Chapter 62: How could a distinguished scholar in the imperial court have ever experienced such anxiety about gains and losses?
When the little girl handed over the hand warmer just now, Su Ying felt like it was a timely help. She put down the teacup, took it with both hands, and immediately felt the warmth flowing into her palms.
But Du Heng's answer made her stunned.
She couldn't help but look up, and met Du Heng's gaze. He was looking at her holding a hand warmer, her cheeks slightly pink, her lips rosy, and she looked much better than her slightly pale complexion just now.
He nodded at her reassuringly.
Su Ying quickly looked away. For some reason, she felt that the hand warmer was a little hot.
She quickly put down the hand warmer, but felt uneasy because her hands were empty, so she raised her hands again, picked up the teacup and brought it to her mouth, as if this could cover most of her face and block out the concerned gaze.
After a moment, she secretly looked at where Du Heng was sitting. At this time, Du Heng was no longer looking at her. Su Ying couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief.
A plate of three-colored tea cakes on the small table caught her eye. She had always loved these soft, glutinous treats. These tea cakes were made with glutinous rice pounded until fine and free of grains, and filled with sweet red bean paste. They were soft and delicious.
Su Ying thought it was good and ate another one.
After drinking some tea and listening to Wanyi tell many jokes, the new year had arrived before I knew it.
Everyone knelt down in front of the old lady and said auspicious wishes. The old lady enjoyed her family life and gave each of the younger generations a red envelope according to etiquette.
Because Su Ying was a guest, she did not go with everyone to pay homage to the Du ancestors, but stayed in the main hall waiting.
Wanyi, supporting the old lady, left first, followed by Cheng and Rong. Du Heng was the last to leave the main hall, as if he had deliberately fallen behind.
When he passed by Su Ying, he paused slightly and whispered, "Ying'er, the sacrifice is quite laborious. If you feel tired, go back and rest. Ask the girl to leave a message for Second Aunt."
This year is the first sacrifice after the end of mourning, and he knows that it will take longer than previous years.
Su Ying felt like a guest, so she was reserved and silent during the New Year's Eve. How could she have been as relaxed and comfortable as when she watched the fireworks in the side courtyard? She was obviously cold, but she never asked for anything.
Du Heng didn't want her to catch a cold from waiting for so long, so he left it to the last one and whispered some advice to her.
But he himself didn't even realize that the way he addressed her had unconsciously come to his mind.
Su Ying was about to pick up the teacup, but her fingers trembled and she almost dropped it.
What did Du Heng call her just now?
She looked up in disbelief, but he had already left the main room. Only a slender figure under the moonlight came into view.
In the end, Rong sent a maid to tell her that she didn't need to wait and could go back to the side courtyard first. Only then did she slowly leave.
Before she knew it, it was already the end of the New Year. It would take more than ten days or half a month to organize the library, so Rong advised her to have a good rest as there was still a long way to go.
It was already the third day of the Lunar New Year when Su Ying returned to the library. Pushing open the gate, she found the courtyard had been swept clean of snow, and the library was in perfect order. Su Ying couldn't help but praise Tao Xi, who was indeed very helpful and attentive.
Seeing Su Ying coming, Taoxi smiled and called her "cousin" and poured her tea.
After Taoxi's meticulous care, the library was no longer just a library, but more like a comfortable and elegant study. The side room to one side of the library was converted into a storage room and tea-making facility. If Su Ying stayed in the library for a long time, she didn't have to return to the side courtyard to get water or food, which was very convenient.
Su Ying sat down at the desk. Just as she picked up the teacup, she found a familiar booklet placed in the middle of the desk, as if it had been waiting for her for a long time.
She reached out and opened it in confusion, and found that it was the book in which she had "talked" with Wanyi before.
Su Ying thought to herself: Wanyi is right. We have been seeing each other every day these days. I could just hand the booklet to her directly. Why is it placed so mysteriously in the library?
She lowered her head and took a sip of the tea handed to her by Taoxi. The tea was rich, fresh and sweet. It seemed to be the same one she drank when staying up all night to celebrate the New Year.
She thought it was good, took another sip, and then slowly looked through Wanyi's new reply:
“Fireworks are bright but fleeting.
Do not chase after worldly praise, do not fear worldly criticism, only by keeping your original heart can you achieve longevity."
She was a little stunned. No one had ever understood her inner troubles so well.
"Wan Yi" comforted her and told her not to be discouraged because her opinions were different from the world's, and encouraged her to stick to her original heart.
She felt a surge of warmth at first, and the corners of her lips couldn't help but curl up slightly, but before her smile could fully unfold, her heart suddenly tightened, and she always felt that something was wrong.
She casually picked up the article Wanyi had recently left on her desk and then picked up the booklet to compare them. Their eyes met, and she was suddenly shocked. Although the handwriting on both sides was roughly the same, the strength of the strokes when it came to complex characters was clearly different.
She remembered that she had copied the comments in Wanyi's handwriting. Could it be that this handwriting was not from Wanyi?
While she was guessing, Taoxi brought another plate of three-color pastries, and Su Ying suddenly understood.
Taoxi was the little maid who came out of his study.
The three-color pastry was the only one he saw her eat extra while staying up all night to welcome the New Year.
The entire library was nominally managed by Su Ying, but in reality, it had long been under his control.
The booklet was quietly placed on the desk, waiting for her to look through it. Who else could do this except with his permission?
If it were Wanyi, she would have already come running over with a smile and asked, "Have you seen the book she put there? Why haven't you answered her yet?"
Recalling that day, she praised Wanyi for her attentiveness and even used a brand new booklet to write her comments, but Wanyi hesitated and didn't dare to respond.
It turned out that from the beginning to the end, the one who had been communicating with her through pen was not Wanyi, but him, Du Heng!
Su Ying slammed the book shut and pushed it to the farthest corner of her desk. Her face appeared calm, but her palms were sweating slightly. Her mind was in a mess, even her breathing was irregular.
What is Du Heng doing?
In the past, she could say that everything he did was unintentional.
But this time, it was obvious that he had a heart!
Du Heng sent Qingquan to deliver the book to Taoxi several days ago, but the book has not been returned yet.
He had always been methodical in his actions, rarely reconsidering them. But this time, he had a vague feeling that he was being a little too impatient.
Perhaps it would be more appropriate for him to give the book to Wanyi, and then have Wanyi pass it to her.
But it was too late.
For him, any poem or song he read could be memorized.
In the book, not only what he wrote, but also every word and sentence written by Su Ying had been engraved in his heart, and he could recite it silently with his eyes closed.
In the past few days, he read those words over and over in his mind and did not feel that there was anything wrong or missing. He thought that she might have discovered something and deliberately not replied.
But if not, why is there no response so far?
Could it be that she no longer wants to answer?
How could a distinguished scholar in the imperial court have ever experienced such anxiety about gains and losses?
My heart seemed to be gently pricked by someone, and I felt uneasy for several days.
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