Chapter 3 Chapter 3 Actually I am very bad.
Yang Shun, oh no, his current name on the household registration book and ID card should be Li Zhuo.
I still remember that in the first two weeks after he changed his name, when others called him Li Zhuo, he was always slow to respond and had no idea that they were calling him by that name.
Later, as time went by, the habit became natural, and when he was called Li Zhuo, he would subconsciously look up.
Time flies so fast. The day when I changed my name and got a new ID card seems like it was just yesterday. Li Zhuo can still clearly remember every detail of what happened that day.
It was a day with sunshine so bright that it was almost blinding. Early in the morning, his parents accompanied him to the office, and the three of them took a family photo on the way.
Under the photographer's direction, he was at a loss as to what to do in a custom-made suit for the first time and was surrounded by his biological parents. With a "click", the happy picture was frozen.
When returning home in the evening, Li Zhuo was drowsy sitting in the back seat of the car, clutching the newly taken photos tightly in his hands. Listening to his parents talking about the preparations for his birthday party in front of him, his heart was filled with unspeakable sweetness, and he wondered if he could really be so happy.
He muttered quietly in his heart:
So happy, so happy...
On the night the new ID arrived, Li Zhuo lay on the soft big bed, holding up the ID, and repeatedly rubbed the new name with his fingertips. He felt it once with his hand, recited it once in his mind, and then smiled happily on his face.
He thought that the past was all in the past, and he must forget about it and start a new life!
It’s a pity that Li Zhuo, who was lying on the bed and laughing foolishly at that time, would never have dreamed that the new life he had dreamed of would be shattered not long after.
Of course, one thing must be admitted. For example, in the first six months after returning to the Li family, Li Zhuo's parents were indeed full of guilt towards him.
They all wanted to make up for the love they had missed for more than ten years, buying him all kinds of expensive gifts that he had never heard of, eating with him every day, taking him out to play, taking him to various occasions to introduce him to everyone, etc.
But as we all know, any relationship has a shelf life. After the initial intense period of guilt passed, they naturally began to make corresponding demands on Li Zhuo and began to constantly find faults with him...
They say…
explain…
What did you say?
I can't remember it very clearly.
Li Zhuo's consciousness was like a tangled ball of wool, which he couldn't sort out no matter how hard he tried. Instead, it became more and more tangled.
Those densely packed black lines seemed to have life, constantly wriggling and flexibly circling up from Li Zhuo's ankles, wrapping him tightly, and they were scrambling to swallow Li Zhuo.
He just felt like he was about to suffocate.
"Don't be nervous, relax...yes, breathe slowly...breathe slowly, it's okay, it's okay..."
A gentle voice came from his ears, and the next second, Li Zhuo's unconsciously clenched hands were gently pried open one by one by the man beside him.
After noticing the red marks on the boy's palms where his fingernails had dug deep into his skin, the man paused and applied the medicine more carefully.
"If you don't want to think about it, then don't think about it..."
"Those aren't important things..."
As the warmth spread from the back of his hand to his arm, Li Zhuo found himself trembling non-stop. At some point, the man sitting opposite him came over to him and gently put his arm around his shoulders.
"Let's stop here for today, okay?"
“…”
Li Zhuo looked up blankly at the gentle man wearing thin-framed glasses next to him, then slowly turned his head to look at the surrounding environment.
This is a nicely decorated office with an elegant overall color scheme. There is a whole wall of bookcases, and a quick glance reveals a wide range of books inside.
There was a turned-off computer on the brand new wooden desk. He was sitting on the fabric sofa in the rest area with a rectangular coffee table in front of him. The cold air from the air conditioner stirred the green plants in the corner.
Li Zhuo was like an old computer. After booting up at the slowest speed, the desktop files had not yet been buffered. In the blank, he thought dully: Who am I, where am I, and what am I doing?
After a long while, Li Zhuo realized his situation. He was now in the school's psychological counseling room, sitting opposite the psychology teacher.
