Chapter 19 The Vow (including a short skit): About forgetting to confess during the proposal...
The plains of Gaoyang in Chang'an County were desolate and lifeless. The withered, dark grass stalks writhed in the cold November wind. Occasionally, a few hawks would swoop down from the sky, locked in a fierce battle with a lone wild dog. The swirling yellow sand pushed the paper money from a recent funeral into the air before it suddenly plummeted down, rolling rapidly.
Changsun Qingjing is planning a farewell. A farewell between the living and the dead, a farewell between a daughter and her father, a farewell between the future and the past.
Her fingers touched the layers of dust on the tombstone; the roughness stung her fingertips, and the coldness seeped into her bones. A numbness quickly spread throughout her body, taking root in her limbs, trying to nail her to Longshou Plain.
She breathed on her palms, stamped her feet, and prepared to kneel down and talk to her father properly.
"Lady Changsun, are you safe and well?"
Her heart was suddenly scalded. She turned around, and sure enough, it was Li Shimin.
If there are too many coincidences, will they become destiny?
"Young Master Li, how have you been?" She turned her head away, not wanting him to see her thin and helpless appearance, curled up in her black linen clothes.
Li Shimin stepped forward, took off his cloak and draped it over her: "Your mother, uncle and aunt, maternal grandmother and uncle's family are all worried about you. Wuji went to the Nanshan area to search for you. Don't be silly... come home with me."
Changsun Qingjing shook his head. "I'll sit with Father for a while, but I won't be able to come again."
Her expression, demeanor, and speech were inexplicably strange. Li Shimin had initially guessed that she would become as frightened as a bird startled by the mere twang of a bow after such a change in her life, but he never expected that she would remain so calm.
He felt that it was understandable that she had fallen from grace within a month, becoming emotionally and physically exhausted and somewhat moody.
"Okay, then I'll wait for you."
Li Shimin bowed respectfully to Changsun Sheng's tombstone, unsure of what to say, and took a few steps back. His heart was heavy with unspoken thoughts, overwhelmed by the gloomy young girl before him and her father's tombstone.
He had secretly appeared before her as a savior. Now, in Changsun Qingjing's eyes, he was probably a joke.
At first, he thought he could rush to Lizheng Lane to reunite with her as soon as he was granted freedom by Yang Guang; after failing to do so, he tried to use Wang Wude's network of information with the young scoundrels of Chang'an to find out the new residence of Gao Shilian's family; after learning that she had been taken away by her uncle, he shamelessly visited Changsun Chang as the brother-in-law of Changsun Xiaozheng.
He felt he was unconventional and shocking enough. Such a bold and outrageous act should have been enough to bring tears to Changsun Qingjing's eyes.
All of this made Li Shimin hesitant to utter foolish words like "I'm willing to go through fire and water for her."
“I tried looking for you three times,” he asked tentatively. “You could have left me a few words. If the Gao family is in a hurry, I would never have avoided them. Why are you being so formal? And why are you running around like this?”
“My uncle was absolutely right.” Qingjing smiled, perhaps praising the person in front of him, or perhaps telling his father in the afterlife, “He said that if you are determined to find us, you will search every inch of Daxing to find us. If you can’t find us, it’s either because you’re deliberately avoiding us and we’re no longer worth getting to know; or you’re too stupid and we have no intention of dragging you down.”
Li Shimin's thoughts were stirred up by Changsun Qingjing's words, becoming a wisp of smoke, chaotic and incomprehensible.
Changsun Qingjing wrapped her cloak tighter around herself; the fox fur still held a lingering warmth. Recalling the tenderness of their farewell and the bonds forged through their correspondence, it all felt like a distant memory. But now she needed to eradicate those illusory feelings from her mind; there was only one urgent matter at hand.
"My uncle is in distress, and I will not abandon him." Changsun Qingjing's voice was soft, yet firm and unyielding. A powerful force struck a soft spot in Li Shimin's heart. The unfamiliar yet familiar figure in his memory overlapped with the girl before him.
His previous scolding and anger seemed insignificant. He swallowed the words "What can you do?" that were almost on his lips, preparing to hear her explain why she had gone to his father's grave. But he was also afraid of hearing her reveal a plan that would catch him off guard.
