Chapter 19 That was a conditional love…
Chapter 19
The door wasn't closed properly, and the smart lock beeped, sounding an alarm.
Jiang Zhiyan went straight out of the house without saying a word.
He had just stepped out of the door when Fang Xinle emerged from the elevator pushing a stack of cardboard boxes, and the two passed each other by.
Fang Xinle came in, panting. "Is this enough? I could have come back earlier, but I thought you didn't eat much tonight, so I bought some bread. Do you want some to tide you over?"
She was carrying a black paper bag, and there was another similar bag on the doorway.
It was bought by Jiang Zhiyan.
Xia Zhiyu quickly lowered her eyelashes, deliberately avoiding the entrance hall, closed the door with red eyes, and forced a weak smile at Fang Xinle.
There's only one bakery around here, and Xia Zhiyu's favorite is their signature pound cake. It's sweet but not cloying, and has a wonderful milky aroma. It's a sinful treat to have as a late-night snack, but it brings her great joy.
Ever since she mentioned that she liked the cakes from this shop, Jiang Zhiyan often went out of his way to buy them for her, especially after they had a fight.
It carries the connotation of apology and atonement, as if a sweet cake could mask the bitterness.
Humans are not plants or trees; how can they be without feelings?
Jiang Zhiyan certainly loved her; he knew her preferences better than her parents did.
Being loved by Jiang Zhiyan comes at a price.
Jiang Zhiyan's love always weighed heavily on Xia Zhiyu like a mountain, crushing her spine and breaking her bones.
If she remained docile, she could enjoy Jiang Zhiyan's doting affection without restraint.
Pamper them like you would a kitten or puppy.
He helped Xia Zhiyu grow wings, but then cruelly broke them, forcing her to be bound to him.
Humans are contradictory, and Jiang Zhiyan is an outstanding example of this.
He loves her.
He remembered that she had a bad stomach, her favorite singers and the concerts she wanted to attend. He could work overtime for half a month in a row just to squeeze out five days to travel with her. He carefully preserved the seashells he picked up casually. This man who never bowed his head went out to socialize for her, and expensive gifts were constantly delivered to her.
No one could resist falling in love with Jiang Zhiyan, but Xia Zhiyu gradually began to hate him.
I hate that his eyes are always calm, peaceful, and aloof when we argue; I hate that he's always busy with work, traveling for two or three months at a time; I hate that our anniversary dinners are always cold; I hate that when he picks the roses I planted myself, he ruthlessly knocks off their thorns.
She resented that he was never honest with her about the past or the future, as if she were just a passerby in his life who could leave at any time.
She hated him for loving her, but she didn't love him enough. Even their repeated, heated arguments couldn't resolve the long-standing problem between them.
Love and hate are separated by a fine line; after peeling away the pungent surface of love, all that remains is a mess.
Even more tragically, she can still vividly recall the first time she met Jiang Zhiyan. The man wore a light-colored thin tie on his shirt, his Adam's apple bobbed slightly, and his gaze as he looked down at her was filled with intense interest, completely unrestrained.
Handsome and unrestrained, he exudes a captivating charm.
It felt like a vampire's sharp teeth had pierced her neck, and the bewitching toxins spread along her nerves, making her willingly follow in his footsteps.
That's not enough, not enough at all.
She became increasingly greedy.
Jiang Zhiyan cruelly and resolutely shattered her illusions.
He chose to go to the United States alone.
-
Locked in the study, Xia Xiaojiang seemed to sense the atmosphere of his parents' falling out. He scratched at the door with all his might, and the little fat cat, who was usually too lazy to make a sound, howled heart-wrenchingly for the first time.
Xia Xiaojiang had never meowed like this before, when he realized he was no longer a real male cat after recovering from the anesthesia for spaying/neutering.
The argument that only children get hurt when their parents argue also applies to families with pets.
Animals have a much more accurate intuition than humans, and kittens are especially perceptive. Xia Zhiyu and Jiang Zhiyan had argued so many times before, but Xia Xiaojiang had never been in such a miserable state.
It was as if it had foreseen that their future would not intersect, so it tried its best to keep them together.
As soon as Xia Zhiyu opened the door, Xia Xiaojiang jumped into Xia Zhiyu's arms like a startled rabbit, whimpering softly.
Its tail fur stood on end, its pupils were large and round, and its claws clung firmly to the juvenile fish. It looked timid and hesitant, trembling with tension and fear.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, baby," Xia Zhiyu said tenderly, gently stroking the cat's fur. Her voice choked with guilt. "Don't be afraid, it's alright now. It won't happen again."
It was as if she was comforting Xia Xiaojiang, but it was also as if she was comforting herself.
