074 | (Seventy-three) Going Home
"you……"
"Xie Qingyan, since you lied to me, you should have kept lying to me."
Xie Qingyan paused for a moment, the torrential rain striking his heart heavily.
The two stood there quietly, separated by the curtain of rain. He looked at her, then reopened his umbrella and held it over her head: "Let's go back, don't get wet."
Xie Qingyan couldn't remember how he got home. Perhaps it was a word from that sentence, or perhaps it was the look in his eyes that was so profound that he couldn't forget it... so much so that when he reached the door, his mind was still a mess.
With her home right in front of her, Xie Qingyan's light steps became sluggish. She moved in small, hesitant steps, lingering and reluctant to move forward.
She really said some harsh words to Xie Jinyu this time, causing a big disaster, and she'll probably face some criticism.
Su Xingmao took a step forward, turned around and waited for her. He could see through her hesitation without her having to say anything.
"Go back and talk to Aunt Xie properly, she won't blame you."
His gaze was always so sharp, like an eagle's, always able to easily see through her thoughts.
Xie Qingyan muttered under her breath, "Who needs you to teach me?"
"Then why don't you leave?"
Xie Qingyan glared at him fiercely. Didn't he understand that she could see through him but not say anything? She straightened her back and walked forward, deliberately bumping into his shoulder, and threatened him in a harsh voice: "Who said I'm not leaving? I still have something to say."
Su Xingmao lowered his eyes, quietly waiting for her to continue.
Xie Qingyan hesitated for a moment before trying to make conversation: "Remember this well, you're not allowed to tell anyone about what happened between you and me, understand?"
"Hmm," he replied indifferently.
The doorbell rang.
When Xie Jinyu opened the door and saw her daughter, soaked to the bone like a drowned rat, her anger immediately subsided.
She quickly pulled her daughter into the house, thanked Su Xingmao who was also soaked in the rain, and told him to go back and change his clothes.
Su Xingmao nodded without saying anything, then turned and walked back into the rain.
Xie Qingyan followed her mother into the bathroom without looking back.
When she came out of the hot bath, Xie Jinyu had already prepared warm ginger soup.
Upon seeing Xie Jinyu this time, Xie Qingyan was like a mouse seeing a cat. He no longer dared to show the arrogance he had displayed on the phone. He stammered as he took the white porcelain bowl and sipped the drink slowly.
She didn't look up, only staring at the empty bottom of the bowl, her lips pursed slightly.
Xie Jinyu is not a woman with a good temper.
All I can do is drink slowly, even slower, silently delaying the moment of judgment, even if it's a little later.
After waiting for a long time, not a single harsh word came, and the expected scolding did not occur.
Xie Qingyan hesitated and looked up, only to meet Xie Jinyu walking over with a towel, gently placing it on her head. Her usually serious face showed a hint of concern: "You're so old, and you still can't dry your hair."
Xie Qingyan looked down and saw that her hair was still dripping water.
She had something on her mind, so she took a quick shower and hastily dried her hair. The rest of her long hair was still wet and hanging over her shoulders. In just a short while, a small patch of her shirt was already wet.
"Mom..." Xie Qingyan, being easily swayed, couldn't hide her feelings. After a moment of hesitation, she asked, "Aren't you angry?"
Xie Jinyu tapped her forehead and gave her a disgruntled look: "Not angry? With a troublemaker like you in my life, I could report to the King of Hell three years earlier than expected. I only found out it was because I was angry."
"Mom, I was wrong, please don't say that..."
Hearing her mother's joking tone, Xie Qingyan knew that her anger had subsided and she had become bolder. She leaned against her mother, raised her clean face, blinked her eyes, hugged her mother's arm, and gently shook it, acting coquettishly: "Then why don't you yell at me when you're angry anymore?"
"Xie Qingyan, no one wants to be mean to you." Xie Jinyu pushed her away, rubbing her temples with her fingers. When had it not been like this? Even if they were to be a little harsh and punish her, she would always be fooled by these seemingly submissive little actions.
"It's because you never listen to me."
He'll cause trouble again next time, and his "I won't do it again" is never real.
