Shen Jiao: "???"
Why didn't you say something about something so life-or-death sooner? If you had said so earlier, would this have happened? Besides, you're a grown man, being touched a couple of times by a stunningly beautiful woman—it's a win-win situation!
Besides, I didn't say anything when you touched me back then, you hypocrite!
However, you can't touch a tiger's backside. A tyrant's backside is indeed extraordinary. A true man can bend and stretch. Shen Jiao's greatest strength is that he dares to face his mistakes, repent, and start anew.
She continued to cling to the tyrant's leg as if nothing had happened, seamlessly transitioning to a tearful outpouring of snot, "Your Majesty, I was wrong! You are intelligent, wise, and exceptionally talented. You must have seen that this was not my intention. It was all a misunderstanding, a complete misunderstanding! It was all because of that poison that secretly interfered with my mind, causing me to make a fatal mistake. Otherwise, even if the King of Heaven himself were here, I wouldn't dare to be so audacious as to touch your precious dragon's rear end!"
The dragon's roar struck Ji Yan's brain directly. His face darkened. "Let go."
Shen Jiao held on tightly, "No."
Ji Yan: "To spit or not?"
Shen Jiao: "No, I won't spill it. If I spill it, you will definitely cut off my hand."
"You've reminded me." Ji Yan stared at her for a moment, then smiled sinisterly and dragged her outside. "I'll go get my sword now and chop off your poisoned claws."
Shen Jiao: "..." I really wanted to punch myself twice for always talking so much!
But, is Ji Yan's poison expired? Could it be leftover stock? I wonder if it's moldy? Why is it taking so long to take effect? According to classic TV drama tropes, she should have died from vomiting blood long ago, so why is there still no sign of it?
Please let it happen quickly! Because she simply cannot bear the cruelty that is about to unfold.
Shen Jiao hung on Ji Yan's leg like a weightless pendant, and was easily carried to the door.
Did she eat three bowls of rice every meal for nothing? She immediately let go, shifted her affections to a nearby pillar, sniffled, and said, "Calm down, Your Majesty. Think about it carefully. Without my hands, how will I complete the important task of assassinating you in the future?"
Ji Yan ignored her: "You still have feet."
Shen Jiao: "But my feet are useless, not as useful as my hands."
Ji Yan easily pulled her off the pillar. "Then cut off her feet."
Shen Jiao: "..."
At this moment, she seriously suspected that Chen Bao and Wang Dazhuang were acting against her will. They made her sound so powerful and awesome, but what happened? She was just dragged around like a kitten or a puppy by a tyrant? Easier than dusting off a feather duster?
Ji Yan glanced at her. The thoughts of the hamster were especially easy to understand, and everything in her mind was written on her face. "I said, no one in the world can beat me. It's normal that you are weak compared to me."
It's common for people to be weaker than him, nothing unusual, but compared to others, Shen Jiao is just so-so.
Shen Jiao: "???" You plotted to poison me, and you were so eager to chop off my hand, and now you're mocking me? You're a max-level host, always bullying me, a weak and helpless outsider, shameless!
Ji Yan then used her eyes to express her mockery even more directly before continuing to carry her out with an iron-fisted expression.
Shen Jiao: "..." Enough, protecting our hands is the priority.
From this angle, clinging to his leg would be far-fetched, so she did a somersault and hooked her hand around the tyrant's neck, burying her head deep in his neck and nuzzling him, just like that day in the stands.
Ji Yan paused in her steps.
The hamster's fur was soft and its breath was warm and gentle. In a direction that Shen Jiao couldn't see, its expression suddenly became strange.
She nuzzled her nose again, mainly because it was inexplicably itchy and she couldn't free her hands for a moment. She couldn't help but say, "Your Majesty..."
Ji Yan patted her back: "Give it another little push."
At this time, the tyrant's temper was unpredictable. Shen Jiao was worried that his hands would shake while clapping, so she simply gave him a set of Nine Yin White Bone Claws and hurriedly and earnestly bowed to him.
"Wrong pressure, try again." The tyrant slapped the back of her head again.
Are you crazy?! Isn't this supposed to be improvised? How would she know what kind of intensity the tyrant prefers?
Shen Jiao was exhausted. She tried again and again, but failed each time. From a distance, her posture looked frivolous. Wang Fu glanced at her from afar and thought, "Goodness, this young man really knows how to have fun." He was so happy that he turned around and left.
The two of them are already very affectionate. If things continue at this pace, how far away is the day when they will have a little prince?
Shen Jiao had no idea what Wang Fu was thinking. All she knew was that her forehead was almost rubbed raw. Emperor Ji was five stars in terms of how difficult he was to coax.
Finally, when she sported a fluffy, voluminous "bird's nest" hairstyle, the tyrant gave a signal of satisfaction.
Shen Jiao thought to herself, "Finally, I can rest."
Ji Yan: "Why aren't you moving? Hurry up, keep going at this intensity."
Shen Jiao: "..." Damn, I really want to bang my head against him and kill him.
"It seems I've come at the wrong time."
At the same time, Liang Heng's gentle voice suddenly rang out from outside the door.
Shen Jiao: No, no, no, my savior, you've come at just the right time.
She slid down from the tyrant with lightning speed, jumped three steps away, and turned around to see Liang Heng standing at the door with his hair covered in wet water plants. His ethereal white robes were so dark that the color was indistinguishable. He spat out water as soon as he opened his mouth, and Shen Jiao even saw a small fish jump from his hair to the ground, hopping around.
It looks exactly like a water ghost that has been visited on the seventh day after someone's death.
Shen Jiao's expression was complicated. "Brother, is there a time tunnel underwater? How come you look like you've been dead for ten or twenty years?"
Liang Heng's face was covered in mud, and although she couldn't see his expression, she understood his look that said, "Quickly ask me what happened, I have a thousand words to complain about."
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