Dream of Death (XVI)
Zhongli's name means "Li". From the beginning of his life, he felt that he had not lived a good life. Now that it ended abruptly, he did not feel any regrets.
When he was a child, his father went to work far away, but he had an accident while away. When he returned home, all that was left was a box of ashes. However, he was young at that time and had no memory of it.
Later, his mother remarried another man to make a living, and he followed her to that home.
It can't be said that his stepfather abused him, but he was not in a good mood either. Who would welcome a burden?
Life was confusing and painful then, but he always had a glimmer of hope, imagining that when he grew up he would be able to leave this cage that made him feel suffocated.
When he was admitted to senior high school, he found that his previous sorrows seemed nothing. He never expected that the term "school violence", which he had found so unfamiliar before, would one day happen to him.
He doesn't even know what he did wrong. Is it because he is introverted and not good at speaking, or is it because he is not too bad at studying, or is it because he just doesn't like him?
From the chairs that kept disappearing for unknown reasons, the messy graffiti on the homework books, the mobbing after school, and the beatings for not paying the living expenses. And the constant ridicule, the encumbrance and the fatherless bastard.
During that period, every day and night was torture, and being alive became the most painful punishment.
But no one could help him. After resistance and struggle became futile, everyone's misunderstanding and indifference were just watching the fire from the other side of the river.
He thought about death late at night, but he didn't dare.
Until Lai Keqi reached out to him.
His grades dropped significantly during that period, so the teacher assigned them to study groups, and he and Lai Keqi were in the same group.
This is actually a very formal arrangement. It is impossible for the teacher to monitor what each student does in private. It all depends on the students themselves.
He didn't expect Lai Keqi would help him with his studies seriously and comfort him.
Gradually, their relationship became closer and they became friends.
It turned out that someone saw his pain.
They agreed to get into a good university together. As long as they persevere, the road to happiness is just ahead.
But things in this world are not always as we wish, and people who break their promises are expected to come.
Everything changed from the day she ran out of her homeroom teacher's office crying after school.
She no longer smiled and always looked dazed.
Zhongli always lacks initiative in dealing with people and things. He doesn't even dare to take the initiative towards girls he likes. Usually Lai Keqi takes the initiative to contact him.
That time he finally plucked up the courage to take the initiative, but Lai Keqi did not respond. However, he later learned the truth from the rumors that were spreading wildly in the class.
Zhongli felt angry and powerless. For the first time, he wished he could be like those little hooligans outside the school. He could take the opportunity when that bastard got off work, bring some people to put a sack on him and beat him up until he would never dare to bully Lai Keqi or any other girl again.
Later, Lai Keqi told him that she wanted to sue that bastard. Zhongli was really happy and admired her very much. She was fighting in her own way to seek justice for herself.
This also means that Lai Keqi will cheer up.
So he became more proactive during that period of time. He told Lai Keqi that he would support her, accompany her, and stay by her side to protect her.
It seemed that all his initiatives were given to Lai Keqi.
Lai Keqi cried for a long time, but he could see that she was also very happy.
Zhongli thought, no matter how much pain there is, it will eventually end.
Unfortunately, things never go as planned. The moment the court rejected Lai Keqi's request, things began to slide into an even worse abyss.
Lai Keqi became more and more depressed, her grades dropped even more, and she became thinner. Zhongli followed her several times and saw her looking up at tall buildings or standing in the middle of a busy road without moving.
She was looking forward to the coming of death.
Zhongli was scared. Lai Keqi was not only the courage and hope to move forward, but also...
He tried every way to comfort Lai Keqi, and even had countless fights with those in the class who laughed at her for being crazy.
He felt that he had changed a lot. When he fought with others, he would use the most despicable obscenities to attack others.
He also became an outlier in the class, but he didn't care.
He said to Lai Keqi, I will protect you, and we will leave this crappy school after we get into college.
Lai Keqi's reaction at that time was unknown. She just smiled bitterly and whispered softly, "But..."
At that time he didn't realize what was hidden behind that word, but now he understands.
But who can she ask for justice from? She has done nothing wrong, yet she has to suffer so much.
Why can that beast sleep soundly and have a happy family, while she has to endure everyone's cold eyes and ridicule and has to rely on drugs to fall asleep at night?
So everything became inevitable.
Lai Keqi's condition became worse and worse. After being rescued from suicide several times, she finally succeeded the last time.
On the afternoon when summer vacation started, when Zhongli saw the uploaded photos in the class group, he had a premonition that it was about to end.
Yes, it's coming to an end.
So he didn't even bother to confront those people who were pretending to be promising and trying to gain sympathy, and just ran towards the city center with his cell phone.
He made countless calls along the way, but only the last one was answered.
