Chapter 63
On the second day of the New Year, Ren Ruiyun and Cheng Jiaming both slept in. When they arrived at the executive lounge for breakfast, there were already only a few customers in the restaurant.
Cheng Jiaming gripped the edge of the table, lowered his head, and slurped up milk like a puppy drinking water. Ren Ruiyun said, "Jiaming, don't make noise when you drink."
Cheng Jiaming blankly let out an "Ah".
Ren Ruijun thought he hadn't understood, so she added, "Table manners: making noise while eating is very impolite."
"Oh." Cheng Jiaming understood and picked up his cup to take a small sip. After a few sips, he noticed Ren Ruijun's displeased gaze.
"Jiaming, stop swinging your legs."
Upon hearing this, Cheng Jiaming abruptly brought his legs together. Having been criticized by his mother twice in a row, he lowered his head as if he had done something wrong.
"Jiaming, always remember, a person's posture is their first impression. Look at how you slouch now, do you think it looks good?"
Cheng Jiaming followed Ren Ruiyun's gaze and saw a dejected reflection in the side window. He adjusted his posture in front of the mirror, straightening his neck, but still feeling it wasn't straight enough, he pulled his chin back forcefully before cautiously glancing at Ren Ruiyun: "Mom, is this okay?"
Ren Ruiyun sighed inwardly. This child was far from satisfactory. He inherited Cheng Yu's appearance, being simple-minded and honest, but lacked Cheng Yu's rebellious and unrestrained personality, and bore no resemblance whatsoever to the calm and decisive Shen Hanyang. Overall, he was a child who wasn't particularly wrong, but also unremarkable, far removed from her ideal. His only redeeming quality was his obedience; he followed her every command, believing whatever she said and doing whatever she asked. It was precisely because of this that, with the child's help, she was able to easily orchestrate a drama that sowed discord between Yan Qing and Shen Hanyang.
"I can't say it has no merits," Ren Ruiyun told herself.
Perhaps out of guilt, she proactively spread a slice of buttered toast on a piece of bread and handed it to Cheng Jiaming. The gloomy look on Cheng Jiaming's face immediately vanished, replaced by happiness: "Thank you, Mom!"
Ren Ruiyun's breakfast was very simple: black coffee and a slice of toast. After giving the toast to Cheng Jiaming, she only had a cup of coffee left. Cheng Jiaming, on the other hand, had a table full of various desserts and cakes. Ren Ruiyun wasn't entirely satisfied with Cheng Jiaming's choice. She wanted to say that high society was ashamed of indulging in gluttony. But looking at Cheng Jiaming's expression, she felt he might not understand the meaning of that statement. This somewhat dim-witted child had come from her womb and was now her only link to Shen Hanyang…
Thinking of all this, Ren Ruiyun felt somewhat disheartened. She picked up the cup by the handle, turned her head to the window, and saw the cold clouds gathering. Her chest felt as if it were stuffed with moldy cotton, a tightness in her chest. Her gaze briefly swept over Cheng Jiaming's face. The boy, having listened to her admonition, sat up straight and slowly savored the buttered toast she had given him.
Ren Ruiyun felt as if she were looking at a stranger.
She asked herself, bewildered. Wasn't this the child she had carried for ten months? Eight years ago, on the day she left, she cried all night, holding her infant son, not even four months old. The little baby slept soundly in his swaddling clothes, completely unaware that his mother was leaving him. But now, why did she feel nothing at all? Perhaps she couldn't be blamed. Who said that giving birth automatically evokes maternal love? If this were her and Shen Hanyang's child, at least it would be a very handsome boy, and she would certainly love him even more. Or, if Cheng Yu were still alive, she would already be the rightful Mrs. Cheng, and she would be a dutiful and loving mother. But now, neither of those things existed. She had only spent a few days with this little boy after their reunion; how could she force herself to love him as much as she loved herself? Why? That went against human nature.
"Mother?"
Cheng Jiaming's call interrupted her reverie. A croissant appeared on the plate in front of her, cut crookedly in half and covered with a thick layer of jam. "Mom," Cheng Jiaming said, "I made you a strawberry jam sandwich." Cheng Jiaming had just noticed Ren Ruiyun's empty plate and, while she was lost in thought, had taken a piece of his own bread and thoughtfully added jam before serving it to her.
Ren Ruiyun didn't like croissants, and she never touched sweet jam. She smiled slightly: "Thank you, are you finished eating? Would you like some more fruit?" Cheng Jiaming seemed completely oblivious to the fact that his hospitality was being ignored. He also took a bite of the jam-covered bread, the sweetness of sharing breakfast with his mother melting in his mouth.
