Chapter 2. To her, a eunuch was no different from a normal person...
Hua Lang couldn't remember Zhan Yunmei's background anymore. He tried hard to recall, but he could only remember her kneeling at the end of the court, bowing her head in submission.
He didn't understand what attracted her to him.
The kiss was devoid of any emotion or skill. Hua Lang simply treated himself as a plaything, yet he couldn't understand why anyone would keep a eunuch as a pet.
"Don't try to kill yourself, okay?" Zhan Yunmei squeezed Hua Lang's fingertips. He seemed to have been tortured on his fingers. None of his ten fingers were intact. At best, the skin and flesh were torn; at worst, the nails were peeled off. Looking at him, she was somewhat worried. "I will ask the physician to come to the mansion again tomorrow. Your hands are very beautiful. Don't let them become useless."
Hua Lang tried to adjust to the shallow kiss, but he couldn't. He couldn't adjust at all. Her face seemed to still be in front of him, making him want to explode with anger, but also filled with shame and indignation. After taking several deep breaths, he slowly raised his eyelids and asked, "You like these hands?"
Zhan Yunmei nodded, "Mm."
After a moment of silence, Hua Lang suddenly pulled his hands away and knelt in front of the bedside table, rummaging through something. Zhan Yunmei gently pulled his forearm, "What are you looking for?"
"Scissors, chop off these hands," Hua Lang said. "Or just let me go. Stop pretending here, it disgusts me."
“There are no sharp weapons here,” Zhan Yunmei said, ignoring his words. Instead, she grabbed his chin, lifted it high, and said seriously, “If you go out, you will die. How many people outside are hoping for your death? You can’t even try to die here.”
She was right. Who wouldn't want him dead? He was the biggest remnant of the previous dynasty, hated by everyone. He lowered his eyes, becoming calmer than before, and asked, "Why are you imprisoning me?"
“Imprisoned? Is this a prison?” Zhan Yunmei frowned in disapproval, released him, and got up to leave. “Don’t you understand? I want you, I want you as a person. Go to sleep peacefully. No one here wants you dead, and I will not force you to do anything degrading.”
Hua Lang stared intently at Zhan Yunmei's retreating figure. After she opened the door, she looked at him and smiled gently in response to his resentment.
During his days of house arrest, he had very few activities. He could only walk around in the empty room or lie down. He once tried to commit suicide, and the bed curtains on the canopy bed were taken away. Zhan Yunmei also forbade him from going to the courtyard anymore.
Every day, Yao Shuniang would bring him food. Hua Lang tried to run out the moment she entered the room. He did run out, but there were even more guards outside. The moment he came out, all eyes were on him. If he dared to take another step forward, someone would grab him and take him back to his room.
The helplessness of being imprisoned is greater than sitting in prison.
.
Incense was burning in the Chaotian Hall. It was cheap incense that wasn't very valuable, and sometimes it was quite pungent if you burned too much. Zhan Yunmei couldn't stand the smell, but since the new emperor had ascended the throne and the court was short of money, they couldn't afford any expensive incense, so she kept quiet.
This palace was used for the emperor's daily government affairs, and all the court officials met with the emperor here. Today, the emperor specially invited Zhan Yunmei to the palace, drafted an imperial edict, and conferred upon Zhan Yunmei the title of General of the Cloud Cavalry, bestowed upon her a gold and silver mansion, as well as some land, and granted her the special right to enter the court for matters other than major military and political affairs.
Several officials from the Six Ministries also came to the hall to discuss the future official system of the new dynasty. Zhan Yunmei listened perfunctorily for a few minutes, then excused herself and left, letting them handle the division of military power. She did not swagger around in the discussion.
The emperor granted Zhan Yunmei the authority to command the imperial guards. In times of war, she would lead the troops and command them. In times of peace, she would oversee the training. After leaving the Chaotian Hall, she would instruct the palace servants to convey the emperor's message and then head to the training ground.
The Imperial Guard's training ground stretched as far as the eye could see, its earthen walls and fences piled high with snow. Zhan Yunmei signaled for her token and entered to get a general understanding of the situation.
