Chapter 10
Lü Xiaoyan returned home, carrying a hint of weariness and deeper thoughts. Uncle Li's words were like a wedge, driving into his habitually closed-off heart, forcing him to re-examine his relationship with photography and with the world.
The first thing he did upon returning to school was to go straight to the darkroom without even going back to his dorm to put down his luggage. As he pushed open that familiar door, the smell of chemicals mixed with a faint, fresh scent that belonged to Qiu Yayu wafted towards him, giving him a strange sense of peace and security as if he were "returning home."
On the workbench lay a small, exquisitely packaged bag of maple leaf candy, with a note underneath in Qiu Yayu's delicate handwriting: "Welcome back! I heard this candy is shaped like a maple leaf, it feels so autumnal :)"
The simple gesture instantly dispelled his fatigue from the long journey and the slight confusion in his heart. He picked up a piece of candy, its maple leaf shape lifelike, and put it in his mouth, the sweet taste spreading. He remembered what Uncle Li had said about "emotions," and looking at the note, a corner of his heart softened.
He took out his phone and sent her a message: "I'm back."
Almost the instant the message was sent successfully, the chat window displayed "The other party is typing...", followed by a lively reply: "!!! Senior, you're back! Are you in the darkroom? I'm coming right away!"
A few minutes later, the door to the darkroom was gently pushed open, and Qiu Yayu burst in, bringing with her the cool air of the outdoors and a bright smile. She wore a warm yellow sweater, which made her cheeks rosy, and her eyes were strikingly bright, as if they were filled with the sunshine of autumn.
"Senior!" She saw him, her eyes crinkling into crescents. "How are things at home?"
"Mm." Lü Xiaoyan looked at her and nodded. Her appearance instantly filled the somewhat deserted space with life. He noticed that the tip of her nose was a little red, not knowing whether it was from running or from the wind.
"That's good!" Qiu Yayu breathed a sigh of relief, then her eyes lit up with a mischievous and expectant look, like a little animal waiting to be fed, gazing at him expectantly, "Then... our 'make-up'..."
Looking at her undisguised expectation, Lü Xiaoyan felt the stagnation in his heart caused by reflection dissipate. He remembered the promise he had written on the note before leaving, the thoughts about her that had occasionally crossed his mind this week, and Uncle Li's words, "Take a step forward."
He didn't answer immediately, but turned around and took out something carefully wrapped in a soft cloth from his camera bag.
Qiu Yayu looked on curiously.
He unwrapped the layers of soft cloth, revealing a camera underneath. It wasn't his usual professional SLR, but a well-maintained rangefinder film camera that looked quite old. The body showed subtle signs of use, which only enhanced its quality; the brass components gleamed with a warm luster under the red light of the darkroom.
"This is..." Qiu Yayu asked, somewhat puzzled.
“It’s what my father used when he was young.” Lü Xiaoyan’s voice was calm, but with a solemn tone. “Uncle Li… is the elder I went to see. He said that the most important thing in photography is to convey emotions.” He paused, his gaze falling on her face. In those eyes that always seemed indifferent, there was now a clear turmoil. “I want to… try to photograph something different.”
He handed the rangefinder camera to her.
Qiu Yayu was stunned. She looked at the camera, then at him, not understanding what he meant for a moment. Her heart, however, was racing uncontrollably, pounding against her chest.
“Here you go,” Lü Xiaoyan said, her tone clearer and more determined than ever before. “Use it to shoot what you want to shoot. Don’t worry about technique, just capture the moments that resonate with you.”
Qiu Yayu was completely stunned. Her eyes widened slightly as she looked at him in disbelief, then at the camera he clearly cherished. "Give...give it to me? This is too valuable..."
“It needs to be used, not collected.” Lü Xiaoyan interrupted her, pushing the camera forward until it almost touched her hand. “And,” he looked at her, his eyes deep, as if trying to draw her in, “I want to see… what the world looks like through your eyes.”
I want to see the world through your eyes.
These words exploded in Qiu Yayu's ears like a thunderclap. All other sounds faded away, leaving only the deafening pounding of her own heart. She looked at the camera he handed her, at the unmistakable seriousness and... a kind of tender expectation in his eyes.
