Chapter 114 Chapter 114 A man who is both civil and military.
"Ma'am, nothing?"
Xie Zhiyan narrowed his eyes and asked with a sneer.
Sheng Puzhu only felt a chill running down her spine and her heart was beating rapidly. She simply couldn't stay calm like him.
Xie Zhiyan's eyes were dark, his rough fingertips still lingering on the earlobe that he had rubbed until it was hot. Then, his fingers slowly slid down and lifted her soft jaw with a little force.
"Puzhu, look at me."
"A lying girl will be punished."
"I don't understand what my husband is saying." Sheng Puzhu swallowed the saliva in her mouth involuntarily, and her throat slid slightly, revealing her uneasiness.
"It's okay if you don't understand. I can explain it more clearly." Xie Zhiyan's voice was a little low, and his hot breath brushed across the extremely sensitive skin behind her ear. He then lowered his head and bit the earlobe that was already red and almost bleeding with the tip of his sharp teeth.
He controlled his emotions well, but the movements between his lips and teeth carried a sense of punishment, as if a skilled hunter was setting a trap and had to leave a special mark on his prey.
Sheng Puzhu's face was red, but her fingertips were cold. She instinctively wanted to hide, but as soon as she moved, she was nailed to the couch by Xie Zhiyan's dark gaze and could not move.
Forced into a corner, she had no idea what she had said in such a hurry.
"I feel like my husband and my father are cut from the same cloth."
"In all of Chang'an City, there has never been a father and son who look more alike than you two."
Xie Zhiyan looked at Sheng Puzhu's panic-stricken eyes and smiled softly. His emotion was indistinguishable as he said, "Madam, you have excellent taste. In all of Chang'an, there's no father and son who are less alike than he and I."
"Similar, right?" Sheng Puzhu argued, staring at the handsome face in front of him that was at least 70% similar to Princess Shoukang.
Xie Zhiyan tilted his head slightly, his fingertips still not intending to let go of her poor jaw. Although the force was not strong, it carried an irresistible meaning: "I don't think it looks like her at all."
Sheng Puzhu gritted his teeth and smiled awkwardly but politely, not knowing what to say next as the topic had completely died down.
Xie Zhiyan found her anxious look quite amusing. He pressed his thumb against her slightly trembling lips and suddenly kissed her. After a full quarter of an hour, he panted and asked with a half-smile, "Are you worried that I might mistakenly think I'm not a descendant of the Xie family?"
Sheng Puzhu felt a stinging pain on her lips. She was stunned and suddenly grasped Xie Zhiyan's sleeve tightly. "My dear, have you known this for a long time?"
"Yeah." Xie Zhiyan lowered his eyes, his pupils without any emotion, so calm that it was unsettling.
Sheng Puzhu was in a conflicted mood. While he felt relieved, he couldn't help feeling anxious.
She was not sure about the impact of this incident on him, and whether Xie Zhiyan would think that he was the child of a saint. After all, that position above everyone else was hard to resist for anyone.
"What are you thinking about?" Xie Zhiyan glanced sideways, his gaze deepening. "Are you afraid that I might become desperate and kill that person?"
"Will you kill him?" Sheng Puju opened her lips, feeling that she should comfort him, but in the current atmosphere, her mind was in a mess and she really couldn't say anything nice. The biggest reason was that she was not very good at comforting people.
"Won't."
Xie Zhiyan added calmly, "But if my father wants to do this, as his son, I should hand him the knife."
"Madam, if you have any other questions, please feel free to ask."
Sheng Puzhu took a deep breath and hesitated, "When did you find out about the Saint's perverse and twisted brotherly love for Mother?"
Xie Zhiyan didn't look at her, but instead concentrated on pressing against her soft lips, rubbing them repeatedly, as if he wanted to be comforted in this way.
After a long moment, he stepped back slightly, resting his hand against Sheng Puzhu's forehead, and whispered, "When I was ten years old, but I was still young at that time. My mother, as the Empress Dowager's own daughter, was so proud and arrogant, Her Royal Highness the Princess."
