Chapter 29 No Future Gu Xi suddenly burst into tears: "You are..."
Suddenly, Zhu Yin knocked on the door.
"Your Majesty, Your Highness, dinner is ready. May I come in?"
"Come in," Xiao Heng said to the doorway.
Zhu Yin placed the things on the table, and Xiao Heng then dismissed her. Before leaving, she glanced at Gu Xi with concern, clearly sensing that the atmosphere between the two was off.
Xiao Heng lifted the hem of his shirt and sat down. He flicked his wide sleeves, ladled out a bowl of soup, and turned to Gu Xi, saying, "Come and eat first."
Gu Xi did not respond to him.
"emperor......"
Xiao Heng stopped what he was doing and listened to her.
"Your Majesty...do you love Sister Lu?" Gu Xi asked in a low voice.
"I don't love you," Xiao Heng said without hesitation.
Gu Xi looked up in shock.
He doesn't love her? Then what is his relationship with Lu Mengli?
"Our relationship is nothing more than mutual exploitation," Xiao Heng explained, not wanting her to misunderstand his relationship with Consort Li.
Mutual exploitation?
It was all a lie. His affection for Consort Li was fake, but what about his feelings for himself? Were his feelings for her genuine?
"And what about me? Is Your Majesty also using me?" Gu Xi murmured, her words sounding more like a question to herself than to Xiao Heng.
Xiao Heng did not answer. He did not deny that he had also used her, but his feelings for her were not just about using her.
He wants her!
Xiao Heng's silence made Gu Xi's heart sink little by little. How could she have thought that she was even slightly different in his heart? How could she have allowed herself to fall into this illusory emotion?
Has she forgotten what she told herself when she first saw Consort Wan?
Speaking of Consort Wan...
Gu Xi seemed to suddenly remember something and questioned, "Why did Your Majesty pin the blame for poisoning on Consort Wan, causing her to lose her life in vain?"
"She deserves to die!" His eyes were sinister, and his voice was like a poisoned ice blade.
She harmed his people; if she weren't still of use to him, he wouldn't have let her live to see that day!
"You promised me you would spare her," Gu Xi's voice trembled slightly.
"I only promised you that I would heal the wounds on her face, I never said I would let her go."
Gu Xi looked at him in disbelief, then suddenly remembered something and asked in a panic, "Where are the two palace maids?"
Xiao Heng's eyes flickered slightly, but he did not answer.
"If Your Majesty won't tell me, I'll investigate myself!"
"You dare!" His jaw was clenched tightly, his eyes fixed on Gu Xi.
"What wouldn't I dare to do? Does Your Majesty intend to kill me as well?" Gu Xi sneered.
Her laughter stung him, and he couldn't bear to look at her anymore. He stood up and strode over to her. Before Gu Xi could react, he pulled her tightly into his arms.
Gu Xi suddenly burst into tears: "Did you kill them too?" Gu Xi was in extreme pain. Had she caused their deaths? She hadn't killed Bo Ren, but Bo Ren had died because of her.
Her cries caused him a dull ache in his heart. He held Gu Xi tighter and said in a hoarse voice, "I didn't kill them. I just made sure they could never speak again." He had Zhao Fuquan give them a drug to make them mute and then threw them into the servants' quarters.
His explanation did not stop Gu Xi's crying; instead, she cried even louder. He had never seen her like this before and was at a loss for what to do. He could only gently stroke the top of her head, trying to calm her down.
But she kept crying, her tears soaking his clothes, and she showed no sign of stopping.
Helpless, Xiao Heng had no choice but to carry Gu Xi to the bed. At first, she struggled, but when she realized that he was just holding her and sitting on the bed without doing anything else, she continued to cry in his arms. Finally, she cried herself to sleep.
Xiao Heng moved his numb arm, looked up at the untouched food on the table, and then looked down at the person in his arms. Her eyelids were slightly swollen, and there were still teardrops on her eyelashes. A sudden, subtle pain welled up in his heart.
He didn't understand why she was crying so bitterly. Even if two mere palace maids were dead, they weren't worth her being so heartbroken.
He didn't think he had done anything wrong. In his eyes, these people's lives were as insignificant as a feather; they deserved punishment for speaking out of turn, and life and death were merely a matter of his word. In this vast palace, countless people died every day for various reasons, and no one cared at all.
*
The next morning, Gu Xi opened her eyes and found herself lying in bed. She looked at the beams on the roof, and the events of the previous day were still vivid in her mind.
She got out of bed and sat in front of the dressing table. In the mirror, her eyes were swollen like walnuts, making her already unattractive face even more unsightly.
She stopped crying. Since it had already happened, she would try her best to make amends. She wanted to find the two palace maids, heal them, and help them speak again.
After tidying herself up, she pushed open the door, and the sunlight streaming in was almost blinding.
She walked toward the flower garden, where there were several medicinal herbs that were remarkably effective in treating muteness; she needed to take good care of them.
"Miss! You're up. Why are you dressed so lightly?" Zhu Yin said as she draped a cloak over Gu Xi's shoulders.
After delivering dinner last night, Zhu Yin was called back to her room by Zhao Fuquan. She didn't know what had happened between Xiao Heng and Gu Xi. When she saw her come out today, she thought she was alright.
Before Gu Xi could answer, Zhao Fuquan's shrill voice suddenly came from outside the door.
"His Majesty has arrived!"
Xiao Heng saw Gu Xi as soon as he entered the room and strode towards her.
He went back to the Qianqing Palace early in the morning to change into his court robes, and worried that she wouldn't eat properly again, so he rushed over.
Xiao Heng came to Gu Xi's side. The spring morning was still a bit chilly, so he pulled her cloak tighter around her.