His eyes fell on the name tag on the man's chest:
——[Psychological counselor: Mo Liang]
"You don't look quite right right now. Let's just stop here for today, okay?"
Teacher Mo kindly repeated what he had just said, "Don't worry, students. We still have plenty of time. If you want to talk to me, you can find me anytime..."
Li Zhuo had no recollection of how he came to the psychological counseling room. His memory was in a state of confusion, and he couldn't even remember how he came to school today.
It seemed that I met Teacher Mo in the corridor on the way back to the classroom after lunch. He took the initiative to talk to me, saying that he looked very bad and asked if I was okay.
And then he came here in a daze? Under Teacher Mo's questioning, he inexplicably talked about a lot of things in the past?
He couldn't remember how long it had been since he had spoken so many words in one breath?
Forgot.
The chaotic memories of the past and the terrible situation in reality were like a ball of soaked wet cotton, stuffed tightly in his chest. He couldn't breathe, but he didn't know who to talk to or how to say it.
He himself didn't know why he suddenly became so close to a strange teacher. Was it because Teacher Mo's consultation room was so cozy?
Just like him, he is very tall but he doesn't give people a sense of oppression at all.
He has an elegant appearance, a pair of thin-framed glasses on his nose, and a gentle smile on his lips. It seems that every detail of his body is trying hard to tell Li Zhuo:
He is harmless and nothing can ever hurt him.
Teacher Mo's palms were warm, and his eyes were full of pity when he looked at Li Zhuo, as if he was a fragile item that needed to be well cared for.
It's easy to give Li Zhuo the impression that no matter what nonsense you say, he will listen patiently, and no matter what stupid things you do, he will understand.
Just, just...
Like a warm blanket?
Can you describe a person as a blanket? Li Zhuo, whose academic performance is average, doesn't know either.
*
"Come, drink some water."
Li Zhuo held the white porcelain water cup that Mo Liang handed over.
Perhaps his chaotic mind was not fully awake yet, and he caught a glimpse of the floor under the coffee table twisted into an unknown object out of the corner of his eye, and then returned to normal in the blink of an eye.
"What's wrong?"
Li Zhuo was sure he was dazzled. He restrained himself and took two sips of water to calm himself down. "Thank you, teacher. I feel much better now."
It feels really comfortable to talk, especially when the other person is a qualified listener.
Li Zhuo could clearly feel that the wet cotton ball on his chest seemed to have been wrung out some moisture, and the suffocating feeling of being unable to breathe suddenly eased a lot.
It was so relaxing, he suddenly wanted to say something again.
"Teacher Mo, you must have heard of me or seen my show, right? Of course..." Li Zhuo held the water cup in both hands, his eyelids drooping, his eyes focused on the edge of the cup. "Ever since I can remember, I've lived in the mountains. Teacher, you must not know how backward it is there..."
Mo Liang didn't say anything. He knew that Li Zhuo didn't need his answer at this moment. What he should do most is to shut up and listen carefully.
"I've read some comments from netizens, and they all think I must have hated it because I lived in a place like that before, but that's not the case..."
"At that time, I never thought about why I lived this way, because this was my life from the moment I could remember..."
"Everyone I knew lived this kind of life, so my thoughts about the future were the same as everyone else's. After graduating from junior high school, I went out to work and lived a muddled life... But suddenly one day, my life completely changed, and I realized that this wasn't the way I was supposed to be..."
"Actually, when I first came back, they were very nice to me. They really were very nice to me. They bought me a lot of gifts. I've never seen so many good things in my life..."
"Oh, teacher, you probably don't know, right? My skin used to be very dark. There are a lot of scars on my hands and face. They were caused by bumps when I was doing farm work. They're very rough..."
"Later, my mother often took me to a place where I would receive some kind of treatment every week. Every day, she would apply a lot of things I couldn't even name. Now I am completely different from before..."
“…”
"They were very nice to me. It's because I'm too stupid. I didn't meet their expectations and disappointed them. That's why they dislike me..."
I dislike his poor Mandarin with a local accent, his bad living habits, his slow personality that doesn't understand the implicit meaning, and his timid and subconsciously hunched back, etc...