Zhongli's ominous premonition was like a giant hand gripping his neck, so that the only sound he managed to squeeze out of his throat was, "Please, please, I still have something to say to you..."
But after saying thank you, he could no longer hear any sound.
After that, Zhongli couldn't remember how he got here.
He just thought of a saying he heard from somewhere, that seven days after a person's death, his soul can return to the place of death.
So that night, he sat under the tall building where Lai Keqi fell, and waited and waited.
But he waited for nothing.
Disappointment and despair poured down from above his head, and the screen of his mobile phone illuminated his pale face.
The app that pushes popular news brought news reports about Lai Keqi’s suicide.
Only then did he realize that when he was trying desperately to save someone, there were so many people and so many voices pushing that person into the abyss of death.
The tears that had been shed on the first night now poured out and he hugged his knees and cried inconsolably.
Why, why can people be so bad?
Why, why did Lai Keqi have to die? She was such a good person and had never done anything bad?
Why can people who do bad things live with a clear conscience?
Why can he only sit here and cry helplessly?
Under the full moon hanging high in the sky, the girl in the red dress, covered in blood, sighed that the weather was so good and stood in front of him.
"You see, even the heavens are so cruel that they won't cry for the weak."
"Do you want to take revenge on them?"
"I want to drag everyone into hell."
The cat that was looking for its owner coming home from a distance let out a shrill cry, as if it had foreseen the outcome of the matter.
*
[(8.19-28) I dreamed of a deserted village last night, and when I woke up I found...]
(The police announced that the murderer was a genius hacker who used the software "Death Dream" to hypnotize the victims, causing them to have nightmares and psychologically suggestible things, so they brought the injuries they suffered in their dreams to their bodies. Why do I think this is ridiculous?)
(It's ridiculous in the first place. There's obviously supernatural power involved in this matter. The boy died of organ failure. It's obvious that he sacrificed himself to something to avenge the girl he liked.)
(Alas, some media dug up the previous incident. Someone saw the boy wandering around the department store where the girl jumped from the building for a long time.)
(Why do I feel so sad?)
(It was very sad. The girl wrote in her diary that they had agreed to go to a good university together, but it all ended up being ruined.)
(After a long time, someone appears to pull you out of your pain and illuminate your life. You agree to move forward together, but she breaks the promise.)
(I can’t hold it in)
(Although I think the boy has done this before, but...but...woohoo)
(You are all crying. Let me tell you one more thing. If a girl is called this, there is hope for the future. Look, there is no future to look forward to.)
(Fuck, devil)
(I think this is fate’s finishing blow)
(Time flies. This is already the seventh day since the death of those who died in the dream of death.)
(Is the host here to be sarcastic?)
(I dare not, after this incident, being cautious in what I say and do has become my motto)
(I have been watching the whole thing until today. I wanted to say something, but then I felt that the dead are the greatest. If I say something unpleasant, I will be no different from them.)
(All kidding aside, I really feel sorry for the loss of life and sad for the families of these people, but these people really deserve that word...)
(Ahem, it’s all my fault [run away])
(Alas, this incident feels very ironic. I can’t find a more appropriate word other than irony. It’s the sadness of human nature.)
(The most ironic thing is the two sentences left by the murderer. One sentence is that she was extremely disappointed with the world and didn’t even bother to take revenge.
Another sentence is what he wrote in his suicide note: I have a tragic life, a rough fate, and I have killed many people. Do you also want to sympathize with me?
(He definitely said this on purpose to get slapped in the face)
(I don't know what's wrong with this, but people's opinions and public opinions are particularly harsh on the victims. Take a sexual assault for example, people will definitely say that flies don't bite seamless eggs, or that she must have been wearing too revealing clothes.
I'll go up and slap these people in the face. You speak so meanly, you must really want to be beaten.)
(Pfft, I was amused by the host, but I also want to do this)
(Yes, yes, I get angry when I see these words)
(A very honest rapist, a loveless and introverted murderer, a robber and thief forced by life, a violent man with childhood trauma)
(Quack, quack, that's a great summary)
(You have to pay a price for what you do. You should be aware of this when you do it. It is undoubtedly ridiculous to rush to whitewash your sympathy.)
(The boy was also very clear about life. He knew what he was doing, but he chose this path anyway, so he killed someone, paid with his life, and was dismissive of this ironic sympathy.
Tell me, when will the mercy in this world be used in the right place?
(Alas, maybe God knows)
(I think after this incident, someone will think about what it means to be hurt by harsh words in June.)
(I hope so)
(The price of being a keyboard warrior is really heavy. How many people can learn from their mistakes? Do you know the pain unless the needle pricks your body?)
(If you don’t feel the pain, you don’t know who will feel the pain next time)
(This is a sad and terrible cycle)
(Alas... Is it so difficult to be a good person?)
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