Chapter 30 Fragments (6) Gu Moheng, don't push your luck. ...
The red light flickered in the deep winter night, like a critical reading on a heart monitor.
Wen Chen didn't answer the question, and Gu Moheng didn't need him to. He had already caught the fleeting hint of relaxation from the subtle changes in the breathing of the person beside him.
The first lesson he learned from eight years of ups and downs in the business world was how to accurately identify every slight movement of his prey.
As the neon lights streamed in through the car window, Gu Moheng turned his head to the side at the opportune moment. He knew that this angle would allow the light and shadow to precisely define the lines of his jaw.
That was a place Wen Chen had traced countless times with his fingertips. The marks left on his face by time and power were carefully transformed into bargaining chips: the coldness in his brows melted into a softness that only the other could recognize, belonging to "that boy."
"Gu Moheng."
Wen Chen's voice was colder than the icy wind seeping through the cracks in the car window.
Gu Moheng's fingers tightened on the steering wheel. He turned his head and met Wen Chen's calm eyes.
“We have all changed a lot in these eight years.”
Wen Chen looked at him and said, "You are no longer the junior who only revolved around me, and I am no longer the Wen Chen who couldn't live without you."
Gu Moheng felt as if his heart had been squeezed tightly, a sharp pain instantly spreading to every part of his body. He would rather Wen Chen scold him, or even slap him, than hear her so nonchalantly drawing a line between them.
“Nothing has changed,” Gu Moheng retorted almost stubbornly.
He leaned forward, his deep eyes surging with a desperate undercurrent, locking onto Wen Chen's gaze as he said, word by word, "I am still the Gu Moheng who revolves around you, and my feelings for you have never changed."
"emotion?"
Wen Chen smiled mockingly, as if she had heard a joke. "Don't you think it's too much of a luxury to talk to me about feelings now?"
His gaze slowly moved downwards, landing on Gu Moheng's right hand, which was wrapped in gauze, and a trace of blood was faintly seeping out. A fleeting hint of pity flashed in Wen Chen's eyes, but it vanished in an instant, covered by an even harder, colder expression.
"When you made that decision eight years ago, you weighed the pros and cons and acted decisively. Why didn't you think about feelings back then?"
Gu Moheng's face turned deathly pale instantly.
This is his Achilles' heel. It's a stain that he can never erase, no matter how much he tries to make amends for the rest of his life.
"Given the Gu family's situation back then, if I didn't let go, I would only drag you into the mire..."
"That's what you think!"
Wen Chen suddenly became agitated, her voice rising and breaking the facade of decorum she had maintained.
“Gu Moheng, you’re always like this, arranging everything in your own self-righteous way, and thinking you’re doing it ‘for my own good’.”
"You're asking me if I'm using the wrong method?"
Wen Chen took a deep breath, her chest heaving violently, and a faint redness rose to the corners of her eyes.
"Your mistake was being too arrogant."
"What makes you think that I, Wen Chen, am the kind of person who can only share the good times but not the bad?"
These words were like a resounding slap across Gu Moheng's face. He opened his mouth, but his throat felt like it was stuffed with a wad of water-soaked cotton, and he couldn't utter a sound.
"drop--"
A loud honking sounded from behind, and then the green light came on.
Gu Moheng mechanically released the brake and stepped on the accelerator, and the car rejoined the rolling traffic.
The carriage fell silent again, even more suffocating than before.
The outburst of emotion just now seemed to have exhausted all of Wen Chen's strength. He closed his eyes wearily, rested his head against the car window, and refused to look at Gu Moheng again.
Gu Moheng greedily gazed at his profile out of the corner of his eye. He saw his trembling eyelashes, his tightly pursed lips. That feeling of powerlessness—wanting to touch him yet not daring to reach out—was driving him crazy.
He won the bet, he won the business war, he won on Wall Street.
But he lost the person beside him.
Twenty minutes later.
The Maybach slowly drove into the underground parking garage of the upscale apartment building.
Gu Moheng turned off the engine, and the surrounding light dimmed, with only the dashboard emitting a faint blue glow.
Wen Chen paused for a moment as he unbuckled his seatbelt.
A soft "click" sound.
Wen Chen turned her head, her brows furrowed, and looked at the man beside her who seemed to be swallowed by darkness.
"Not getting off the bus?"
Gu Moheng didn't respond, not even a tremor of his eyelashes. His deep eyes were staring blankly at the gray wall in front of him. The argument in the car, the accusations of "arrogance" and "self-righteousness," were like dull knives, still sawing at the air.
Wen Chen pursed his lips in frustration. He placed his hand on the doorknob, wanting to push the door open and escape this suffocating space. But for some reason, looking at Gu Moheng's dejected appearance, he couldn't muster any strength to push the door open.
As if possessed, he sat back down.
Some questions, after lingering on my tongue, were finally asked: "The thing my mom asked about at the dinner table just now."
