Chapter 26 Fang Minzhou didn't sleep well last night...
Fang Minzhou didn't sleep well the night before, and woke up at the crack of dawn the next day. Fortunately, she got up even earlier to go to school. When she arrived at the classroom, besides the usual early-arriving boarding students, Wang Kan was actually earlier than her, wearing headphones and reading an English book, though her eyes were closed.
Fang Minzhou didn't know whether to laugh or wake him up. She stood there for a while until Wang Kan half-opened his eyes as if he had sensed something, "...You're here."
Yawning, he took off his headphones, stood up, and let Fang Minzhou in.
Fang Minzhou then noticed a small strawberry cake on the corner of her table.
Fang Minzhou: "..."
She placed the cake, somewhat angrily, on Wang Kan's pile of books.
"Huh?" Wang Kan leaned back in his chair after realizing what was happening, grinning lazily. "I didn't give this to you."
Fang Minzhou's face conveyed only three words: You're lying to me.
"It wasn't me who gave it to you, it was your friend from Class 8 next door."
...January?
Fang Minzhou was now in a dilemma. Whether she believed it or not, she would be embarrassed: if she believed it, it would mean that she had been deluding herself; if she didn't believe it, it would be even more shameful if it really was a gift from Yuan Yue.
Wang Kan looked at Fang Minzhou's face, which was feigning indifference but silently flushed. She had been playing games all night because she couldn't sleep, so she was in a very good mood. Understandingly, she put the cake back on Fang Minzhou's table, leaned closer to her, and whispered, "You can also take it as a gift from me. I did want to give it to her, but I was afraid of running into you."
The boy's scent licked at her like tongues of fire, causing Fang Minzhou's breath to catch in her throat. She leaned to the other side, keeping her distance without changing her expression, and then glanced at Wang Kan, warning him with her eyes. Wang Kan pursed his lips and sat up straight.
Some girls noticed the commotion and looked over. They weren't sure if it was a real argument or not, but knowing what had happened before, they joked, "Wang Kan, why did you make your deskmate angry so early in the morning?"
“I didn’t, I wouldn’t dare,” Wang Kan said.
"Minzhou, when are we going to change seats? I'd like to ask the teacher if we can sit together."
Wang Kan's heart skipped a beat, while Fang Minzhou readily agreed, "Okay."
Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Wang Kan's embarrassed expression, and his mood instantly brightened, and he smiled even more broadly.
At this moment, Sun Tong turned around and glanced at them, still expressionless. Fang Min was stunned, thinking that she had disturbed her studies, and immediately put away her smile awkwardly.
There was also a strange sense of unease, as if I had been seen through.
After the classroom quieted down again, Fang Minzhou received a note from Wang Kan: You're not serious, are you?
Before she could figure out what to do with the note, Wang Kan passed her another one: "Do you know what a feint is? If we pretend to be arguing, no one will suspect anything, right?"
Fang Minzhou thought to herself, "Who wants to play along with your feint?" But then she suddenly remembered something, so she replied to Wang Kan, "How did you know my phone number?"
Wang Kan finally received a response from Fang Minzhou, replying quickly, but the note she received read: "You saw the text message? Then why didn't you reply?"
Fang Minzhou: ...
There was no feint; it was just a misunderstanding.
She took out her book, and Wang Kan, seeing this, took the note back and handed it back. Next to her sentence were two large circled words and an exclamation mark: Secret!
Fang Minzhou tore up the note again and threw it into the trash bag.
At noon, Fang Minzhou and Yuan Yue went to eat noodles outside the school. After learning that the cake was indeed given by Yuan Yue, Fang Minzhou buried her face in the bowl of noodles.
"So why do you think it was given to you by your deskmate?" Yuan Yue asked after learning the whole story.
"...I just assumed it was a gift from him."
January: "Oh...so you and your deskmate are getting along pretty well now."
Fang Minzhou: "..."
If she didn't know Yuan Yue well enough, she would have thought she was deliberately making fun of her.
“…Let it be,” Fang Minzhou said.
"That's great! You don't know how awkward I felt every time I saw your deskmate." Yuan Yue still felt a pang of sadness when she recalled the past.
Fang Minzhou chuckled: "That was so long ago."
Before Yuan Yue could say anything more, she suddenly seemed to see someone, pursed her lips, and smiled shyly behind Fang Minzhou.
Fang Minzhou, who had her back to the shop door, turned around curiously.
It was lunchtime, and they arrived at just the right time. There was still a small two-person table near the cashier and the kitchen, while a queue had already formed between the two rows of tables in the shop.
The person who greeted Yuan Yue was probably the boy with glasses in the group, the one who sat behind Yuan Yue, what was his name again... Shen Luming.
At first, Yuan Yue only called him "the student behind me". Later, Fang Minzhou learned his name and felt that it sounded familiar. One time after an exam, she suddenly remembered the reason: before the classes were divided in the first year of high school, this person was always among the top students in the grade.
