Chapter 312 Bamboo Heart Threefold (Supplement) "Junior Sister, you will regret this..."
"Junior sister..."
These two short words seem to contain a lot of unspoken feelings, including relief, regret, and unspeakable emotions.
He used to call Lin Feiran that often, but it seemed that she could only hear the difference today that she hadn't noticed before.
Ji Changying didn't stand behind the door for long. After a moment of eye contact, he came out, his movements noticeably hesitant. He walked slowly, and Lin Feiran immediately stepped forward to support him. He paused for a moment but did not refuse.
With her help, the two walked to the courtyard and sat down. At this moment, the spirit puppet in the shadows got up and, as if commanded, leaped onto the roof, leaving true peace in the courtyard.
Lin Feiran turned around and looked back with some surprise, but Ji Changying didn't seem to care much. Instead, she turned to look at the bright room that was filled with warmth and spoke in a joking manner, easily breaking the silence between the two of them.
"It's not too far from this house, and the damp night isn't too cold. Let's sit down and warm ourselves in the next room."
As he spoke more, his voice became fully revealed, no longer as clear and melodious as before, but with a hint of low hoarseness that was hard to ignore.
Lin Feiran withdrew her hand and sat down. When she was standing in front of the door, she actually had a lot to say, but now that she actually saw him, she didn't know where to start. She just looked at him quietly, her fingertips unconsciously rubbing the belt around her waist.
Ji Changying stared at her for a few moments, then couldn't help but chuckle: "You were quite imposing when you threw the jade token, and you looked quite impressive standing in front of my door. Why aren't you saying a word now... You're still the same as before."
The house on the left still radiated heat, like a blazing fire, illuminating the two people's profiles.
Lin Feiran remained silent for a moment before asking the question that concerned her most: "Senior brother, how are you feeling?"
Ji Changying didn't shy away from the topic. She raised her hand to touch the fine mark between her eyebrows and said with a smile, "This? It's alright. The reason my body feels weak is because I haven't fully recovered yet. I'll be able to walk freely again in a few days."
Lin Feiran stared straight at him, but her gaze was somewhat unfocused. She pursed her lips for a moment, then stood up abruptly: "Senior brother, I'm sorry."
Her movement was so sudden that she knocked aside the flowers and leaves that had been painstakingly cultivated under the tree. Ji Changying was also startled for a moment. She opened her eyes slightly, looked up at her, blinked, and couldn't help but find it a little funny. She still raised her hand and pushed the branches and leaves next to her to the back.
"What makes you say that?"
Lin Feiran felt even more guilty: "A few days ago in the demon realm, I was only focused on setting up the formation, completely disregarding your feelings and only caring about myself. Not only did I expose your identity, making you afraid to stay in the demon capital any longer, but I also said those cold and harsh words, telling you to go and heal your wounds first..."
Upon hearing her explanation, Ji Changying couldn't help but smile, her eyebrows curving upwards like a gentle spring breeze.
"So that's what happened... I've been deceiving you for so long using Qingzhu's identity, so naturally you'd be unhappy. Besides, what's this about being exposed? You didn't tell anyone back then, not even Ruxian knew."
He raised his hand, wanting to pull Lin Feiran back to sit down, but his fingertips twitched slightly before he slowly curled them back up and lowered them, using his other hand to gesture for her to sit down, without much physical contact.
"Please sit down. You've grown so tall, it makes my neck sore from looking up at you."
Lin Feiran looked at him, and Ji Changying just smiled back, his dark eyes reflecting the bright colors in the room, like shimmering light on water, fragmented yet expansive, just as always, as if he would keep looking up until she sat back down.
She unconsciously stroked the hilt of the sword, but still sat back down.
Ji Changying nodded before continuing, "I left the Demon Capital only because I received a letter from Qi Chen. I came here to take care of Chenghua and also to recuperate from my injuries, and..."
My master has passed away; I have no reason to remain in the Demon Capital.
Neither of them mentioned "not having much time left," one because he didn't know how to bring it up, and the other because he felt it was unnecessary to say it.
She was never as at ease with Ji Changying as she was with Wei Changzai. His feelings for her were complicated; they were not just fellow disciples, but more like family, though not entirely just family.
