Chapter 23 Episode 1, Bai Yueguang returns to China! That’s it…
During Zheng Yi's fourth year in Spain, the apartment building was hosting a cosplay graduation party, and they specifically asked that families be allowed.
The classmate winked and said in broken Chinese: "Zheng Yi, can your sister come?" The other two classmates also joined in the fun.
Zheng Yi had been here for almost seven years. Everyone knew Jiang Haoxiang, but no one had ever seen her in person. Over time, everyone began to wonder if he had made this girl up. Or perhaps she wasn't interested in Zheng Yi at all, and Zheng Yi was just being lustful and fantasizing about her.
"Zheng Yi, seriously, if we don't see Jiang Haoxiang again this time, we'll have to assume you're not in a relationship at all, or that someone dumped you."
Zheng Yi shook his hand away: "Get lost. We are fine."
Having said that, he still made a video call to Jiang Haoxiang that night.
When the call came through, Jiang Haoxiang was hanging out with her college roommates outside. "What are you doing?"
Zheng Yi looked at her, the words on the tip of his tongue suddenly faltering: "We're having a graduation prom in our building, and families are welcome."
"so?"
"So, do you want to come to Spain for a few days in advance? It's during summer vacation." Jiang Haoxiang had originally agreed to let him come for the graduation ceremony, but the graduation ball was about half a month before the ceremony.
Jiang Haoxiang looked at him seriously: "When?"
Zheng Yi quickly said, "At the end of this month."
Jiang Hao thought about it for a moment, then suddenly asked, "Then can you cosplay as Dada Monster?"
Zheng Yi touched his head, speechless...
Dada monster. His childhood nightmare.
When Jiang Haoxiang was little, he'd watch Ultraman with him. The black and white striped monster, with its ability to turn invisible and teleport, and its three faces, had left a lasting impression on him. But Jiang Haoxiang was particularly fond of it, and he'd get excited every time he saw Dada.
He tried to struggle: "Why Dada? There are so many handsome characters in Ultraman."
"Because Dada is the cutest. If you cosplay as Dada, I'll go. If you don't, I won't go."
Zheng Yi didn't hesitate at all: "Okay. Is it okay for me to cosplay?"
After hanging up the phone, Zheng Yi stared at the computer screen in a daze, then resignedly began to search for Dada Monster's cosplay costume.
The day before the ball, Jiang Haoxiang arrived in Barcelona. Zheng Yi went to the airport to pick her up, mentally preparing herself for the trip.
"I'm telling you, if my classmates say anything weird, ignore them."
Jiang Hao felt absent-minded. He felt a little sleepy and dizzy. He had been flying for too long, and his energy was drained.
When I arrived at the apartment, all my classmates were there.
"Sister! Finally! Really!"
"God, you actually have a girlfriend. I thought you were just talking to yourself in your weekly videos."
Zheng Yi wanted to sew these people's mouths shut. Fortunately, Jiang Hao didn't seem to mind. She greeted everyone, obediently shaking hands and giving hugs.
"Where's Dada's suit? Let me see it." Jiang Haoxiang asked the first question after closing the door. He was full of energy again, his eyes wide open like a little animal.
Zheng Yi pointed to the top of the wardrobe: "There." After she received it, she opened it and took a look. Her eyes went dark and she stuffed it directly on the top. Out of sight, out of mind.
Jiang Hao wanted to step on the chair to get it. Zheng Yi quickly carried her down: "Ancestor, we'll see tomorrow. Let's take you to eat first."
After returning to the apartment after dinner, Jiang Haoxiang couldn't wait to open the express box. Inside was a black and white striped monster costume and a mask that could switch between three faces.
"You're going to wear this tomorrow?"
Zheng Yisheng nodded helplessly.
The next night, two hours before the ball, Zheng Yi was forced to wear the costume. Jiang Haoxiang wore the princess dress Zheng Yi bought for her.
As she adjusted the hem of her skirt, she complained, "This skirt is too expensive. It would be a waste to wear it once and never again."
"It's not a pity, I just enjoy seeing you wear it. If you don't wear it, I won't cosplay Dada."
