Chapter 6: The Days I Sat at the Same Table as Fang Minzhou...
The days of sitting at the same table as Fang Minzhou were becoming increasingly agonizing for Wang Kan.
What's even more terrifying is that Wang Kan discovered she didn't dislike Fang Minzhou, at least not as much as Fang Minzhou disliked her.
Perhaps he felt guilty for injuring her with the basketball, but Wang Kan secretly observed Fang Minzhou raising her hands and legs, and she seemed unaffected.
Based on various considerations, he became the one who took the initiative to try to repair their relationship.
He brought Fang Minzhou breakfast, but she refused; he bought her a drink during PE class, but she refused; he forcibly interrupted Fang Minzhou and Ouyang Qian's conversation, causing it to end prematurely; he asked Fang Minzhou questions, which he could talk to for a few minutes, but asking too many questions was not good for his image, and there was also Jin Baihao competing with him, and Fang Minzhou seemed to prefer discussing the questions with Jin Baihao.
After several days of effort, not only did it not help, but it also added fuel to the fire, because Fang Minzhou couldn't take it anymore and asked him, "What exactly do you want?"
Wang Kan looked innocent: "I didn't do anything."
Thursday morning's Chinese class is two periods in a row. This week, the teacher asked them to write an essay on the spot in one and a half periods. After they finished writing, their deskmates corrected each other's work and then handed it in.
The essay topic introduced the life of the French philosopher Sartre and asked students to briefly discuss their understanding of the phrase "Hell is other people." When the essay papers were handed out, there was widespread lamentation.
Even after the teacher gave a brief analysis of the problem, Wang Kan still had no clue what to do.
He bit his pen and wrote without finishing the sentence. He thought Fang Minzhou would be unwilling to exchange essays with him, but Fang Minzhou waited for him after he finished writing. As a result, Wang Kan, who still had some time, suddenly felt pressured and wrote the last sentence in a flurry of words.
Fang Minzhou could tell he was anxious, but didn't know what he was anxious about. He wanted Wang Kan to take his time writing, but after hesitating for a while, he remained silent.
When Wang Kan got Fang Minzhou's essay, he read the beginning and wanted to take his own essay back. Although he couldn't write, he could still read it.
As he looked at it, it suddenly dawned on him that he understood the meaning of the essay topic and realized that he had gone astray.
Wang Kan couldn't help but glance at Fang Minzhou every time she read a passage. Her writing, "Treat the gaze of others correctly and listen carefully to the voice of your own heart," sounded very reasonable, but she herself didn't seem to be that rational.
While being scrutinized by Wang Kan, reading his incoherent writing, and having her essay examined by him... Fang Minzhou warned Wang Kan with her eyes, but the latter nonchalantly withdrew his gaze, twirling his pen with his fingertips, and nodded seriously as he looked at her essay.
Fang Minzhou: "..."
She composed herself and gave Wang Kan a score of 40 out of 60 on her essay.
Regardless of whether he wrote it seriously, his repetitive writing about being kind to others completely went off-topic. Giving him 38 points wouldn't be unfair, but that's far too low. Considering that the teacher would see the comments, Fang Minzhou wrote it much more tactfully: the article's viewpoint was relatively clear, and the argument revolved around "kindness," but the overall meaning was slightly inconsistent with the essay topic, and the evidence was not sufficient.
Wang Kan didn't seem angry or disappointed. Instead, she said to her as if she were taking credit, "How about it? Did I give you a high score?"
Fang Minzhou thought to himself, "Couldn't he just say a few less words?"
She was a little embarrassed to hand in her essay.
After class and lunch, Fang Minzhou usually studies and rests in the classroom during lunch break, but today she went to the library.
The books in the library vary in age, and the paper and ink that have been used for many years have a special smell. It's not a pleasant smell, but rather like the grass after the rain, which has a fishy smell, but also a sense of vitality.
As her thoughts returned to her senses, Fang Minzhou was somewhat surprised to find herself still thinking about the essay she had written that morning. 55 points—this was the highest score she had received for an essay since starting high school, even though it came from a grader with no real authority.
The stories of Yu Gong moving mountains and Sisyphus, which are such overused writing materials, are probably only thought to be well-written by Wang Kan.
Because so many people are the same, it is even more obvious who has good writing skills, who has more knowledge, and who has a novel idea. For example, in the grade-level model essays in this semester's opening exam, there are quite a few students from science classes, and their overall rankings are also very high. There is one in her class, Sun Tong, who ranked first in the class in this monthly exam.
Fang Minzhou's scores in each subject were very average. Among her classmates in the same score range, the difference in science subjects was not significant. The main subjects that set the difference apart were Chinese, which was the most subjective and Fang Minzhou did not have an advantage in. In fact, she also disliked writing Chinese papers. She was somewhat envious of those classmates who clearly had a talent for writing.
Perhaps because she enjoys reading, and now, in order to accumulate writing material, she focuses on reading useful literary classics and biographies of famous people. This conscious choice makes her feel that she has deviated from the original meaning of reading, which makes her feel ashamed.
Fang Minzhou felt that she had become very pragmatic, but at the same time she was very confused.
Yuan Yue is like a child who grew up reading fairy tales, or rather, she is the child in a fairy tale. In her eyes, words like truth, goodness, beauty, dreams, and hope are shining diamonds and pearls.
Although she herself did not know what she would do in the future, she was happy for others who did; although Fang Minzhou did not know either, Yuan Yue felt that one day she would also possess a treasure, but Fang Minzhou herself did not have this confidence.