"Mother."
"Um?"
"It's nothing, hehe." Cheng Jiaming got a little carried away and swung his legs a couple more times before suddenly realizing what he was doing and quickly stopping.
Ren Ruiyun felt inexplicably annoyed. In order to align herself with Cheng Jiaming, she had shown him meticulous care, only to find it was all unnecessary. The boy's kindness towards her was practically self-deception; she had effortlessly gained a devoted follower. However, before she was ready to play her role, Cheng Jiaming was already hopelessly immersed in her excessive "motherly love," calling her "Mom" constantly, almost addicted, hundreds of times a day. He had become a birthmark on her, something inextricably linked to her, something she couldn't sever. This made her feel uneasy. She wasn't confident about Shen Hanyang, yet he kept pressuring her to discuss custody. She was afraid she was going in the wrong direction…
With something on her mind, she followed Cheng Jiaming back to the room. Cheng Jiaming called out, "Old Shen?"
Ren Ruiyun looked up at the sound and saw Shen Hanyang sitting alone on the living room sofa, playing with a plush toy in his hand.
Cheng Jiaming was excited: "Why are you here?" He turned to look at Ren Ruiyun, "Mom, do we have an activity today?"
Ren Ruiyun's gaze remained fixed on Shen Hanyang's emotionless face; she knew very well what had brought him here.
"Jiaming, go back to your bedroom. Your parents have something to talk about," she said to Cheng Jiaming, adding, "Don't come out without your mother's permission."
Cheng Jiaming's gaze darted between Ren Ruiyun and Shen Hanyang a few times before he belatedly sensed that something was off. He let out an "Oh" and returned to his room, somewhat dejected.
Ren Ruiyun took a drink from the refrigerator, but Shen Hanyang didn't take it. She placed it on the coffee table in front of him and sat down on the single sofa next to him.
She rested her chin on her hand and looked at him from the side: "I thought you would dedicate New Year's Day to my son and me."
Shen Hanyang didn't even look at her: "I'm afraid my presence will disrupt your plans."
Ren Ruiyun tapped her cheek lightly with her sharp red fingernails. "Such a handsome face, yet you look so bitter and resentful. You're not in a good mood, are you?"
Shen Hanyang sneered and remained silent.
Tell me, and I'll see if I can help you.
After a long while, she finally met Shen Hanyang's cold eyes.
"Thanks to you, she moved out of my place. Are you satisfied now?"
Ren Ruijun pretended not to understand him: "What do you mean? Who moved out?"
Shen Hanyang chuckled: "Are you that forgetful? Let me remind you, Yan Qing, do you remember now?"
Ren Ruiyun glanced at him discreetly, then leaned back on the sofa, pulled a cushion into her arms, and settled into a very languid position. "You mean Jiaming's tutor?" she chuckled. "Jiaming keeps telling me how wonderful his teacher is. Yesterday I invited her over to express my gratitude. What, is that wrong?"
A layer of dark clouds covered the cold, sunny face, making even the air feel chilly.
No one spoke, so Ren Ruiyun had to speak again: "I don't understand why you're angry. I just had a meal and chatted with her, and didn't say anything offensive. That girl did something stupid because of that? Isn't that going too far..."
After a few seconds of silence, Shen Hanyang sighed and said with emotion, "Ruiyun, I regret it."
Ren Ruiyun quietly observed him; the weariness in his expression couldn't escape her eyes. Regret—was it the kind of regret she longed for? Her suspicion wasn't unfounded. Shen Hanyang wasn't an ordinary man; childish behavior like throwing a tantrum and running away from home over trivial matters wasn't to his liking. Young girls didn't understand him and could easily step on his landmines; what exception was Yan Qing?
But she remained calm and composed, tilting her head and looking at him blankly, waiting for him to continue.
After a while, Shen Hanyang said in a deep voice, "I really regret not finding out about your mess sooner, which gave you the opportunity to harass her." Without giving her a chance to argue, his gaze swept across her face like a blade. "Today is the last time I'll see you. What about Jiaming? What have you decided?"
Ren Ruiyun's lips still held a slight upward curve. She had weathered many storms and wasn't so easily caught off guard. She took a deep breath and composed herself: "It's always been my principle not to discuss work during holidays."
“I’m not negotiating with you. If you insist on avoiding me, I’ll take Jiaming away now and never come looking for you again.”
"Heh, impressive." Ren Ruiyun pursed her lips slightly, a smile spreading across her eyes. "Forcing me to give you an answer? Fine, I already gave you an answer, didn't I? You, and Jiaming, I want them both."
