"Black-hearted"
Chapter Thirteen
Lan Feiyu and I each rode a donkey, with a small squad of palace guards, about six or seven people, trailing behind us.
Fortunately, they were all dressed as ordinary guards that I was familiar with, in leather armor and with large swords at their waists. None of them were the half-naked figures I saw at the palace last night. I guess that must have been Prince Asa's personal preference.
It's alright now that it's midsummer, but when the cold winter comes and the north wind howls, will we still not wear a top?
When I asked Lan Feiyu out of curiosity, she smiled and replied that although it rarely snows in Bozhou, it is still bitterly cold in winter. Every winter, the clinic is always extremely busy. In addition to the usual medical consultations and prescriptions, they also send people to build temporary shelters for beggars and homeless people in the city, and provide them with food and clothing until spring arrives.
Sometimes, they also have to collect the bodies of unfortunate men and women who have frozen to death on the streets and whose bodies are left unclaimed, and find a place to bury them.
Although it was an indirect answer to my question, the topic somehow shifted to Lan Feiyu's duties. I listened with even greater admiration, and when she talked about those beggars and vagrants, her expression was calm and showed no disgust whatsoever, which made me unable to help but praise her: "You are the same age as me, and you can already do so much. Before this, I rarely even left the city."
Despite feeling frustrated that I, a person of such usefulness, could only idly indulge in foolishness, I truly never considered how I could accomplish anything substantial.
I think I understand why Lan Feiyu insisted that Ami call her "Master"—that's her true identity.
Lan Feiyu listened and smiled slightly: "Xi'er, you are the same age as me, but you can already travel thousands of miles away, to see elephants. As for me, I have never even left Bozhou. You have no idea how envious I am of you."
"But that wasn't because of my own abilities," I sighed. "I was just very lucky, even though I grew up without a father..."
Realizing my slip of the tongue, I immediately shut my mouth. Lan Feiyu didn't say anything, but after a while she said again, "Last time you went to the palace in a hurry, but this time you can take a good look around. Our Bozhou City, although it is far from comparable to the capital, is still quite lively, isn't it?"
Since the master had spoken, I scanned my surroundings. The donkey was rather short and couldn't give people too much of a superior air. Since we didn't have any guards clearing the way, we were practically standing right in the middle of the crowd. People on the street only made way for us when the donkey's nose almost touched them.
The streets here are narrower than those in the capital, and the houses and shops are far less grand than those in the capital. However, the crowds of people coming and going are quite large. What I find even more novel is that there are quite a few people dressed in strange ways among the pedestrians. I can also see young men dressed like Prince Asahi. They wear very few ornaments. Some are fat and some are thin. Whether they are as strong as a mountain or as thin as paper, they are all shirtless. Lan Feiyu led me through a group of strong young men wrestling in public, seemingly oblivious to their presence.
I didn't have her self-control, and I couldn't stop my eyes from wandering. Helpless, I simply tilted my head back high, wishing I had a fan in my hand. I inexplicably thought of the story of "Zouma Zhangtai" (a euphemism for a prostitute), and felt a mix of emotions, especially after I passed by and heard a burst of unrestrained laughter behind me.
However, there are also some things that are truly eye-catching.
For example, young women. I often saw them in groups on the street, bustling together, many of them adorned with gold and silver, somewhat like the Grand Princess I had seen in the palace yesterday. However, their laughter and chatter were completely devoid of any unpleasantness. I couldn't help but look at them, wondering if my head and hands could move as freely as theirs while supporting all those heavy ornaments.
Lan Feiyu probably noticed my focus, and as we gradually left the crowd and headed towards the city gate, she asked, "Xi'er, are you perhaps interested in those headdresses?"
My face flushed slightly, but I decided to be honest: "Yes, it's very pretty. Uh, will you laugh at me? I'm a girl after all."
"Laughing at you?" Lan Feiyu raised her whip and lashed the donkey's rump. "Look at what you're saying, as if I'm not a girl."
“You’re not an ordinary girl,” I replied earnestly, mimicking her gesture by taking the whip made of hemp straw and gently scratching the donkey’s hindquarters. “I don’t think I am either. My mother taught me that the most important thing for a girl is chastity and quietness, but Aunt Xian is anything but quiet. I also asked my uncle, and he said that ‘chastity’ is a virtue that both men and women should uphold, and as for ‘quietness,’ you can be quiet if you like, or you can jump around like a monkey if you don’t.”
Lan Feiyu burst out laughing, and I laughed along with her.
After laughing and being quiet for a while, she said to me, "Xi'er is probably the most pampered at home, isn't she? You can see how nervous Prince Xinan was when he brought you to the clinic, giving you countless instructions."
Without thinking, I nodded, which earned me another silence from Lan Feiyu.
