Chapter 114 Envy
After unremitting efforts and various social negotiations, the company finally won its first formal business order!
Although the amount is not particularly large, it is of great significance.
To celebrate, Lin Yan waved his hand and invited everyone in the company out for a good meal.
As the "legitimate" boss lady, I was naturally taken away as well.
The atmosphere at the dinner table was very lively. There were only young people there, and after a few drinks, they quickly let loose.
We talked about work, life, ideals, and also complained about various strange experiences in the past.
A boy wearing black-framed glasses spoke first, talking about how he had encountered difficulties in finding a job before. He interviewed at many companies, but the positions were not related to his major. He felt frustrated and confused. Some companies had a serious overtime culture, which almost ruined his health.
Another girl with short hair continued the conversation, saying that she studied this major and originally had a dream of changing the world with technology. However, because of her gender, she was questioned in various ways, either implicitly or directly, during interviews, such as "Will it be too hard for a girl to do this job?", "Can you work overtime?", "Will you shift your focus to your family in the future?" She was rejected many times and almost lost hope.
Some people also complain about some so-called large companies, where the internal processes are lengthy and cumbersome, and there is a lot of buck-passing between departments. There are few people who actually work, and many people who slack off and pass the buck. The communication cost is extremely high, and the mental fatigue is far greater than the physical fatigue.
One young man even said that after graduation, he couldn't find a suitable job for a while, so he worked as a delivery driver for a while. It was tough under the weather, but he said, "Although it was tiring, I got paid for every order I took, which was solid! It was better than the intrigue in some offices!"
I listened quietly, feeling mixed emotions.
These confusions, struggles and injustices are not far away from me.
If I hadn't met Lin Yan, if he hadn't pulled me onto the path of postgraduate study and entrepreneurship, I would probably have become one of them after graduation, submitting countless resumes, facing similar choices and dilemmas, and stumbling in the torrent of reality.
Wang Qiang stood up at the right moment, raised his glass, and said in a loud voice: "Alright, alright! All the unhappy things in the past are over! We are gathered here today to celebrate! To celebrate that we have found a place where we can make full use of our value, to celebrate the opening of our company and taking the first step! Come, cheers to a better future!"
Everyone stood up excitedly and raised their glasses. I was also infected by the atmosphere and picked up the wine glass. Just as I was about to drink, Lin Yan next to me held my hand.
He looked at me with disapproval written in his eyes.
I shook my head at him and whispered, "Just a little. I'm happy today and I want to drink."
Lin Yan looked at my sparkling, pleading eyes, sighed helplessly, loosened his hand, and whispered, "Drink slowly, don't be stubborn."
The result is... I overestimated my alcohol tolerance, or rather, underestimated the power of alcohol when the mood strikes.
I hadn't been drunk in a long time, but I once again successfully got myself drunk and felt dizzy. My cheeks were hot and I could see double.
I find myself a little funny. The company obviously belongs to Lin Yan, and he and Wang Qiang are the biggest contributors. I am just a "family member", so why am I more excited and arrogant than them?
In the end, of course, Lin Yan half-carried and half-dragged me out of the restaurant and stuffed me into the car.
"Um...Lin Yan..." I slumped in the passenger seat, my head felt heavy and my stomach was a little churning, but my heart was filled with an unusual excitement and...desire to talk.
Lin Yan helped me fasten my seat belt. Seeing me like a drunk cat, he felt both distressed and amused. He flicked my forehead with his finger and said, "Don't drink so much in the future. Do you hear me? It's not good for your health."
I giggled foolishly, leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek, mumbling drunkenly, "My husband's company is opening... first order... I'm so happy..."
Lin Yan was amused by me and pinched my face: "Are you so happy now? When the company becomes bigger and goes public, won't you be so happy?"
"Lin Yan, you don't understand..." I leaned back in the chair, closed my eyes, and felt the neon lights outside the car window like a flowing galaxy.
"What don't you understand?" He started the car and drove smoothly into the traffic.
"I mean... because of meeting you, I seem to have... embarked on a completely different life trajectory."
My voice was a little hazy, but my mind was remarkably clear as I thought, "Listening to what they said today... I seemed to see... myself walking on a different path."