Changsun Qingjing glanced at the tombstone and said calmly, “I have two fathers, the one who gave me life and the one who raised me. I once thought that I would be a virtuous woman to honor my birth father, and a dutiful daughter to serve my adoptive father. That would have been enough for me. But alas, fate has been cruel, and I have to make a choice. I originally wanted to heed my uncle's advice and stay at my uncle's house to wait for the Husi Zheng case to be resolved, and then continue living as the orphaned daughter of the Right Valiant Guard General. But I found that I could not do it. You also think I am a burden who only causes trouble for everyone, right?”
Li Shimin vehemently denied it: "No. Your fortitude and decisiveness are admirable."
Changsun Qingjing rubbed his hands together, and asked with a touch of whimsical enthusiasm, "Young Master, if I travel far away, can you take care of my elder brother?"
Upon hearing this, Li Shimin was stunned: "Why would you have such a strange idea?"
She lowered her head, fiddling with the belt buckle. "My uncle will be heading to Jiaozhi soon, and I'm sure you already know that, sir."
“I know. I knew the day I returned to Daxing with the imperial entourage. I spent a whole day traveling back and forth between Chang'an County and Daxing County like a headless fly, just to find you and Wuji.”
"I'm sorry." Her voice trailed off, weak and desperate like that of a drowning person. The girl who used to laugh and joke with him in the mountain breeze, scream at the sun halo, and add pepper to his tea, as cunning and lively as a civet cat, had been hammered by fate into a mouse forced to roam outside during the day.
She began timidly to explain this absurd decision: "Shortly after I sent my last letter, my uncle received the imperial edict of exile. The whole family was in a panic, but my uncle remained remarkably calm. The whole family originally intended to travel together, vowing never to abandon each other. However, my grandmother was quite old, and my uncle couldn't bear to take her with him. So, my uncle persuaded everyone to sell the large house and buy two smaller ones. One was for my aunt to take care of my grandmother, and the other was for Wuji to support my mother and for his future marriage..."
She wrung her hands together, as if that would give her strength. “My uncle, mother, brother, none of them want to hear what I have to say. I’d rather die poor, sick, or old with them than live with my relatives. They don’t want to hear me say I want to stay; they just think all their unilateral arrangements are for my own good.”
“I’m listening to you,” Li Shimin tried to comfort her in a gentle tone. “Your uncle’s concerns are not without merit. Once he leaves the capital, given your situation, I’m afraid your brother will not be able to protect you. It’s good that you understand the greater good, but isn’t it important to ensure that your adoptive father doesn’t betray your biological father’s trust and fulfill his righteous cause?”
“Ah, you’re right. So I’ve decided to accompany my uncle to Jiaozhi. In Daxing, I’m just a burden who causes me worry everywhere; in Zhuyuan, I can be a good daughter who takes care of my father…” She was immersed in her absurd and heartbreaking delusion.
"Is this why you entrusted me with taking care of your brother?"
"Mmm." The girl nodded emphatically, having the illusion that the person in front of her could understand him.
“I’ll go find them right away. My uncle has probably already told my maternal uncle about my escape, and I can’t let them worry. Young master, can you help me persuade my maternal uncle and brother? I can talk to my mother myself.” Amidst all the uncertainties, she was certain of this one thing: “My maternal uncle and brother both value you highly. If you can plead for me, my trip to Zhu Yuan will be secure…”
"No. I will not plead a single word for you regarding this matter you have planned." Li Shimin's face was ashen as he rejected her in an almost ruthless manner.
"Ah, you underestimate me just like them. At worst, I'll secretly follow my uncle all the way to Lingnan. Once I'm far enough away, he won't be able to chase me back." Although Changsun Qingjing's determination had a touch of naivety, Li Shimin was certain that this stubborn girl would probably really do what she said.
"Now that you've revealed your entire plan, don't blame me for warning all your relatives and friends to keep a close eye on you, confine you to your quarters, and take away all harmful items such as the bronze mirror and silver plate." He wasn't joking at all; he spoke hastily and angrily, and it was unclear who was more insane between the two of them.