The princess walked into the ball with the Dada monster -
"What shape is this? Is this a dinosaur?" Zheng Yi's classmate asked.
"It's Dada Monster." Jiang Hao wanted to correct Zheng Yi's classmate, "It's from Ultraman."
The classmate suddenly realized: "That one is ugly!"
Zheng Yi really wanted to punch him!
Throughout the entire dance, Zheng Yi's face was never shown. Jiang Hao seemed to be having a blast. She wore a beautiful princess dress, twirling her Dada monster around and around. Later, looking at the photos, they were almost all of her with different people, with Zheng Yi occasionally appearing beside her—a look so unsettling that many people would crop him out of the group photos they shared.
…
After the dance, Jiang Haoxiang stayed in Spain for another two weeks. During this time, she stayed at Zheng Yi's apartment. One day, while helping Zheng Yi organize her wardrobe and pack her luggage, she found some familiar clothes: a sweatshirt she had been looking for, a jacket she thought she had lost, and a few short-sleeved shirts.
——No wonder I couldn’t find it no matter how hard I tried! Jiang Hao was so angry that he almost died.
She rushed over with the clothes in her hand: "Zheng Yi, why did you steal my clothes? I've been looking for them for years!"
Zheng Yi was lying on the couch playing a game when his hand shook and his character died. He rubbed his head and made some grunts, trying to get over it, but Jiang Haoxiang stood in front of him, looking down at him and looking angry! Zheng Yi had no choice but to gently pat Jiang Haoxiang's calf, hold her ankle, look up at her, and say with a pitiful look, "Maybe I pretended wrongly."
"Pretended it wrongly? How could you pretend it wrongly?" Jiang Haoxiang insisted.
Zheng Yi put down the game controller, stood up and hugged her in his arms: "I'll compensate you, compensate you, isn't that enough? I'll buy you a hundred pieces tomorrow. I was wrong, I was wrong."
Jiang Hao wanted to say something, but Zheng Yi had already bent down and kissed her. The kiss was very gentle, with a little flattery, and Jiang Hao seemed to have forgotten what she was going to say.
On the weekend, Zheng Yi's Chinese friends came to the apartment for a party. They gathered together to play poker, and Zheng Yi insisted on pushing Jiang Haoxiang to the front.
He was very proud: "Let my girlfriend come. She is very smart."
Jiang Haoxiang blushed a little when she heard the word "girlfriend". Although they had been in a relationship for almost a year, Zheng Yi rarely called her that.
The two of them were simply too familiar. They had known each other since Jiang Haoxiang was born, their entire lives intertwined. Normally, they called each other brother and sister, treating each other as if they were family. Now their identities had changed, yet it felt like nothing had changed, nothing had changed, and yet something had indeed changed. With the word "girlfriend" uttered, Jiang Haoxiang felt as if Zheng Yi had truly acquired a gender.
Zheng Yi wasn't exaggerating. Jiang Haoxiang was indeed a skilled card player, having won quite a bit over the past few rounds. Zheng Yi beamed beside him, even happier than if he had won himself.
After the card game, Zheng Yi went to the kitchen to make Jiang Haoxiang some steamed egg custard. He searched for it for a long time and said regretfully, "We're out of sesame oil."
The steamed egg custard was tender and smooth, and Jiang Haoxiang put down his spoon after eating half of it.
"Not tasty?" Zheng Yi asked.
"No," she shook her head, "I just can't eat anymore."
Zheng Yi took the bowl and finished the rest of her egg custard.
That night, the two of them huddled together on the sofa and watched cartoons. This time, they were watching The Burial of Frielian, which Zheng Yi had requested.
"Why do you suddenly want to watch this?" Jiang Hao wanted to ask.
Zheng Yi was vague: "I heard it looks very nice."
Zheng Yi had seen it on An Fengyang’s social media, where he had posted a status: “Thanks for recommending it to me, it’s great.” The accompanying picture was this animation.
He wanted to watch it, too. Not only that, he wanted to watch it with Jiang Haoxiang.
