Chapter 81 She's been dead for so long, and His Majesty still hasn't...
“If you leave the Jiangyuan Marquis’s residence on New Year’s Eve, many people will definitely be looking for you,” Yunxi explained.
Fan Zishi remained silent, standing in front of the rosewood cabinet, seemingly busy tidying his clothes.
Staring at his tense profile, Yunxi smiled and said, "Lord Fan, although I can wait for you to come, it seems you're not good at making dumplings."
Upon hearing her words, Fan Zishi's expression finally softened. "Even if you don't know how, you can learn."
"Alright then, I'll wait for you to come." Yunxi stretched and said casually, "Lord Lu has no relatives in the capital, and he'll be spending New Year's Eve alone anyway, so why not come and join us for some fun?"
This was clearly an explanation to him.
That's just how Yunxi is; if she considers you one of her own, she always softens.
Our own people.
Fan Zishi's eyes trembled, and he suddenly turned around to look at Yun Xi.
As his throat tightened, many words welled up inside him, making him want to ask her directly and get a definite answer.
The lamplight flickered, and Yunxi noticed his expression was off. She asked worriedly, "What's wrong? Has the weather been too cold lately and you caught a cold?"
Seeing her concerned expression, the heavy weight that had been pressing on Fan Zishi's heart was finally lifted.
People tend to become exceptionally greedy when they have more.
He only wanted her to stop distancing herself from him; he didn't even dare to ask for forgiveness.
Even though she hasn't said it explicitly, she's willing to stay by his side, even if it's only for a little over a year. He knows better than anyone that, given her resolute nature, if he doesn't give her a chance, she will leave without hesitation, no matter how difficult it may be.
That's enough.
His heart fluttered, and he couldn't help but step forward, raise his hand, and rub her head.
She looked up from his palm, and Fan Zishi smiled. "Then, how about you teach me how to make dumplings?"
“Okay.” Yun Xi ruffled her messy hair and raised her eyebrows, saying, “Then you have to call me Master Yun.”
"Master Yun." Fan Zishi looked down at her and indeed called out.
Looking at each other, they couldn't help but smile.
Yunxi knew that she had become a knot in Fan Zishi's heart. If she forced herself to leave again this time, Fan Zishi would be guilty for the rest of his life.
In fact, she and he were not related by blood, yet he went to such lengths for her, risking execution, the destruction of his family and clan.
She couldn't bear to let him fall into guilt and self-blame because of her.
She was destined to leave the capital, and perhaps they would never see each other again in this lifetime. If her delay in leaving could resolve his inner conflict, she thought she was willing.
The heavy snow continued on Lunar New Year's Eve.
Lu Xiuran came through the secret passage in the evening carrying a pot of chicken soup. When he saw Yunxi chopping meat in the kitchen, he quickly strode over and asked, "Where's the maid? Why are you all alone?"
“It’s the Lunar New Year, so I let them rest,” Yunxi said.
After all, being under the emperor's nose, in order to avoid any unforeseen complications, the courtyard usually only had Yunxi and two maids.
They were all deaf and mute.
"Let me do it," Lu Xiuran said after washing his hands, rolling up his sleeves and taking over what Yunxi was doing.
Seeing that the hands that once held a pen were now confined to the stove, Yunxi joked, "Lord Lu, I never imagined that you were not only skilled in literature and could bring peace to the country, but also so adept at cooking."
Lu Xiuran smiled and said, "I used to cook a lot when I was a child."
"Where are your parents?" Yunxi asked casually.
"Killed by the Turks." Lu Xiuran's hands didn't stop chopping vegetables for a moment.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know." Yunxi immediately felt a little embarrassed.
“This is not your fault, why apologize?” He stopped what he was doing and looked at Yunxi seriously, saying, “Actually, I said it on purpose.”
"Huh?" Yunxi was caught off guard by these honest words and didn't know how to react for a moment.
This time, Lu Xiuran put down the meat-chopping knife.
He slowly raised his eyes, pursed his lips, and looked at Yunxi as he slowly said, "Although I shouldn't say such things on such an auspicious day, I still want to say it."
The door was then pushed open.
Fan Zishi stood by the door carrying a basket of frozen pears and asked, "What are you doing?"
He stood against the light at the doorway, the collar of his cloak trimmed with fox fur, which made him appear even more gentle and refined.
But his expression seemed to be shrouded in gloom.