Daohe Palace is not entirely cold-hearted in its approach to the succession of its disciples. After the grandmaster established the mountain gate, he set up many rules that were still somewhat humane.
For example, disciples whose parents are still alive can visit them once a month, without having to completely sever ties with their parents.
For example, a disciple like her, who lost both parents, would be sent to the primary school on the second day after entering the sect. One of the teachers in the school would be chosen to teach her, and this would be her personal teacher. Those with excellent aptitude might also be chosen by an elder to be his personal disciple.
Lin Feiran should have been taught by a master and raised in his palace, but she was brought back by Zhang Chunhe.
At that time, everyone thought that she, like Wei Changzai, was a disciple chosen by Zhang Chunhe, because she was indeed exceptionally talented. After returning to the mountain, she was indeed brought into his palace, which seemed to be the default assumption.
But Zhang Chunhe never said he would take her as his apprentice.
So she was like a stone thrown from both sides, unable to go left or right.
When no one was available to teach her, Zhang Chunhe entrusted her to Ji Changying.
Ji Changying led her through all the paths of Sanqing Mountain, and he taught her to identify all the spiritual plants and exotic beasts in the mountain. He was like a true older brother, taking care of her life. When she first went to the Elementary School Palace to cultivate Taoism, he came to pick her up every day.
As she grew older and her studies became busier, she developed her own childhood anxieties. Although the two were no longer as close as before, they never truly grew apart.
During holidays and breaks, everyone would return to where they were supposed to go. Even Consort Wei would be taken by Zhang Chunhe to the Supreme Palace to meditate and cultivate, in order to calm her mind. She, who was stuck in the middle, should have nowhere to go, but she didn't.
Every year, Ji Changying would prepare delicious food, hang up a corner lantern in her somewhat secluded little courtyard, and then wait for her to return.
With him around, Lin Feiran felt that she had a place to belong in Sanqing Mountain.
...
The wind rustled the shadows of the trees, but the two people at the table remained motionless.
When Zhang Chunhe's passing was mentioned, Lin Feiran finally did not shy away from it and looked at Ji Changying: "Senior brother, Qi Chen said that the Dao Master thought that your days were numbered, so the matter of you helping me was put on hold and you were not punished."
"Senior brother, I don't know much about the demon race. What does this crack represent?"
This mark was unknown not only to Lin Feiran, but also to Ru Xian.
The Lingzhu clan is extremely mysterious, with almost every generation living in seclusion. It is said that they live in Xinzai Lake in the western part of the demon realm, but no one has ever actually found them.
Not only are their clansmen few, but they are also rarely seen in the demon realm. Their ability to imitate and transform is innate, and even when they go out, they mostly rely on the characteristics of other tribes and rarely expose themselves.
They only enter the world when they want to give birth to a heart.
Lin Feiran had a vague suspicion that the crack appeared when her substitute died in the aftermath of her calamity, and that the substitute was carved from the heart of a bamboo...
Unexpectedly, Ji Changying didn't change the subject. He simply paused for a few moments and said, "Junior sister, there's no need to rush. It's been a long time since we've sat down and had a heart-to-heart talk like this. Let's take our time. Although there's no moon tonight, there's still a unique beauty to it..."
I'd like to talk to you more.
He raised his hand and flicked it, and a pot of hot tea appeared on the table. Before he could even touch it, Lin Feiran immediately took the pot and cup and poured him a cup.
He smiled silently, withdrew his hand, watched the steam gradually rise in the cup, and slowly revealed the secrets of his clan.
"The Spirit Bamboo Clan is born without a heart, but no one in the world can survive without a heart. So when we reach adolescence, we must leave our secluded place to find our own heart, otherwise, we will not live past adolescence."
He stroked the teacup, looked at the girl who had sat down and then stood up again, and couldn't help but smile: "Be patient. If I were to give you the answer directly, it would only take a sentence or two. Once I've said it, you'd be in a hurry to find a way to save me."
Even so, you still won't recognize me, and you still won't recognize Ji Changying.
He looked at Lin Feiran with his spring-like smile unchanged, and patted the edge of the table: "Sit down. I came out today because I wanted to have a good talk with you."
