36. Come back with me when you're eighteen.
There are countless flights from Guatemala City back to the US, taking eight hours, and then flying east from Seattle for a full twelve hours. My bones were about to fall apart before I finally arrived home.
He took a quick shower, collapsed onto the bed, and instantly fell asleep. When he awoke, he was momentarily disoriented, unsure of the time. He heard children crying and bouncing a ball, along with the sounds of parents scolding him, coming from the neighbor's house. The noise that used to infuriate Fang Kaixuan, making him pound on the wall, suddenly felt comforting.
She drew back the curtains and saw that it was already dusk. Suddenly, she felt extremely hungry. The airplane food was really tasteless, and she had barely eaten anything.
Fang Kaixuan asked Xiao Ju pitifully, "Is there any food to eat?"
"You're back! If I hadn't heard from you by now, I would have called the police."
I ordered congee and raw marinated food from a nearby Chaoshan congee shop, and the delivery arrived at the same time as my tangerine.
Upon seeing Fang Kaixuan, Xiao Ju exclaimed in surprise, "Why do you look like a wild man?"
These days, Fang Kaixuan is outdoors every day, either on the mountain or by the water. Although she applied sunscreen, she couldn't withstand the extremely strong sunlight. Her nose peeled, her cheeks were slightly red, and her bra marks were visible on the back of her neck and both shoulders.
She didn't notice anything unusual at the time, but now that she's in front of the mirror and looking at herself closely, she really does look like a scruffy dog.
It's okay to be a little rough around the edges in the mountains, but when you return to the city, it's like a stray dog or cat suddenly wandering into a petting zoo.
Fang Kaixuan could only shrug: "I'm exhausted from flying, how can I be radiant? Unfortunately, I'm just an ordinary girl."
Seeing that she looked calm and hadn't cried, Xiao Ju tentatively asked, "Did everything go smoothly?"
"Let's eat first, okay? I'm really starving." Fang Kaixuan didn't answer. Seeing her calm expression, Xiaoju guessed that nothing sad had happened on the journey, otherwise Fang Kaixuan would have come crying to her long ago. She had been away for three weeks this time, and apart from letting everyone know she was safe, she hadn't sent many messages.
It was unusually quiet.
"You seem to have lost a lot of weight."
Fang Kaixuan wolfed down his food, saying, "I'm exercising too much, and the food is too simple."
"What kind of sport? Hahaha."
"You're such a vulgar woman."
Once he was completely full, Fang Kaixuan seemed to regain his senses and said earnestly to Xiao Ju, "It was hard work, but I'm happy."
"I didn't expect him to pass the test."
"What kind of test?"
Xiao Ju held her hand: "Kai Xuan, to be fair, you haven't been an easy person to get along with in the past year or two. You're even more difficult to deal with than a hedgehog. I didn't expect you two to get along peacefully for so long."
Fang Kaixuan lowered his head, deeply saddened: "We are doing well. But things in this world are never that easy, and fate doesn't allow people to be happy so easily."
"If you ask me, you've only been bitten once. Don't be so paranoid, just enjoy yourself first."
Fang Kaixuan smiled and changed the subject: "What are your thoughts on work?"
Xiao Ju has decided to switch careers and join that new energy vehicle company. This company is currently expanding into overseas markets, and its overseas branches alone have hundreds of employees, grouped by continent and key countries.
"After the training, once the probationary period is over, I might be sent abroad," Xiaoju said.
Where to?
"Who knows. The first time will most likely be in a remote and boring place."
"How could so much have happened in just a few weeks?" Fang Kaixuan suddenly realized that the perception of time was very different in the mountains and in the city.
"Life has to go on, and the mortgage is draining my cash flow, so I have to accept it. But I'm also a little excited, after all, it's a new life."
"Can you handle office politics?" Fang Kaixuan knew that although Xiao Ju was the stronger one among the two of them, she had no experience in the workplace and was still a naive girl, so she was bound to stumble.
"What are you saying? I just don't like all that nonsense, I'm not stupid," Xiao Ju said, displeased. "I'm a little worried about your mental state."
"Do I look particularly haggard?" Fang Kaixuan couldn't help but touch his face, wanting to look in the mirror again.
"No, no. It's too calm, too calm for someone who has just separated from their lover. If you were crying, I would be more at ease."
"You haven't broken up, why are you crying?"
