Chapter 105 Past and Present
"……sorry."
Tuoba Sui's voice was soft, his warm breath falling on Bian Yi's back. Each word seemed to fall with extreme weight, but no one reached out to catch it, and they clattered to the ground.
"I left in a hurry back then because I received a letter from my elder sister. At that time, she had just become the Chanyu, and the situation in Northern Yan was unstable. She needed me. I thought it was only temporary, after all, I had never been raised as the crown prince since childhood, and I only had martial arts skills."
"I thought I would come back to find you soon. I wanted to continue my adventures with you, Fang Yanzhou, and Guan Yuenan."
"But my elder sister also said that Northern Yan needs a fortune teller."
"That's my only purpose."
Tuoba Sui's life can be explained in just a few words.
However, she was young and foolish, and thought that her mother's indulgence towards her was out of love. After all, after discovering her talent for martial arts, her mother always looked at her with eyes full of affection and granted her every request. She didn't even need to study as hard as her older sister. She said she wanted to travel the world, and her mother readily agreed.
But by the time she realized the guilt in her mother's eyes, she was already the Right Wise Prince Tuoba Sui, a demigod. Aside from herself, her elder sister, and her mother, everyone understood that the rest of her life would be forever burdened by the loss of lives, a torment of suffering.
She wasn't even free to die; the mere mention of the name "Northern Yan" was enough to prevent her from seeking death, leaving her only to wander aimlessly until the very end.
Thinking about it this way, her mother should feel guilty. But feeling guilty only towards her is nothing compared to feeling guilty towards the entire land of Northern Yan. It seems that it was only right for Tuoba Sui to be abandoned.
...
This is the explanation she has been waiting for for many years.
Bian Yi stared blankly ahead. Unexpectedly, just when she had long given up on this obsession, she suddenly received the answer she had been so persistently seeking in her youth.
If she had heard these words back then, she would have drawn her sword and fought Ah Sui without thinking twice. Then, when they were exhausted, they would have fallen on the grass, looked at each other, and smiled, which would have been considered forgiveness.
But now, her sword is broken.
"...How many years has it been since we last met, Ah Sui?" Bian Yi asked.
"I left in the 48th year of Zhenping, which is now 23 years ago."
Twenty-three years.
This is a very long time. If one doesn't live for love and hate, then this time is enough for everything to dissipate. So when Bian Yi heard Tuoba Sui's explanation and apology, her first reaction was bewilderment. She wasn't particularly happy, after all, this apology felt so distant from her.
She just felt… Bian Yi said softly.
"So it's okay...it doesn't matter anymore, I stopped blaming you a long time ago."
"And I understand why you stopped contacting us later, because I made the same choice, which made those two people look for me for many years."
"I was too naive back then."
"you……"
Tuoba Sui seemed to want to ask something more, but Bian Yi suddenly nodded and slumped to the side. Tuoba Sui quickly caught him and carefully laid him down. He checked Bian Yi's breathing and, confirming that he was asleep, finally felt relieved.
"Don't..."
Suddenly, the carriage seemed to have run over some rock, lurching violently. There was a rustling sound outside the curtain, and just as Lin Chengye began to scold, two figures tumbled in, piled on top of each other. Lin Chengye, crouching below, wasn't too badly disheveled, at most his hair was a bit messy, but Tuoba Heqing tumbled in headfirst.
Looking up, Tuoba Sui stood atop her head, bent down, and looked at her with a half-smile.
"aunt……"
Tuoba Heqing grinned, ready to crack jokes as usual. Instead, she was met with a fist the size of a sandbag thrown by Tuoba Sui, though he clearly held back; her head was definitely throbbing.
"Ouch, ouch, ouch! I'm just really curious. But Aunt, what did Doctor Bian mean by that...?"
Tuoba Heqing let out a mournful cry and shrank miserably into a corner. But even in this state, he stubbornly asked the question he wanted to ask.
"And you?"
Tuoba Sui ignored her, looking at Lin Chengye with a half-smile. His eyes seemed to say, "Why are you joining He Qing's nonsense?"
"I'm curious too."
Lin Chengye shrugged nonchalantly. However, being caught eavesdropping was still a bit embarrassing, so she coughed lightly.
"Now that your matter is resolved, how about... it's time for the important business I've come for?"
Tuoba Sui nodded and prepared to leave, only to find that Tuoba Heqing was also preparing to leave. She grabbed Tuoba Heqing by the back of the neck like a chick, threw him back into the corner of the carriage, and said.