Some people are still not satisfied even with a fortune, while others are happy with just a broken bowl. Which one would she be? Fang Minzhou didn't know.
In junior high, she aimed for No. 1 High School because it was the best high school in Zhangcheng. However, the best high schools attract the best students, and after actually entering No. 1 High School, Fang Minzhou felt that she was too ordinary. There are always people better than you, and there is always something beyond your understanding. Growing up is like humanity proposing the heliocentric theory, discovering that the world does not revolve around you.
Fang Minzhou understood that she shouldn't worry so much unnecessarily, but perhaps it was precisely because she was an ordinary person that she would worry so much. The meaning of learning, her self-worth, her future life... were like tree branches or pebbles growing on a path, always tripping her up.
Science says the human body is composed of 60% to 70% water, and Fang Minzhou felt that the same proportion of confusion and doubt flowed through her body. Most of the time they were quiet, but sometimes she would suddenly fall into deep thought as if she had a fever.
It wasn't like this before. It's strange, like physical development, which is uncomfortable because it's too secretive and chaotic to talk about, yet I secretly and curiously admire myself.
Do other people do the same? Fang Minzhou remembered seeing Sun Tong in the library before, but because they weren't very familiar with each other, she didn't take the initiative to go up and say hello.
The school library has already implemented an electronic borrowing system, but some old books still have library cards attached to the back covers. Looking at the unfamiliar names and distant dates on them, Fang Minzhou couldn't help but wonder what these senior students were doing now, and what she would be like five or ten years from now.
As Fang Minzhou overthought things, her heart cooled again. She now felt her earlier ramblings were rather melodramatic. She'd rather use that time to read a few more pages or do a few more practice problems.
The Chinese teacher recommended several introductory philosophy books in class. Now, on the bookshelf in front of Fang Minzhou, there were two copies of *Sophie's World* side by side, both with green covers. The older version was a deeper green, with a peeling cover, while the newer version was practically brand new. She had flipped through a few pages of this book in junior high school but hadn't finished it.
Fang Minzhou chose the old version, went to the front desk, borrowed the book, and then asked the teacher for transparent tape and scissors. She then painstakingly pieced together the pitiful book cover. Suddenly, a voice rang out in her ear: "What did you borrow?"
Fang Min was startled, but after recognizing who it was, she immediately left the library.
Wang Kan caught up, "Sophie's World...wait, wasn't that recommended by our Chinese teacher this morning?"
The library of No. 1 Middle School is a separate two-story building. The first floor has a reading room and a study room, and the second floor has a borrowing room. Fang Minzhou walked briskly down the stairs and went straight through the small circular square in front of the library.
"You're walking so fast again." Wang Kan kept talking behind him. "Wow, Fang Minzhou, you're really too serious. You came to borrow the book the teacher just recommended right away. No wonder..."
Wang Kan couldn't finish her sentence because Fang Minzhou suddenly stopped, and Wang Kan almost bumped into him.
Fang Minzhou, who had managed to compose herself, suddenly lost her composure. "I just came to borrow it, is that not allowed?"
"I didn't say no..."
"Didn't you come too?"
Her attitude was rude, and Wang Kan's tone followed suit: "You can come but I can't? Do you own the library? Fang Minzhou, you're a really strange person. What did I do to you?"
"Me, strange?" Fang Minzhou said as if she had heard the biggest joke in the world. "It's clearly you who's always being sarcastic and unsettling."
Wang Kan stared at himself, dumbfounded, "What did I say? I praised you for studying hard, and that wasn't enough?"
Are you praising me for studying hard?
"Yes, I told you to borrow the book the teacher recommended right away. No wonder your essays are so good. Why are you being sarcastic? Can't I borrow a book to cultivate my mind?"
As the autumn wind swept up the fallen leaves, Fang Minzhou fell silent, and her fierce and aggressive demeanor subsided.
After a long silence, Wang Kan knew he had won this round, but he wasn't particularly happy. "You just don't like me, so everything I say sounds bad to you. What's that called? What's the opposite of 'love me, love my dog'?"
Realizing she had misunderstood, Fang Minzhou felt guilty but couldn't bring herself to back down. She hugged the books in her arms tightly and faced off against Wang Kan with her lips pressed together.
The midday sun in autumn was golden, and Wang Kan was facing the sun, frowning from the sunlight. "If you're still angry that I accidentally hit you with a basketball, then hit it back at me during PE class this afternoon."
He felt he couldn't live like this if he didn't retaliate.
"...No need, I said it's okay."
"Then what else do you dislike about me? Just give me a straight answer, and I'll change, okay?"
Fang Minzhou looked at Wang Kan, speechless for a moment. She thought about all the things she had said about him, but she didn't realize that she had caused Wang Kan so much trouble. But what had she done?
After a while, she said, "I want to sit inside."
"What?" Wang Kan didn't react.
"...I'd like to switch seats with you. I'd like to sit inside."
“Sure,” Wang Kan suddenly realized, “I even specially reserved the outside seat for you.”
"...You specially left this for me?" Fang Minzhou raised her voice slightly.
"Yeah, isn't it more convenient to sit outside? But now I know, you're annoyed by me constantly going in and out, aren't you? You should have said so earlier. I didn't mean to bother you. Who knew you wouldn't even take a break after class every day..."
Fang Minzhou, who was learning for the first time that Wang Kan had such ingenious ideas, was convinced that her thought process was indeed incompatible with his.
A note from the author:
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