"So what are the next steps?"
“It’s not time to think about ‘what’s next’ yet. We’ve always just met by chance, and at most we’re in a long-distance relationship. Do you expect me to give up everything to come here, or should I rush to him regardless of everything?” Fang Kaixuan couldn’t tell Xiaoju what had happened. Her friend would only think that she was too traumatized and was hallucinating, and might immediately take her to the Sixth Affiliated Hospital of Peking University.
Therefore, she simply used the excuse of being in a different location.
"That's true, but you don't believe that adult men would engage in platonic long-distance relationships, do you?"
Fang Kaixuan didn't answer. Actually, she didn't know either.
***
Things are different now. In terms of appearance, nothing has changed; she still looks like the kind of woman you could see anywhere in this city of millions.
But she felt calm inside.
Colleagues and friends are still full of energy, discussing who has moved to a large apartment in the inner ring road, or how someone was extremely lucky and was originally laid off due to poor performance, but ended up in an inconspicuous startup, but suddenly became a pig on the wind and soared to the top.
Fang Kaixuan greatly admired their vibrant lives, but declined to comment.
Her life's ambitions no longer lie in this.
Xiao Ju had already gone to her new company, and only then did she understand what Qi Chun had said: No matter how much the media industry declines, it's still an ivory tower, a utopia, a paradise. The unspeakable trivialities, inefficiencies, and rumors within large corporations are what truly drain people.
A Spring Festival passed in between. Fang Kaixuan was mentally prepared to endure her parents' incessant complaints about her impulsive divorce. Her ability to endure had improved; she no longer argued, but simply listened quietly. Seeing this, her parents let it go, and surprisingly, they didn't quarrel, thus enjoying a peaceful Spring Festival. On New Year's Eve, a table full of dishes under the bright lights of the dining room symbolized their formal reconciliation. She accompanied her parents to the supermarket and the park, behaving very well.
After the fifth day of the Lunar New Year, the perfect daughter finished her family visit.
On the high-speed train back, she finally breathed a sigh of relief. As the scenery flashed by outside the window, a wave of tenderness welled up inside her. The last New Year's Eve was when she first met Gu Qiye, and she had been so bold as to go to a cabin in the mountains with a strange man.
That night, they were alone together, and nothing happened.
These strange and unbelievable things are a story unique to them.
Arriving in Beijing late at night, the streets were empty and there were very few vehicles. It was the quietest time of the year, with only the lanterns and colorful lights on the roadside trees proclaiming the unique flavor of the Spring Festival.
She changed the scent of her home to a new fragrance, a scent of grass after rain. She loves this damp smell, from candles to perfumes, she's never tired of it, and it's always the scent of grass.
At the airport, she wanted to buy him a grassy-scented perfume. He was such a handsome man, yet he only used the most ordinary, inexpensive rollerball perfume—the kind you can just buy at a supermarket. But she couldn't find it anywhere in the airport. He promised to find a perfume with the same scent.
It shouldn't be difficult. Since many flowers and plants had become extinct by then, fragrances were all artificially produced, perfectly mimicking all the subtle smells that humans could detect. Naturally, one could easily ask to buy a bottle of "fragrance that smells like freshly mowed lawn."
It's almost a perfect replica, enough to fool olfactory cells.
“But nothing compares to the feeling of standing on a real lawn,” he sighed, “and the cool breeze on your face.”
No wonder you're so hungry and thirsty, and you only want to stay outdoors every day.
"This kind of luck is not something everyone has; those who haven't experienced it won't understand. I must cherish it."
For example, love.
No matter how clear-headed and carefree you are beforehand, you still can't help but shed tears when you say goodbye.
Although this was only a temporary separation, as he needed to return to his unit to finish the work that had piled up during his vacation, Fang Kaixuan's feelings were completely different depending on whether he knew about that incident or not.
Leaning on his shoulder, Fang Kaixuan said, "We don't want to stay here. Come back with me when we were eighteen. Don't let fate find us."
"What's this?"
"An article by an author I admire, titled 'Meeting on a Summer Afternoon in a Foreign Land.' I know this is narcissistic, thinking that if someone's story is so beautiful, it could also be about us."
"What book is this? I can find it and read it."
"Let's take a walk together."
After the words were spoken, both of them fell silent.
Their somewhat strange story began with a walk.
"We first met here, which opened the curtain on our mutual affection."