"I respect your integrity and righteousness, yet you oppose me at every turn. Since we cannot see eye to eye, let us part ways here. Farewell!" Knowing this decision was absurd, she still had to try for herself.
“Wait a minute. The reason I’m unwilling to let you go to Lingnan is because I have a better way. You can keep in touch with your mother and brother, avoid being watched by the clan, and also put your uncle at ease.”
"I would like to hear the details."
"I'll take care of you..."
Changsun Qingjing frowned and said, "What are you saying? I don't understand. If it's a case of malicious neighbors bullying us, my brother will protect his family and children. There's no need for you to worry about it, young master. If you don't want to plead for me, then forget it. I'm leaving. I don't need your help!"
This presumptuous plan and meticulous self-disclosure, along with the tender affection the young girl longed for, while not necessarily inappropriate, did not reveal any genuine yearning or desire.
Changsun Qingjing was filled with suspicion, her face flushed with a rosy blush. She turned away, avoiding Li Shimin's gaze.
"Did Wuji ask you to take care of me? Or is it my uncle?"
“No, none of that. It was all my own idea. There was just a small accident, like a horse straying off course when its master wasn’t looking. I ran a little too far and then turned the horse around to get it back on track.” He spoke casually, showing no intention of revealing his longing and the pain of searching. He moved closer to Changsun Qingjing, took out Yu Shinan’s “The Ballad of a Young Swordsman” from his robes, and handed it to him: “Before I left for Luoyang, I promised you I would ask Secretary Yu for his calligraphy. Even if I fail to win your hand in marriage today, I will still keep my promise and give you this calligraphy.”
He gently placed the folded note on Changsun Qingjing's crossed forearms and earnestly said, "If you truly despise me, just say 'no.' I will never bother you again. I only wish that my wife finds a husband more worthy of her trust."
Changsun Qingjing clutched Yu Shinan's poem and said vaguely, "Young master, I am so afraid. Sometimes I am arrogant, thinking that I should be a star chasing the bright moon, shining brightly with the icy wheel; but now I am afraid that I am just a firefly that flashes by, and will eventually turn into rotten grass."
Two lost geese, riding the storm of fate, met unexpectedly.
“Look at me, I’m almost twenty, I’ve accomplished nothing, I have no title to inherit, no military merits to rely on, no official position, and my father is often suspected by the emperor. Am I a good match for you?” He was afraid that standing would make him seem superior and make her feel oppressed, so he simply squatted down in front of Changsun Qingjing.
This twisted logic of "matching" made her eyes red and swollen, and she laughed until she cried.
"Qingjing, I used to remember so many love poems from the Qi and Liang dynasties, but seeing you made me so happy that I forgot them all. I have nothing of value, I am penniless, am I worthy of your entrusting your life to?"
"He sounds more trustworthy than other pretentious and arrogant noblemen!" She responded to his burning love with the most straightforward praise.
Everything had settled. Changsun Qingjing lowered her head, carefully examining the sincere young man before her. She timidly reached out, her fingertips tracing the corner of his turban. "Is Luoyang boring? You don't look well. You must not have eaten or rested properly." She pouted and began to nitpick, showing no intention of going home immediately.
He recalled that frenzied and depressing night in Ziwei City, the banquet where demons danced wildly, the undying stars at dawn, the distant tolling of the bells at daybreak, and the people and events that had supported his safe return. A smile involuntarily crept onto his lips.
“I’m in good health and I’m very obedient to you. I’m not concerned with worldly affairs, I’m restraining my temper, and I’m just trying to eat more. Luoyang is prosperous, but I’m the only one who’s lonely. Daxing is different. The birds in the metropolis, the gentle breeze in Lizheng, the sun halo over Zhongnan Mountain, and the twilight over Longshou Plain are all lovely. You are too.” His words had a refreshing and warm quality that came from traversing mountains and seas.
Changsun Qingjing blushed, letting Li Shimin pour out his heart. His clumsy yet simple longing, his apt or inappropriate analogies, stirred her heart. A sliver of reason told her not to indulge in superficial love. But her restless emotions made her like a dove desperately devouring mulberries, unable to extricate herself from these sweet berries.