Wen Chen's voice rang out in the darkness.
Gu Moheng finally reacted. He slowly turned his head, his gaze landing sluggishly on Wen Chen's face. "What's wrong?"
Wen Chen avoided his overly heavy gaze and instead looked into the void.
You said "fallen leaves return to their roots".
Wen Chen paused, thinking of Aunt Gu who always treated him with a gentle smile, "After Uncle Gu passed away, Aunt Gu... she must have had a hard time living alone abroad, right?"
The person is gone, and those who remain are the ones who suffer the most.
"Are you planning to bring your aunt back to China to retire?" Wen Chen asked softly, trying to make her tone sound like a casual greeting between ordinary friends.
Gu Moheng's Adam's apple bobbed violently.
"Hmm..." he responded heavily.
Then came a long, suffocating silence. So long that Wen Chen thought he wouldn't answer anymore.
Gu Moheng suddenly lowered his head. Strands of hair fell across his forehead, obscuring the heavy shadow beneath his brow bone. He loosened his grip on the steering wheel, his palms covered in sticky, cold sweat.
"No need for retirement."
Wen Chen was startled and subconsciously turned to look at him. In the dim light of the garage's motion-sensor lights, he saw a very faint and bitter smile tugging at the corners of Gu Moheng's lips.
"The night my father passed away."
Gu Moheng raised his head, his eyes bloodshot but dry, unable to shed a single tear.
"My mother sent everyone away and stayed by my father's side alone. That night, she passed away with him."
Wen Chen stared in disbelief, his pupils contracting sharply. His hands, resting on his knees, clenched tightly around the fabric. He opened his mouth, but found his throat too dry to utter a sound.
He looked at Gu Moheng. This man was sitting right next to him at this moment, so close, yet it felt as if he were standing alone on the edge of an abyss.
So this is what "fallen leaves return to their roots" means.
Wen Chen's brows furrowed deeply. "When did this happen?" Her question was no longer a cold, accusatory one.
Gu Moheng closed his eyes, concealing the overwhelming pain surging within them. He leaned back against the pillow, as if all his strength had been drained away. "Less than half a year ago."
Wen Chen's breath hitched.
In other words, after handling his parents' funeral arrangements, Gu Moheng didn't even give himself a moment to breathe or heal. He rushed back to China without stopping, carrying his injuries and the weight of his recent loss.
Gu Moheng opened his eyes in the darkness. He turned his head, his unfathomable eyes fixed on Wen Chen. It was a kind of almost obsessive, desperate despair, like a dying person grasping at their last piece of driftwood.
"Wen Chen".
"Now, you're all I have."
Gu Moheng stared dejectedly at Wen Chen's face, trying to discern even the slightest hint of emotion. He was gambling. Gambling that deep within Wen Chen's heart, encased in layers of ice, perhaps a trace of tenderness remained, reserved for him.
Wen Chen's fingers, resting on her knees, trembled slightly.
They wavered.
Gu Moheng greedily caught this subtle change out of the corner of his eye. The desperate madness in his heart, mixed with real grief, made him want to rush over and hug this person tightly, regardless of everything.
But he held back.
Wen Chen is now like a frightened bird; any sudden movement will make him completely lose his temper and run away.
He must be patient.
My condolences.
After a long while, Wen Chen's hoarse voice rang out in the darkness.
There was no comfort, no hug, only these two cold words.
Gu Moheng gave a bitter smile, his eyes dark and expressionless. "Hmm," he responded softly, slowly and clumsily trying to unbuckle his seatbelt with his injured right hand, revealing his discomfort.
"Let's go up."
Gu Moheng pushed open the car door, and a blast of cold air hit him.
Wen Chen sat in the passenger seat, his brows furrowed, as if he were engaged in some kind of intense internal struggle.
Gu Moheng didn't urge him. He stood outside the car door, supporting himself on the roof with his left hand. Even his broad shoulders and narrow waist made him look particularly desolate in the dim light.
He was waiting for Wen Chen's verdict.
If it were Wen Chen eight years ago, she would have tenderly embraced him and used all her warmth to dispel his chill.
But now...
Wen Chen composed herself and got out of the car. She hardened her heart, turned, and walked resolutely towards the elevator. Gu Moheng watched her retreating figure, his heart feeling as if it were being torn apart by a dull knife. He gazed at her retreating back and forced a smile.
It doesn't matter.
Since you're not coming over, I'll go to you.
Gu Moheng lowered his eyes, locked the car, and strode after him. Just as the elevator doors were about to close, a slender hand blocked them. The automatic doors reopened, Gu Moheng leaned in, and the elevator doors closed again. The scent of cedarwood inside the car instantly exploded in that small area, forcefully enveloping Wen Chen.
Wen Chen subconsciously took a step back into the corner, creating some distance.
