No wonder Master Du'e looked strange; Chen Qi and Zheng Lun were grilling vegetarian dishes in various shapes, some of which Master Du'e had never seen before.
Subsequently,
Master Du'e flashed and appeared in front of Chen Qi and Zheng Lun, saying, "You two are in high spirits. The things you have roasted are quite unique."
Looking at Master Du'e, a subtle glint flashed in Chen Qi and Zheng Lun's eyes.
Chen Qi then said, "Daoist Master has excellent taste. If you don't mind, you can eat with me!"
"Is this appropriate?" Master Du'e asked, feigning reluctance.
Zheng Lun chimed in, "There's nothing inappropriate about it. Meeting is fate, so please join us, Daoist!"
"I cannot refuse such kindness!" said Master Du'e with a smile.
Chen Qi, “…”
Zheng Lun, “…!”
You can't refuse such hospitality? Who's being so hospitable to you?
Are all of Lao Tzu's disciples this shameless?! Tsk!
(The original text of Investiture of the Gods does not say who Du'e Zhenren is a disciple of. He is just a wandering immortal in West Kunlun. Some people speculate that he is a disciple of Laozi, and that's how it's set up!)
After Master Du'e joined them, he pointed to one of the items and asked, "What is this called?!"
"Grilled shark!"
"shark?"
The shark was carved from an eggplant and was wearing purple shorts.
There were also sheep made of cauliflower, and so on.
"What is this...?" asked Master Du'e.
Zheng Lun replied, "This is roasted bastard!"
Master Du'e: ? ? ?
What the hell is Baka?! I've never heard of it before.
“You two are truly talented. I see that you have a destiny to become immortals. Have you ever thought about cultivating a lifespan equal to that of heaven?” said True Man Du’e.
A hint of mockery flashed in Chen Qi and Zheng Lun's eyes. Chen Qi said calmly, "What's so great about living as long as the heavens? It's not as pleasant as having delicious food."
“Exactly, cultivation is so arduous and boring!” Zheng Lun said the same thing.
Master Du'e: ⊙﹏⊙?
All you know is eating?
He should have taken Zheng Lun as his disciple long ago and then secretly taught Chen Qi supernatural powers, but an unexpected incident occurred, and his master reassured him that the overall situation would not change.
So Master Du'e went into seclusion, and then emerged at the exact time, only to find the script had turned out very differently.
(In the original story, Zheng Lun was a disciple of Master Du'e, while Chen Qi was taught by the mysterious Daoist Yun.)
(Don't ask me why I'm giving all this explanation. I've been criticized too much. It's just a lighthearted, wish-fulfillment novel. I don't have any brains... As a real man, who reads novels with their brains? That's just being attached to appearances!)
"If one's lifespan were equal to that of the heavens, wouldn't one be able to enjoy all kinds of delicacies for eternity?" Master Du'e asked at this moment.
After saying that,
Chen Qi and Zheng Lun nodded in agreement, "That makes sense!"
Zheng Lun asked, "Since you say so, does the Daoist Master possess a method to live as long as the heavens?"
"Of course!" Master Du'e said with an air of superiority. "It's not just about the method to live as long as the heavens, but also about powerful supernatural abilities and techniques. After all, the world is dangerous, and one must have the ability to protect oneself!"
As the sound faded,
Chen Qi replied, "I wonder what supernatural powers you, Master, have imparted to us?"
Master Du'e looked at Zheng Lun and said, "I can teach you the magical power of nasal smoke, which involves breathing through the two energies in your nostrils. With just a snort, it will sound like a bell and emit two beams of white light that are specifically designed to absorb people's souls."
He paused for a moment.
Master Du'e then looked at Chen Qi and said, "I can teach you to cultivate a yellow aura in your abdomen. When you open your mouth and exhale, the yellow aura will be expelled, and those who see it will have their souls scattered."
With just a hum or a shout from the two of you, you can roam the world freely; ordinary strongmen are no match for you.
“That sounds good, then you can teach me!” Zheng Lun said.
Master Du'e: ? ? ?
Is this... how you teach?
You want me to teach you supernatural powers without even a formal apprenticeship? How can you two be so shameless?!
That's impressive!
Before Master Du'e could speak, Chen Qi said, "What are you saying? Such supernatural powers cannot be taught so easily! You haven't even given me a token of appreciation?!"
Master Du'e: !
!
Look, look, that's the difference!
Chen Qi is so sensible!
Before Master Du'e could even express his feelings, Chen Qi quickly handed the roasted Baga to him, saying, "Daoist Master, eat up, eat more!"
As he spoke,
The roasted bastard was even offered to Du'e Zhenren's mouth. Unable to refuse such hospitality, Du'e Zhenren accepted it and began to eat it.
Under the strong persuasion of Chen Qi and Zheng Lun, Master Du'e ate quite a lot of roasted bastards!
"Daoist Master, have you finished eating?!" Chen Qi asked.
Master Du'e nodded, "Alright! Alright! The flavor is unique, and the ingredients are excellent. It's quite good!"
After saying that,
Chen Qi then said, "That's good, then let's begin teaching, Taoist Master!"
Master Du'e: ? ? ?
That's it?!
That's it?!
A few roasted bastards and he's already mastered two supernatural powers?! He didn't even have a master?
Oh!
!
They also said there was one sensible one, a bit... but there really weren't many!
Cough cough!
After coughing twice, Master Du'e said, "The path of cultivation places particular emphasis on lineage, the transmission of supernatural powers, and the connection to cause and effect."
Zheng Lun teased, "Does the Taoist priest want us to become his disciples?!"
Master Du'e: !
!
See, it's not that I don't understand, I have to point it out to them!
"Not bad!" Master Du'e nodded.
Upon hearing this,
Zheng Lun and Chen Qi exchanged a glance, and Chen Qi said coldly, "He wants to be our master!"
Zheng Lun grinned and said, "Heh! You dog!"
After saying that,
Chen Qi and Zheng Lun both stared at Master Du'e, which startled Master Du'e.
Before Master Du'e could react, Chen Qi and Zheng Lun struck simultaneously, delivering two resounding slaps to his face—one on the right cheek, the other on the left. Master Du'e was completely stunned.
Chen Qi's voice rang out, "You little brat! What are you barking about?!"
Zheng Lun chimed in, "You? You think you're worthy of being our master? You little brat! Get lost!"
"You've eaten so much roasted bastard, and you're still not satisfied?! What a slap in the face! How dare you say that!" Chen Qi shouted coldly.
Zheng Lun also said coldly, "Letting you eat roasted bastards is already giving you face, and you're ungrateful for it!"
Master Du'e: ? ? ?
What's going on?!
Is this how the script goes? They called me a brat?! They said I wasn't worthy of being their master?! They even said that letting me eat roasted bastards was an insult to me?!
wipe!
At this moment, Master Du'e also came to his senses, his face extremely gloomy.
"Do you know what you're doing?! If I wanted to kill you, it would be as easy as crushing ants, you..."
Before Master Du'e could finish speaking, Chen Qi and Zheng Lun attacked simultaneously once again.
With a snap,
Master Du'e was stunned again. ? ? ?
Chen Qi's voice rang out, cold and devoid of any emotion, "You little brat! Threatening me?!"
Zheng Lun's voice rang out, "What?! You're not happy?! I'll hit you, so what? If you're not happy, just keep it to yourself, don't make trouble for yourself, understand?!"
Master Du'e: ⊙﹏⊙!
How dare they?! And... why do I have a bad feeling about this?!
But how can we lose face!
"Very well, if I don't teach you a lesson today, you'll never know your place!" Master Du'e coldly shouted.
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