Chapter 2 2
Jiang Ning's hairstyle at this time was definitely not pretty. Half of her hair was long, and the other half was shaved off along the roots of the scalp. It was like the Mediterranean hair had grown in the wrong place and ran to the right back of her head. She looked like a funny villain in a funny martial arts drama.
But Jiang's mother couldn't smile at all.
She was stunned by Jiang Ning's sudden action. She had never expected that her usually quiet, well-behaved daughter would suddenly explode and be so cruel when she did.
If it was a little bit worse, the ears and scalp might be cut off.
At the same time, a surge of anger rose up into the sky.
For my daughter's resistance.
She grabbed Jiang Ning's hair and pointed at her nose: "Cut it off! Cut it off again! I want to see how many hairs you have to cut off! You're still cutting your hair? Do you want to scare me to death? Why don't you cut off your own head?"
She threw away the braid in her hand and was so angry that she wanted to rush over to hit her: "Cut it! Cut it again! If you have the guts, cut off my head!"
Because Jiang Ning had a sickle in her hand, she didn't dare to come forward to hit her again.
"Do you think you can scare me to death with a knife? And you dare to talk back to me?" Jiang Ma was tall and strong. She looked at the skinny Jiang Ning with disdain: "I'll let you go today, but if you dare to talk back to me again next time, I'll skin you alive!"
After that, he scolded her again: "Why are you still standing there like an idiot? Hurry up and cook the meal. Do you want me to serve you?"
Jiang's mother went to fetch water to wash her face. The heavy farm work made her even more tired and she slammed the washbasin on the washbasin stand with a loud clang: "A girl of your age, you don't know how to be sensible, how to be filial to your parents, and how efficient you are at work. Look at the girls in the village, which one doesn't go to work in the factory at the age of twelve or thirteen? Except you! You still want to go to school at the age of fifteen! What's the point of studying so much? You are as stupid as a goose and you still want to go to college!"
Jiang's mother had always called her stupid since she was a child, which gave her a psychological hint when she was young, wondering if she was really stupid.
Even after she became a "big shot" who was unattainable in the eyes of many people, she still felt that she was stupid.
The higher she climbed, the more smart and outstanding people she met, and she felt from the bottom of her heart that she was really not smart, so she became more humble, realistic, sincere, and down-to-earth in doing things, and she never had any bad intentions or was petty, because there were so many smart people around her.
But because of this, her leader trusts her more.
She just followed her leader and got promoted all the way.
As she rose higher in position, some people who once thought she was stupid now said she was wise but appeared foolish, while others said she was lucky.
Jiang Ning also felt that he was lucky.
Jiang Ma's voice kept coming from her ears, scolding: "Why don't you come out to cook? You still think you are a young lady staying in the embroidery building?" She became angrier and angrier as she spoke. Thinking of how she was frightened by her daughter just now, and how her daughter dared to talk back to her and run away when she was hit, the anger in her heart burst out. She threw things around in the living room and cursed loudly: "I don't know what sin I did in my previous life to give birth to such a debt collector. You are so busy during the double harvest, but you don't even help us harvest rice and don't even know how to cook dinner. You sleep at home and wait for me to come home to serve you! If I hit you twice, you will use a knife to fight me..."
Jiang's mother became angrier and angrier as she spoke, and she was about to cry. She shouted towards Jiang Ning's room, "Do you still want to kill me with a knife?"
"How old is he, and he dares to hold a knife? Will he dare to kill people in the future?"
"The family is in such a difficult situation. Your two older brothers are still studying, and your eldest brother will have to repeat his studies in the second half of the year. Can't you understand things? The girl is so old, but she has brought back tens of thousands of dollars. Da Meizi, who loves the country, went out to work at the age of twelve. Now she has built a big house!"
"Not only do you not make a penny, you also spend it on others!"
"Which little girl doesn't go out to work after learning a few words? I've been studying for you until you're old enough, but you've learned nothing from it!"
Jiang Ning had heard countless words like this since she was a child. They said that other girls went out to work early, but her family still sent her to school, asking her to be sensible, to remember the kindness given to her, to be good to them when she grew up, to be filial, and to be good to her two brothers.
Constantly brainwashed.
This kind of thinking is constantly being instilled in us.
It's like the PUA in the family.
Although at that time, Jiang Ning didn't know what PUA was.
But these things have been deeply engraved in Jiang Ning's bones and have become her subconscious reaction.
Even though she later realized that she had to fight against this instinct that was engraved in her soul again and again, and constantly redeemed herself in the process of growing up, some things had already penetrated deep into her soul and become a part of her character, and even if she resisted again and again, it was difficult to peel them off.