Suppressing his anger, Shen Hanyang said, "Don't use the child as a bargaining chip. Do you know how much Jiaming loves you? Do you know how much he's missed you these past few years?"
"And what about you? Do you still love me and miss me?"
Ren Ruiyun stretched out her right hand, her index fingertip gently tracing the back of Shen Hanyang's hand. Her nails, a deep, blood-red hue, left a fleeting, tingling sensation on his thin, pale skin. Shen Hanyang stared at her for a moment, then grabbed the restless finger with his own.
Ren Ruiyun's almond-shaped eyes were filled with spring-like affection, her gaze sending autumn waves, but before this tender feeling could reach the person on the other side, it was cut short in mid-air by a few sarcastic words.
"Don't waste your time." She heard Shen Hanyang say. The next second, her hand was violently slapped back.
Ren Ruiyun gently blew on her sore finger a few times, then gave Shen Hanyang a coquettish look: "You're so willing to use force!"
She was like a graceful water plant; it was difficult for anyone to bend her. Shen Hanyang's patience was almost exhausted. Thinking of Cheng Jiaming, he calmly said one last time, "Stop beating around the bush, let's talk about the child."
Ren Ruiyun didn't take the bait: "Let's talk about the two of us first."
"There is absolutely no possibility between us." Shen Hanyang left no room for negotiation.
"Do you really have to keep bringing up that past? I did make a mistake, but it's been eight years. I've been punished enough. Shouldn't I be released by now?"
“It has nothing to do with the past. Let’s leave that topic here and get back to Jiaming. This recording puppy,” Shen Hanyang picked up the plush toy in his hand, “have you heard of it?”
Ren Ruiyun stared at the dirty, old toy poodle, one of Cheng Jiaming's few pieces of luggage when she picked him up from home to the hotel. He kept pestering her to play the recording for him, but her mind was on Shen Hanyang and Yan Qing, so she always found excuses to postpone it.
“This toy dog is something I brought back for him from Japan. It has a recording function. When Jiaming misses you, he records what he wants to say to you. Shouldn’t you listen to your child’s feelings?”
Looking at the toy Shen Hanyang handed her, Ren Ruiyun felt as if he were forcibly shoving the infant she had so painstakingly abandoned years ago back into her arms. This sent a chill down her spine, and her face turned cold: "You told me not to use the child as a bargaining chip, but what are you doing now? Playing the family card with me?"
"A card?" Shen Hanyang sneered. "Do you think everyone is as calculating as you? If it weren't for Jiaming, I wouldn't want to waste another minute with you. Stop being so stubborn; Jiaming needs you."
“Jiaming needs more than just me; he needs a complete family,” Ren Ruiyun said firmly. “I can see that you care deeply about Jiaming. Have you considered that if you reject me, you will lose Jiaming? Can you really accept that?”
“Even if you don’t show up, I still plan to send him back to his grandmother’s place in Hong Kong after the New Year.”
"Hanyang, I know you best. You can't fool me. You're not as cold-blooded and heartless as you seem. Even if you've raised a kitten or a puppy for eight or nine years, you wouldn't just give it away like that, let alone Jiaming, who has called you 'Dad' for so many years?"
“I do have feelings for Jiaming, but that’s no reason for you to kidnap me. Besides, I’ve been clear from the beginning that Jiaming will eventually have to return to his family; that’s the best choice for him.”
Ren Ruiyun laughed dismissively: "If you could send Jiaming back, you would have done it already."
“The situation is different now. I told you this is a very good opportunity. Perhaps you can make good use of this opportunity to both repair your relationship with Jiaming and get what you want…”
"No way!" Ren Ruiyun refused without hesitation, her attitude hardening. "Do you think that just because I'm with Jiaming, the Cheng family will accept me? You have no idea how deep the waters run in the Cheng family, how treacherous they are! You always see things so simplistically!" Her voice suddenly rose at the last sentence, startling Cheng Jiaming, who was pressed against the bedroom door listening intently. He considered opening the door and leaving, but then remembered Ren Ruiyun's instructions to stay in the bedroom. Not wanting to anger Ren Ruiyun, he could only continue listening anxiously.
In Leju Residential Community, Huang Yanxiang received a call from Cheng Jiaming. Cheng Jiaming's voice was soft, but the worry and anxiety in his voice were palpable: "Xiangxiang, my mom and dad are arguing, I'm scared..."
Huang Yanxiang said irritably, "You're so spineless. Haven't you ever seen adults arguing before?"
Cheng Jiaming stammered, "But...but...I'm afraid Dad will make Mom angry and leave..."
Huang Yanxiang laughed: "So what if he's angry and leaves? My dad made my mom leave."