Her fingers, hovering in mid-air, trembled, wanting to retract, but inadvertently brushed against her burning forehead. The surging blood in the boy's brain burned through his skin, searing the knuckles of the girl's fingers.
In a moment of hesitation, Li Shimin grasped Changsun Qingjing's hand and carefully pressed it against his cheek.
A burst of unrestrained laughter, which he couldn't suppress even with all his might, echoed across the sky above Dragon Head Plain.
Changsun Qingjing withdrew his hand and asked somewhat flusteredly, "Were you being followed?"
extra
Tang State Mansion Small Theater (After Li Shimin tells his parents that he has a sweetheart)
Madam Dou (surprised): Which family's daughter did you meet in Luoyang?
Li Shimin (calmly): We didn't meet in Luoyang, we met in Daxing.
Madam Dou (turning to her husband): Shude, where did you put our wild kite when you were roasting Husi Zheng?
Li Yuan (puzzlingly): I don't know. He said he was going to meet up with friends, so I let him go.
Madam Dou (laughing angrily): Vidyah, you've been very busy lately, haven't you?
Li Shimin (kneeling to his parents): When I was young, did my father and mother arrange a marriage with the Changsun family?
Li Yuan (thinking): It seems there was such a verbal marriage agreement. It was probably at a grand banquet sometime during the Yuan Dynasty, when your uncle Daosheng introduced your eldest grandson brother to me and your mother. Your uncle said that your eldest grandson brother admired your mother's virtue and wisdom and intended to marry his daughter to your mother's son…
Lady Dou (smiling): Why does the Duke of Tang speak with such a sour tone? Isn't my son the Duke's son...?
Li Yuan (in his defense): Madam, please don't misunderstand. I was merely repeating what was said. The fact that the Changsun family values you so highly proves that the Tang State Mansion is a blessed place.
Lady Dou (smiling): How could the Duke forget that the Right Valiant Guard General also admires the Duke of Tang's elegant and unrestrained manner?
Li Yuan (laughs): I dare not forget, but that was just a polite formality, merely to fill space. I have that much self-awareness.
Dou: Making sarcastic remarks in front of her children is disrespectful to elders!
Li Shimin (thinking: I feel terrible seeing my parents being so lovey-dovey today): What happened next? Did you give that little girl a keepsake? Did her parents give me a keepsake?
Dou (puzzlingly): We were just talking about your uncle introducing our parents, and you're already asking if there are any tokens of love?
Li Yuan (certainly): We simply asked each other if our children's ages were compatible. The Changsun family does indeed have a young daughter who is around the same age as you, Xuanba, and Yuanji. That's all; no tokens were exchanged. To insist there was a marriage agreement wouldn't be entirely appropriate.
Lady Dou (with concern): Is it because you have a woman you love, but are afraid of breaking your previous engagement and causing gossip? That's why you're asking about this old matter. It's alright, neither our family nor the Changsun family has taken the jokes at the banquet to heart. Tell me whose daughter your sweetheart is, and if she's a good match, I'll find a matchmaker to arrange things.
Li Longyue (encouragingly): There's nothing to be ashamed of about marriage. Tell us so your parents can make the decision for you.
Li Shimin (hesitatingly): You probably have a misunderstanding about me. The sweetheart I'm talking about is the youngest daughter of the late Right General of the Valiant Guard!
Li Yuan, Lady Dou, and Li Longyue (surprised): What!
Li Yuan (confirming repeatedly): Are you sure it's Changsun Jisheng's youngest daughter?
Li Shimin (nodding): Confirmed, her brother is my good friend.
Li Yuan (pressing the question): Are they the brother and sister who were adopted by Gao Shilian, the official in charge of etiquette?
Li Shimin (dissatisfied): Father, you clearly know everything, yet you still ask me.
Li Yuan (continues to inquire): Is it Gao Shilian, who was implicated in the Husi Zheng case and demoted to a lower position?
Li Shimin (without much confidence): Yes.