As she spoke, tears streamed down her face involuntarily. Xia Zhiyu squeezed her eyes shut, trying to force back the tears.
Xia Xiaojiang tilted his head back, his slightly cool nose brushing against her cheek, as if to soothe her.
Even a kitten that has only been raised for three years would feel sorry for her, but what about Jiang Zhiyan?
Besides attacking her with those sharp words and avoiding relationship issues, what else does he do?
Tears flowed even more freely, and Xia Zhiyu tightened her grip on the cat, trying to find warmth in Xia Xiaojiang.
"I only have you left, Xiao Jiang. It's just the two of us left at home."
Xia Xiaojiang stared blankly at her. The kitten knew nothing, so it could only lick her chin, its barbed tongue sharply brushing against her skin, causing a slight stinging sensation.
Suddenly, Xia Zhiyu felt as if she had touched something hard. Her heart skipped a beat, and she slowly moved her hand down Xia Xiaojiang's stomach, which he usually didn't let anyone touch.
Xia Xiaojiang's bladder was abnormally swollen.
Fear quickly grew in her heart. Xia Zhiyu stood up abruptly, holding the cat, and tears of despair fell densely onto the cat's fur.
The pet camera in the living room followed Xia Xiaojiang's figure, freezing on the scene of Xia Zhiyu hurriedly getting up while holding the cat.
The alarm information was sent to Jiang Zhiyan's mobile phone immediately.
-
Have you noticed the urinary clumps in your cat recently? This urinary retention symptom has probably been going on for two or three days.
That started from the first time she and Jiang Zhiyan argued at home. She never expected that her argument with Jiang Zhiyan would scare Xia Xiaojiang.
Xia Zhiyu's mood plummeted, and guilt surged within her. She shook her head in a disheveled state.
"It's not serious, and you were taken to the hospital in time. Go pay the bill first."
After saying that, he added, "Cats are very good at enduring pain. As the owner, you must frequently check their urine clumps and feces, especially since your cat's breed is known for having a sensitive stomach. You have to be responsible for keeping it."
Xia Zhiyu bit her lower lip and nodded, her throat choked and unable to make a sound, while glistening tears welled up in her eyes.
The doctor took Xia Xiaojiang to the treatment area, and Fang Xinle accompanied Xia Zhiyu to pay the fees. Just after they finished paying, Fang Xinle's phone rang like a death knell. Her unscrupulous boss had assigned her a task at the last minute.
"It's okay, I can manage on my own," Xia Zhiyu said proactively. "I'll take a taxi home after the IV drip is finished."
The boss was pressing him so hard that Fang Xinle had no choice but to rush over and work overtime.
Xia Zhiyu looked at Xia Xiaojiang lying there through the viewing window. The medication had an anesthetic effect, and it was sleeping soundly. The fur on its paws had been shaved off, and an IV needle was inserted into its leg, with clear liquid dripping in little by little.
Xia Zhiyu felt extremely pitiful, her heart filled with bitterness and sorrow, as if she had been soaked in bitter herbs.
"Hello, could you tell me which room the little fish is in? I'd like to come and see it."
A familiar male voice sounded from behind, and Xia Zhiyu stiffened, not even having the courage to turn around and look.
Who didn't have a close friend in their youth who knew their dreams, listened to their innermost thoughts, and stood firmly behind them from every angle?
Xia Zhiyu and Ren Yu are a couple who grew up together and are related by blood. After Xia Zhiyu's mother gave birth to her second child, she had to work and take care of the child, so Xia Zhiyu ate all three meals at Ren Yu's house.
The two got into the same high school. Ren Yu skipped class to go to the art studio, and Xia Zhiyu covered for him. When Ren Yu was dating, Xia Zhiyu kept watch for the teachers at the entrance of the playground.
Ren Yu has always been a very opinionated person since childhood, and she is also very smart. During high school, she made a lot of money by reselling Xia Zhiyu's homework and notes for all subjects during winter and summer vacations.
He was too stubborn and refused to expose Xia Zhiyu even after the teacher found out.
At the time, he was earning money to save for Xia Zhiyu's college tuition. Xia Zhiyu felt that her parents did not love her, so she planned to take out a college loan to pay for her studies and try to owe her parents as little as possible.
It's ridiculous, isn't it? But when she told Ren Yu about this sensitive and funny secret, all Ren Yu could do was try to earn money to pay for her tuition and living expenses.
The two were as close as siblings. Even though one went to university in Haicheng and the other in their hometown, the distance of a thousand kilometers did not make them grow apart.
But Jiang Zhiyan did it.