Lin Feiran looked at the glimmer in his eyes, pursed her lips, and sat back down.
Ji Changying nodded and pushed another cup of tea in front of her: "The place where we live, although it is called Shinsaibashi, we actually prefer to call it Hidden Land. It is a very desolate place."
The reason the clansmen live in seclusion is not only to guard against those with malicious intentions, but also, and perhaps more importantly, because they have been heartbroken and are unwilling to venture out again.
Lin Feiran looked up and saw that, just as he had expected, the two of them were sitting together, putting aside life and death, and talking properly.
Why?
Ji Changying looked at her, her eyes holding an indescribable brilliance: "Bamboo is hollow. We are born without hearts, yet due to various circumstances, we develop a worldly heart, which is not a good thing."
Having a heart means having all the desires in the world. Desires can give life, but they can also destroy it.
If one obtains what one desires, one remains in the world, finding joy and forgetting all worldly attachments; if one fails to obtain what one desires, one returns destitute to a secluded place, living a life filled with regret.
His eyelashes fluttered slightly, and he slowly withdrew his gaze from her face, taking a sip of fragrant tea.
“I grew up in a secluded place and saw many people leave in a daze and with joy, only to return dejected. When we were young, we would always pester them, asking what the outside world was like.”
They need to vent, so they talk a lot.
He paused here, his gaze falling on Lin Feiran, his eyes gentle, and only continued speaking after she drank the tea in her hand.
"I put those pains behind me and could only hear the noise and prosperity. There were countless laws, grudges and affections, and breakthroughs in cultivation outside. It was a world completely different from the hidden place."
I've always hoped that one day I could go out.
In my youth, a seven-inch-square-circle scar appeared on my chest, signifying that I must grow my own heart to continue my life, and that I could leave the hidden place.
He raised his hand and placed it on his left chest, looking at Lin Feiran: "Didn't you ask me before why there's a scar here? I said it's because a heart was growing, and these are the marks of healing. Junior sister, I didn't lie to you back then."
Lin Feiran naturally had this impression.
When they were seventeen, they went out together to kill monsters. On the way, they encountered a group of rogue cultivators attacking a person and fighting for his spiritual treasure. The two of them stepped in to help and were not injured. However, Ji Changying's magic robe was corroded by poison and was mostly destroyed, which exposed his chest.
It was actually very faint, a pale white mark that could almost blend into the skin, but Lin Feiran had good eyesight and was close by, so he immediately recognized it as a healing mark.
She was quite surprised at the time, thinking that Ji Changying had suffered a severe heart injury in the past, but he smiled and said that it was because he had grown a heart that these gaps were to allow the heart to grow better.
Such words were so absurd that Lin Feiran assumed they were just a joke to deflect attention. Since he didn't want to talk about it, she didn't press him further. Little did she know that they were all true.
Lin Feiran couldn't help but look at his left chest. Under the cover of his blue robe, apart from a decent curve, nothing else could be seen, but she still couldn't help but ask, "How did this happen?"
Ji Changying pondered for a moment and recalled, "It's like planting a melon. First, it grows to the size of a grape, then to the size of a wild fruit, and then to the size of a fist, two fists. Gradually, the heart meridian will connect with the whole body, the spiritual meridians will become complete, and the cultivation level will rise simultaneously."
He smiled and resumed his usual tone: "This is a rare sight, wouldn't you like to see it?"
Lin Feiran paused for a moment, then shook her head: "I've already seen it before."
Ji Changying withdrew her hand, glanced unintentionally at the brightly lit house, and said with a hidden meaning, "It's different now, the color is paler... I should have let you see what it looks like sooner."
Lin Feiran didn't realize that she had something more on her mind: "...Senior brother, was your bamboo heart used for something else? The cracks were there before because a heart was going to grow. Now that there are cracks, is it because the heart has been damaged?"
The atmosphere was much better than before, but Ji Changying still did not answer the question.
"Junior sister, be patient." He moved a little closer. "It's not time for 'Ji Changying' to appear yet."