Once, Li's father took Li Zhuo to a banquet. He was so nervous that he forgot the words he had prepared in advance. Under the gaze of everyone, he was so nervous that his face turned red. He stumbled for a long time and couldn't finish his words. He was like a country bumpkin who had never seen the world, which made him lose face.
Gradually, he rarely took Li Zhuo out.
Take Li Xuan out with you if you have anything.
Li Zhuo was certainly unwilling to give up, and he studied hard. But he was just a country boy after all, and with limited educational resources, he had fallen behind in many courses. How could he catch up in such a short time?
Not only that, he only learned the basics in a hurry and made one fool of himself after another, becoming Li Xuan's foil.
Oh, by the way, Li Xuan is Li Zhuo’s brother, not a blood relationship. He is an orphan adopted by Li Zhuo’s parents after he was lost.
The adopted son who replaced Li Zhuo had lived in the Li family for more than ten years. He was more like the real young master of the Li family than Li Zhuo, the legitimate biological son. The noble temperament in his every move was far beyond Li Zhuo's reach.
At the very least, Li Xuan is always at ease and talks freely no matter what occasion he attends, and he is never stage fright.
It's obvious who brings them more honor.
Li Zhuo no longer remembered the reason for his first quarrel with his parents, but soon there was a second, a third, and countless other quarrels.
Li's father and mother were disappointed with Li Zhuo's changes. They didn't understand what happened to him. He was so sensible and well-behaved when he first came home. How could he become so rebellious and disobedient? He became a powder keg that could explode just because of a little thing?
It was obvious that the school that Li Zhuo was sent to was the same international school as his eldest son's. Afraid that he would not be able to keep up with the progress, they hired a tutor and an etiquette teacher for him. Even when Li Zhuo said he wanted to learn piano, they specially hired the teacher who had taught their eldest son to give him one-on-one lessons.
What else are you not satisfied with?
They thought they had taught their eldest son the same way, so what was wrong? They were businessmen, and it was natural for them to prefer a more outstanding son.
But Li Zhuo also felt wronged.
Isn't it normal that his Mandarin is not standard? In Pingshan Village, who speaks Mandarin for no reason? Even the teachers in the village school can't speak Mandarin well.
The little he knew was mostly what he had memorized from what he heard people say on TV when he went to the village chief's house with a few other children to watch TV during the very little free time before Yang Duyan died.
——Of course, it wouldn’t be long before the village chief’s wife would come over to feel the warmth of the big butt behind the TV, and then curse them away.
Then there was the matter of how he learned the art of cooking from the customers who squatted in front of his stalls to buy his vegetables after Yang Duyan died. Sometimes, even when others laughed at him, he didn't know what they were laughing at.
But, but, if his parents are fine and he is fine, then who is the problem?
In fact, Li Zhuo himself didn't know.
So he looked towards his teacher, trying to get an answer to his doubts from the elder's eyes.
"Teacher, I don't understand... Did I do something wrong? Or have I really changed?"
"They took me home, sent me to school, gave me so much money every week, had a driver to pick me up and drop me off at school every day, someone cleaned my room and washed my clothes. All I had to do was spend money and have fun. I never dared to dream of such a life before, but why was I still not happy at all at that time?"
His voice became lower and lower.
"Is it because I have become insatiable and greedy that I am becoming less and less satisfied?"
Li Zhuo stared closely at Teacher Mo's expression, and the man's face showed that kind of distressed emotion again.
"Don't think like that. You've been treated unfairly, and it's normal to feel wronged and angry. This isn't your problem..." The man paused, his voice softening even more. "You're a good child."
Faced with such straightforward praise, Li Zhuo was stunned, and then he subconsciously retorted: "No, Teacher Mo, you don't know, I'm actually very bad..."
The pity on Mo Liang's face deepened a bit, and he continued, "How bad is it?"
Li Zhuo pursed his lips and spoke word by word: "I hate Li Xuan very much. He has done many bad things..."
The author has something to say:
----------------------
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
