Because it is a diary and no one else can see it, I once again said from the bottom of my heart: I like Lin An.
But Ye Ju and Xu Yaoji are also my recognized friends. I know that they both have feelings for Lin An, but I thought in my heart that everyone wanted to maintain the current six-person relationship. As long as I bury the pain in my heart, it will be the best choice for everyone. As a result, I was the only one who was so naive to think that everyone was already tired of the seemingly harmonious relationship between the two.
Lin An has a sadness in his heart that I don't know about. Do I really like Lin An? Or is it like what I said to Xiao Yaoyao, that I only like the Lin An in my imagination?
No, I like Lin An as a person. No matter how Lin An becomes, I like him.
It seems that I can't escape this competition.
I think, since I like Lin An so much, Lin An will definitely choose me in the end.
December Xth.
In order to become the best club, our Love Research Club will take on love-related commissions throughout the school. Ye Ju and I will take turns leading these commissions, and we will have the opportunity to spend time with Lin An alone.
We have this opportunity to find out Lin An’s true inner thoughts and understand why he is sad.
Lin An and I have already led two commissions, but apart from discovering that I like Lin An more and more, I have not found the reason for Lin An's sadness.
So I started to reflect, and I found that it might be because I was jealous of the relationship between Lin An and Ye Ju and the others. Lin An appeared to be a timid person who didn't want to get into trouble, but in fact he was a kind boy who cherished friendship and didn't want people around him to get hurt. He was always sad because of me.
I want to be more generous, but my lover is flirting with other girls. If I don’t feel jealous and upset, then it doesn’t mean I really love him, and I still can’t be generous.
But because of Lin An's sadness for me, I compromised and decided to try my best to maintain the good times for the six of us.
I thought, since I like Lin An so much, what I want is to be with Lin An forever. It must be me who accompanies him until the end and marries him. It doesn't matter if I leave some unforgettable memories for Ye Ju and the others.
I started a band, went to a small island in the south to practice, vowed to get together again in ten years, and tried my best to create a happy atmosphere for the six of us to be together. Because it was for Lin An, I could do anything.
But……
I saw Xu Yaoji kissing Lin An in public. My heart ached, as if it was being torn apart alive. I was in so much pain that I couldn't breathe.
I can't deceive myself anymore. I want to have Lin An all to myself. I don't want to see Lin An flirting with other girls.
True love can't be shared.
I told Lin An the truth: I want the six of us to be together, and I want you even more, even if it means sacrificing the relationship between the six of us. If this is considered a heavy burden, then I will be the heavy Jian Shuier.
December Xth.
I did something wrong, I'm sorry to Lin An.
I still can't be the heavy Jian Shuier. I am the source of Lin An's pain, and I should stay away from Lin An.
But when Lin An announced his marriage, and the bride wasn't me, my world collapsed. I felt like a drowning person, and I just wanted to stay by Lin An's side regardless of anything else.
Looking back, I really did make a mistake.
No boy likes a heavy girlfriend. A heavy girlfriend will only bring burden and pain to a boy. I am the source of Lin An's sadness, and I should leave Lin An.
But I am already Lin An's girl, I just can't leave Lin An, I like Lin An so much, I can't leave Lin An's side.
For Lin An, I should leave Lin An. I like Lin An so much, but I can't leave Lin An.
My heart feels like it's being torn apart and I don't know what to do?
But one thing is, I have to keep some distance from Lin An. I can't let Lin An suffer anymore.
The next day, I didn’t know how to face Lin An.
But if Lin An marries the girl he chooses, I will lose the reason to stay with Lin An, which is something I cannot accept even more.
I still want to go to Lin An's side, even if I become the heavy Jian Shuier again.
When I arrived at the office, the first time I saw Lin An, who made me love and suffer, I couldn't help but have a flash of sadness in my eyes.
"elder sister?"
But then I thought, why is my sister in our office? Lin An said that he would introduce me to his marriage partner in Lianyan. Could it be that...
A bad thought flashed through my mind: the girl Lin An chose to marry might be my sister.
If that were the case, I would probably faint.
I can't accept that the person who took away the boy I loved was my sister.
I...I...I'm going to want to die.
…
…
He committed suicide before his sister and Lin An's wedding.
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