"After leaving the hidden land, I traveled in the human world for a long time, carrying a bamboo hat and a bamboo staff, heading north from the Endless Sea. Along the way, I met many people and encountered many things, which were neither very good nor very bad."
I have no heart, so my experiences along the way weren't very deep; I just saw and heard things and that was it.
At that time, I wanted to go to the head of all sects, and I wanted to become a disciple of Daohe Palace to cultivate. I heard that my master taught without discrimination, and I wondered if he could help us break through the shackles of our hearts. Later, I gradually made my way to Luoyang City.
Even as he spoke, his expression remained calm, without much emotion.
"We have been living in seclusion for too long and did not know that our master had passed away. After hearing the news in Luoyang, I went up the mountain and happened to meet my master. At that time, he had just become the head monk."
He suddenly smiled.
"Back then, he wasn't the old thief you were talking about."
Ji Changying's face showed a sense of relief, yet also some other emotions: "Now, perhaps only I remember what kind of person my original master was."
"He was stubborn, but not sharp. He meticulously followed all the rules passed down from his master, yet he also possessed his own wisdom. At that time, when I wanted to join the Daohe Palace, several senior elders disagreed."
Humans and demons are incompatible. There were only a few demon disciples during the years when my master was alive. I was the first demon to join the sect after my master passed away.
He asked me, "Do you really want to join the Daohe Palace?"
I said, "I want to practice spiritual cultivation."
"He defied all opposition and accepted me as his disciple. I became his first disciple and, by virtue of this, the senior disciple of Daohe Palace."
Perhaps no one would have guessed that the revered senior brother was actually a member of the demon race.
"However, I also have a human name, with thistle as my heart and Changying as my name. From then on, there was this Changying in the world."
At this point, he coughed a few times, his voice becoming somewhat hoarse. Lin Feiran poured him some tea, and after it moistened his throat, he spoke slowly.
"Now that you know about his rebirth, since he broke the curse and revealed it, I can also say something about it."
That was my first life as his master and disciple. With his guidance, my cultivation improved rapidly, but it also reached its peak very quickly. My chest was still empty, and I could not go any further.
I didn't choose to go down the mountain; I still quite like this place and decided to stay a while longer.
"Later, many things happened, mainly my junior brother's love affairs, sometimes in the human realm, sometimes in the demon realm."
At this point, his gaze shifted slightly as he looked up at the roof, where a quiet figure sat. After a moment, he looked away.
"I watched their life and death separations like a spectator. During this long period of observation, I felt as if I was also touched, my heart was itchy, but I could never truly empathize with them."
My heart hasn't fully grown yet; I can only do what I should do as much as I can.
I helped them a lot.
"Later, Changzai and Qiutong left. The two worlds were in a period of peace and prosperity after the great war. Many powerful figures emerged like bamboo shoots after a spring rain. The world is always in a state of rise and fall. Some people are high, and some people are low."
The once-leading sect began its decline. Since then, Master has hardly rested. He spends most of his time standing before the jade tablets of his ancestors, sometimes for an entire day.
He sighed deeply, and the steam from his cup was swept away by the night wind.
"The rise and fall of a sect, and the prosperity of the entire main road, cannot be controlled by one person alone. Seeing him in such pain, and seeing my fellow disciples so unwilling, I feel a little itchy in my heart."
That was the first time I tasted pain; though fleeting, it was there nonetheless.
At this point, he had already sat down next to Lin Feiran.
"I started working with them to figure out how to support Daohe Palace. We selected many disciples to teach, but it was no use. Gradually, some disciples began to leave Daohe Palace."
As I watched them walk away, I felt a pang of regret.
"Later, my master suddenly told me that he had a solution. If he could have stopped Changzai and Qiutong back then, there would still be a chance for things to turn around."
In his first life, he was reborn, but even with my help, he still couldn't stop the two of them. After discovering this, he took me to a secret sect, saying he wanted to take me back to the past.
Bi Sheng was initially unwilling, but after learning that I belonged to the Spirit Bamboo Clan, she quickly agreed.
He paused here, as if to rest, his breathing becoming somewhat long and even. After a moment, he prepared to continue.
"The reason she was willing to let me join..."