The cause of the matter was simple: after Teacher Xia Zhiyu committed suicide, Xia Zhiyu quickly became depressed. Ren Yu could understand her depression, but he could not understand why Xia Zhiyu's way of dealing with depression was to quickly fall into another trap.
Especially since it's a trap that looks beautiful on the outside but is actually rotten inside.
Men are unreliable to begin with, and rich and handsome men are even less reliable.
Ren Yu felt that Jiang Zhiyan was unreliable at the time, and not long after, Xia Zhiyu chose to go to Beicheng to find Jiang Zhiyan. Ren Yu and Xia Zhiyu even had a fight over this, so Xia Zhiyu rarely mentioned Jiang Zhiyan in front of Ren Yu afterward.
To be honest, Xia Zhiyu was like a pitiful sandwich sandwiched between her lover and her mother during that time.
But later on, Jiang Zhiyan did seem to treat Xia Zhiyu quite well, and Ren Yu gradually lowered her guard against him, even thinking that Jiang Zhiyan was a good match for Xia Zhiyu.
In the fall of 2024, he wanted to give Xia Zhiyu a birthday surprise, so he packed a big bag of local specialties that Xia Zhiyu loved to eat and rushed to Beicheng.
After he got off the plane, he called Xia Zhiyu more than a dozen times, but no one answered. Finally, a nurse from a top-tier hospital answered the phone.
The nurse politely told her that the patient was still unconscious and asked if she was a family member of the patient to come to the hospital to pay the bill; otherwise, she should help contact the patient's family.
The patient collapsed in the hospital corridor when he came to the hospital alone. Out of humanitarian spirit, the hospital provided basic assistance to the patient, but if surgery is to be performed, a liability waiver needs to be signed by a close relative or the patient himself.
Ren Yu immediately exploded. He flagged down a car and ran towards the hospital while calling Jiang Zhiyan, but Jiang Zhiyan's phone was switched off.
The first thing Xia Zhiyu said when she opened her eyes in the hospital was, "Don't call Zhiyan."
Why not call Jiang Zhiyan? Why?
Xia Xiaoyu is such a carefree person, yet she was forced to develop breast nodules. Her medical examination showed malnutrition, hypoglycemia, and anemia. How did he take care of Xia Zhiyu?
Ren Yu was so angry that she almost wanted to die.
What angered him even more was that Xia Zhiyu firmly disagreed with his contacting Jiang Zhiyan.
He was so anxious that he was sweating profusely, his incision was reopened, and his blood oxygen levels were plummeting, but he still wouldn't call Jiang Zhiyan.
When asked why, she only told him not to contact Jiang Zhiyan, saying that Jiang Zhiyan was busy with work in the United States, just like the heroine of some melodramatic drama, who in the end left nothing but self-pity.
What is his question?
So what if Jiang Zhiyan is on a business trip in the United States?
Even if Jiang Zhiyan were launched off Earth on a rocket, he would still give Jiang Zhiyan a good scolding. Why is Xia Zhiyu, who is always healthy and can eat three bowls of rice in one meal, but becomes half-dead as soon as she is by his side, as if her energy has been drained, and no one accompanies her to the hospital?
How much pain she must have been in when she collapsed in the hospital corridor.
But Xia Zhiyu wouldn't allow it.
Xia Zhiyu explained that she felt she was too dependent on Jiang Zhiyan, both in life and at work, and she wanted to break free from this state and regain her autonomy.
In Ren Yu's eyes, this was blatant sophistry to make excuses for men, and a desperate attempt to whitewash her husband Jiang Zhiyan.
If you feel it's not working out, break up. If you feel you're not in a good state, try to adjust it.
Why torture yourself like this because of a man?
If he hadn't come to Beicheng today, would Xia Zhiyu have planned to keep everything a secret from her?
Xia Zhiyu was lucky this time; she fainted alone in the hospital corridor.
Next time?
Next time, perhaps.
How could he feel at ease if he didn't ask Jiang Zhiyan for clarification?
Xia Zhiyu's reaction chilled him to the bone.
He treated Xia Zhiyu with complete sincerity, but Xia Zhiyu only hid from him, not even telling him about the serious problems she was experiencing with her feelings and health.
Does Xia Zhiyu still consider him family?
Ren Yu stood by the bed, looking at her with a very unfamiliar gaze.
Having known each other for so many years, Xia Zhiyu could tell what he was thinking at a glance.
Xia Zhiyu was completely overwhelmed by his gaze; the awkward smile on her face gradually faded, and her eyes reddened.
She tugged at Ren Yu's sleeve pleadingly, her body language and eyes conveying a plea for him to stay, tears welling in her eyes.
Ren Yu seemed to see Xia Zhiyu's future in her pleading eyes.