When Yuan Yue said, "The student behind me is doing very well in school," Fang Minzhou was a little skeptical, thinking that she was just blind to love. She subtly reminded her to focus on her studies, and Yuan Yue laughed at her for being just like her brother.
Over there, Shen Luming also gave them a shy smile and a greeting.
When Fang Minzhou turned around again, she saw that Yuan Yue's face was completely red. In the steamy little shop, they were like two unripe fruits on a tree.
Fang Minzhou found it both funny and cute. When she looked at Shen Luming again, the shop door at the end of her line of sight was pulled open from the outside, and several boys rushed in. One of them pulled down his hoodie, revealing his hair standing on end and his features clearly defined. Upon discovering that the shop was packed with people, he looked up and sighed dramatically.
Immediately afterward, Fang Minzhou didn't know why Wang Kan looked in her direction at a glance, but her eyes lit up as if she had discovered a new continent. Fang Minzhou quickly turned around, forgetting the teasing words she wanted to say to Yuan Yue, and was instead asked with concern by Yuan Yue: "What's wrong?"
Fang Minzhou shook her head as she ate her noodles.
Yuan Yue glanced curiously into the store and immediately understood. She saw that Wang Kan was pretending to chat with her friend next to her, but her eyes were actually glancing at them. Her gaze then shifted subtly, and she saw Shen Luming getting closer and closer to the cashier, and also closer and closer to her.
Their eyes met lightly, like two eggs touching, as if they could hear each other's heartbeats that way.
Fang Minzhou found the scene ridiculous and complained with a headache, "This shop is too small."
Unexpectedly, an auntie carrying tableware back to the kitchen overheard them. "I'm sorry, young lady," the auntie said frankly and loudly, "the shop is small, please be considerate!"
The others in the shop were confused. Fang Minzhou was now practically burying her face in her bowl. Yuan Yue couldn't help but chuckle, but she also blushed. The two quickly finished the rest of their noodles and gave their seats to Shen Luming and his friend, who were waiting. The latter was also from Class 8, and Fang Minzhou guessed from his expression that he, like her, seemed to know something fishy.
On the surface, everyone acted as if nothing was wrong. Just as Fang Minzhou walked past Wang Kan without glancing at him, Yuan Yue pretended that she knew nothing.
"Fang Minzhou, huh?" Zheng Yanhang only noticed it at this moment.
He gestured to Wang Kan, but Wang Kan frowned and looked into the shop. "Do you know each other?"
"Who?" Zheng Yanhang followed Wang Kan's gaze and saw two boys in the corner. "I don't know them."
"It seems to be from Class 8 next door," Wu Cheng said.
Zheng Yanhang: "What's wrong?"
"It's okay, I made a mistake."
If it's someone from Class 8, then it seems they have a close relationship with Fang Minzhou's friend.
Zheng Yanhang and Wu Cheng exchanged a glance. Zheng Yanhang pouted and secretly pointed to his temple with his finger.
Only after leaving the noodle shop did Fang Minzhou dare to speak again. She told Yuan Yue, "I won't be eating noodles here for the next month."
Yuan Yue smiled and comforted her, "It's okay, let's go eat something else."
Fang Minzhou wanted to cry but had no tears.
When she returned to her dormitory at noon in January, Fang Minzhou accompanied her to the dormitory building.
On the way, Yuan Yue and Fang Minzhou talked about Shen Luming. Fang Minzhou listened silently the whole time, but when she heard that Yuan Yue and Shen Luming had arranged to meet at the library during the winter break, Fang Minzhou was startled.
"But it was a Monday, and we all forgot that the library is closed on Mondays, haha. So... we went to see a movie."
Fang Minzhou breathed a sigh of relief, but then tensed up again: ...Watch a movie?
But Yuan Yue didn't say what happened during the movie or afterward, as if nothing really happened. Her bright eyes looked at Fang Minzhou, and what she really wanted to tell Fang Minzhou was, "...we're together."
Fang Minzhou had a premonition, but hearing it with her own ears still surprised her.
"Actually, I didn't expect him to confess his feelings..."
Just yesterday, Yuan Yue had no idea why Shen Luming would suddenly confess to her. She thought he wouldn't say it, and she originally thought it was okay, that things were fine as they were, but... "Min Zhou, do you know? It's completely different."
How is it different? They are in a secret relationship. Compared to other high-profile couples at school, they avoid eating alone and never show affection in public. At least at school, they are just ordinary classmates, sitting at the same desk as each other. "But I know in my heart that he is my boyfriend, and I feel... I can truly start to like someone, and there is someone who knows about my feelings."
Fang Minzhou was terrified.
She had heard that love can change people, but Yuan Yue was still the Yuan Yue she knew. She was cute, innocent, and kind. She was also obedient, sensible, and well-behaved. It wasn't that she wasn't worried about it affecting her studies, or about being discovered by her teacher and her strict brother. So why would she take the risk?
Because you like it so much that you can't help yourself?