Li Yuan (rubbing his temples): From the perspective of her father's uncles and aunts, she is a suitable wife for the Li family. I only have one worry on my mind…
Li Shimin (urgently): But even a verbal marriage agreement can't be reneged on so easily. My marriage agreement with her even has witnesses. If I just pretend to be deaf and dumb and don't fulfill the marriage agreement, how will I stand in the future? What if I later serve in the Three Guards, and the first thing my superiors and subordinates say about me is "that despicable person who broke his marriage agreement with the daughter of the Right Valiant Guard General"? Wouldn't that be worse than being slowly sliced to death?
Li Yuan (trying to interrupt his son's long-winded speech): The trouble I'm referring to is...
Madam Dou (scoldingly): What's wrong with you today? Can't you stop interrupting your father?
Li Shimin (looking at his father with concern, fearing he might refuse): She is truly a rare find…
Lady Dou, Li Longyue (overjoyed): Hahahaha! My lord (Aye) is terrified of Vidyaraja.
Li Shimin (awkwardly): I... well, she's just really good. (Serious face) I promise you, if the Gao family doesn't approve of me, I won't cry.
Li Yuan (smiling): Then I have no more worries. (To his wife) Lady Tang, what do you think of the matchmaker?
Madam Dou (deliberately feigning a sullen expression): You two, father and son, chatted for half a day without even asking my opinion, and casually decided on the marriage. Now you want me to find a matchmaker? How outrageous!
Li Longyue (in surprise): No way, Vitiha is still the same person who cries whenever he wants, just like when he was little? Mother, don't scare him, look how wronged he is.
Li Yuan (laughs): Vitiha, don't worry about your mother's pretense. The eldest grandson's father and uncle praised her as a wise and extraordinary woman, and she's secretly delighted! How could she refuse this marriage? She's already agreed to it from the very beginning.
Lady Dou (lightly tapping Li Yuan's forehead with her fan, tacitly agreeing): You're even more mischievous than your son! (Turning to Li Shimin) So, who should be the matchmaker...?
Li Shimin (firmly): I want Uncle Daosheng to propose marriage for me!
Li Yuan (in surprise): This is truly outrageous!
Dou (indifferently): Daosheng it is. I'll ask him to go to the Gao residence tomorrow. Anyway, he's unemployed at home. He's always been at odds with the emperor and admires the hermits in the mountains. Maybe he and Gao Shilian will hit it off. Your marriage will be a sure thing then.
Li Yuan: You two, mother and son, are really impatient.
Madam Dou: There's no time to lose. If such a beautiful piece of jade were to fall for a more powerful, handsome, and dashing young man, wouldn't we be filled with regret?
(The whole family laughs)
(Li Shimin bowed repeatedly to his parents, his heart filled with joy)
Madam Dou (jokingly): Since you've even chosen the matchmaker yourself, have you also decided on the wedding party?
Li Yuan (retorting): What's there to think about? It's just sending Jiancheng and Yuanji back to Daxing from Hedong.
Li Shimin (straightforwardly): I want Xiaogong, Daozong, and Daoxuan to accompany me to welcome my bride.
Li Longyue (mockingly): I'm just kidding, the matchmaker hasn't even delivered the marriage certificate yet. You're already thinking about the wedding.
Madam Dou (mockingly): The marriage certificate hasn't even been sent out yet, and you're already complaining about your own brother's drinking and your own brother's ugliness...
Li Shimin (defending): What?
Li Yuan (suddenly realizing): There's one more thing. Although Lady Changsun is an adopted daughter of the Gao family, she's still a daughter of the Changsun family. If we keep the marriage proposal a secret from her uncles, it might cause trouble later. Longyue, does Changsun Sheng have any living brothers?
Li Longyue (thinking): I still have a younger brother who is alive, named Changsun Chang, courtesy name Xiuming. He is Xiaozheng's cousin. Anyway, my mourning period is over, so I can just tell the Changsun family to take care of things.
Author's Note: This little interlude fills in the missing content between chapters 17 and 18. It doesn't actually affect reading the main chapters.
This is simply to showcase the funny and adorable Li family.
If you like it, please save and comment!
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