"Everyone, including my father, kept it a secret from me." Xie Zhiyan laughed hoarsely, "At that time, I couldn't do anything, but that doesn't mean I can understand the elders' deliberate concealment."
Sheng Puzhu's heart trembled, and he stared at him blankly: "Ten years old?"
When she was thirteen, she still felt like a child, and no matter how precocious a ten-year-old boy was, how could he compare to the methods of an adult.
Xie Zhiyan seemed to have guessed what she was thinking, and the kiss he placed on her was bold and straightforward: "Since they all hope that I 'don't know', then of course I 'don't know'."
"It's just that I could no longer get close to the man on the Dragon Throne. Later, I left the palace and went to Yumen Pass. When I truly saw the desert, the snow-capped mountains, the endless grasslands, and the fighting and blood on the battlefield, it seemed that nothing was insurmountable."
Sheng Puzhu didn't know how to react for a moment. The man in front of her had a deep mind and an extremely forbearing temperament, which was far beyond her imagination.
"Does the young man doubt his own background?"
Xie Zhiyan buried his face in Sheng Puzhu's soft neck, hummed softly, and said nonchalantly, "When I was ten years old, I also had a period of secretly speculating."
Sheng Puzhu was still holding her breath when she heard Xie Zhiyan's tone rise slightly with a hint of amusement.
"But the thought didn't bother me for long."
"Do you know why?"
Sheng Puzhuwen's beautiful almond-shaped eyes were covered with a layer of mist, and she was puzzled. She felt sorry for him, but why did the other person's expression look like he deserved a beating?
Xie Zhiyan pursed his lips nonchalantly, looking more like he was savoring the previous kiss. Because he was holding her in his arms, there was a noticeable vibration in his chest when he spoke.
With a tone of confidence that was even arrogant, he casually said, "The descendants of the Xiao family have always been weak and frail, and most of them died young."
At this point, Xie Zhiyan narrowed his eyes slightly and glared at her: "How could the Xiao family's fragile bloodline raise a man like me who is strong and healthy, and skilled in both civil and military affairs?"
"I wouldn't even dare to dream of this."
Sheng Puzhu was stunned, shocked by his sudden and unpretentious boasting.
The heartache she had felt for him because of the enormous pressure he had been under since childhood suddenly choked in her chest. She didn't know whether she should scold him for being shameless or calm down and take a breath.
She blinked her long eyelashes, and the tight string in her heart inexplicably relaxed, so much so that she felt like laughing. Sheng Puzhu asked uncertainly, "So, my dear, you have never really been troubled by this speculation?"
Xie Zhiyan stared at her deeply and admitted frankly, "You can say that."
"Whether it's true or not, it doesn't make much difference to me. I'm the eldest grandson of the Xie family, and that will never change."
Sheng Puzhu raised her head and loosened her grip on his collar a little: "My dear, you should have told me earlier."
"Mother and Father were privately afraid that if you knew, you would..." She paused, swallowed the word "mad", and changed it to a euphemism, "it would be unbearable."
Seeing her confused look, Xie Zhiyan curled the corners of his thin lips and explained with a slight frown.
"They never mentioned a word to me, and when they did, they were always vague about my birth."
"To this day, rumors are still circulating in Chang'an, saying that I was born from a lover that my mother secretly kept outside."
Sheng Puzhu was so shocked that her rosy lips opened, revealing the pink tip of her tongue: "My mistress...?"
"Won't Father and Mother be angry?"
"Of course he's angry." Xie Zhiyan said jokingly, without a trace of sympathy. "Every time my father heard about it, he would secretly beat me up. But because the beatings were too brutal, it only confirmed the rumor that I was not his biological son."
"In my mother's words, it was like being mad out of shame."
For a moment, Sheng Puzhu didn't know who to feel sorry for.
Xie Zhiyan said in a low voice, "Back then, my mother got angry with my father a lot because of this."
"But these things happened before I was five years old. Afterwards, my mother retreated to Tianchang Monastery to practice seclusion, away from the hustle and bustle of Chang'an. The various speculations about my background and the elders in the various prefectures gradually forgot about them."
