Chapter 76 I Want to Break Up with You
When Zhuang Wan entered the room, she saw Pei Xingju with a smile on his face. She didn't know what had happened to him so funny, but he seemed to be in a good mood.
"Yuzhi," Zhuang Wan walked over and called him sweetly, "What happened to you that makes you so happy?"
Pei Xingju raised his eyes and said with an ambiguous tone, "Interesting."
"Oh? What's that?"
"You want to hear it?"
He seemed to be smiling, his dark eyes seemed to see through people's hearts, with a bit of casual interest.
Zhuang Wan felt that this might not be a good thing, so she simply shook her head: "Forget it, I don't really need to hear it."
She pushed the food tray over and said, "Yuzhi, this is the sweet-scented osmanthus water chestnut cake I made for you. Try it."
"Alas!" she sighed suddenly, "Perhaps this is all I can do for you."
Pei Xingju raised his eyes and asked, "What do you mean?"
"You're going to the temporary palace soon. I heard you won't be back until the end of August. Once you go there, I won't be able to cook for you anymore."
"You're not going?"
"Of course I want to go, but I can't." Zhuang Wan looked lonely.
This is why she came here today.
She absolutely couldn't go to the palace. How could she leave after going there? Therefore, she had to rack her brains to act in front of Pei Xingju. She couldn't let him see that she didn't want to go, and she had to find a suitable and considerate reason to make him understand and agree.
She lowered her head and wiped her invisible tears with a handkerchief. "How can I, with my status, go with you? You are Pei Xingju, an important official of the court. My staying in your house these days has already caused you a lot of criticism. If I follow you to the palace, who knows what those people will say about you then."
"No problem." Pei Xingju leaned back lazily and glanced at her calmly.
"It's alright with you, but I can't bear it. If those people say something about me, that's fine, but I can't bear it if others say a word about you. So after thinking it over, I decided not to go to this palace."
"Yuzhi, can I wait for you at home?" Zhuang Wan looked at him hopefully.
She was affectionate, with an expression of reluctance yet understanding, and her fair little face was full of expression, without any flaws.
Pei Xingju admired it leisurely for a while, then the corners of his lips curled up slightly: "You really don't want to go with me?"
"It's not that I don't want to go with you, it's that I can't bear to see people talking about you."
"I said, I'm fine."
“…”
After enduring for a while, Zhuang Wan complained, "You're fine, but I am."
Pei Xingju narrowed his eyes and asked casually, "Tell me about it."
"You're not afraid of what others say, but I am. I'm afraid of what others say about you, and I'm also afraid of them laughing at me."
"You don't look like someone who's afraid."
“…”
Zhuang Wan was also aware of her reputation as a tough guy, and Pei Xingju found it difficult to convince her. Her mind raced, and she let out a long sigh.
"It seems that Yuzhi doesn't understand me. I act like that outside just to show off. My family is broken and if I hadn't done this, others would have bullied me. But I'm a girl after all, how could I really not care about gossip?"
Hearing this, the smile in Pei Xingju's eyes gradually faded.
Zhuang Wan continued, "My heart isn't made of stone. I know they ridicule and look down on me. I'm sad, too, but what else can I do? If I can't live anymore, will I hang myself again? But I won't do that. I still have my mother and my brother. I'm still young, and my body and hair are a gift from my parents. I can't make them sad."
"Although I'm constantly striving for self-improvement, that doesn't mean I don't care what others say. I can only try my best to ignore them. If I go with you to the palace, I'll have to face them every day. It would be better for me to stay at home and be happy."
After she finished speaking, she lowered her head, her long eyelashes drooped, and her lips were tightly pursed, looking extremely hurt.
Promise it, please agree to it! Zhuang Wan shouted in her heart!
She thought that these words were very sincere and she couldn't help being moved. She didn't believe that Pei Xingju was not moved at all.
However, it turned out that Pei Xingju's heart was made of coconut shell. After listening to this, he took a sip of tea slowly.
"In that case, I must take you with me."
“?” Zhuang Wan looked up.
Pei Xingju said slowly, "The world looks down on you, but I want to lift you up. If your heart wasn't made of stone, I would help you equip a suit of armor harder than stone and stronger than steel."
Zhuang Wan was dumbfounded: Are you serious?
But Pei Xingju looked really serious.
"Why, why?" Zhuang Wan asked weakly.
Pei Xingju said nothing, but smiled faintly and continued to read the verdict: "You don't need to say more about this matter. Since you want to go, don't worry about anything else, just go."
Zhuang Wan wanted to cry! She really didn't want to go!
"Yuzhi, I don't want to go. Besides the reasons mentioned above, there's actually... there's something else that bothers me."
"What?"
Zhuang Wan thought for a moment, then closed her eyes and made up her mind: "I want to break up with you."
Pei Xingju paused: "What do you mean...breaking up?"
"I want to break up with you," Zhuang Wan said. "I don't want to continue living with you in this ambiguous relationship."
She continued, "You once said you wouldn't marry me. If that's the case, why should I stay here? It's delaying you and me."
"So..." Pei Xingju slowly raised his head: "You want to leave? But that's not what you said before."
He lowered his eyelashes slightly, his gaze thin and dangerous: "The other day at the Zhuang Mansion, did you forget so quickly what you said?"
Zhuang Wan's scalp tingled.
I haven't forgotten that she said anyone could leave him, except her.
But now...
Zhuang Wan regretted her careless words, and now her face was swollen.
Her face was swollen, and she said stubbornly: "I did say it, but it was said on impulse, I..."
Seeing Pei Xingju's face gradually darken, Zhuang Wan subconsciously shut up.
She didn't know if it was her illusion, but Pei Xingju at this moment had a murderous look in him.
She seemed to... piss him off.
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