"It's nothing, Lord Lu was just about to talk about his childhood," Yunxi said frankly. "Lord Fan, come quickly, we'll be making dumplings after we finish chopping the meat filling."
Fan Zishi silently held his breath, moved his lips, and said in a gentle tone, "Okay."
He was also very tall, and once he entered, the kitchen became even more crowded, but none of the three of them complained.
When making dumplings, Yunxi stood in the middle, with Fan Zishi and Lu Xiuran standing on either side of her.
As someone born with a silver spoon in his mouth, Fan Zishi had never been to the kitchen before. This was probably the first time he had ever been to a bridal sedan chair.
So for a moment, it was a chaotic mess, and flour got all over his temples and nose.
"Hahaha, Lord Fan!" His disheveled appearance immediately drew merciless ridicule from Yunxi.
Lu Xiuran, standing to the side, couldn't help but purse his lips, trying hard to suppress his laughter.
Fan Zishi couldn't help but laugh, and then he deliberately said, "Master Yun, it seems you need to learn how to teach people properly."
"Tsk tsk, a high-ranking official of the third rank, now he's learned to play the fool, turning the tables on his enemies."
Behind the three, chicken soup was bubbling and steaming.
The aroma of chicken soup filled the narrow kitchen.
The table was covered with flour, and rows of round dumplings were placed on top of it.
Lu Xiuran lowered his head and rolled out dumpling wrappers. Yun Xi picked up one, looked up at Fan Zishi beside him and said, "Disciple, watch carefully. I'll only teach you this once."
Fan Zishi nodded and clumsily picked up a dumpling wrapper to try and imitate the pattern.
Outside the window, the snow was falling heavily and the wind was biting cold.
In the cramped room, the candlelight flickered on Yunxi's nose, casting a warm glow on even her eyelashes.
As long as I stand by her side, I am not afraid of any rain, snow, wind, or frost.
This winter, it seemed as if the cold of the entire world had poured into the Forbidden City.
The sound of the clapper echoed through the alleyways, and the vermilion lacquer on the thirty-six palace gates was fading to the dark red of coffins in the snow. The dense snow covered the entire imperial city, turning it into a huge snow mound.
Vast and silent, devoid of any human presence.
When "Your Majesty" Fu Shun pushed open the door to the Qianqing Palace, Xiao Shenjing was already dressed neatly.
"Is everything ready?" he asked, turning his head. Tonight, he was wearing a silver fox fur cloak, with a moon-white Taoist robe faintly visible beneath. The winding gold thread along the collar shone brightly in the candlelight, and the exquisite jade belt accentuated his lean and strong silhouette.
The candlelight shone on the emperor's profile, revealing that his face was even paler than the fur collar of his fox fur coat.
“Everything has been packed up,” Fu Shun nodded, glanced outside, and said worriedly, “Your Majesty, the wind and snow are very heavy today, and the roads are slippery.”
Xiao Shenjing seemed not to hear him and walked straight past him.
Soon, with her clothes fluttering, her tall figure disappeared under the eaves amidst the swirling snow.
Fu Shun stood under the eaves and let out a long sigh.
When they reached the outside of the hall, a young Taoist priest bowed and asked in a low voice, "Chief Steward Fu, Your Majesty, are you going to take the elixir of immortality today?"
Fu Shun shook his head and said, "No need. Let Immortal Jing Zhi carefully study the elixir. If His Majesty's health is harmed, then no one can save your lives."
"Yes, yes, I will go and report to the immortal master right away." The young Taoist priest quickly withdrew.
Fu Shun gazed in the direction of the imperial tomb and couldn't help but sigh again.
When Consort Yun's remains were still kept in Yongle Palace, His Majesty, even if he went to bed late, would still go to bed early on some occasions.
Since the burial of Consort Yun, His Majesty has been unable to sleep at night. The useless people in the Imperial Hospital can't even cure a minor case of insomnia, and they have to make His Majesty take those harmful pills.
Is that something that can be taken long-term? But what can we do when His Majesty can't sleep every night?
Although Fu Shun didn't want to admit it, he knew that all of this was related to Consort Yun.
As the saying goes, physical injuries are easy to heal, but mental illnesses are hard to cure.
Consort Yun has become a source of great anxiety for His Majesty.
She has been gone for so long, yet His Majesty has still not recovered.
When Consort Yun was alive, Fu Shun disliked her loud and abusive language towards His Majesty.