The new dynasty had only been established for a short time, so there was no rush to train troops. The most important thing was to stabilize the military situation. Zhan Yunmei confirmed the supply of military pay and instructed her deputy general, Chen, to reward the generals who had made contributions to the founding of the dynasty.
"General Zhan, the founding war has caused widespread suffering and financial ruin, yet you're still here rewarding military merits?" A man in silver armor stepped forward, clearly displeased with Zhan Yunmei's behavior, but since she had rendered meritorious service, he softened his tone.
After giving instructions to Deputy General Chen, Zhan Yunmei looked at the newcomer, raised an eyebrow, and asked, "And you are?"
“I am Geng Qi, the deputy commander of the Fifth Army Camp,” Geng Qi said, showing his ivory token.
Zhan Yunmei lowered her eyes slightly to examine the soldiers, then smiled and said, "Deputy Geng, there are a large number of soldiers here who were transferred to the Beijing Garrison from my side. They have made contributions to the founding of the country and should be rewarded accordingly. Does the national treasury deficit mean that the soldiers' merits should be wasted?"
That's true, but Geng Qi was inexplicably annoyed. Perhaps it was because Zhan Yunmei had proposed rewarding military merits first. In any case, he didn't approve of women joining the army. Although he wasn't in the ranks of those who fought in the founding war, he didn't believe that the woman in front of him was a founding minister.
But she held a high position and wielded great power, so how could he possibly contend with her? He could only sigh, "You are right."
Zhan Yunmei was efficient and decisive in her work, which annoyed Geng Qi. Suddenly, he remembered that an official from the Ministry of Justice had invited him to drink, so he found an excuse to leave the training ground.
The two met at a restaurant in the city. Geng Qi was in a bad mood and got drunk. After paying the bill, he left the restaurant, staggered and couldn't find the right way. He walked along the wall and ended up at the General's Mansion. Not wanting to be unlucky, he was about to turn around when he heard a noise. He turned around and knocked. A person dressed in white crawled out of the side room of the General's Mansion. The person's hair was disheveled and he looked like a ghost crawling. Geng Qi was so frightened that he turned pale.
He fled in panic, not knowing where he was going, and bumped into Zhan Yunmei who was returning from the training ground. Without thinking, he turned and left.
Deputy General Chen glanced at Geng Qi and chuckled, "He said he was going home to see his son who had a fever during the day, but I didn't expect him to go drinking. He reeks of alcohol, what a drunkard!"
"What was he saying?" Zhan Yunmei gazed at Geng Qi's departing figure from afar.
“What the hell?” Deputy General Chen said. “Cowardly, and he’s still a deputy!”
Zhan Yunmei looked in the direction Geng Qi had come from. The alley went deep into the alley with only a few houses. If she had to say, that was a side room of her mansion. After thinking for a while, she said, "You go back first. I'll go take a look over there."
Deputy General Chen then laughed out loud, "General, you actually believe something like that..."
Halfway through his sentence, a glimpse of white appeared in his peripheral vision. Deputy General Chen slowly shut his mouth. Just as he was about to say something to Zhan Yunmei, Zhan Yunmei strode forward and grabbed the glimpse of white.
Seeing Zhan Yunmei angrily grabbing the man, Deputy General Chen roughly sensed something and casually declined to get involved in her private affairs.
"Did I not explain myself clearly enough, or do you not understand what I'm saying?" Zhan Yunmei took off her outer robe and hung it on the clothes rack, revealing a plain white inner garment that looked like she was only wearing a nightgown.
She added charcoal to the stove and ordered someone to seal the bathroom window before Zhan Yunmei walked to the bedside, untied Hua Lang's ankles, but kept his hands bound.
His nightgown was so worn and wrinkled that it was a far cry from the dignified appearance he had in the previous dynasty.
"Didn't I hire an embroiderer? Where are the clothes?" Zhan Yunmei reached out to tidy Hua Lang's messy hair, but he suddenly turned his head away, gritting his teeth and refusing to speak.
Faced with Hua Lang's unyielding spirit, Zhan Yunmei remained silent for a long time, leaning against the headboard without saying a word.
