Chapter 5 / Section 5: The Last Birthday Party
This was the last birthday she would spend with the boy. She wouldn't be by his side for the next birthday, and she hoped that he would remember her or... call her so that she could say a sincere "Happy Birthday" to him.
On this day, Mu Xinghe celebrated Jing Moran's last birthday. She invited Jing Moran to her home, where fruits and other items were neatly arranged.
The moment Jing Moran walked in, it was as if everything around her stood still.
"Mo Ran, you're here! I've been waiting for you for so long!" Mu Xinghe rushed over to Jing Mo Ran as soon as he saw her.
The 1.65-meter-tall Mu Xinghe seemed different from the one he had just met. In Jing Moran's eyes, Mu Xinghe would always be that innocent little girl who loved to wear a ponytail and a white princess dress, showing off in front of him. No matter what, Mu Xinghe couldn't live without Jing Moran.
"Mu Xinghe, first of all, I'm very touched that you celebrated my birthday with me, but this is also the last time we'll celebrate our birthdays together. I will never forget, nor dare I forget, all the little moments we shared. In the future, no matter who I fall in love with, please don't blame me..."
"Jing Moran, why are you so unwilling to wake up? You keep bringing up Xiong Yingguang no matter what you do. Is Xiong Yingguang really that good? She's your own sister. How can you disregard blood ties and still like her? You two are destined not to be together."
"Mu Xinghe, I've known you for ten years. I've known you since I was eight years old, but now ten years have passed in the blink of an eye. Why do you now seem to be so critical of the people around me who care about me?"
“I can’t stand that Xiong Yingguang likes you. She’s clearly related to you by blood and can never have you, but you always treat her with such importance.”
She knew, she always knew, that she wasn't good enough for Xiong Yingguang, the girl he loved. She couldn't be his substitute; his heart was full of her. Heart-wrenching words were already laid bare before her, yet she couldn't refuse them. She could only silently accept the cruelty that was never meant for her. The boy would never know how many tears she shed for him in secret, never.
When Mu's father came over, he saw Jing Mo Ran and went over to greet her, saying, "Mo Ran, you've grown up so much! The last time I saw you, you were still a little kid!"
"Are you Mu Xinghe's father?" Jing Mo Ran stared intently at Mu Xinghe's father and asked.
"Have you forgotten? He's your father Jing Tongyu's good friend."
"Heh...heh...is Jing Tongyu even my father? I wish I had never been his son. My body is filled with filthy blood. A man like him doesn't deserve to be my father!"
"Mo Ran... please stop talking. Can't you just be happy? Today is your birthday, don't be so upset and angry," Mu Xinghe said.
Mu Xinghe wished this moment could last forever, even just a little bit, so he could stay with Jing Moran. Because once Jing Moran left, he didn't know when they would meet again.
The girl had secretly loved him, keeping in mind all his likes and dislikes behind his back. She was afraid that these likes and dislikes would make their relationship less pleasant when they were together.
Mu Xinghe cut a piece of birthday cake and handed it to Jing Moran. She smiled and said, "Happy birthday, Jing Moran. I'm so glad I could celebrate your birthday with you. I wish this moment could stay forever. Because of you, Jing Moran, I really like you. If it weren't for you, I think I would have been very sad after that fire, and I wouldn't even have had the courage to get out of the shadows."
Seeing Mu Xinghe's eyes brimming with tears but unable to cry, Jing Mo Ran took a tissue and wiped away the tears that hadn't yet fallen.
"You shouldn't cry so easily. I'm not by your side, so who will wipe away your tears when you cry? You must be strong. The most important thing in life is not to be timid or cowardly."
Jing Mo Ran took the birthday cake into his hands, and with his other hand, he used a fork to eat bite after bite. He knew that no matter how reluctant he was to part with Mu Xing He, he couldn't keep her. As long as tonight passed, he would go to find Xiong Ying Guang, carrying these memories with him. Even though Xiong Ying Guang was his blood-related sibling, he was determined to find her; he couldn't abandon Xiong Ying Guang.
After that day, when Mu Xinghe woke up, all she remembered was Jing Moran getting her drunk. Although she was seventeen or eighteen years old that year, Jing Moran got her drunk while he was with her so that he could easily get away from the situation. When she woke up, she never saw Jing Moran by her side again.
She only saw a piece of uneaten cake left on the table, covered with something, and a piece of paper on the box. Looking at the densely written words on the paper, Mu Xinghe instantly burst into tears.
"Mu Xinghe, perhaps it's good to have you by my side, but compared to that, I can't bear to lose my Xiong Yingguang. Forget me, I don't belong to you, and I could never climb the social ladder to become a princess's consort. Every inch of my skin is incompatible with you; I can't feel the pain of touch. I'm already unworthy of you, a healthy person. Find someone who loves you more than I do and spend the rest of your life with them! Next time we meet, don't say you know me, just let us pass each other by..."
Unable to continue reading, Mu Xinghe lost control of her emotions, tears streaming down her face. The heart-wrenching pain could no longer conceal her youthful and impetuous affection for Jing Mozhan. How she hated herself! No matter how hard she tried, she could never win Jing Mozhan's heart. Her helplessness disgusted even herself.
They used to be best friends. But Xiong Yingguang's appearance created a huge obstacle for Mu Xinghe. The only thing she couldn't understand was why it was always Xiong Yingguang. If Xiong Yingguang hadn't appeared, Jing Moran wouldn't have stabbed herself and gone to the hospital. If it weren't for Xiong Yingguang, Jing Moran wouldn't have disliked her.
As she collapsed to the ground, sobbing like a child, she realized she had reached the end of her fantasy. She had desperately tried to close the distance between them, but the appearance of Xiong Yingguang had made them drift apart.
"Jing Moran, you'll never understand that my love for you is deeply rooted, and I can't leave you anymore. Xiong Yingguang is clearly your sister, so why do you keep turning back to love her? Am I not worthy of your love?" Mu Xinghe's eyes kept overflowing with tears, one drop after another. Her pain was excruciating, triggering unbearable agony in every part of her body, a pain that spread from her heart to her entire being, which she could no longer suppress.
The boy always pretended not to see her efforts, letting her follow him around like a fool. She knew he wouldn't love her; he only cared about Xiong Yingguang. Her heart was already shattered into pieces that could never be pieced back together. The boy clearly knew she couldn't live without him, yet she just ignored her love.
She suddenly realized that she was now very far removed from the boy she once was. No matter how much she tried, he couldn't move her. He always pretended to be a good person and told her to be brave and not to cry. Could he spare her a little of the kindness he showed Xiong Yingguang, even just a little bit would be enough?
Did the boy hear that? That was the sound of her heart breaking, like a glass shattering in an instant, never to be mended. It was the boy's choice, and she should respect it, but why did she feel that even respecting the boy was cruel to herself…
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