She thought of Ouyang Qian, so it turned out that Yuan Yue was also a brave person.
Is this bravery?
Fang Minzhou was a little confused.
They had already reached the dormitory building, but their conversation was not yet over.
There is a small garden in front of the girls' dormitory. Spring has arrived, and the greenery is growing stronger. They sit on long stone benches, basking in the warm midday sun, while tiny white butterflies flit among the budding bushes.
As Yuan Yue spoke, Fang Minzhou continued to listen, hearing about her first impression of Shen Luming, how she fell in love with him, and her most heart-stirring experience.
She was like a fawn frolicking in the forest, and in Fang Minzhou's heart, a fawn was also fluttering wildly.
She looked down and saw their hands gleaming in the sunlight, like flowing seawater, their healthy nails resembling tiny pink seashells.
Without realizing it, she mentioned Wang Kan.
Like Ouyang Qian, Yuan Yue only had a vague understanding of the situation between her and Wang Kan. However, Ouyang Qian saw things clearly and had her own interpretation. Fang Minzhou sometimes subtly avoided her, but Yuan Yue was not in the same class as them. She was a more gentle and detached presence.
Fang Min couldn't explain her troubles at the beginning of the week.
Logically speaking, she had already made it clear to Wang Kan that she wouldn't date in high school, and Wang Kan's unreasonable behavior was his problem. So what was she still upset about? Was it because she felt guilty for not doing what she said she would do?
But Yuan Yue was very patient, and Fang Minzhou gradually sorted out her thoughts, as if she had put all her thoughts under the sun to dry them one by one.
She doesn't date young, but she doesn't try to dissuade others from doing so, because everyone has different choices and ideas.
Ultimately, she was afraid of too many things.
She fears that if she says she won't talk about it now, she might go back on her word someday, which would make her seem weak-willed, and a weak will is a serious form of ideological corruption.
She was afraid that her grades would drop, and she was also afraid that she would drag others down in their exams;
She was also afraid... Although she disliked Wang Kan, she didn't hate him that much, and perhaps after a while, Wang Kan would lose interest in bothering her.
"Am I overthinking things?" Fang Minzhou asked, but she actually knew the answer.
Yuan Yue nodded, and Fang Minzhou couldn't help but feel disappointed, but then she heard her say, "No wonder your grades are so good!"
Fang Minzhou was stunned: "...Huh?"
Yuan Yue's eyes shone with admiration. "Look how meticulous you are in your thinking, and how insightful your analysis is!"
Fang Minzhou: "..."
She was both amused and exasperated.
“It’s normal to be scared, I’m scared too.” Yuan Yue leaned against Fang Minzhou and pulled up her sleeve. “But because you’re scared, you’ll be clearer about what you want most, right?”
Fang Minzhou was slightly taken aback, carefully considering what Yuan Yue had said.
“I’m not like you. My grades aren’t that good. It’s okay if I don’t do well on a test. I don’t think about it that much. But don’t follow my example.”
Fang Minzhou burst out laughing.
She remembered that Ouyang Qian had leaned on her like this on New Year's Eve during the performance; it seemed that some things really just needed to be talked about. Being able to speak out could bring a little freedom.
They chatted for a while longer, but time was running out, so one went back to the dormitory and the other went back to the classroom.
As Fang Min walked around, she asked herself, what is it that she wants most?
Upon entering the classroom, Wang Kan was sleeping on the desk. Presumably sensing someone approaching, she lifted her face from behind her elbow and then got up.
After Fang Minzhou sat down, she ate the small cake that Yuan Yue had given her.
Yu Guang noticed something and glanced to the side. Wang Kan was facing her, lying on the table, secretly peeking out at her. Realizing she'd been discovered, he buried his head again like an ostrich.
Fang Minzhou slowly swallowed the piece of cake in her mouth, with a fork in her mouth.
I really don't know what to say. How could she not have noticed? Or did he deliberately want her to find out?
But just as Wang Kan said, she couldn't control it, nor could she control the heat creeping up her face.
In retrospect, her conversation with Wang Kan last night was undoubtedly a failure. Wang Kan fulfilled some of the demands she made, but not others. He didn't send her the gifts, but he would follow her to the station every evening after self-study.
He said, "I didn't go home with you. Where do you live? I just came here to catch the bus."
Since his legs were on his body, Fang Minzhou's orders were ineffective and there was nothing he could do.
But in reality, things didn't seem too bad. Amidst the crowd of students all in school uniforms, Fang Minzhou realized that nobody really paid attention to them. Everything was the same as before; just as others saw Yuan Yue and Shen Luming as ordinary deskmates, and her and Wang Kan as ordinary classmates, perhaps not even that close.
Worries are like spiders spinning webs in the dark during winter, but when spring arrives, the gentle spring rains, night after night, melt away those soft and fragile thoughts.
Where did the spider go?
Let's leave it at that for now.
Fang Minzhou didn't know whether her thinking was self-abandonment or simply going with the flow.
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