Watching the animation, although Zheng Yi is not as sensitive as Jiang Haoxiang, he can still feel some emotions from this work. While peeling an orange for Jiang Haoxiang, he suddenly said: "I am really lucky."
Jiang Hao wanted to turn around and look at him.
"I felt love, I felt the love of the person I loved. And the person is still there, and the love is still there."
Jiang Haoxiang was about to comfort him, but Zheng Yi changed the subject: "Jiang Haoxiang, this is why I must return to China."
After saying that, he stuffed a slice of orange into Jiang Haoxiang's mouth.
Jiang Haoxiang had once urged him to stay abroad for his career, after all, having studied here for so many years, his connections and resources were all there. But Zheng Yi refused without a second thought. The three-year time difference between them was too long, and he wouldn't allow his love to be affected by another time difference.
The pervasive fragrance of oranges soothes the nerves. There's a trend online about taking an orange into the shower, peeling and eating it like a monkey in the rising steam, and finding bliss. The circumstances weren't right, the scene wasn't right, and even the orange wasn't the optimal solution, but Jiang Haoxiang still felt happy. Precocious, she had long suspected that happiness was an illusion—like eating an orange in the bath, the bliss you felt was a hallucination. After finishing the orange and leaving the bathroom, you still had to face the realities of life.
The premature insight made Jiang Hao want to live too smart, but she didn't dare to take it too seriously. She couldn't cast her eyes on the fantasy world - just like she hadn't made a wish for many years.
But now the scent of oranges spreads, and every aromatic factor swims into her memory, soothing the anchors that were laid down at the beginning one by one, and heading towards her past and future.
But do you believe it? There aren't that many truths in the world.
Because everyone is pretending, even the truth is a lie. Pretending to love, pretending to hate, pretending to desperately live, pretending to want to die, pretending to be good, pretending to be evil, pretending to be worthy, pretending to be unworthy... All pretense is nothing but an illusion. So why not enter the illusion you need?
You are the truth itself, you are the illusion itself.
——
Xiang Licai came the day before taking graduation photos.
The price Zheng Yi paid to persuade Xiang Li to attend graduation was clearly not as high as the one Jiang Hao had paid to persuade him to come. Or perhaps Xiang Li paid a higher price—the last time she returned to China, Zheng Yi had pestered Xiang Li to come to the graduation ceremony, giving her back and shoulder massages that made Xiang Li grit his teeth and tell him to get away: "It hurts!"
On graduation day, the sun was shining brightly. Zheng Yi, dressed in his bachelor's gown, held Xiang Li in one arm and Jiang Haoxiang in the other. The moment the shutter clicked, he quickly tilted his head and kissed Jiang Haoxiang on the cheek.
After the photo was taken, Zheng Yi remained in that pose. The sun shone on him, and he suddenly felt unreal happiness. To gain a sense of reality, he lowered his head and said to Jiang Hao, "Why don't you just curse at me?"
Jiang Hao was puzzled: "Are you sick?"
Zheng Yi smiled. Yes, it's true.
That night, Zheng Yi was packing his belongings in his apartment. Jiang Hao wanted to help him unpack the books from the shelf one by one. Between several architecture textbooks, she found a dozen sketchbooks. She opened them and saw that they were all filled with her portraits.
"When did you draw this?" she asked.
Zheng Yi glanced back and said, "When I miss you, I draw a picture."
Jiang Haoxiang flipped through the books one by one. They were all of her, all kinds of her. Pretty, cute, embarrassing, sad, proud, angry... She remembered what Zheng Yi had said, "If only you could see yourself as I see you." Now I seem to see it - Jiang Haoxiang thought to herself.
"Zheng Yi." She called him softly.
"Um?"
"It's okay, I just called you. I thought you were a nice person."
“…May I ask why you suddenly gave me the nice guy card?
Although Zheng Yi and Jiang Haoxiang were in a relationship, they still lived in separate rooms. Before going to bed at night, Zheng Yi would knock on the wall between their rooms to say goodnight. Jiang Haoxiang would sometimes knock back, sometimes not, depending on her mood.
