36. Innocence is evil
Eric's sudden appearance surprised Vivian. Although they were familiar with each other when they met, they were usually like two drops of water returning to the sea, disappearing without disturbing each other.
"What can I do for you?"
"Didn't we agree last time to invite me to your house for dinner? Didn't you forget?"
"No one comes uninvited like you."
"It's so late today, what should I do if I don't have food to eat?"
"Rogue." Vivian couldn't help laughing. "How about eating downstairs? There's nothing to eat at home. Are we going to order takeout?"
"Let's go."
"How did you know I was in the office?"
"He's very good at calculating."
"gab."
"If you pay a little attention, it's not difficult to find out."
The two walked all the way to a small restaurant downstairs from her apartment. Although the restaurant was unremarkable, Vivian had often gathered here with friends ten years ago. After so many years, it was still open and business was still good, which showed that the owner was quite capable.
When she moved in, she was pleasantly surprised to find this restaurant downstairs. When she was too lazy to cook, she would often grab something to eat here, almost treating it as a canteen.
"Eating here is like eating at my house. Just make do with it."
Eric shook his head.
She patted him and said, "Hey, you made a last-minute appointment. It's such a heinous crime that you didn't even have time to put on makeup. It's just you. I did promise you, but there's nothing I can do. I'll just forgive you. If it were someone else, I would have turned around and left long ago."
He smiled, his eyes a little vague. Somehow, Vivian always felt that he was different from before, as if he was particularly tired, his mind was wandering, and she didn't know where his mind was.
She was about to ask him what happened when she suddenly remembered something else: "Oh, let's get down to business first. Ziqi is planning to take over Sanchuan, right? Let me add one more thing, Amy is not that simple. Ziqi is so young, I may not be able to manage her well in the future."
"I never ask about these things."
"I can't say these things. First, she's in high spirits and might not want to be discouraged. Second, I'm an outsider, and an unpopular one at that. A few words of advice from you, whispering in her ear, will be more effective than my words."
He continued to shake his head. "That's a strange thing to say. If I weren't absolutely sure you didn't mean it that way, it would seem sour."
"Don't joke. I'm really worried about Ziqi. Even though she doesn't like me, I can't just ignore what I saw. So I'll just do a good deed."
He sighed, "No more talking. How about something to eat? I'm so hungry."
Vivian took charge and ordered two barbecue set meals. "When I first came to Beijing, I came here every week with my two best girlfriends. Back then, I felt that barbecue here truly was the taste of happiness. Now, I hardly see my two friends anymore, but thankfully, this place is still open."
"Why did you lose contact?"
"It's not like we've really lost touch. We still have our phone numbers and WeChat, and we can still see each other's Moments. I know more about her going to the play and practicing yoga than anyone else. Occasionally, we'll like each other's posts. But for no reason, we just won't hang out anymore. These days, if you don't see someone for a year or two, it's like you'll never see them again."
If even close friends are like this, what about men?
The waiter brought the sizzling barbecued meat, and the aroma of fat filled the air.
"Let's eat!" She clapped her hands, looking extremely happy.
He had no appetite. Lately, for some reason, his sleep had been particularly bad. Before, he'd have a bad night's sleep every three to five days, sometimes even a sleepless night. Now, that cycle had shortened to one or two days.
Whenever night fell, he became particularly nervous, because he didn't know if it would be followed by another extremely long, extremely terrifying, and deep night of sleeplessness.
When people can't sleep, they really feel like life is meaningless.
He went to see a doctor, who only advised him to lead a regular life, exercise appropriately, and prescribed some sleeping pills, but they were of little use.
He'd always been very disciplined, hitting the gym at least 200 days a year. After a few recent bouts of insomnia, he'd still insisted on working out. At one point, his heart raced, and he didn't dare go again. He wondered if he'd die suddenly.
He took melatonin, sleeping pills, and Sinus, but apart from feeling dizzy and weak the next day, it didn't help him recover.
"Why aren't you eating?" Vivian noticed that he didn't move his chopsticks.
"Don't be upset when I say something."
"You're allowed to say, it's not certain whether I'm happy or not." She had only eaten a bland sandwich for lunch that day and was now starving.
"At our age, few people can still enjoy eating like this."
"What are you talking about? Are you really that old?" Vivian thought. We're so strange. We know nothing about each other's age, education, and romantic history... It seems unimportant. So familiar and yet so strange.
Eric thought it wasn't about age, but rather the way many people acted when eating, fearing that one more bite would make them look less reserved or add an extra centimeter to their waistline. Hadn't she been this artificial before in front of him?
But now she seemed to not care about him at all. He was a little happy but also disappointed.
“Being able to eat more without gaining weight is amazing.”
"Why are you afraid of being fat? You've got muscles, and your basal metabolic rate is much higher than mine." She pointed at his bulging biceps. Even if she couldn't touch them, it would be good to just look at them. "Tell me, what happened today?"
She put down her chopsticks.
"Didn't you just get promoted? I wanted to congratulate you in person."
Vivian looked up at him.
He explained softly, "She says everything."
"Then Ziqi should have told you more than just this, right?"
