Chapter 53 Chapter 53 Confession丨Dinner Shura Field
Quanxingai is a little confused. Where did this group of people named Waiji come from?
"Oh my, GD senior, Taeyang senior, hello, I'm Ahn So-seop." The silly Bichon was still excited that he had met Big Bang and the music producers. He also felt that his luck was so good today that he successfully made an appointment with Star Love and came to 37 senior's store and met him in person!
"Teddy senior, 37 senior, your Korean restaurant is really amazing and very unique." An Xiaoxie continued to greet the musicians.
Kwon Ji-yong and Jeon Seong-ae stared at each other, Teddy and Taeyang looked like they were watching a play. Only Boss 37 patted Ahn So-seop's shoulder and said, "Hello, you look like a new actor, right? You look familiar, like I've seen you somewhere before."
"Yes, I'm an actor, but I used to be a trainee of JYP and also studied music." An Xiaoxie said modestly that everyone here can create, and he can only be regarded as the last one.
After exchanging glances with Quan Xingai and Quan Zhilong, she turned around with a smile and said, "Xiao Xie Oppa is a friend I just met. He's a classical music student and he's very talented."
"Huh? Really? You couldn't wait for your teammates to come over for dinner with your new friends after the school celebration." Kwon Ji-yong immediately followed, arms folded, a defensive look on his face. Because of the hat and mask, Jeon Seong-ae couldn't see his expression, but she could only tell that his eyes looked like they were about to burst into flames.
"If you're not active after get off work, there's something wrong with your thinking." Quan Xingai shrugged. "Will the seniors also come to the dinner?"
"Yeah, we haven't gotten together for a long time. This is our first time here at the new restaurant opened by my aunt." Teddy spoke with a playful look in his eyes as he looked back and forth at Zhilong and Xingai.
"I felt sorry for not being able to meet Xing'ai at Seoul National University just now, but I didn't expect to meet her so soon." Yongbae smiled.
He'd heard Zhilong talk about this girl so many times, but when he first met her, he had no idea she truly had a sweet, rich face, dimples at the corners of her mouth when she smiled, and she looked too young and too bold. He seemed to understand why Zhilong liked her. She was indeed like Sarah Nuna, dazzling and brilliant like the California sun.
"Senior Taeyang, is this the first time we meet? It feels like we should have met a long time ago. Bigbang is so famous." Jeon Seong-ae's understanding of Korean etiquette has finally improved compared to when she was reborn last year. She bowed skillfully to various producer seniors, and turned around to find Ahn So-seop with an expression of "You two really know each other."
"Xing Ai is a fan of Big Bang, right?" Kwon Ji-yong spoke again, breaking the eye contact between the girl and the actor, and raised his chin with a forced smile.
"What, Zhilong, you want to have dinner with your fans?" Teddy gloated, wishing the world would not be in chaos.
"It's not impossible. We want to talk about Big Bang's new song. Aren't you interested, little fan? Why don't we just go to the box inside together?" He said the first half of the sentence to Jeon Xingai with a meaningful look, and the second half of the sentence to An Xiaoxie with a smile.
"Senior, is this, is this really okay? The new song should be kept confidential." Silly Dog was still immersed in the excitement of Da Bang's new song. Although he felt that senior GD and Star Love seemed weird, when he thought about it, they were both music producers and were in the same company, so it was normal for them to be familiar with each other.
"It's okay, we're just chatting about ideas. Don't worry, Xiaoxiexi and Xingai, come to our box together. There are seats reserved for acquaintances. How can we let you sit at the door?" choice37 patted An Xiaoxie and started pulling people inside.
"Oh, is that so, Xingai, do you want to go?" An Xiaoxie didn't want to refuse his senior, but he didn't want to ruin their meal time, so he looked at Quan Xingai and let her make the decision.
"No, go talk about music. Oppa and I are eating." Quan Xingai refused decisively. What did Big Bang's music have to do with her? Kwon Ji-yong looked furious as if she had cheated on him. She didn't want to act according to his ideas.
37 was a little embarrassed to hear his junior's straightforward rejection. Teddy held his forehead and thought to himself that Quan Xingai's rock-hard temper was indeed in line with the temperament of a talented musician. Only Yongpei quickly looked at Zhilong. He felt that Zhilong was about to erupt like a volcano.