"Senior brother," Lin Feiran interrupted him, "you don't have to tell me your secrets with the esoteric sect."
Ji Changying looked at her and smiled slightly: "...Feiran, my secret with them is very important. Isn't this what you wanted to ask me?"
"No," Lin Feiran answered firmly. "I came to see you because I was afraid that you had also been summoned back by Bi Sheng."
She looked down and saw a pair of slender hands hidden under her wide sleeves, with only a few knuckles showing: "Your breathing was off just now. Zhang Chunhe had the same breathing pattern before he broke the curse."
You don't need to break the curse because of me.
"..." Ji Changying looked at her, her smile gone for the first time, revealing her true feelings. "If you don't ask, you'll regret it."
Lin Feiran repeated her answer: "I won't."
This time, she changed the subject: "I've only known 'Ji Changying' for a short time. And what about your first life after your rebirth?"
Ji Changying remained silent for a long time before letting out a soft sigh: "I can't argue with you. I wanted to say all this and leave gracefully, but you've blocked my way."
"In my first life, I did not help Changzai and the other two again, but devoted myself to revitalizing Daohe Palace. This time they still managed to escape and return to Qingqiu. With the fox clan protecting them, even my master could not do anything about it."
Having lived through several lifetimes and been reborn several times, he may have gone a little mad, suspecting that I secretly helped him.
In our third life, he made a demon-serving vow to me, and I became his demon servant. Without his approval, I could no longer help Qiu Tong, but they still ended up together.
"In this lifetime, something grew in my empty chest, the size of a grape. Although it was thin, it was indeed beating. I looked at it several times. It was pinkish-red and throbbed again and again."
A seed has been planted in my heart.
"Later, the plans of those important figures that Master was involved in changed. For example, when Xian ascended the throne, the method of controlling the Demon King failed. He suddenly thought that he could use my identity as a demon to send me to infiltrate the Demon Capital."
Beside the Demon Lord, there is also a clansman of the same origin as me.
This has never happened before.
At this point, a cool voice came from the rooftop behind them: "That's exactly what I wanted to ask you."
Lin Feiran and Ji Changying turned to look, and Ru Xian was standing on the edge of the roof, looking down at him with a questioning look in her eyes.
"The first person I met, Qingzhu, was lively and active, with a pure mind. But when I met him, you should have already been the senior disciple of Daohe Palace for some time."
Did you meet me in disguise, or did you change your identity to reveal the true nature of Qingzhu?
Ji Changying smiled and looked away: "Naturally, I've changed my identity. I was never Qingzhu."
Ru Xian looked down, her brows furrowing: "Where is the original green bamboo?"
Ji Changying was already quite familiar with him, so she casually said, "He's a very noisy person. Kill him."
Just as Ru Xian was about to speak, Lin Feiran waved his hand between the two of them: "Senior brother is not a man of indiscriminate killing. He must have been joking. Ru Xian was only asking about Qingzhu's whereabouts and did not suspect you of doing the killing."
The two of them glanced at her, then neither of them spoke again.
Ji Changying looked at Lin Feiran and continued, "Having received Master's order, I can only go to the Demon Realm. Qingzhu is of the same clan as me and does not guard against me."
By then, he had been traveling in the human world for a long time and was no longer the boy he once was. His heart had grown to the size of a grape. In his confusion, I persuaded him to return to the secluded place.
He left, so I met with Ru Xian in his place.
He glanced at Ru Xian, then smiled and shook his head.
"He is not someone who can be easily fooled. Because I did not know about his past with Qingzhu, I was discovered twice. Both times, I spent a lot of effort to escape. Xun Feifei and Xuanzhen intercepted me together, but fortunately, I was familiar with them, so I escaped back to the human world both times."
It wasn't until I persuaded Qingzhu to leave for the third time, and then encountered Ruxian again, that I didn't give myself away again, and truly became an undercover agent.
Upon hearing this, Ru Xian chuckled, her voice cold and indifferent: "You two really have taken advantage of your rebirth to do quite a few daring things."
It refers to Qi Chen and him. One of them always has to break into the Demon Capital every time he is reborn, asking him to treat Cheng Hua's illness. The other of him always has to infiltrate the city from the underworld.