"She...she's rather naive."
Vivian couldn't help but sneered.
Naive... She really hated naive people. But sometimes she couldn't help but envy them, because only when someone always had someone to cover for them could they retain this enviable innocence even after adulthood.
She herself seemed to have never been naive, always sensible and proper. But if you think about it, there is a truth in this that is hard to delve into.
These chaotic thoughts flashed through my mind in an instant.
Seeing the sarcasm on her face, he added cautiously, "...or maybe she's not very sensible. But of course, it's not my turn to say sorry on her behalf."
"Oh my God! I never expected to hear an apology." She didn't know why she suddenly became like a hedgehog and very irritable.
"Okay, okay, we shouldn't bring this up. Let's eat first." Eric knew this woman was soft-hearted and the more provoked she felt, the more sarcastic she became. But if you showed weakness, she'd become embarrassed and doubt whether she'd said or done something wrong.
As expected.
"What's the matter?" she softened her tone.
"Didn't you say you were sick last time? I wanted to see if you've recovered."
"Ziqi, didn't you realize that I was pretending to be sick?" she asked with a smile.
"I guess so, but I want to verify it."
"Hints come after the fact."
The atmosphere between the two of them eased slightly.
She asked casually, "I heard you guys are getting married soon?"
"Where's the good news? There's absolutely nothing."
"Zi Qi said it herself, and even gave me a set of cups."
He looked puzzled.
"Hahahaha, it's a Tiffany cup."
"If she wants to give you a gift, then so be it. After all, you're colleagues, and you're her coach, so it's not strange. But as for marriage...she's telling you this, it's just a proof that she really doesn't like you very much." His explanation was very ambiguous.
Vivian could vaguely guess why, but she still asked, "How do you say it?"
"Don't you think she's ridiculous? She even got jealous of you."
"In all honesty, the three of us were together only once. I probably didn't speak to you more than three sentences that day, and that was just some meaningless nonsense like 'Your song has arrived'."
"Her exact words were: 'Aren't you two familiar with each other? Why do you seem to be so in sync? I'm upset. You're not allowed to talk to Sister V anymore.'"
"Hahahaha." Vivian couldn't help but burst out laughing. It was like she was back in elementary school. Who else had ever said you couldn't talk to someone? "You're just looking for an excuse to act cute, idiot."
"Nothing is serious in her world. Anything can be solved by acting coquettishly or crying, and the other party will definitely admit defeat. She doesn't understand me."
Vivian laughed. "I've only ever heard of married men confiding in others, 'I'm so upset, my wife doesn't understand me.' You're not even married yet, how come you've already picked up this bad habit? This is not good."
He ignored her and continued, "So, to her, the word 'marriage' seems like a huge reward for anyone. Her family feels even more so. Do you know how harsh that statement is?"
Vivian reached out and patted him as a comfort.
She didn't want to ask further.
At this moment, she was a little selfish. She didn't want to share his trivial pain, she didn't want to know his miserable side. She just wanted him to always be the carefree and carefree person he was.
He changed the subject and asked, "Guess why I had to look for you today?"
"You say."
"It's not that I thought you were sick. In fact, I didn't believe it at the time."
"Ziqi should have guessed it later." She smiled bitterly, "Now everyone says I betrayed my boss and am not a good person."
"That's not it." Eric patted her arm and moved his hand away.
It was interesting. Being alone with a man and a woman, he was such a gentleman.
"That day she insisted on taking me out for dinner. It was a very slow meal, but I was a little distracted and probably didn't talk enough. She got upset and left in anger. We haven't reconciled yet."
Vivian curled her lips. The scene of Qiu Fang and her having that long, boring meal was still vivid in her mind. It was indeed very boring.
She shook her head, pushing the matter that should have been forgotten long ago out of her mind, and listened to him continue.
"I should have apologized."
"Then why don't you go? Why are you still sitting here?" She scratched the table with her nails.
"I suddenly realized that she was right to be angry. At that time, I really didn't care whether she was happy or not. I was actually thinking, I don't know what you are doing at this time."
"I?"
He shrugged and raised his hands in surrender. "I'm not trying to curry favor with you by saying this now. I just wanted to talk about this strange feeling I have, and telling the person involved seems like the only option."
She glanced at him. "I thought it was a big deal. Who said friends can't think of each other occasionally?"
Eric heard the hidden meaning in her words, as if she was intentionally distancing herself. He sighed, "When I was a kid, I read 'The Smiling, Proud Wanderer.' Linghu Chong led the others to attack Shaolin Temple to rescue Ren Yingying. The two sides were facing off, and a fight was imminent. But at that moment, between life and death, Linghu Chong was thinking, 'I wonder what my little apprentice sister is doing right now?' I didn't understand it at the time."
"You mean to say, 'You understand now?' But the part that impressed me the most was before that. Seeing the snow falling, Linghu Chong thought, 'It's freezing cold, I wonder if Yingying has any warm clothes on?' He never just thought about what Junior Sister was doing."
"I forgot about that part."
"So maybe he's just a sentimental INFP who falls in love with every woman he meets."
Eric shook his head. "You are really... a piece of rock."
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