"Are you really not together? Are you on a date?" Quan Zhilong's tone sounded quite calm, but he reached out from behind to grab Quan Xingai, holding the other's wrist and not letting go.
"Ani, senior, I came here specifically to watch RIOT DOLLS's school anniversary celebration, and then asked Xingai out for dinner. I've run into her several times before and have always wanted to find a chance to get to know her properly." An Xiaoxie was extremely happy, his big white teeth shining brightly.
"Ahem, Zhilong, then, let's go into the box—" 37 put his fist to his mouth and coughed.
"Yes, let's go." Quan Zhilong was very calm, but he did not let go of his hand or move.
Quan Xingai tried hard to pull her hand that was tightly held, but found that the other party did not move at all. She supported her forehead with one hand and looked at the other party with a puzzled look. Quan Zhilong continued to have a blank expression, but still did not let go behind her back.
Alas, there is really nothing you can do about this tsundere cat. Quan Xingai sighed, "I'll go to the bathroom." She stood up on her own initiative. Quan Zhilong glanced at her and found that the girl winked at him. He then let go of her hand and followed Yongpei inside.
An Xiaoxie felt something was odd when he saw the backs of several people, but he couldn't figure out what was going on. While waiting for Xingai to have some free time, he posted a photo on his Instagram of himself and his friends watching the school anniversary celebration in the afternoon.
【It’s been a long time since I’ve experienced such a warm atmosphere. Feel the Seoul National University anniversary!】
He actually wanted to post about RD's performance, but in order to avoid suspicion, he only posted a photo with two grown men as his friends. As expected, the actors and idols have nothing to do with each other, and no fans thought that An Xiaoxie actually went to watch All Star Love.
Quan Xingai herself was dragged all the way by Quan Zhilong, and finally dragged into the bathroom - damn, it was the men's bathroom.
"Mo Ya, what's wrong with you?" Quan Xingai shook off Quan Zhilong's hand.
"I went to support you specially and waited for you for so long, but you left me to come and have dinner with this guy? If I hadn't met you, you wouldn't have thought of me at all, right?" Kwon Ji-yong turned around and stared at Xingai. His expression was not very good, and there was a hint of grievance in his eyes.
"I, you didn't tell me you were coming. It's first come, first served. Brother Xiaoxie asked me out first so I ate with him first. It's just a meal." Quan Xingai saw Quan Zhilong's angry look and felt that she had done nothing wrong. They were not in a relationship - well, why not just take this opportunity to be cold-blooded to the end.
Thinking this in her heart, Quan Xingai sighed silently and put on a strange expression: "Besides, we are just seniors and juniors, there is nothing special about it."
"Nothing special? Senior-senior relationship? Ha, Xing'ai's pond is short of people? Is An Xiaoxie your new fish? Are you tired of Song Kang and I after filming? You haven't contacted Cha Eunwoo for a long time, right? Now you've set your sights on someone new. Our Xing'ai, you really love the new and dislike the old. So what about me? Am I also on your list of people you're tired of?"
A sign saying "Under Repair" was hung in the bathroom. Kwon Ji-yong held Jeon Xingai's hand and leaned very close to her. His voice was a little cold, but his expression was full of emotion.
But his words also made Quan Xingai frown.
"Why are you so crazy? Am I going fishing with every guy? Can't I just make friends? Song Kang and Che Yinyou, I did... Forget it, why should I tell you my thoughts." Quan Xingai shook off Quan Zhilong's hand and turned to leave.
"You, you really don't have any feelings for me? Or do you really just see me as a sex buddy? Why don't you talk to me about feelings? We talk about hearts, music, art, everything, but we just avoid talking about feelings. Do you really love me so much... do you really not like me at all?" Quan Zhilong stepped forward and grabbed Xingai, lowered his eyes, and spoke pitifully.
Quan Xingai's heart was gripped, and distress flashed in her eyes. She was always easily confused by Quan Zhilong's pitiful appearance, because he was very important and special. It was because of this special feeling that Quan Xingai did not want to step into the same river again.
Love is too fragile and ethereal. After a wonderful beginning, the past love and happiness can be exhausted in just a few years.