He reached out and gently stroked her swollen eyes, and she rubbed her fingers against his, like a lazy kitten.
His Adam's apple bobbed a few times as he suppressed the pounding in his heart.
He asked in a hoarse voice, "Have you had breakfast?"
Gu Xi shook her head.
"Then dine with me."
He took her mud-covered hand in his, his large, warm palm enveloping her cold fingertips. They were as intimate as lovers. Gu Xi looked down at their intertwined hands but did not pull away.
Back inside, Cailian and Zhuyin had already prepared the food.
After washing their hands, the two sat down close together.
Seeing that she was no longer as resistant to him as she had been yesterday, and was even willing to dine with him, Xiao Heng thought that her anger must have subsided considerably.
After he finished eating and put down his chopsticks, he saw Gu Xi staring blankly ahead, her bowl still empty, having eaten nothing.
"What are you thinking about?"
Gu Xi snapped out of her daze, bringing her thoughts back to the present, and did not answer.
"Can't you eat?" Xiao Heng asked with concern.
"Hmm, maybe I got up a little early today, I don't have much of an appetite..." Gu Xi replied casually.
"Eat something." Xiao Heng ladled a bowl of porridge and placed it in front of Gu Xi.
She stared at the bowl of porridge in front of her for a long time, seemingly lost in thought, before suddenly speaking, "His Majesty should go to court."
"It's still early, I'll sit with you a little longer."
Gu Xi suddenly turned to look at Xiao Heng. When their eyes met, his gaze was so gentle, as if that gentleness was reserved only for her. At that moment, she felt so reluctant to part.
But she couldn't let herself continue to indulge in this. His kindness to her might be a knife's edge, a sharp blade, and one day it would stab her back. If she continued to indulge herself, she didn't know what she would face in the future.
The light in her eyes froze instantly, and she said in a distant tone, "Your Majesty, all I want is for Zhuyin, Cailian, and Huayue to stay with me."
She spoke with a firm expression and resolute gaze, as if she had made up her mind.
"Besides, there is no room for anyone else in my household."
What she meant was that she hoped Xiao Heng would stop coming, that she hoped he would stay away from her and let her go.
The smile on Xiao Heng's lips gradually faded. He stared at Gu Xi without saying a word, as if trying to see through her eyes to understand what she was thinking.
The two remained locked in a stalemate.
Zhao Fuquan stood to the side, not daring to utter a sound. Did Consort Gu even know what he was saying?! He couldn't imagine what kind of life he would have to endure in the Qianqing Palace from now on...
With the time for court approaching, Zhao Fuquan had no choice but to bite the bullet and remind Xiao Heng.
"Your Majesty, the time has come..."
Xiao Heng didn't say anything, got up and strode towards the door.
He had just stepped out the door when he suddenly heard Gu Xi calling out from behind him.
"Wait..." Gu Xi hurriedly chased after him, her voice tinged with urgency.
Xiao Heng paused, about to turn around, thinking that as long as she said she regretted it and wanted him to stay, he could pretend she never said those words.
But all he heard her say was, "Steward Zhao, can you tell me where those two palace maids are now?"
She had no other choice but to ask Zhao Fuquan for help. In such a vast palace, how long would it take for her to find it by herself?
“This…” Zhao Fuquan glanced at Xiao Heng, hesitating to speak.
This is really putting Consort Gu in a difficult position. How could he dare to speak without His Majesty's permission?
"Tell her." Xiao Heng said this and left without looking back.
Zhao Fuquan told him a place and hurriedly chased after it.
Gu Xi stood there, watching Xiao Heng's figure gradually disappear, feeling a sense of bewilderment.
There was no future for her and him.
Back inside, she looked at the bowl of steaming porridge on the table, and suddenly a tear slid down her cheek and dripped into the bowl.
She recalled that morning, when things had turned out similarly, and they had parted on bad terms.
The only difference is that he will never come again.
“Your Majesty, the Emperor…” Cailian hesitated, not knowing what had happened between the two. She wanted to say that she could see the Emperor’s true feelings for her, so why was her unwilling to accept him? But seeing Gu Xi’s bewildered expression, she swallowed her words.
"Cailian, go to Cining Palace and ask for a few days' leave for me. Tell her I'm not feeling well and don't want to pass on my illness to the Empress Dowager." She's in such a state that it's really not appropriate for her to see anyone. Besides, she needs to make the pills as soon as possible in the next few days, and the palace maids probably don't have the means to brew the medicinal soup.
"Yes, Your Majesty."
Gu Xi returned to her room and sat for a while, then forced herself to be alert and instructed Hua Yue to inquire about the current situation of the two palace maids.
An hour later, Huayue returned with news that the two palace maids were now working as menial laborers in the laundry department and had been given a drug to make them mute.
Gu Xi breathed a sigh of relief upon hearing this. Fortunately, they had only administered medicine and not removed her tongue; otherwise, she would have been powerless to help.
"Zhuyin, when will Physician Mu come to take your pulse this month?"
"Miss, according to the date, it should be tomorrow."
"Okay." She instructed Zhuyin to prepare all the tools for making the pills, and now she was just waiting for Physician Mu to come tomorrow.
at night.
Gu Xi tossed and turned in bed, unable to sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was Xiao Heng's gaze as he looked at her before he left. She finally managed to fall asleep, but then suddenly woke up in the middle of the night. As she tossed and turned, a tear slid down her cheek, tasting salty and bitter.
It wasn't a dream after all.
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Author's Note: It seems I can't just torture the male lead; I feel so sorry for the female lead! [crying emoji]
Thank you so much for the nutrient solution, little cutie Tu Jin! [starry eyes]
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