The first time I saw Hua Lang was at the Chaotian Hall. At that time, the Northern Mongols were in turmoil, and the emperor summoned all the civil and military officials to the hall for a meeting. Hua Lang stood to the left and behind the dragon throne, his back ramrod straight, with only his neck and shoulders slightly hunched, looking like a respectful and submissive servant. Zhan Yunmei was at the end of the officials' ranks and saw from afar his deep brows and eyes, with an unyielding gloom between them.
Zhan Yunmei didn't know what this feeling was like, she only found that her heart was beating faster than usual. In the following days, when she went to court to discuss important matters, her attention was on his face.
Later, when she led her army to the north of Mongolia, Zhan Yunmei had few opportunities to see Hua Lang. The next time she saw him was after the pacification of the region. Whenever she thought of him, his face was clearly imprinted in her mind. Zhan Yunmei had heard from others that such things usually involved lusting after a man's body.
To her, the body of a eunuch was no different from that of an ordinary person.
The most common look Zhan Yunmei had ever seen Hua Lang was one of gloomy expression, just like now. His past appearance overlapped with his present one. She looked at him and said, "You always need to prepare clothes. Are you going to wear your nightgown all the time?"
Hua Lang chuckled mockingly, "What? Are you going to force me if I refuse?"
“Force you? I told you I wouldn’t force you,” Zhan Yunmei pulled open the bedside table, took out a measuring tape, and helped Hua Lang up from the couch. He struggled, and she immediately slapped him with her palm. He felt the pain and curled up, not moving around.
Zhan Yunmei knelt on the couch with one knee, leaned down, wrapped the measuring tape around his waist, and compared the length. "What do you mean by forcing you? I'm just measuring your body."
She moved very gently, measuring his body through his thin clothes, and quickly memorized his measurements. She didn't get intimate with him, which surprised him. He thought she was going to come over and make advances on him like yesterday.
After taking the measurements, Zhan Yunmei had someone bring in the medicine for the finger injury, untied his hands, and had Yao Shuniang briefly explain how to use the medicine before leaving.
Hua Lang was taken aback.
He thought he would be severely punished by her for running away, but to his surprise, apart from reminding him that he would die if he ran away, she said nothing and did nothing, and even patiently measured his body.
It seemed as if she truly wanted nothing from him and only wanted to be good to him.
But is that even possible? Would anyone believe it if I told them?
Even if she were true, so what? Reliance is never a guarantee. He relied on others his whole life, for over twenty years on the emperor. If the emperor fell, wouldn't he fall immediately? The most useless thing in the world is reliance.
Anger surged up, and Hua Lang smashed the medicine bowl. The porcelain bowl shattered into pieces the moment it hit the ground, the crisp sound of breaking echoing, but no one paid any attention to him.
The next morning, Yao Shuniang sent people in to clean up the mess. Hua Lang was lying on the ground with his hair disheveled and hanging down. A shard of broken porcelain was less than half a finger's distance from his throat.
Yao Shuniang panicked for a moment, but quickly confirmed that he hadn't cut himself. She then called for someone to carry him to the bed. When they left, he finally moved and was finally willing to make a request to her.
Hua Lang lay on his side on the couch, weakly saying, "Call Zhan Yunmei over, I want to see her."
Yao Shuniang hesitated, and Hua Lang looked up and stared at her. She met his long, narrow, upturned eyes and was stunned by the fierce light in them.
"Please wait until dinner time; the general will be back around then."
Hua Lang continued, "Then you should ask someone to tell her that I want to go for a walk in the courtyard, and that keeping me locked up in the room will drive her crazy."
Yao Shuniang remained silent.
"What, you can't even make such a small request?"
Yao Shuniang nodded, "This servant will send someone to deliver the message immediately."
When Zhan Yunmei heard that Hua Lang had spent the night with a pile of broken porcelain shards but hadn't tried to kill himself, she was quite relieved and agreed to all of Hua Lang's trivial requests.
So every night when she returned home, she would see him sitting in the courtyard, lifeless. She wasn't very satisfied, but she was still happy.
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