In my previous life, I spent four long years in love with Kwon Ji-yong. The first two years were both in Japan, which were the happiest two years of our time together. Then, with work, they both became busier and busier, sometimes we didn't see each other for a month. At the same time, we had to be careful of various media, paparazzi, and stalkers... After two years of long-distance relationship, our feelings were still consumed by the long separation.
Arguing, reconciling, and so on.
At that time, she was becoming increasingly annoyed because she had no inspiration for her new album. Not wanting to be trapped in a cycle of quarrels and reconciliations, she broke up with him. Kwon Ji-yong tried to save the relationship several times, but they eventually broke up completely. Ridiculous, Jeon Star Love got new inspiration for music because of the breakup, and even started a vicious cycle of falling in love, breaking up, falling in love again, and breaking up again in the next three years.
She knew very well that her relationship with Quan Zhilong could not continue to be ambiguous, but she could not resist Zhilong, so she kept pretending not to know the truth and kept avoiding thinking about her relationship with Quan Zhilong until he exposed her and she had to retreat.
It is precisely because Zhilong is special that she no longer wants to bind each other with love.
"You are a superstar, you are surrounded by thousands of loves, Zhilong, you just have an illusion of falling in love, you just have an obsession because you can't get it. You don't like me, you just have an illusion." After a while, Quan Xingai looked up at Quan Zhilong's eyes and said.
"Illusion?" Quan Zhilong asked her in disbelief, but Quan Xingai turned her face away, her expression also full of sadness.
"Yes, I'm going out."
"Look at me and tell me you don't like me." Kwon Ji-yong held Jeon Xingai's face with both hands, nose to nose, getting closer and closer.
"Oh my, why is it undergoing maintenance?" An Xiaoxie's voice appeared at the door.
The two people in the bathroom were unaware of the situation, only the sound of heavy breathing flowed between each other. Quan Xingai tried her best to control her expression. She didn't want to show sadness, heartache, or reluctance. She just looked at each other quietly, with her hands clenched into fists behind her back.
"Okay, you said you like me, so do you like Xing Ai or Sarah? Can you tell who I am?" Xing Ai turned her head away and asked in the same unhappily.
Then Quan Zhilong was stunned, and then he chuckled softly, "It's all an excuse. You just use this excuse to reject me."
"Whether it's an excuse or not, only Zhilong himself knows. Who are you thinking of when you look at Xingai?" Quan Xingai also said with emotion.
She is not a fool. From the series of mistakes on New Year's Eve to the month she stayed in Japan, and even now, doesn't she know that Kwon Ji-yong is looking for his past?
Is he in love or looking for a replacement? Although Sarah is also her, she is now a star lover.
Quan Xingai took deep breaths, controlling her expression and mood, and then whispered, "Thank you for your support today. I'm going out now."
As the footsteps faded away, Quan Zhilong could even hear a conversation coming from the corridor not far away.
"Xing Ai Ai, are you okay? You were in the bathroom for ages."
"An Xiaoxie, you're not coming to the bathroom to see me, are you? The women's room, please."
"Ani...what are you thinking about? I just saw you on the other side during maintenance and happened to run into you on my way back."
"Oh, I saw that too. Are you done eating? Let's go and take a walk back to the dorm."
The conversation gradually faded, and Quan Zhilong looked at himself in the mirror with a sneer. How ridiculous! At 32, he still experienced heartbreak and being dumped—no, the rejection of a confession—something that only happened a decade ago. He was Quan Zhilong, could he not have a relationship? If he didn't like her, then he didn't like her. Did Quan Xingai think he was crazy about her?
Who did she think she was? She was just Sarah's stand-in! Even if he confessed his feelings, he wasn't sincere. He... Shit, he was really a little sad.
Back in the box, he had a blank expression on his face, and his whole body exuded a sense of low pressure.
"Are you unhappy with the conversation?" Teddy was the first to step forward and step on the landmine.
"Ah, with that female idol? Zhilong, what's wrong with you?" 37 was the second one to step on the landmine.
"He's just a junior, what's there to talk about? Why that expression? I went to Neo because of President Wen's sincerity, and it has nothing to do with Jeon Seol-ae." Kwon Ji-yong said coldly.
"..." Teddy choked and looked at Yongbae.
"Are you okay Zhilong?"