Sheng Puzhu was speechless. She subconsciously tightened her arms around Xie Zhiyan's waist, buried her burning cheeks in the crook of his neck, and murmured, "What the hell is going on?"
Xie Zhiyan felt his wife's dependence on him, and smiled with his phoenix eyes: "Puzhu, are you worried about me?"
"No." Sheng Puzhu was reluctant to admit it, as this would only encourage his arrogance.
Xie Zhiyan's eyes darkened, and he said in a hoarse voice, "You didn't before, but can you please feel sorry for me now?"
Sheng Puzhu felt her ears tingle and her heart trembled at the sensation of his breath. He was arrogant, but she had never seen a man more arrogant and confident than Xie Zhiyan.
"Then I will reluctantly feel sorry for you for a quarter of an hour."
The two of them were so close together that Sheng Puzhu felt a thin layer of sweat on her back. She suddenly remembered something from the past: "That...the child that my mother accidentally miscarried in the palace?"
"Is it because of that person?"
"Why do you think so?" Xie Zhiyan asked.
Sheng Puzhu took a deep breath: "Jealousy breeds hatred."
Xie Zhiyan was silent for a moment, his chin resting on the top of her soft hair, his voice low and steady: "I have thought before, maybe he mistakenly thought I was his child, so the birth was smooth."
"After a long and secret investigation, I also asked the imperial physician who diagnosed my mother's pulse. It turned out that her miscarriage was indeed an accident."
Xie Zhiyan pondered for a moment, then said, "At that time, the Saint had not yet ascended the throne, and was locked in a fierce struggle with Prince An's faction. The political situation was treacherous, and he himself was treading on thin ice, leaving him with no time to spare for other matters."
Sheng Puzhu listened to his emotionless words and nodded slightly: "So... do you hate him?"
As soon as she finished speaking, she clearly felt the muscles of the arm around her waist tense for a moment, and she could even catch a glimpse of the faintly protruding blue veins on the back of Xie Zhiyan's hand.
In the silence, Xie Zhiyan was looking at her, completely pressed against her soft body, and time seemed to stand still.
I don’t know how long it took, even the sky seemed to have darkened a lot, Xie Zhiyan slowly spoke, his voice suddenly became much deeper.
“I used to hate it.”
He admitted it bluntly, each word seeming to be squeezed out from between his teeth: "For a very long time, I couldn't let it go."
"What happened next?" Sheng Puzhu's eyelashes trembled.
"Later..." Xie Zhiyan's voice was filled with mockery. "Later, Jiulang passed away. I watched him act indifferent in front of others, yet grieving behind their backs without daring to let anyone know. Suddenly, I felt that perhaps he wasn't hateful, but rather... pathetic."
"Isn't it tragic for someone trapped at the pinnacle of power, unable to even protect their closest family members?"
"After that, that bit of hatred became dull and insipid, not even causing any emotional waves."
Sheng Puzhu was not surprised. Compared with the burning hatred, indifference and compassion were the most despairing barriers.
She reached out her hand and gently stroked Xie Zhiyan's slightly furrowed brows: "Then the prince must be very envious of my husband, right?"
"Yeah." Xie Zhiyan curled the corners of his mouth.
"When Jiulang was young, he often said he envied me. Every year on his birthday, his wish was to leave Chang'an and explore more distant lands. Later, he fell ill and narrowly escaped death. He no longer proposed leaving the city, but instead often wished to live a hundred years and become a wise ruler."
"What is your wish, Madam?" Xie Zhiyan asked.
"Does living to be a hundred years count?" Sheng Puzhu couldn't help but tilt her head back and kissed his Adam's apple proactively.
Xie Zhiyan tightened his grip on her waist and said, "This has already been accomplished. Let's move on to another one."
Sheng Puzhu thought for a long time: "Peace in the world?"
"This is my wish, madam, please change another one."
Sheng Puzhu was stared at by his scorching eyes, and her voice suddenly lowered: "After the mourning period is over, my dear, please give me a child."
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