to divorce, especially in this era in the countryside, where divorce was an extremely disgraceful thing, something that would bring shame to one's ancestors. Only widowhood existed; divorce was simply out of the question.
However, Xiaohua's attitude was firm: this marriage must end in divorce.
He Yan's attitude was rather contradictory. He had no feelings for Xiao Hua. Even though Xiao Hua had lost weight and become youthful and beautiful, no longer looking as vulgar and crude as before, no feelings were no feelings. How could a marriage without feelings be maintained?
But considering that Xiaohua had given birth to her child, He Yan, being a responsible person, was less determined to divorce for the sake of the child.
Commander He told He Yan and Xiao Hua to have a good talk, and everyone else dispersed. He Yan followed Xiao Hua into her room.
The room was very simple, with only a large kang (heated brick bed) and no chairs. Xiao Hua sat on the kang, and He Yan stood not far from her.
He Yan looked at the woman in front of him who felt completely unfamiliar to him—no, the woman who might soon become his ex-wife. He really couldn't connect her with that fat, lazy, and vulgar Xiao Hua.
He Yan didn't know how to start the conversation. Xiao Hua didn't have a deep impression of He Yan, but she knew that he was a rather introverted person. To put it nicely, he was introverted; to put it bluntly, he was someone who couldn't say a word for a long time.
Xiaohua, growing impatient, spoke up: "Hurry up and get that agreement out for me to sign. You go and process it. We should have broken up three years ago. It's not too late to break up now."
Regarding divorce, He Yan is conflicted, wanting to divorce but also not wanting to divorce.
"You...have you thought it through?" He Yan seemed a little uneasy.
Xiao Hua sized up this man whose handsomeness was so outrageous it was almost infuriating. Putting aside his cruelty towards her and their child, just looking at his face, which seemed to have been meticulously sculpted by the goddess Nuwa, and his towering height of at least 1.87 meters, she honestly didn't want to divorce him.
But we're not people who only care about looks. Think about how cruel this scoundrel is to his wife and children. No matter how handsome he is, how great his physique is, or how good he is in bed, he's still a dog and scum, and we can't keep him!
Xiaohua nodded: "Of course, what's wrong with that?"
He Yan looked at Xiao Hua and saw that she didn't hesitate at all, so it seemed that she really agreed to the divorce.
"Then let's talk about the child. Since the child is mine, he will naturally come back to the He family with me and I will raise him..."
"Bullshit! That's my child, I gave birth to her and raised her to the age of three. She's only my child, He Yan, my child has nothing to do with you!"
Before He Yan could finish speaking, Xiao Hua interrupted him with a string of curses.
He Yan frowned as he watched the beautiful girl in front of him spew profanities at him. She had become thinner and prettier, but her vulgar temperament remained unchanged.
He Yan was the son of a high-ranking official, and the girls he was around were all from respectable families. He had never heard a second girl swear like that before.
"Ye Xiaohua, you're still as vulgar and uncouth as ever!" He Yan's tone was full of disdain.
Xiao Hua scoffed dismissively, "I'm just a peasant woman's daughter, illiterate and can't read a single word. How could I possibly know how to use such flowery language? If you want to curse, then curse. Why should I have to think about whether my curses are noble or not?"
When He Yan and Xiao Hua first got married, He Yan said in front of everyone that Xiao Hua was an illiterate farmer's daughter who didn't know a single character and that everyone should not take her seriously.
Xiaohua has remembered those words for a long time and hasn't forgotten them yet.
"You're trying to use the child to ask the He family for money, aren't you? Tell me, how much money do you want? It seems that 30,000 won't satisfy your appetite."
As He Yan spoke, he took out 30,000 yuan from his bag and threw it on Xiao Hua's kang (heated brick bed); "I can add more if you want!"
Xiao Hua glanced at the 30,000 yuan and clicked her tongue, saying, "Look, three years have passed, and the He family has finally become generous. They're willing to take out this 30,000 yuan. But you're right, 30,000 yuan won't satisfy my appetite, because my daughter is priceless to me!"
Looking at He Yan, Xiao Hua felt utterly disgusted. So what if he was handsome? He was a damn scumbag!
"If you don't want money, what do you want? Or do you not want a divorce at all? You still want to be He Yan's wife..."
"Ugh..." He Yan was interrupted by Xiao Hua's vomiting before he could finish speaking.
She looked at He Yan with disdain: "Brother, can we not be so confident? Stop overthinking. I just want to get a divorce from you. You are you, I am me, the child is mine alone, it has nothing to do with you, and I don't want a single penny from you!"
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