Like his mother who became pregnant out of wedlock, she left her hometown for a man, was abandoned after becoming pregnant, gave birth alone in a foreign land, and was still working in the factory fixing screws two days before giving birth.
Ren Yu was furious.
He couldn't understand Xia Zhiyu's thoughts just as he couldn't understand his own birth mother.
Immediately afterwards, Xia Zhiyu told him weakly that she wanted to quit her job as a lawyer and go back to her hometown to work in social media, because she didn't want Jiang Jing to look down on her because of her dependence on Jiang Zhiyan.
Upon hearing this, Ren Yu truly felt that Xia Zhiyu had become an idiot whose brain had been kicked by a donkey.
When she was about to come to Beicheng to find Jiang Zhiyan, Ren Yu advised her not to come. Now that she has finally made some progress in Beicheng, why should she give up her promising job for Jiang Zhiyan? It's simply incomprehensible.
He felt that Xia Zhiyu's decision to let him go downhill was the most foolish thing in the world.
Then Ren Yu said something she had regretted for a long time.
He said, "Do whatever you want. If you want to date Jiang Zhiyan, go ahead. If you want to quit your job, that's fine too. But don't tell me about these things anymore. I don't want to hear your childish, childish farce."
"To be honest, Xia Zhiyu, you're a coward. What else can you do besides escaping reality?"
After saying that, he left, leaving behind only a bag of local specialties.
Looking back now, Xia Zhiyu must have been very pitiful back then.
She poured out all her heart to him, revealing all the difficulties and hardships she faced. But instead of comforting her, he criticized and complained about her because of his limited understanding, leaving her caught in the middle between her friends and her lover.
Ren Yu only realized after encountering many setbacks in her later work and life that what is called life is not going uphill all the time, but a drop tower, where you may fall straight down at any moment and be smashed into a rotten watermelon.
It's okay to take the wrong path, as long as you're willing to turn back.
But what utterly absurd things did he say to Xia Zhiyu when she tried to turn back?
His behavior was essentially no different from Jiang Zhiyan's; both failed to respect Xia Zhiyu's autonomy as an independent individual and couldn't even do the most basic thing of respecting Xia Zhiyu's choices.
Xia Zhiyu must have had the worst luck in the world to have met such a troublesome person as him and Jiang Zhiyan.
"Is Ms. Xia Zhiyu here? Xia Xiaojiang has woken up. Please go to the window to get your injection."
The hospital's announcement was clearly audible.
Xia Zhiyu reflexively turned to look in Ren Yu's direction. The tall young man, who was now darker-skinned than two years ago, was stunned for a moment.
Then, he raised his hand, strode over, and slapped her on the head, just like he did when they were children, his tone mocking.
"Heh, did you put your dad on surveillance? How come I run into you at the pet hospital when I just arrived in Beicheng?"
"I'm mentally preparing myself so I can come over for dinner in a couple of days."
Before Xia Zhiyu could react, Ren Yu looked intently into her eyes and said:
"I shouldn't have said that to you back then. Looking back, what right did I have to put my own ideas above your choices? This kind of wishful thinking to be good to you is essentially arrogance."
"YuYu, I'm sorry, it's my fault, I shouldn't have said that to you."
As he spoke, his tone became a little nervous, "Can you forgive me? I'll treat you and Xiao Jiang to dinner, a big meal, whatever's expensive."
"And it's not for nothing, I brought cordyceps, gemstones, and agate. I practically splurged my entire year's income just to please you. So, can you give me a smile, my dear fish?"
It's always been like this. Every time Ren Yu makes her angry, he'll get her some little things to appease her—snacks, pretty stationery, clothes, dresses—none of them are very expensive.
But these were the best things Ren Yu could offer at the time.
It's the same as an apology.
Xia Zhiyu inappropriately thought of the luxury bags and jewelry Jiang Zhiyan had bought for her; the exorbitant prices made Jiang Zhiyan's perfunctory and careless attitude seem even more burdensome.
This is just a tactic used by the wealthy.
That amount of money might be unaffordable for her, but for Jiang Zhiyan, it was far too easy to buy back the time she wasted.
Why not spend a little money to win Xia Zhiyu's wholehearted love?
The contrast between the two situations makes her five years of dedication seem like wishful thinking.
Xia Zhiyu blinked slowly and blankly a few times, then turned her head to look at Ren Yu, her eyes gradually reddening.
"Fish! Fish, don't cry."
Ren Yu was so anxious that she even started speaking in her hometown dialect.
-----------------------
Author's note: With both childhood sweetheart and unexpected lover arriving, Jiang Lu is about to suffer a great deal!
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