Gu Moheng leaned wearily against the wall of the elevator car and pressed the button for the top floor, which was their current "home".
Or rather, it was a territory that Gu Moheng forcibly brought Wen Chen into through various means.
The elevator numbers slowly rose.
Soon, a "ding" sounded.
The elevator doors slid open slowly on the top floor.
The fingerprint lock on the front door made a soft "beep" sound.
The living room of the large apartment was pitch black, with only the afterglow of the city light streaming in through the floor-to-ceiling windows barely outlining the cold, hard contours of the furniture.
Gu Moheng didn't turn on the light. He stood in the entryway, without changing his shoes, leaning against the wall to hide himself in the shadows.
Wen Chen followed him in and casually turned on the entryway light. The sudden brightness made Gu Moheng instinctively squint and raise his hand to shield his eyes. That moment of vulnerability was completely seen by Wen Chen.
"Change your shoes."
Wen Chen's voice was indifferent, but she kicked the men's slippers next to her feet toward Gu Moheng's feet.
Gu Moheng lowered his eyes to look at the slippers, the bitter smile on his lips softening slightly. You see, that's just how people are. They say they hate, they say they're cutting ties, but their actions betray them; deep down, they're still that kind person.
"My hands hurt, and I can't bend over."
Gu Moheng raised his right hand, which was wrapped in gauze, and spoke with a self-righteous tone, tinged with a hint of coquetry.
Wen Chen paused in unbuttoning her coat, glanced disdainfully at the man beside her who looked to be several years old through her gold-rimmed glasses, and said, "Gu Moheng, you injured your hand, not your back."
Gu Moheng did not move.
Wen Chen snorted lightly, her eyes full of mockery, "Why don't you call your doctor and ask if your hand injury could lead to paralysis?"
Gu Moheng didn't feel embarrassed at being exposed. He stared at Wen Chen, his eyes moist, just like the junior student Wen Chen had caught peeping at him in the library eight years ago.
"I'm out of energy," he said softly, perfectly conveying his "weakness."
Wen Chen remained silent, a slight bruise throbbing on his forehead. "Go to sleep early." He turned to leave.
"Wen Chen." The rustling sound of fabric rubbing came from behind.
Wen Chen paused, but didn't turn around. "What is it now?"
"Overcoat".
Gu Moheng's voice carried a hint of helplessness and a touch of coaxing, "The buttons are too tight; I can't unbutton them with one hand."
Wen Chen closed his eyes, turned around, and stared through gritted teeth at the man standing under the entryway light who had already changed into slippers.
Gu Moheng's arms were slightly outstretched, a posture strikingly similar to that of a young man waiting for his lover's embrace eight years ago. If one ignored the gleam in his eyes, like a wild beast eyeing its prey.
"Gu Moheng, I am not your caregiver."
"I know."
Gu Moheng's lips curled into a very faint smile. "No caregiver is as considerate as you."
Wen Chen got goosebumps from that word "thoughtful." He strode back and roughly grabbed the collar of Gu Moheng's coat.
"Just untie it, right?"
His fingers deftly unbuttoned each button. The pure black cashmere coat carried the biting chill of the outside air, mixed with the unique scent of cedar emanating from Gu Moheng.
This scent had enveloped Wen Chen in countless nights as she fell asleep; her body's memory awakened faster than her reason. Wen Chen's fingers trembled uncontrollably.
As the last button was undone, he was about to remove his hand.
Gu Moheng suddenly took half a step forward.
The distance between them instantly shrank to zero. The masculine heat of his body, penetrating through the thin shirt, aggressively assaulted him.
Wen Chen's breath hitched, and she instinctively stepped back, but her waist bumped against the cabinet in the entryway.
There was no way to retreat.
"you……"
"tie."
Gu Moheng lowered his head, his nose almost touching Wen Chen's forehead, his voice hoarse, "It's so tight, I can't breathe."
Wen Chen looked at him and knew he was lying, but the bloodshot eyes were real. The weariness and deathly stillness emanating from his very bones were also real.
Looking at this man who had lost both parents and was all alone in this world, the hard wall in my heart, thanks to everything that had happened tonight, finally cracked open.
Wen Chen pursed her lips, raised her hand, and grasped the dark blue striped tie. Her slender fingers hooked the knot and pulled it down.
"It's loosened."
Wen Chen avoided Gu Moheng's burning gaze, staring at his bobbing Adam's apple, and said, "You can go to sleep now."
Gu Moheng suddenly lowered his head and rested his forehead on Wen Chen's shoulder. All the weight pressed down on him at that moment, like a collapsing mountain.
Wen Chen's body stiffened, her hands hovering in mid-air, unsure whether to push or hug.
"Gu Moheng, don't push your luck." Wen Chen's tone was stern but his words betrayed his underlying weakness.
"One minute."
Gu Moheng's voice came out in a muffled tone, "Just one minute."
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