This was not an ordinary loan; it was a sharing, an invitation, a silent declaration of bringing her into his most important domain.
The red light of the darkroom blurred the boundaries of reality, and the pervasive smell of chemicals seemed to become a catalyst for courage. Qiu Yayu felt her cheeks burning and her blood rushing. She took a deep breath, didn't take the camera, but instead raised her head and bravely met his deep gaze.
“Lü Xiaoyan,” her voice trembled slightly with nervousness, yet remained unusually clear, “you gave it to me because of Uncle Li’s words, or because…you wanted to give it to me?”
She asked directly, with a desperate courage. She didn't want to guess anymore, didn't want to wait for the promise written on the note. She wanted a clear answer, about him, about her, about them.
Lu Xiaoyan was stunned by her direct question. He looked at her lips, pursed in nervousness, and at the glint in her eyes, a mixture of expectation and unease. The self that had been hiding behind the camera for so long, accustomed to observation and silence, was now cornered by her burning gaze.
Uncle Li's words were the trigger, but the real source was the tenderness he felt when he saw her note, the longing that kept surfacing during his week-long absence, and the presence of her standing before him now, making the entire gray and white world vibrant and impossible to ignore.
Silence stretched between them, each second feeling like an eternity.
Finally, Lü Xiaoyan slowly withdrew her hand from the camera, but took a small step forward. The distance between them instantly closed, close enough that they could feel each other's breath and see their own reflection in each other's pupils.
He lowered his head, his gaze fixed on her. In those usually calm and undisturbed eyes, long-suppressed emotions surged, like an undercurrent in the deep sea that finally broke through the surface.
“Because it’s you.” His voice was low and husky, carrying a resolute determination, clearly reaching her ears. “I want to give it to you, I want to see the photos you took, I want… to fulfill that promise with you.”
He raised his hand, but without touching her, he gently brushed away a stray strand of hair from her forehead with his fingertips. The movement was careful and tender, carrying a sense of cherishing.
“Qiu Yayu,” he called her full name, pronouncing each word clearly and solemnly, “not because of what others said, but simply because… it’s you.”
It's just because it's you.
These five simple words, like the final key, completely unlocked the floodgates of all of Qiu Yayu's emotions. A bittersweet mix surged forth, bringing tears to her eyes. She had waited so long, approached so cautiously, and finally heard the answer she had longed to hear most.
Without further hesitation, she reached out, not to take the camera, but gently and firmly grasped the hand that had just brushed the stray hairs from her hair.
His fingers were slightly cool, while her palms were warm.
The moment their skin touched, they both felt as if a faint electric current had passed through them, and they trembled simultaneously.
Lü Xiaoyan grasped her hand in return, tightening her grip to completely envelop her slightly cool fingers in her warm palm. The touch was real and burning hot, dispelling all unease and speculation.
The red light of the darkroom cast a hazy, warm filter over them, as if even the dust floating in the air had stood still. They stood there, hand in hand, looking into each other's eyes, silently confirming the unspoken feelings they had long ago shared.
No need for grand confessions, no need for noisy witnesses. In this space filled only with red light, the smell of chemicals, and each other's breath, unrequited love finally became a two-way journey, a tangible and real connection.
Qiu Yayu finally couldn't hold back her tears, but her smile was incredibly radiant. She gripped his hand tightly, as if trying to transfer her warmth to him.
“Lü Xiaoyan,” she said, her voice nasal but full of joy, “Then we’ve agreed that it’s not just about making up for the missed exhibition, but also that we have many, many more promises to keep together.”
Looking at her tearful smile, Lü Xiaoyan's heart was filled with an unprecedented, overwhelming emotion. He raised his other hand and gently wiped away the tears from her cheeks with his fingertips, his movements clumsy yet tender.
“Yes,” he nodded, his gaze firm yet gentle, “It’s settled.”
Outside the window, the winter wind was still biting, but inside the dark room, it was warm as spring. After a period of cautious approach, unspoken understanding, and brief separation, two hearts finally came together tightly.
The story about autumn seems to have truly entered its warmest chapter at this moment.
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