Hearing this, Huang Qian gave her a questioning look and muttered in dissatisfaction, "Why are you dragging me into this? Whose call was it?"
Huang Yanxiang covered the receiver and said, "Cheng Jiaming, his parents are arguing."
Huang Qian quickly held up a finger, but it was too late. Yan Qing, who was reading current events to Gong Meiping at the dining table, paused, clearly having overheard their conversation.
Yan Qing suddenly came to the house today, looking haggard. Huang Qian asked her a few questions, but couldn't get any information out of her. It was only when Huang Yanxiang secretly whispered in her mother's ear, "She broke up with her boyfriend," that Huang Qian found out what had happened.
Huang Yanxiang's mind worked quickly, and she said to the person on the other end of the phone with a sense of righteousness, "Don't be afraid, go live, I'll be with you."
Cheng Jiaming secretly opened the door a crack and pointed his phone at the living room.
The atmosphere in the living room was tense, and no one noticed Cheng Jiaming's subtle movements. Ren Ruiyun continued her story, her tone shifting from high-spirited to sorrowful: "I'm eight years older than you, and we've been separated for eight years. These aren't just numbers; they represent countless drops of blood and tears. Do you understand? Do you know what kind of life a woman has endured abroad all these years!"
Shen Hanyang remained unmoved: "You have your own difficulties, but Jiaming is your inescapable responsibility."
Ren Ruiyun also expressed her sarcasm: "In the end, you still want to dump Jiaming on me. Do you know how difficult it is for a single mother in this society? What kind of predicament will a child without a father face? You keep saying you're doing it for Jiaming's own good, but you're not even willing to give him a complete family!"
Shen Hanyang looked at him as if he were a madman: "Ren Ruiyun, how could you say such a thing? If it weren't for your selfishness, Jiaming wouldn't have had to live without his mother for eight years, and I wouldn't be facing this contradictory situation today!"
"You're more selfish than me! You're abandoning your child for a tutor of dubious origin!"
Shen Hanyang had originally intended to negotiate peacefully, but Ren Ruiyun's unyielding attitude infuriated him. His anger, which had been building up all night, was about to erupt: "Ren Ruiyun, after all these years, you still haven't changed your ways. Originally, I didn't want to say anything too harsh because you're Jiaming's mother, but now it seems you're simply beyond redemption!"
"Am I hopeless or are you? Getting involved with your child's tutor, aren't you afraid of being gossiped about?"
"It's none of your business to comment on my affairs," Shen Hanyang said coldly.
"Have you investigated Yan Qing's background? She doesn't even have parents, she's from the countryside, and her family has a gambler and a murderer—quite a show-off. You can have your fun with her, but is it really worth coming to me and making a scene over her?"
Shen Hanyang's face was as cold as iron: "I'm warning you one last time, I don't have time for idle chatter. Child, do you want it or not?"
Ren Ruiyun's throat trembled: "You were the one who rejected him first."
Silence fell between the two of them.
After a long silence, Shen Hanyang let out a sigh and nodded. "I understand what you mean. I will send Jiaming to Hong Kong, and you won't have to worry about this burden anymore." Before getting up, he handed over the toy dog in his hand: "This is for you. Listen if you want, or get rid of it if you don't."
For some reason, Ren Ruiyun felt a sharp pain in her lower abdomen, as if a knife were stabbing into her skin. Was that annoying birthmark finally going to be removed? She touched her stomach and realized the pain wasn't on her skin, but deep within her abdomen. She suddenly felt her carefully concealed vulnerabilities exposed, and in a fit of rage, she snatched the toy from Shen Hanyang's hand and threw it on the ground: "What kind of recording puppy is this? You're acting abnormally just because the child doesn't understand!"
"Don't throw it! Don't throw it! It'll break!" Cheng Jiaming screamed as he ran out of the room, kneeling on the floor and hugging his beloved toy. He pressed the power button, and the red dot between the dog's eyebrows flashed, proving that the recording function was still working. He looked up, tears welling up in his eyes: "Mom, don't be angry, I'll be good, I listen to Mom the most."
Ren Ruiyun's eyes also reddened. She gritted her teeth and said, "Jiaming, don't blame your mother. It's your father who insists on being with your teacher Yan. It's your father who doesn't want his mother and wants to drive her away."
On the other end of the phone, several people looked at Yan Qing with concern.
Her face was deathly pale.
Gong Meiping held her withered, aged hand. After a moment, Gong Meiping felt something warm dripping onto the back of her hand. She then realized that tears were silently sliding down Yan Qing's cheeks and down her lifeless face.
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