Once, after Zheng Yi knocked on the wall, he waited for a long time without any response, and couldn't help but send a WeChat message: "Are you asleep?"
Jiang Haoxiang replied quickly: "No."
"Then why are you ignoring me?"
"I don't want to care."
Zheng Yi was angry for a long time and could only comfort himself.
In the bathroom, Jiang Haoxiang's orange-flavored toothpaste is always there, but Zheng Yi and Xiang Li don't use it.
One day, Zheng Yi ran out of toothpaste and borrowed hers. Jiang Haoxiang noticed it immediately while brushing her teeth at night and stared at Zheng Yi for a long time.
"What's wrong?" Zheng Yi felt guilty.
"You used my toothpaste."
"Just once..."
"Don't use it next time."
"Why?"
"be mine!"
Zheng Yi had no choice but to promise never to touch her toothpaste again. Xiang Li laughed at him when he found out: "Serves you right. Who told you to use other people's things?"
Jiang Cheng called Xiang Li on a Saturday afternoon. At that time, all three of them were at home, and Xiang Li went to the balcony to answer the call.
"What's the matter?" Xiang Li was very calm.
Jiang Cheng on the other end of the phone waited for a while before saying, "I really want to be at your place?"
"Yes. What's wrong?"
"Let her go home. I have something to talk to her about."
Xiang Li looked at the cat food cans on the balcony, wondering why there was so much less. He really needed to feed them less. Jiujiu was too pig-like. He replied to Jiang Cheng nonchalantly, "What are you talking about? If you're talking about her and Zheng Yi, then I suggest you save some money."
Jiang Cheng was displeased: "Xiang Li, this is a matter between me and my daughter."
"She's your daughter, sure, but she's also Zheng Yi's girlfriend. If you want to use your father's status to pressure her, then I, as a mother, can't just sit back and watch."
"What kind of mother are you?" Jiang Cheng sneered.
Xiang Lidu laughed: "What kind of mother am I? I don't know. Just post it online and ask any stranger. Ask what kind of mother I am. If you don't ask me, I can ask for you. And by the way, what kind of father is Jiang Cheng to her?"
There was silence on the other end of the phone.
Xiang Li continued, "I know what you want to talk about. You simply think that she and Zheng Yi are inappropriate, and you want to force her to submit. What tricks do you have? Besides yelling and going crazy, what else can you do? Cut off her financial support? I'm telling you, none of these will work."
"How do you know it's useless? She's my daughter, I have the right to control her!"
"Rights? Jiang Cheng, when did you exercise your father's rights? When you remarried? When your son was born? Or when you wanted to give up the room you wanted to Wang Jing's mother?"
"That's all in the past."
"The past? Then let's talk about the present. Can you buy Jiang Haoxiang the same house you bought for your son and your wife? Can you also prepare a way out for your son? Can you tell your son that he has to love his sister too? Can you tell your wife that she has to treat Jiang Haoxiang almost as well as your son? You can't do any of these, because you don't care at all. You're jumping out now and saying you want to control her, simply because you feel your authority has been challenged. Jiang Cheng, Haoxiang has grown up. Between you and Zheng Yi, she chose Zheng Yi, which is very telling."
"That's because you and your son brainwashed her."
Xiang Lizhen found it funny: "Ask yourself, has Haoxiang ever been the type to be easily influenced by others? She knows what she wants better than anyone else. She chose Zheng Yi, so if you really want to talk, you can. But Zheng Yi must be present. Now Jiang Haoxiang and Zheng Yi are together, and you only talk to Jiang Haoxiang alone. This is unfair. After all, one, you are the father, and two, you like to show off."
"I'm her father! Do I need outsiders' permission to talk to my own daughter?"
"Zheng Yi is not an outsider. He is the person I really want to choose. If you can't respect this, then there is nothing for us to talk about."
Jiang Cheng on the other end of the phone was furious: "Xiang Li, don't go too far!"
Xiang Li's voice was soft, almost gentle. "You're the one who's going too far, Jiang Cheng. You only realized you had to go on stage after the show was over? You won an award, and you wanted to take advantage of it? Don't you think it's too late?"