This silence was different from before. I could clearly feel the dark clouds approaching, the sky darkening and raining. I couldn't help but think to myself, "This is terrible. I've touched a sore spot again. She must have been the apple of her father's and brothers' eye, but now she's left all alone and has to rely on outsiders. I'm afraid she might even lose her chance at marriage."
I firmly believe that if finding a loving and caring husband is not easy, at the very least, one should find someone with whom one can grow tired of each other.
Prince Azalea first...
Uh, I'm overthinking things again. How should I comfort her now?
Is the question asking about Lan Feiyu's treatment at home in the past, or is it advising her that life is full of joys and sorrows, and that she should occasionally have a heart that sees through the illusions of the world?
But even after we left the city gates, my mouth was dry from thinking, and I still couldn't come up with a way that I was sure wouldn't hurt her. So we rode our donkeys side by side, leaving the cobblestone streets of the city and arriving at the dusty, muddy dirt roads in the suburbs.
The scenery also changed.
Here, mountains are everywhere, not high, nor continuous, each one seemingly arrogant, gazing at each other but never joining hands—a sight unlike anything seen in the capital.
The sun was shining brightly, and although I didn't have to walk, I still managed to break a sweat just from swaying back and forth on the donkey's back.
I reached out to wipe my sweat. Seeing this, Lan Feiyu bent down and pulled out two reed-woven veils from the backpack on the side of the donkey. She handed me one, and I took it and gathered the net all over the brim. I was sweating again. When I turned around, I found that she was looking me up and down with a smile.
Oh dear, it's getting even hotter, what should we do?
I didn't know where Lan Feiyu was taking me. After leaving the city gate, we walked for about half an hour. The road became narrower and narrower until finally only a faint trace remained in the dense grass.
After turning two small hills, a breathtaking view suddenly opened up before me. Without needing Lan Feiyu's reminder, I abruptly stopped the donkey, stared wide-eyed at the endless field of flowers before me, and held my breath.
We hadn't reached the end of the road, but there was still a delightful glimmer of hope. I stood there stunned for a long time before finally exclaiming, "My God! How beautiful!"
Lan Feiyu smiled and nodded at me: "I saw how much you liked those flowers, so I figured you would like this place too."
Yes, this flower field is filled with the nameless flowers that Lan Feiyu gave me twice. They are as tall as my waist, shaped like poppies, but in various colors. At a glance, I can distinguish four or five different colors such as pink, fiery red, and light purple. This colorful expanse is overwhelming. Looking at it, I really wish I could just immerse myself in this sea of flowers, or build a small house to admire the flowers by day and watch the moon by night.
That is infinitely more pleasant than Mr. Wu Liu's "picking chrysanthemums by the eastern fence".
But after leisurely strolling among the flowers for a while, I noticed something. To confirm it, I decided to be the villain who picked flowers, pinched off a pink and tender blossom, brought it to my nose and smelled it, and asked Lan Feiyu, "This flower is so strange, why doesn't it have any scent at all?"
It's not that it doesn't exist. But it's definitely not floral. Its smell... if I had to describe it, it's more like the smell of bedding after it's been exposed to the sun. Of course, you could barely call it "fragrant."
Lan Feiyu also picked another flower and twirled it, saying, "I don't know either. I've never seen a fragrant 'black-hearted' flower before. Maybe it's too beautiful, so God took away its fragrance."
I was taken aback and stammered, "Wait, what's this flower called?"
"Heartless." Lan Feiyu gave me an unequivocal answer.
"Why?" I jumped off the donkey, handed her the flower, and raised my voice to complain for the beautiful flower, "This name is not only unpleasant, but it also seems to have a malicious intent."
Lan Feiyu took the flowers, but instead of answering directly, she said to me, "Xi'er, the sun is too strong here. Don't let your beautiful little girl get sunburned like me... There's a river ahead with two or three big trees that can provide shade. Shall we go there to talk?"
I nodded and climbed back onto the donkey's back. I couldn't help but look back at the guards not far away and asked with some concern, "They've been following us all the way without any water. Should we keep going?"
Lan Feiyu smiled gently at me: "Isn't this just about going to the river?"
Only then did I understand her intention, and I felt even more pleased with her. I couldn't help but forget the old saying "don't smile with your teeth showing" and gave her a smile no smaller than the "black-hearted" flower.
Fortunately, the river wasn't far from us. In the time it takes to drink half a cup of tea, I first heard the rushing water, cheered, and once again left the donkey aside, running to the riverbank.
The river wasn't deep, and I struggled to resist the urge to plunge in, washing my face instead.
Lan Feiyu and her guards also came over. She invited everyone to drink water and rest by the river, and then led me to a large, leafy tree not far from the riverbank.
We sat on the ground without any decorum. She held up the flower in her hand in front of me and her smile faded: "Xi'er, take a good look at the reason why this flower is called 'Black Heart'."
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