But now he would rather Consort Yun come back to life and beat and scold His Majesty than live like this.
As the horse trampled the snow piled up at the palace gate, Xiao Shenjing raised his hand to adjust his hood. His silver fox fur cloak fluttered in the north wind, and the jade dragon buckle on his belt rested against the saddle, reflecting a cold light in the snow with each rise and fall of his body.
Snowflakes landed on his dark blue eyelashes, and the taut lines of his jaw were made even more sharp by the silver fox fur, while an unyielding frost settled between his brows.
The heavy stone gate of the imperial mausoleum slowly opened.
The dragon-patterned lantern illuminated the white marble steps, where Xiao Shenjing laid his cloak on the gold bricks beside the coffin. His hood had long been removed, and now he wore only a white jade hairpin in his hair. He was dressed in a moon-white Taoist robe woven with gold, looking exactly as Yunxi liked him from head to toe.
The Big Dipper constellation on the dome of the underground palace gleamed with a cold light, and the emperor sat kneeling on the gold bricks beside the black lacquered coffin.
“Yunxi,” he said, picking up the gilded nine-peach box. “I brought you my favorite cherry cheese.”
He smiled at the phoenix and peony pattern on the side of the coffin. "And there's your favorite Golden Milk Pastry, but the new chef in the Imperial Kitchen added camel milk this time. I don't know if you'll like it."
As soon as the lid was opened, a faint steam rose from inside. The golden milk pastry, coated with osmanthus honey, was placed next to the jade pillow, and the sugar residue condensed into ice crystals in the cold air.
No one responded.
Even with the ever-burning lamps shining brightly, they could not penetrate the eerie darkness of the underground palace.
Xiao Shenjing, however, seemed completely unconcerned and said, "I haven't eaten tonight either, let's eat together."
As he spoke, he slowly ladled out a spoonful of cherry cream.
The sweet and sour taste slowly melts in your mouth.
“You always like to tease me, saying that even the most delicious food can only be eaten in one bite.” He curled his lips into a smile. “Today is New Year’s Eve, so there aren’t so many rules. I’m going to eat all of your favorite cherry yogurt.”
He paused for a moment.
"Anyway, you can't curse me or hit me."
Xiao Shenjing held the spoon and slowly closed his eyes.
"Yunxi, I know you're dead, you've been dead for half a year. Why do I still not forget you? Even on New Year's Eve, a day that should be for family reunion, I've thought about it for a long time, and it seems that I have no real family." He chuckled.
I, the King.
A truly lonely person.
"So, you'll stay up with me tonight to celebrate the New Year. Anyway, you can't refuse now, no matter how unwilling you are."
He forked a small piece of golden milk pastry and put it in his mouth.
Sitting beside the coffin, he had a better appetite than usual. Even though he knew Yunxi was dead, he still had the illusion that she was still there.
It was like returning to the morning after court, where she used the pretense of testing poison for him, but instead left behind dishes he didn't like with great enthusiasm.
Her almond-shaped eyes were bathed in the morning light, and her chubby cheeks seemed to be full of life.
He looked at her and smiled again, speaking as if it were a casual conversation: "Yunxi, once the borders are more stable and the country is stronger, I will allow the concubines in the harem to leave the palace and marry their own spouses."
"Once a suitable successor is chosen, I want to see what the country I've protected for most of my life looks like. I need to take you with me. The coffin is too heavy; perhaps I should use a jade casket instead?"
He took another bite of the golden milk pastry.
“Master Jingzhi’s elixirs are becoming less and less effective, and I see you less and less in the evenings. I need to have him find some new elixir formulas.” As he said this, he suddenly remembered something, and his phoenix eyes lit up. “That’s right, Yunxi, I had someone find another peach-colored pearl.” He took out a mother-of-pearl inlaid lacquer box from his pocket, opened it, and there were two large peach-pink pearls.
"Do you like them? I'll have them embroidered on the tips of your shoes when I get back," Xiao Shenjing suddenly chuckled, the smile playing on his lips. "I think if you were still here, you would definitely pluck these two pearls and use them to pay for wine."
He talked about a lot of random things.
When he got tired of talking, he leaned against the coffin and closed his eyes.
As dawn broke, Dao Yi, carrying a lantern, called out, "Your Majesty, it's time to leave."