Ji Changying's voice softened: "Actually, I'm somewhat fortunate. It's good that I came to Yaodu. Xuanzhen and the others are kind-hearted and good people. Every time I return to Yaodu, I feel a sense of relief that I can finally rest."
Here, my heart grew to the size of a wild berry.
Amidst this interplay of light and darkness, black and white, and dramatic ups and downs, his heart unexpectedly began to grow stronger in the tranquility of the demon capital.
The third time...
The third time began when he met Lin Feiran in this life.
Ji Changying glanced at Lin Feiran. He only intended to say this much. The second time was related to the Demon Capital, but the third time was related to Lin Feiran. Looking at her now, he put the words back in his heart once again.
"Later, my heart grew up and became a rare, true heart among the Spirit Bamboo Clan. It was the size of two fists, pale white and woody, and it throbbed with a thud, feeling like clay to the touch."
The true heart of the bamboo, like the legendary "breathing soil," can be divided into three parts, creating all things.
At this point, he dissected himself completely, presenting himself nakedly to Lin Feiran, and then returned to the original question.
"For the first one, I carved it into a pine cone and gave it to someone so that I could stay in touch with her at any time."
"For the second one, I used a secret method to create a person I knew very well, and helped her survive the inevitable death."
"The third one is still in my heart. After all, a person cannot live without a heart."
He stood up, bent down slightly to look at the stunned person, paused, and then placed his hand on Lin Feiran's head, a smile in his eyes.
"It's just that this familiar person is too powerful. Her fate is not something I can bear. With just a bamboo heart, I can only do this much, and go this far. But I'm already very happy to have been able to save you."
"What the Daoist Master said is both right and wrong. My heart still has some strength left. Perhaps it can grow back, or perhaps it cannot. Nobody knows."
Lin Feiran looked at him, her eyes trembling, and for a moment she didn't know what to say.
"Feiran, I know you have a lot of questions to ask, but I guess Feiran will ask me first if I'm feeling well, then if my death is imminent, then if there's a solution, and everything else will come later..."
You actually asked that, I'm so happy.
Looking at himself in her eyes, he finally felt somewhat satisfied. So he stood up, and his hand, which had been on his head, quietly fell to the side of her face, his knuckles gently caressing it.
“I have a contract with my master, which is why I also have a yin-yang symbol. Before he passed away, he told me that he would break the contract, and there would be no more Zhang Chunhe in the world. Whether I go to the demon realm or return to being the senior brother, it is up to me.”
"But who am I, and where can I go?"
"I am Ji Changying, yet I am not Ji Changying; I am Qingzhu, yet I am not. I can never return to the Hidden Land. I can no longer remember what my demon clan name is..."
He looked down at Lin Feiran, a glint in his eyes and a smile on his lips.
"Feiran, you probably don't know that during those days at Daohe Palace, it was because of you that I felt my life had changed and I had something to look forward to."
I was the first person to discover you, so I hid you away...
No one could have known that 'Lin Feiran' had changed.
Of course he knew that when they were still at Daohe Palace, Lin Feiran regarded him as a place of belonging and an anchor point, and so did he.
He paused slightly, exhaled a hoarse breath, then withdrew his hand, using the edge of the table for support as he sat back down.
He raised his hand, and specks of spiritual light appeared in his palm: "The Dao Master's secret, besides Bi Sheng, is something only I have grasped in some form within the Secret Sect. The reason Bi Sheng kept me is because the puppets made by our Spirit Bamboo Clan are the most..."
He was interrupted before he could finish speaking.
He looked down and saw that Lin Feiran had completely grasped his raised wrist. The calluses on her fingers pressed against the side of his wrist, and the force released from her emotions almost forced out his faint heartbeat.
He was startled and looked up.
Lin Feiran stood beneath the thunder, her clear eyes flickering with firelight. She pursed her lips slightly, but her fingers slowly exerted force, gently pressing his wrist back onto the table.
"Senior brother, there are some things you don't need to do, and you don't need to do them."
"Tonight, it's enough for me to know who Ji Changying is."
She took out a letter, which was his reply after she had asked Shen Qi.
Author's Note: [Heart emoji]
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