Xie Jinyu, though sharp-tongued, had a kind heart. She picked up a hairdryer from the dressing table, turned it to the lowest setting, and gently dried the wet ends of her daughter's hair that she couldn't reach.
The warm air seeped into the pores of the back of Xie Qingyan's neck, and she squinted comfortably, then pouted: "I've been very obedient lately, I've finished all my homework... and I haven't caused any trouble."
Her big eyes darted around—except for this afternoon, but that was all because of Su Xingmao. It was all his fault; he had confused her, made her say and do all sorts of nonsense.
"I'll pretend I didn't hear what you said today, but you're not allowed to say it again, especially not in front of Su Xingmao."
As Xie Jinyu slowly dried her hair, she took a wooden comb and carefully combed it from top to bottom. Xie Qingyan's eyebrows and eyes resembled Zhang Fulan's, with a deep, dark blue like the dawn breaking. Her thick, long black hair was just like hers, smooth and silky, a bouncy bunch, like spring grass, so vibrant that it was almost impossible to hold it.
"Why?" Just when I finally managed to suppress my unhappiness, it started to surface again.
Xie Jinyu was busy all year round, so the mother and daughter rarely had time to sit down and talk. Xie Qingyan didn't want to beat around the bush, so she decided to speak frankly.
"Mom, I'm unhappy because you favor him." Xie Qingyan snorted unhappily, "From childhood to adulthood, you've always compared him to me and never seen my good points."
Xie Jinyu patiently asked, "Then tell me, what are your strengths?"
Xie Qingyan raised her face in the mirror and confidently met her mother's eyes: "I draw so beautifully, my teachers all praise my talent, I am popular, and I have many friends at school. Only you, Mom, are always picking on me."
"He's only slightly better than me in terms of grades."
Xie Jinyu's previously tense face almost broke into a smile: "Just a little bit?"
"Just a little!" Xie Qingyan insisted. "Besides, Mom, you know I want to study fine arts, so it's normal for my academic background to be a little lacking."
Looking at her proud daughter through the mirror, Xie Jinyu's hardened heart softened. She gently placed her hand on her daughter's shoulder and sighed.
"Yanyan, I admit I've been a bit too strict with your studies these past few years. But in my heart, you'll always be number one. I've been good to Xiaoxing..." Xie Jinyu said to her.
“You’re still too young to understand that raising children isn’t about spoiling them. You’re my daughter, and naturally I want you to be outstanding and independent, so I’m stricter with you. Besides, you’re going to study abroad in the future, and your father is busy and can’t take care of you in many ways. If I don’t temper your temperament now, how can I feel at ease leaving you out there to play without any discipline later? But I’m also a first-time mother, and there are many things I haven’t done well…”
“I know,” Xie Qingyan replied, her voice muffled, as if she was trying her best to hold something back and not let it out: “Mom, you always say I’m immature, but I’ve never asked you to give up your work to be with me. I know that work is very important to you, and I know that you love your career.”
Xie Qingyan lifted her lowered eyelashes and looked through the mirror at her mother combing her hair.
When she was little, Xie Jinyu often styled her hair. Her hair was beautiful, black and silky, shiny and smooth, thick and tufted, perfect for braiding all sorts of little braids.
Double braids, pigtails, fishtail braids, scorpion braids... every day they changed her hairstyle, making her look smart and beautiful. She was the most popular little girl at the foot of Lingquan Mountain. When her father took her out, he would praise her to everyone he met on the way down the mountain.
But that was a long time ago.
Later on, Dad was not with us, and Mom became increasingly busy.
Her eyes were moist and bright, and her nose tingled: "I don't like to cause trouble or make a mess, but you only talk to me more when the report card comes out. I also want Mom to spend more time with me."
"Yan Yan..." Xie Jinyu paused in combing her hair, accidentally pulling her hair.
Xie Qingyan hissed and whispered in pain.
"I'm sorry," Xie Jinyu said hurriedly.
After her divorce, Xie Jinyu focused on her career and realized very late that she was not a good mother, not even responsible. In her world, self was above all else.
She always thought she had given her child the right education, the best learning environment, and the best material conditions... but what she lacked most was the love and companionship her daughter needed most.
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