Lin Yan tightened his grip on the steering wheel slightly, turned his head to look at me, his eyes looking a little complicated in the dim car.
"If it were that timeline... I would probably be like them, complaining about work and life every day, feeling helpless, but having to continue fighting to survive..."
I continued to mutter to myself, as if analyzing myself in a parallel world.
"...But now it's this timeline, wife."
Lin Yan's voice was gentle and soothing, "Don't think about those 'what ifs'."
"No...Lin Yan, I mean,"
I tried to organize my words. The alcohol made my thoughts jump a little, but my emotions were exceptionally clear. "Life is really amazing, isn't it? One choice, one person, can completely change the direction."
"I think it's amazing, too." Lin Yan replied softly, his eyes fixed on the flashing taillights of the car in front of him. "In fact, sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I hadn't met you."
"I think...it shouldn't be too bad, right?"
I thought hard and thought, "You are so capable, have goals, and are proactive. You should be able to start a business and succeed."
"No, I don't think that's the case at all."
Lin Yan shook his head, his tone very serious. "To be honest, during my freshman year, I even felt a bit... inclined to turn evil. Because for a long time, deep down, I've been searching for a... deep emotional connection. I longed to establish that kind of unique, soul-deep connection with someone, but I couldn't find it."
I was stunned, and seemed to sober up a little. I turned my head to look at his profile as he concentrated on driving.
The light from the street lamp flickered on his face, outlining a firm yet slightly fragile outline.
"Can you understand?" He paused, his voice lowered, a hint of self-mockery in his voice. "It might sound pathetic, as if one can't live without the other. But that's just who I am. I need an 'anchor', a relationship where I can feel completely at ease and give without reservation."
“…Lin Yan.”
My heart felt sour and I called his name, but I didn't know what to say next.
"Before I met you, including the period immediately after I met you,"
He continued, as if analyzing his own heart, "I always habitually help others and am gentle and polite to everyone. Everyone is grateful to me and thinks I'm a 'good person.' But my heart is always empty. That's not what I want...the kind of deep emotion that can fill the emptiness inside."
He let out a soft breath. "Actually, I couldn't take my eyes off you back in my freshman dorm. You were always alone, staring at the computer screen, completely focused, oblivious to the gazes of those around you. Sometimes you could go an entire day without saying a word to anyone. That... sense of loneliness, a world of your own, was quite unique."
I was completely sober, and my heart felt like it was gently hit by something.
I never thought that in his eyes, I was like that at that time.
"I...I've always been like that." I whispered, feeling a little helpless.
"Yeah," he smiled. "You seem to be born without the need to deliberately maintain any relationships. Even in our dormitory, where everyone is so close, you are always the quietest one, with your own rhythm and world, enjoying yourself. That state... I envy you very much."
"...So actually," I digested the information in his words and murmured, "you envy me?"
"Well, maybe."
He generously admitted, "I am glamorous and surrounded by many people, and you are alone but rich in heart. At that time, I might have thought, this person is really interesting."
Just as I was stunned, trying to digest this sudden and profound emotional confession, the car slowly stopped downstairs of our house.
Lin Yan unbuckled his seat belt, leaned over, and gently kissed me on the lips.
This kiss was filled with tenderness, a subtle tremor, and a sense of cherishment.
After the kiss, he rested his forehead against mine, nuzzling against mine. His voice was low and pleasant, with a hint of pride: "But now it seems that I am more powerful. I have successfully transformed you and made you need me."
I looked into his smiling eyes, which were so close to me, and the love and satisfaction in them were almost overflowing.
The last bit of entanglement and emotion in my heart was instantly washed away by a huge warm current.
I reached out and hugged his neck tightly, buried my burning face in his shoulder, and called out muffledly, "Husband..."
Lin Yan chuckled, hugged me back, and patted my back gently with his big hands, like soothing a spoiled cat: "Okay, drunk cat. Let's go home."
The night wind is gentle and the stars are twinkling.
Chen Rui in another parallel universe may be struggling to make a living, but in this universe, I am being held tightly in the arms of the person I love most, walking towards our common home.
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