"I'm fine, nothing to worry about. Let's talk about work." Quan Zhilong smiled, very faintly, and then switched to a serious working state, as if he was back to when he was in Waiji, being a pure workaholic.
The others looked at each other in confusion. 37, who didn't know anything about the relationship between Kwon Ji-yong and Jeon Seong-ae, didn't think anything was wrong, so he spoke up, "Release it next spring? Let's choose something from our archive. I heard a pretty good song from Kush the other day, but it needs new lyrics."
"Is it the song with a sad atmosphere that Taeyang wanted to ask Kush for before?" Teddy asked.
“Yes, that’s the one.”
"Isn't that a bit too sad?"
"Let's just use that song. I'll rewrite the lyrics. Anyway, the current situation is suitable for a tune that prioritizes melody and has a bit of sadness. After this song is released, I don't know what will happen in the future." Kwon Ji-yong spoke softly while looking at the deep blue summer night outside the window. His expression made people feel inexplicably sad.
"Everything is possible for Big Bang's future, don't be discouraged." Choice37 said optimistically.
Dong Yongpei looked at his friend quietly. He looked depressed and about to be overwhelmed by sadness, but the two of them had few opportunities to meet now, and he gradually developed a sense of unfamiliarity with Zhilong. Even if he wanted to say something caring, he didn't know where to start.
Kwon Ji-yong's mind was a mess, his emotional setbacks leaving him with mixed emotions. The melody of Big Bang's upcoming comeback song was already resonating in his mind, the poetic lyrics flowing through his heart like water.
Thousands of inspirations blossomed from sadness and grief, but he did not feel happy:
The brilliant things always come to mind
The good times are fleeting
The flowing water is ruthlessly dyed red
covered in bruises
*
"You, are you and GD senior okay?" On the way back, the two of them were walking fully armed in the deserted alleys of the residential area. An Xiaoxie thought about it and asked.
He was not completely unaware. There seemed to be some atmosphere flowing between GD senior and Xingai.
"It's okay." Quan Xingai smiled. She was a mature adult and she could control her emotions.
"You two look very familiar with each other. Senior, you didn't change companies because of you, did you?" An Xiaoxie thought for a moment and asked indirectly what the relationship between Xingai and GD was.
"What do you want to ask?" Quan Xingai was not in a good mood at the moment, but still looked at An Xiaoxie politely and restrainedly and asked.
In the still-scorching heat of September, dusk had already fallen. The remaining cicadas of summer still chirped deafeningly in the trees. The night breeze brought the coolness of autumn and the fragrance of gardenias. An Xiaoxie could only see Xing Ai's exposed eyes, silent and able to see through his thoughts.
"Are you dating GD sunbaenim?"
"Dating? Where did you come to this conclusion, An Xiaoxie?"
"I don't know, it's just a feeling. After GD senior appeared, it seemed like you two formed your own barrier, isolating yourself from everyone else." An Xiaoxie scratched his head, thought about it, and expressed his feelings.
Quan Xingai was stunned for a moment and said lightly, "It's just an illusion. He hates me and thinks I'm a witch or a sea king who likes to flirt with different people everywhere."
"Is that so? No, Xingai is not that kind of person." This time it was An Xiaoxie's turn to be surprised. Quan Xingai said those words without any fluctuation in her tone, and she was not worried at all that others would misunderstand her.
In fact, after coming out of the store just now, An Xiaoxie felt that Quan Xingai seemed unhappy, but she did not show any abnormality at all. She was still full of energy and talked to him about classical music and high school, from the unfamiliarity of moving from North America to Seoul to becoming an actor and filming. But his sixth sense felt that Xingai was sad and unhappy.
"You just met me, how do you know I'm not that kind of person? I've had scandals with Song Kang, Cha Eun-woo, and Kwon Ji-ryong. Maybe I'm just that kind of Poseidon." Quan Xingai shrugged and walked forward on her own.
"Are you in a bad mood? Xingai seems very sad." An Xiaoxie stood still and spoke softly behind Quan Xingai.
Quan Xingai paused, lowered her head and didn't answer, then turned to the other person with a smile, "Why am I sad?"
The evening breeze rustled through the trees, and the girl clenched her hands into fists behind her back.