Now, that grassy fragrance brings a touch of nature to Fang Kaixuan's home. Even though she doesn't work, she still gets up very early. Her office career has long since trained her to have the metabolic rhythm best suited to a nine-to-five job.
The feeling of suddenly being thrown off the social clock is also strange. Even if you thought you had figured it out long ago, you will still feel a little bewildered.
This industry was probably too hot and there was too much money. Where there is a lot of money, there are bound to be crowds, and the smartest and most ambitious people flock there. The lucky ones among these people are all arrogant and think that they will be financially free before they are forty or even thirty-five years old, and that the world will surely send them on that glittering road.
So no one understands why someone would step out of this golden spiral and willingly become a useless person.
For example, Fang Kaixuan.
At first, people would often invite her out for meals or coffee, saying they hadn't seen her in a long time and wanted to catch up. But once they met, they would subtly probe for information: how were you making a living these days, and what important secrets were you working on?
Some people even asked her to recommend them to Boss Shen if they wanted to switch jobs.
"These people are really boring," Fang Kaixuan complained to Qin Zhisheng.
Qin Zhisheng has now settled down in Hong Kong and is so happy that he doesn't want to go back home. This trip to Beijing is just a business trip. He came to visit his old partner during a break in the meeting: "But let's not talk about them. I also don't understand. You are one of the hardest-working people among us. Is it really too early for you to just give up completely?"
“You don’t understand. Lately, I just feel old. Soon I’ll be sixty, eighty, and old and frail. Why waste my life in the office?” She covered her face with her hands, blocking the sunlight filtering through the branches, not wanting him to see her strange expression.
Qin Zhisheng, always sharp-tongued, didn't tolerate her tendency to be melodramatic. He slapped her hand away, saying, "Others have elderly parents and young children to support, yet they still manage. You can only be so carefree because you're single. Stop playing the victim."
At this point, Qin Zhisheng recalled the male companion who had been with Fang Kaixuan last time: "Where did the new man go?"
"He'll be coming next month."
"Long-distance relationship? Why make things difficult for yourself when you're dating someone?" Seeing Fang Kaixuan's expression, Qin Zhisheng knew she wasn't just playing around, but he still couldn't help being cheeky. "Alright, it's fine, Miss Fang, we won't lose out anyway."
As Qin Zhisheng rushed off to his next meeting and waved goodbye, Fang Kaixuan noticed his fingers unconsciously tapping under the table, calculating the date of his next meeting with Gu Qiye. When there was no anticipation, it was alright. But with the date approaching, time seemed to drag on endlessly. It wasn't that time flew by; Fang Kaixuan simply felt each day was incredibly long.
Only Xiao Ju would occasionally send out SOS messages, temporarily breaking her usual quiet routine.
Xiao Ju was originally someone who valued a healthy lifestyle, running, hiking, and eating healthy meals. Aside from beer, she never touched any other alcoholic beverages. But this time, Xiao Ju sat down and yelled, "Ah Xuan, give me a Long Island Iced Tea! We're not leaving until we're drunk!"
"Wait, wait," Fang Kaixuan hurriedly called out, and said to Ah Xuan, "Just give her Gin and Tonic, and less Gin."
Long Island Iced Tea is too strong; Little Orange definitely can't handle it.
“Now I understand the tone you used to use when you talked about the office.” Xiao Ju curled up on the sofa, looking as small as a child. “It’s not that there are any big problems or bad people involved. But every single thing is really like a thorn in my side, a fishbone stuck in my throat, and I don’t even know where to begin complaining.”
It's like having a pebble in your shoe; others may see you as calm and collected, but only you know what it really feels like.
But that's okay. Fang Kaixuan knew that Xiao Ju was smart and would learn quickly; before long, she would also be a shrewd and capable professional.
The two drank until very late that day; talking freely with a close friend is something that makes you lose track of time. The only secret Fang Kaixuan didn't tell Xiao Ju was about Gu Qiye.
Not just Xiao Ju, but of course, she couldn't bring herself to talk to anyone.
Perhaps it can be told later. Perhaps the time will come. Or perhaps it will forever remain her secret.
///
The layers of emotions, parallel to the real world, suddenly feel so much richer! Don't be sad, I'll update later (a very arrogant statement).
Sanggan...
Don't be sad, don't be sad
I almost had to urge them to update!
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