"Lin Ran is watching from heaven. You have caused the relationship between us father and daughter to fall apart. Have you ever considered what she thinks?!" Jiang Cheng kept silent and did not answer the previous question.
"What does she think? She should be very happy. Do you know how much money I've made recently? I really hope that this lucky star and Lin Ran's spirit in heaven will protect me. I heard that you've been losing money recently. What's going on?"
After saying that, she hung up the phone and stood on the balcony for a while before returning to the living room.
"Who is it?" Zheng Yi asked casually.
Xiang Li: "I'm a salesman, selling insurance. I'm telling you seriously, from now on, Jiujiu can only eat one can of food a day at most! What have you fed him?"
Jiang Haoxiang and Zheng Yi both pretended to be stupid: "Hehehehe..."
That evening, Zheng Yi noticed that Xiang Li had been in the study for a long time. He went in under the pretext of delivering some fruit: "Mom, are you okay?"
Xiang Li came back to his senses: "What could it be? It's just some troubles at work. I miss you so much."
"Reading in my room."
Xiang Li nodded: "Get out of here."
Zheng Yi: "Okay."
Jiang Haoxiang and Xiang Li seemed indifferent to Jiang Cheng's attempts to impose financial discipline. Jiang Haoxiang had been admitted to a good university with very low tuition fees, and her scholarship covered most of her expenses.
What really made Xiang Li laugh was that Jiang Cheng seemed to really think that cutting off the financial source would make Jiang Hao want to come back.
One time, when Xiang Li and Zheng Yi were having dinner alone, they brought up this matter: "Is Jiang Cheng still living in the last century? He thinks it's still the age where you can't afford to go to school without money?"
Zheng Yi didn't even raise his head: "Let him think whatever he wants. Anyway, I don't think I ever expected anything from him."
When it came to living expenses, Xiang Li never dragged Jiang Haoxiang into a long conversation, saying things like, "I'm your mother, it's only natural for me to spend my mother's money." Xiang Li knew Jiang Haoxiang too well; she was a thoughtful woman. The more serious he made things, the more pressure she would silently bear to repay him. Xiang Li felt that this was not right. It didn't make sense that his actions would only affect Jiang Haoxiang.
So Xiang Li's method is very "rough", usually just a casual turn.
"It's hot, buy some popsicles."
"It's a changing season, buy more clothes, buy them yourself."
"Eat more meat."
Smiling and joking while giving out money.
If it were Xiang Li herself, she would have taken all of Jiang Cheng's wealth because it was her comfort zone. She was determined to fight for it, so she wanted her son, the house and car, and Zheng's father's inheritance. But that was Xiang Li's way. Just like when she apologized to Jiang Haoxiang, Jiang Haoxiang had a different personality. She should treat others well in a way that they find good.
People's energy should be used to solve problems, not people, and everyone excels at solving different things. Jiang Hao wanted to have a bright future and plenty of time, to boldly pursue everything she wanted to do. Let go of the pain.
Just let go of Jiang Cheng, his stepmother, and his younger brother. Don't take everything to heart; it will only make your soul tired. Xiang Li wanted Jiang Hao to see the sun more often.
In fact, raising a child like Jiang Hao is not something Xiang Li can call a nurturing. It is just a piece of cake.
Jiang Haoxiang had never had to worry about her studies, had a healthy body, was calm and determined, and had even been admitted to a top university. Jiang Haoxiang had been well-trained from childhood to adulthood. Xiang Li felt unworthy of this credit.
Once, Jiang Haoxiang won a prize in a competition and bought a necklace for Xiang Li and a pair of headphones for Zheng Yi.
When Xiang Li received the gift, he said, "Good taste!" and then wore the necklace to work the next day.
Zheng Yi also unpacked and put on the headphones, saying, "I can't let my girlfriend down."
No one said you don’t have to buy things for us, and no one said it’s not easy for you to earn money and keep it for yourself.
We are a family, so don't do that.
Zheng Yi would frequently transfer money to Jiang Haoxiang. The card he gave Jiang Haoxiang would occasionally show spending records. Every time he saw a text message reminder, Zheng Yi was delighted.