People with low self-esteem, people with a people-pleasing personality, and people with an avoidant personality feel that they are unworthy of other people's kindness. If others show a little kindness, they will be flattered and want to be grateful.
But how could it be unworthy?
She is so nice!
In the past, Jiang Ning would have been ashamed to hear these words from her mother, and would have been grateful and sensible enough to take the initiative to do the housework and share the burden of the family.
But this time, Jiang Ning sat on the bed in the room, as if he heard nothing and said nothing.
Mother Jiang got angry as she was talking. She stood in front of Jiang Ning's room and shouted, "Are you dead? It's so late and the meal isn't cooked yet, and you don't even come out to help? We've been busy outside all day, and when we come back we have to cook for you and serve you, a young lady, right?"
Even though Jiang Ning had already healed herself sufficiently, she still instinctively felt palpitations and fear when she heard her mother's scolding, and she couldn't help but want to obey.
She suppressed the thought, put down the sickle, found a pair of scissors, and cut the other half of her hair, trimming it into a half-inch haircut like a boy.
Looking at herself in the mirror who looked like a boy, she thought she looked very good.
She is really beautiful. Even though her skin is tanned due to double pregnancy, her eyebrows are untrimmed and have some stray hairs, and her hair is cut by herself like a dog's nest, she still has a kind of primitive, simple and messy beauty.
She has learned to appreciate her own beauty.
Everyone in the Jiang family is good-looking, especially Jiang's father.
Although Jiang's mother was not as pretty as Jiang's father, she also had a straight nose and regular facial features.
Jiang Ning's generation is even better than his parents. The three brothers and sisters in the Jiang family have inherited all the good qualities of their parents. Each one is more beautiful than the other, with thick eyebrows, big eyes and fair skin.
I still remember that when her second brother was a teenager, what he worried about most was that his skin was too white and he could never get tanned no matter what he did. He was a handsome boy and thought his skin was too white and looked like a girl's.
They know they are good-looking since they were young.
But Jiang Ning, who grew up with a critical and repressive education, has never felt that she is good-looking.
When did she realize she was beautiful? It was after she entered college that people around her looked at her with amazement and said that she was pretty. Gradually, she realized that, oh, she actually had a beautiful appearance.
But she grew up in a family environment where she was suppressed and criticized. Even though she knew that she was beautiful, she did not know how to appreciate herself.
At that time, there was a saying circulating on the Internet: beautiful appearances are all alike, but interesting souls are rare to find.
She felt deep down that her skin was all the same.
There is a kind of oppression that is engraved in your soul, and it cannot be redeemed by understanding the truth and starting to redeem yourself.
Jiang's mother kept cursing until Jiang Ning walked out of the room and came to the kitchen. She saw Jiang Ning's hair, glared at her, and then stopped.
She thought Jiang Ning's abnormal behavior today was because she told her not to continue her studies and asked her to drop out of school to work.
But she still had a cold face.
She lit the fire pit of the earthen stove and put some firewood in it, then she carried a basin into the house to take a bath and said, "Roast the meat and send it to your father and the others later."
Father Jiang was still in the field. He wanted to take advantage of the evening when it was not too hot to quickly bundle up the rice that had been drying in the rice fields all day and carry it to the rice field. Grandpa Jiang spread the rice he had carried on the field and used rolling stones to roll the rice into circles for threshing.
If we don’t do it now, the rice stalks in the rice fields will become heavy due to the dew by tomorrow morning.
There was only one pound of meat, which was given to the laborers in the family. She got nothing. Even though she also went to the fields to cut rice and plant rice seedlings, she was asked to be sensible and to learn to cherish the adults in the family because they worked hard.
She has been brought up like this since she was a child.
But even though she understood this truth, she still couldn't bear to watch them suffer so much. She really just watched and did nothing.
There were two pots on the stove. She washed the rice and poured it into the big pot, while water was boiling in the small pot.
While the water was boiling, she washed the meat and chopped it into minced meat together with the skin. When the water in the pot boiled, she scooped out some of the meat and put it into a thermos, then added ginger, garlic and the minced meat. She then went to the backyard to pick some vegetables and put them in. After a while, a pot of meat soup was ready.
She didn't let herself down and scooped out a bowl, placing it in the corner of the cupboard where bowls were kept.
If it were the her in the past, she would want to leave everything to her parents, thinking that they worked too hard and she wanted to feel sorry for them.
But no one ever thought of feeling sorry for her.
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