Xiao Shenjing slowly opened his eyes and realized that he hadn't used any pills that night; he had actually managed to fall asleep even with incense.
It's just time for him to leave.
Dao came in, packed his things, and helped Xiao Shenjing to his feet.
Because he had been leaning against the coffin all night, his body was stiff, making him stagger and look rather awkward when he got up.
He paused for a moment, his frozen fingers slowly tracing the phoenix and peony pattern on the coffin before turning and walking out of the underground palace.
Even as the sound of the underground palace's machinery echoed in the silence and the heavy stone doors slowly closed, he couldn't help but turn back to look at the dark lacquered coffin.
On the fifteenth day of the first lunar month, Yunxi's child was born.
She practiced martial arts from a young age and hardly suffered any pain during childbirth.
Although Fan Zishi and Lu Xiuran couldn't easily walk on the road that day, they walked back and forth in the next room and almost broke the floor tiles.
The two of them kept their heads down and kept bumping into each other.
Finally, they grew tired of each other and simply stood opposite each other, one in the north and the other in the south, moving back and forth without disturbing each other.
When the maid brought the child over, Lu Xiuran was the first to run, but he eventually realized what was happening and made way for Fan Zishi behind him.
The newborn baby was wrinkled so badly that Fan Zishi frowned frequently.
How can it look so ugly?
Oh well, if it looks bad, it looks bad.
If it's a girl, it's not a big deal to keep her at home.
She was greatly disappointed when she learned it was a son.
Lu Xiuran, who leaned closer, said, "Your eyebrows and eyes look a lot like Yun Xi's."
How did you figure that out?
Fan Zishi wanted to ask him, but in the end he held back.
After Lu Xiuran left, Fan Zishi went into Yunxi's room.
Yunxi was so exhausted that she fell asleep.
Her face was somewhat pale, and she had already changed into clean robes.
Fan Zishi sat down by the bed, couldn't help but take out a handkerchief, bend down, and carefully wipe her sweaty temples.
His gaze, however, couldn't help but drift downwards, towards the wet, thick eyelashes and the crimson corners of the eyes.
When Fan Zishi realized what was happening, he found that his lips were only inches away from Yunxi's lips.
My heart was pounding.
The young Lord Fan got up in a fluster and strode away.
Yunxi was able to get out of bed and walk on the third day, but Fan Zishi pressed her back onto the bed with a stern face, saying, "The doctor said that she needs to take good care of herself after giving birth."
"Yunxi, have you decided what name to give him?"
"Dog Egg." Yunxi swallowed a candy egg.
Fan Zishi looked at her with a reproachful expression.
Even Lu Xiuran looked disapproving.
"Let's call her Yuanxiao for now," Yunxi decided.
"At least it's festive." Fan Zishi finally relented.
That night, Fan Zishi soothed the child.
When I arrived, I found Yunxi leaning against the window, gazing at the stars in the night sky.
"The spring chill is still quite high; you can't be exposed to the wind yet." He went over and closed the window.
“You are very good to Yuanxiao.” He had just turned around when he heard Yunxi ask slowly, “Because he is Xiao Shenjing’s child, he is the emperor and you are the subject, so you love him so much?”
Fan Zishi has seen things clearly these days.
Yunxi refused to approach the child.
She still harbored resentment.
“Yunxi, I like Yuanxiao only because he is your child,” Fan Zishi said solemnly, shaking his head.
"My child?" She looked up from between his hands, her almond-shaped eyes glazed over.
Fan Zishi held her shoulders and nodded. "Yes, he is the child you carried for ten months and gave birth to. What does he have to do with anyone else? He is your blood relative. You are no longer alone, Yunxi."
Even now, Fan Zishi still feels heartbroken when he recalls what Hongxiu said back then.
If a person has no ties and no desires, he is like a candle flame in the wind, which can be extinguished at any moment.
Yunxi has always been carefree, but the abandonment by her biological parents and the repeated abandonment have left scars in her heart.
That wound needs to be healed.
Hearing Fan Zishi's words, Yun Xi slowly blinked.
She was incredibly well-behaved at that moment.
Fan Zishi couldn't help but raise his hand again and rub her head, smiling as he assured her, "It's okay if you can't accept it now, take it slow, Yunxi, I'll be there for you."
If he could, he would like to stay with you like this forever.
But he also knew very clearly that Yunxi was going to leave him again.
The only reason she chose to stay this time was out of pity for him.
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