"It's good that you're not unhappy. In fact, I saw you the first time you went to the theater. Everyone else was gathered in groups or walking in twos or threes, but you were the only one strolling leisurely at the back. Even when the teachers and other students were looking at you, you didn't rush at all. You walked at your own pace. That was when I remembered Xing Ai immediately."
An Xiaoxie figured Jeon Xingai probably didn't want to talk about it, so he didn't ask, instead recounting the first time he'd met her. At the time, he was studying stage performance at the theater, and later heard from actors that Seoul had come to observe their rehearsals late in the afternoon as a practical lesson. He sat in the corner of the last row, watching the theater doors open and a group of students walk in. The girl at the end of the line was still carrying the brilliant golden light from outside.
She seemed to glow.
"One time, the violinist in the theater band took a leave of absence, and a friend asked me to fill in. Actually, I hadn't played the violin in years at that time. Before the official start, I wanted to practice quickly, but you saw me and laughed at me. What a coincidence, isn't it?"
"It's not that bad, I just haven't practiced for a long time." Quan Xingai showed a sincere smile, and then she saw An Xiaoxie's serious eyes, and thought to herself that the situation seemed not good -
"Actually, I fell in love with you the first time I saw you, but I didn't want to cause you any trouble, so this is just a simple confession. Please don't back off - I know we just met. Today I went to see your performance. The Star Love on the stage was even more dazzling. I can't seem to hold back my heartbeat and can't wait to tell you, Quan Xing Ai xi, I want to pursue you."
The man stood straight, and after he finished speaking, he looked at Quan Xingai quietly. His heartbeat was like a drum, almost drowning out all the sounds of the summer night.
"...You, you're so sudden. I'm not mentally prepared at all." Quan Xingai touched the mask on her face, adjusted the hat on her head, unlocked and locked her phone, and then put it back in her pocket. After finishing this awkward process, she sighed and looked at the street light not far away.
"Look at that lampshade, there are so many moths lying on it," Her eyes were fixed on those little lives flying blindly around the light, without looking at each other, nor giving An Xiaoxie room to interrupt, "Look at them flapping their wings, aren't they stupid? They know the light is scorching, but they still stubbornly fly into it." Her words were like an invisible and soft wall.
"Perhaps they need this moment of light to brighten up an entire bleak summer?" An Xiaoxie grinned, revealing his large white teeth. His smile was naive, his eyes surprisingly resolute. He didn't like to overthink things; he just said what he liked, and he wasn't discouraged by rejection. The current situation was completely within his expectations. Xing Ai had only just met him, and he was an idol, on the rise in his career. It was normal for her to refuse.
"What a silly little dog." Quan Xingai was infected by the other party's grinning face and couldn't help but smile too. Then he looked at the moth on the street lamp still flying into the lampshade non-stop.
"Ah, I, hey, I don't want to cause you trouble, Xingai, you can be yourself, I just expressed my feelings." An Xiaoxie felt embarrassed after confessing his feelings. He messed up his hair awkwardly, and continued to speak when he saw the other party smiling.
Two confessions in one night. What was today? Valentine's Day? Quan Xingai looked up at the starry sky. The city lights made her unable to see anything. But even if there were stars, they couldn't help her solve the problem at hand. The Bichon Frise standing before her was still looking at her with blinking eyes, expectantly.
"Thank you for your love, but I can only apologize... I'm here, so goodbye..." Quan Xingai doesn't like to reject others, nor does she like to have conflicts with others. She likes a harmonious and pleasant environment, but when things developed to this point, she had to talk things over with An Xiaoxie directly.
He is different from Song Chang. Song Chang understood that her unspoken rejection had room for maneuver, but An Xiaoxie rushed forward without leaving any room for maneuver or retreat.
"Can I still date you? Do I still have a chance?" The puppy running around still had an expectant look on his face.
"...wait until I'm done with work. You know, I'm going to release an album, so I'll probably be very busy." Quan Xingai returned to his polite social mode and skillfully made excuses.
"Yes, okay, I'll wait for you to finish your work." The smiling little Bichon Frise now looks like a giant poodle, and although big, it is gentle and warm.
Quan Xingai waved and entered the building. She leaned quietly against the wall in the corridor, closed her eyes and enjoyed the quiet of her own space. She had quit smoking for more than half a year, but she wanted to smoke again today.
