Chapter 1515
"She always beats the kids. She always beats the kids. She beats her. Which girl in the village is more obedient than our Ningning? I have never seen a child more obedient than Ningning. How could she bear to beat her all the time? Ningning was not raised by her.
After Ningning was born, Jiang's father was busy running the chicken farm, and Jiang's mother also went to help him. The two were very busy. After Jiang Ning was born, except for the confinement period, Jiang's mother could be said to have never taken care of her for a single day. The old man carried her wherever he went, and even took her with him to work in the fields. He raised her with rice soup mouthful by mouthful. When she grew up a little, he carried her wherever he went, and even let little Jiang Ning ride on his shoulders when he was hoeing the fields.
Children in rural areas are all raised like this, including Jiang Song and Jiang Bai. However, the first two drank her milk for at least a year, while Jiang Ning was weaned after less than two months.
Father Jiang sighed: "You know her temper."
He owed so much debt, and even though she worked so hard with him to make money to pay off the debt, how could she not feel a little resentful? In fact, the physical fatigue and huge debts made her feel very resentful and stressed, but her instinct to seek profit and avoid harm made her vent all her anger and resentment on the weak and young Jiang Ning.
When Jiang's father returned home, he ate something in a hurry, then hurried up the mountain with a flashlight.
There are fewer tigers and leopards in recent years, but there are still many jackals and wolves.
These jackals are extremely bold and often come down the mountain to steal chickens and pigs from the village. As a result, every pig-raising household has to reinforce their pig pens. If they hear any noise at night, they have to come out to see if their pigs have been stolen by wolves.
Even Jiang's father, a grown man, felt nervous walking on this mountain road, let alone Jiang Ning, a little girl.
The more Jiang's father thought about it, the more worried he became. Sometimes he was worried about the wolves in the mountains, and sometimes he was worried about her running up the mountain alone. What if she met a bad guy? There is more than one village nearby.
His pace quickened.
Jiang Ning didn't expect that Jiang's father would come to see her.
She was used to being independent, and most of the time, she felt like an orphan.
Especially after her grandfather passed away, it seemed as if she was the only one in the world.
The world is so big, there is no place like home.
After that, she seldom came back, even during the Chinese New Year, she would find excuses not to come back.
Everyone in the village laughed at Jiang's father and mother: "They raised the girl in vain."
"What's the point of raising a girl? The big guy's family even raised her to be a college student, but she ran away and didn't even come back for the New Year!"
At that time, she was still unmarried, and Jiang's father asked her sadly: "How many more New Years can you spend at home?" What he meant was that after getting married, she would have to spend the New Year at someone else's home.
Father Jiang is a soft-hearted and affectionate man. He likes to have his children around him so that he can have fun and have fun. Unfortunately, except for the second brother, the eldest and the third brother are not around. None of them can be seen all year round.
Jiang Song's situation was even worse. There had been no news of him for several years. People said he had been deceived into a pyramid scheme. After finally getting in touch with him, it turned out that he had settled in Sichuan Province, more than a thousand kilometers away.
"Why are you here?" Jiang Ning turned on the light and came to open the door.
Father Jiang pulled her arm and said, "Come back with me. It's hard for us to stay here alone."
Jiang Ning was in a bad mood today. She slowly broke free from Jiang's father's hand and said, "What are you going to do? Are you going to get beaten?"
Father Jiang advised her: "Your mother has that kind of temper. She will be fine after a while. Just bear with it and wait until school starts."
The thing Jiang Ning hates to hear the most in her life is the word "endure". Her father taught her to endure her mother, and her mother taught her to endure the bullying of outsiders. There is really a knife above the word "endure", and every knife cuts her.
Jiang Ning sneered and sat on the bamboo chair made by her grandfather: "You are not the one being beaten, and you are not the one in pain, so of course you will ask me to endure it." She chuckled sarcastically and said, "I really don't understand. A normal father should protect his child when he sees him being beaten, instead of standing by and watching his child being beaten and doing nothing."
She sat on the chair, chin slightly raised, looking sideways at Father Jiang, her posture and tone relaxed as if she was talking about someone else, as if the person being beaten was not her. Her tone was calm and relaxed: "I often don't understand, and often reflect on what I did wrong, why I was always beaten."
"Later, I read a lot of books and realized that it wasn't me who was wrong. It was the people who committed the violence. They were shameless, twisted, dark and ugly violence workers!" Her tone suddenly became heavy, her eyes were sharp, but her tone was still so relaxed.
"Dad, Mom is an adult, and I'm just a child. You shouldn't persuade her to curb her temper, but instead persuade me to be patient. Dad, don't you think you're funny?"
"Aren't you just bullying me because I'm a child who can't resist you?"
"Mom has a bad temper? Why isn't she bad tempered with my brother? Why isn't she bad tempered with you?"
It was as if Jiang's father had never known his daughter. He could never have imagined that he would hear such words from his daughter's mouth.
This is the case in thousands of rural families. He said, "Your mother just beat you with bamboo strips, it won't hurt you..."
"How do you know I wasn't injured?" Jiang Ning thought she would be calm, but it turned out that her heart had never been calm, and the scars were always there and had never healed: "You are blind and can't see the bloodstains on my body, right? In your eyes, as long as I'm not beaten to death or disabled, I'm not considered injured?"
Jiang Ning couldn't help laughing again. She said, "Dad, you are not worthy of being a father, and she is not worthy of being a mother."
"If you gave birth to me just to treat me like a pig or a dog, then why did you give birth to me in the first place? Can I give this life back to you?"
She walked to her grandfather's stove, picked up a kitchen knife, and handed it to Jiang's father: "I beg you, please kill me, and I will give my life back to you."
The corners of her lips were even raised.
There has never been a moment when Jiang Ningru realized as clearly as she does now. She thought that she had finally healed herself through self-salvation and self-rescue in the process of growing up, but in fact she had not.
The deepest pain in her heart will always be there.
Father Jiang couldn't describe how shocked he was at the moment, he was even a little scared.
He was almost angry and snatched the kitchen knife from his daughter's hand, threw it into the corner of the wall while it was hot, "What nonsense are you talking about? What's the matter with killing or not? Your grandfather and I love you so much, and you hurt us by saying such things!"
Dad Jiang was really sad.
He was really hurt by Jiang Ning's words.
He felt very wronged and said, "How can a pig or dog go to school? How many people in the village have graduated from junior high school like you? Your grandfather and I encouraged you to go to high school and take the college entrance examination?"
Not to mention girls, there are many boys in the village who drop out of junior high school to work.
Jiang Ning is really heartless for saying such things.
"Your mother was a little rough with you, but which girl in the village didn't go through the same thing? She just scolded you a few times, and you took out your knives and guns, shouting and killing." Jiang's father was also in pain: "Ningning, no matter what, no matter what she did wrong, she is still your mother, the mother who gave birth to you and raised you!"
“So I give my life back to you.”
An unprecedented desire to commit suicide overwhelmed her like a huge wave.
That was something she had always had in her previous life. She had been restraining and resisting it, and had been fighting against it. Until this moment, it was infinitely magnified, surging, sweeping over her, enveloping and submerging her completely. She was unable to resist and could not break free.
She quickly ran to the wall, picked up the kitchen knife, and slashed it across her neck.
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