The real surprise was Wang Jing. Jiang Haoxiang had received a transfer of tens of thousands of yuan, which she estimated was just enough for four years of university tuition and living expenses. Jiang Haoxiang was genuinely stunned. She suspected Wang Jing had done this without Jiang Cheng's knowledge. As for her motives, was it to gain a clear conscience, fearing future retribution, or perhaps because she saw Jiang Haoxiang as a promising young woman and wanted to curry her favor for future gains... Jiang Haoxiang didn't bother to delve into it.
She didn't return the money—it was Jiang Cheng's money anyway, so there was nothing to return. But she also didn't say a word of thanks to Wang Jing.
However, Zheng Yi said after knowing this: "She is good at doing favors."
Jiang Hao thought: "Let her do whatever she wants."
Almost everyone had praised Jiang Haoxiang for growing up and becoming sensible. She'd been hearing these compliments since she was four or five. To praise Jiang Cheng, relatives had also praised Jiang Haoxiang for looking nothing like her mother and becoming more and more like her father, Jiang Cheng. Using inappropriate language to praise someone was tantamount to insulting. It just didn't feel that way at the time. Her mother, having left the table prematurely, lost all right to explain herself.
Although Jiang Hao wanted to be precocious, she felt that her previous precocity was hollow. It seemed that she had only become truly intelligent in the past two years. The smarter she became, the more "immature" she seemed to be. The older she got, the less "grown-up" she seemed. She was old yet young, just as she had been young yet old long ago.
But she no longer cared about these things. Just like she was no longer afraid to accept the kindness of Xiang Li and Zheng Yi, because she believed that she was also good and could give back the same kindness to them.
In a family, children are always the most incompetent. The earlier they become smart, the more incompetent they are. Children bear the greatest responsibilities: the responsibility of maintaining the family, the obligation of being lively and cute, and the requirement of being obedient and sensible.
The sky is so dark from heavy thoughts that how can we see the sun?
It seems not to be the case now. Jiang Hao wants to say to himself solemnly countless times: It’s great to grow up.
She would no longer drown herself in the thick sea of past emotions. She had come ashore, determined to stay away from that sea, to forget it. She hated it, but it was only a shallow hatred. A deeper emotion should be used to love, wasn't it? Otherwise, the loss would outweigh the gain.
Growing up, she could express her love and hate. The ability to express love and hate was a form of power. She was no longer afraid of her own fears. She was afraid of many things: Xiang Li leaving, Zheng Yi leaving, Jiujiu leaving. That's when she learned to cherish.
Jiujiu is getting older, and Jiang Haoxiang is very worried.
Once, Jiujiu vomited, and Jiang Haoxiang was so anxious that she almost cried. She insisted on taking her to the veterinary hospital in the middle of the night. Zheng Yi drove them there, and after the doctor examined her, he said there was nothing wrong, and they both breathed a sigh of relief.
On the way home, Jiang Haoxiang hugged Maobao tightly and whispered, "I was scared to death."
Zheng Yikong held her hand with one hand: "It's okay, Jiujiu is blessed with a long life."
"It's thirteen years old."
"You're still a kitten at the age of thirteen." Zheng Yi pinched her fingers.
One weekend, Jiang Haoxiang was holding Jiujiu on the sofa, feeding him some corn kernels. Zheng Yi was sitting nearby, looking at architectural drawings. Xiang Li was passing by and saw this scene, which reminded him of a long time ago.
At that time, Jiujiu was still a kitten, and Jiang Haoxiang was also a tiny child. They were also eating sweet corn, she would take a bite herself, and occasionally peel a kernel and feed it to Jiujiu. Xiang Li was sitting next to them, watching the two of them. Little Jiang Haoxiang suddenly turned the corn in her hand around and offered the unbitten end to Xiang Li: "Auntie, it's so sweet, have a bite."
Xiang Li stood there, his heart awash with mixed emotions. Jiang Hao seemed to be just like that. She would remember any kindness shown to her, and then return it with a clumsy yet sincere response.