An Xiaoxie's confession still lingered in her ears, but Quan Xingai's mind was filled with Quan Zhilong's angry, longing eyes. "Look at you, Sarah, you're such a heartless person! It's just love, what's the big deal? We were in love for a lifetime, and we had so many exes. Why are you so hesitant now? Your old lover doesn't want to rekindle their past, and your little one doesn't want to fall in love with you either."
Yes, All Star Love, All Star Love, what on earth do you want to do?
She self-analyzed herself with self-deprecation, and finally found out with regret that she probably had PTSD emotions about love. She seemed to have become a bad woman who only fanned the flames but did not add fuel to the fire.
The phone vibrated in her pocket, and Jeon Seong-ae picked it up listlessly. "Hyun-ho, what's wrong? Oh, I'll be at the dorm soon. New job? Great, I need a lot of work right now. Tokyo Fashion Week? Great, perfect, this is exactly what I need. Can I leave tomorrow? Oh, no, no, I get it."
Quan Xingai hung up the phone and breathed a sigh of relief. She would go to Tokyo to attend Fashion Week next week. First, she would meet with Ms. Rei Kawakubo to discuss advertising cooperation, and then watch the shows of Junya Watanabe and emerging designer Tomo Koizumi at the official fashion week. Perhaps there will be new cooperation in the future.
Thinking about work, Quan Xingai regained some spirit, and soon she realized that it was impossible for her to attend Jun'ya Watanabe's show after meeting with Kawakubo. Others may not know, but Quan Xingai knew very well that Watanabe was Kawakubo's subordinate before, and left Kawakubo in 1994 to establish his own brand.
Kawakubo generously released Watanabe, but they never met again after 1994.
Quan Xingai simply called Wu Xianhao again to tell him about this matter. With work to worry about, her messy love life was finally put behind her.
*
After returning home, Quan Zhilong kept replaying in his mind every detail of his whole year of knowing Quan Xingai, from resistance to being unable to resist, from dislike to being unable to hate, this girl gave him infinite intimacy and security in her personality and everything she did, but today she chose someone else. Quan Zhilong is a competitive person, and he will not allow himself to be the one chosen.
But now, it really happened. Since being rejected by Jin Zhener in high school, this is the second woman he rejected so thoroughly and indecently.
But the more hateful thing is that he still thinks about her, and even because of her rejection, Quan Zhilong has more possessiveness and competitiveness, but his self-esteem tells him that everything is over, he doesn't want to care about Quan Xingai, and he won't take the initiative to look for her again. Quan Zhilong childishly gave birth to a lot of messy thoughts -
Find 100 girlfriends and make them mad;
Post 100 ambiguous photos on social media to let everyone know they are flirting;
When she was interviewed, she simply and bluntly said that she hated All Star Love;
Write more than a dozen songs to diss her;
…
Quan Zhilong had no choice but to throw away all these unreliable and naive ideas, and finally called his new studio and new agent Li Zaixu,
"I'll be going to Paris Fashion Week a few days early next week. Please send me the media schedule so I can pick a few media outlets to interview. I also have a dinner with the editor-in-chief of Vogue the day after tomorrow. Well, I'm planning to start my activities. I should have a schedule in the second half of the year. Let's discuss the specific schedule when we meet tomorrow. Thank you for your hard work."
After arranging a bunch of work, he leaned on the sofa with his cat in his arms and stared blankly.
"Zoa, a cruel woman rejected me..."
“But she’s very talented in music…”
"I like the wild and imaginative nonsense, but it's very interesting, isn't it?"
"And we sleep very well together... well, no matter what kind of sleep we have, whether it's vegetarian or meaty, we're very compatible..."
"She's very smart. She's from Seoul National University. Her Japanese is at the level of a local. She's made astonishing progress in Chinese after studying it for six months..."
"She looks a lot like Nuna, uncanny, but she said I was just looking for a double, a shadow—no, no, no, no... right..."
"But no matter what, how could she choose someone else between me and that brat?? Ah...zoa, I won't continue to like her...right...no..."
"But I'm really happy to be with her. Iye, are you asking me to give up? Zoa, are you asking me to think about it carefully?"
"Yes, I really need to thoroughly sort out my feelings towards Quan Xing'ai."
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com