"Mom, why are you standing there in a daze?" Zheng Yi noticed Xiang Li's absent-mindedness.
Xiang Li came back to his senses and smiled: "Nothing. Want to have hot pot tonight?"
Zheng Yi picked up the phone: "Which one? Can I make a reservation now?"
"It's the one at the entrance of the community."
"OK."
After a few days, Zheng Yi mysteriously wanted to take Jiang Hao out.
"Where are you going?" Jiang Hao wanted to ask.
"You'll know when you get there."
Zheng Yi drove her through the familiar streets and finally stopped at the gate of the park where she had run away from home.
Jiang Haoxiang looked at the park gate with a subtle expression: "What are you doing here?"
Zheng Yi pulled her inside and found the ginkgo tree. It was midsummer, and the ginkgo tree was lush and green, with its fan-shaped green leaves swaying like applause.
"Refresh your memory." Zheng Yi patted the tree trunk and looked up at the treetops. "The wish you made here that year is now coming true." And the wish I made that year has already come true."
Jiang Haoxiang was curious: "What wish did you make?"
Zheng Yi kept it a secret: "I won't tell you."
"Forget it if you don't want to say it." Jiang Hao wanted to turn around and leave.
Zheng Yi quickly grabbed her and said, "Don't go. Now that you're here, sit for a while."
He sat down on the bench under the tree and patted the seat next to him. Jiang Haoxiang hesitated for a moment, but finally sat down. It was just right, the light swirled around Jiang Haoxiang, draped over her like a shawl. No matter how many times he looked at it, Zheng Yi felt his heart flutter.
"Actually, there's nothing I can't say." Zheng Yi looked into the distance, avoiding the light so that his words could find a way out. "I just hope you'll never leave me."
That morning, he searched everywhere like a headless fly, his mind filled with all kinds of assumptions. When he found Jiang Haoxiang huddled under a tree, he was filled with nothing but fear and anger towards Jiang Cheng.
He thought at the time that it would be great if Jiang Haoxiang could leave that home completely.
But then he thought again. Jiang Haoxiang and Jiang Cheng were still related by blood, but what about him and Jiang Haoxiang? There was no guarantee between them. If Jiang Haoxiang left, would she drift to a place where he could never find her again?
At that time, he hugged the shivering Jiang Haoxiang and made a wish in his heart: I wish Jiang Haoxiang and I could have a relationship where I would never have to worry about her leaving.
This wish seemed out of reach at the time, but now——
Zheng Yi looked at Jiang Haoxiang beside him, and he reached out and held her hand.
He couldn't say for sure whether his wish would come true, but at this moment, just being able to hold her hand was enough.
"Why are you grinning like an idiot?" Jiang Hao seemed to feel uncomfortable being stared at by him, and tried to pull his hand away but failed.
"Nothing," Zheng Yi tightened his grip and brought her closer to him, "I just thought this tree looked pretty in the summer."
"nerve."
They wandered around the park for a while longer, even going on some of the rides we used to play as kids. Zheng Yi insisted on riding the carousel, and Jiang Hao, feeling embarrassed, refused to get on, but he eventually dragged her up.
"Are you childish?" Jiang Haoxiang wanted to sit on the wooden horse, with a look of disgust on his face.
"What's wrong with being childish?"
The ginkgo leaves rustled overhead, responding to the boy’s fervent prayers on that winter day many years ago.
Let it go on like this.
That's good.
It couldn't be better.
-----------------------
The author has something to say: Thank you all for your love for Xiao Jiang and Zheng Yi. I feel very honored. I sincerely wish everyone a good life, as peaceful as possible, a healthy body, and a free soul.
Seeing so many readers sharing stories similar to Xiao Jiang's in the comments section, I really want to hold your hands across the internet. I hope you can receive a little bit of the strength I'm sending you. I have very low energy, but my energy is no less than anyone else's. I hope my friends can remember this—our energy is no less than anyone else's.
I also think of my biological mother occasionally. I don’t have the chance to say it, so I’ll just say it here: I love you very much.
Thank you all for your company. I have no way to repay you except to write more fanfiction. I will do my best.
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