"You're free from this now. Try eavesdropping again this time."
Tuoba Heqing stared wide-eyed in disbelief and protested.
"No, do you two have to talk to me in private...?"
Her response was to Tuoba Sui coldly closing the carriage curtain.
...
"I think you should know why I've come here when you see Bian Yi like this."
Lin Chengye opened his mouth, but if there were people around, they would wonder if he was mute and why he didn't make a sound.
Clearly, Tuoba Heqing had no credibility with Tuoba Sui, so the two chose to communicate using their internal energy.
"If you were here to ask for the Golden Double-Dove Poisonous Herb, this attitude is really not what you'd expect."
Tuoba Sui crossed one leg over the other, displaying a rather bold air. She seemed somewhat agitated, reaching for the sheepskin pouch at her waist and taking a few gulps. Immediately, a flush rose on her pale face. Tuoba Sui handed the sheepskin to Lin Chengye and asked...
"Want a drink or not?"
Normally, Lin Chengye would refuse when it required her to be mentally sharp, but the pent-up frustration of the past few days made her hesitate for a moment before accepting the task.
As soon as the lid was opened, the strong aroma of alcohol wafted out, making it hard to open his eyes. Since leaving Litao Prefecture, Lin Chengye had not drunk such strong liquor for a long time.
This wine has no name, yet it cannot be brewed in the Central Plains region of Southern Qi and Lai State, and even if someone tries to imitate it, they cannot achieve the same effect.
It seems that only the biting cold winds of the Northwest, the wolves of the grasslands, and the heroic blood of the Northern Yan people can truly capture the essence of this flavor, especially when it is served in a sheepskin bag.
Lin Chengye gulped down several mouthfuls without any politeness, as if venting his anger. The wine flowed down her neck and was blown into sparkling ice crystals by the cold wind.
She wiped a drop from the corner of her mouth, turned the wine bag upside down, raised an eyebrow at Tuoba Sui defiantly, and said.
"It's gone."
"Hahaha...Good! Good!"
Tuoba Sui suddenly burst into laughter. She patted her crossed legs and looked at the sky with great emotion. It was already dawn. Although the snow was heavy and the wind was strong, the sky over Northern Yan was still clearly high-altitude and azure.
“Bian Yi is no good. She loves to drink, but when she drinks, she talks nonsense. It’s what you always say: she can’t hold her liquor, and her behavior when drunk is even worse. Has she gotten any better now?”
Tuoba Sui's gaze softened instantly. Lin Chengye propped his head up, ready to listen openly to some of the past.
"It seems not, I've heard Chai Hu Nan mention it."
"Your name is Lin Chengye? You're seventeen?"
"Yes, she's already eighteen."
"Good age, good age..."
Tuoba Sui kept repeating these three words. For her, this was indeed the best time, and the only one of its kind. She had no expectations for the future.
"Excuse me, but I'd like to ask a question."
Lin Chengye paused, knowing that this question was extremely offensive.
But Lin Chengye felt confused about the matter of the fortune teller; she seemed unable to judge right and wrong based on her current experience.
She could see that this was the source of Bian Yi's pain. She couldn't forgive herself for what she had done, which was why she didn't cherish her body. Or perhaps Bian Yi was unconsciously heading towards death, and what was stopping her was only the rope of revenge for Qingluan Medicine Valley.
What if the rope suddenly disappears?
She didn't want to see this, and she... Lin Chengye unconsciously clenched his fists, biting his lips until they turned white.
But she couldn't bring herself to say "it's okay" to Bian Yi. How could she settle the mess between her and Qin Ruoliu? What about the people who died because of it?
But... Lin Chengye never considered herself a saint. Along the way, while Bian Yi slept, she slept peacefully. She repeatedly checked Bian Yi's breathing, and she finally realized that she had a little selfishness in this matter. It had nothing to do with right or wrong; she just wanted Bian Yi to continue living.
This was her last chance. If she could find a reason from Tuoba Sui to keep Bian Yi in the mortal realm, even if that reason was as clumsy as the one Bian Yi had used to hold her back, Lin Chengye composed himself and asked.
"How...did you become a demigod?"
"...The Northern Yan royal family has its own methods. Although not every generation of the royal family will produce a talented person, the Northern Yan has always kept a city within its borders."
"The people of that city are constantly being killed in order to create demigods. And their children will be raised by the Northern Yan, and the cycle will continue."
Tuoba Sui's face, which had just turned red from the strong liquor, suddenly turned pale, and an extremely painful expression appeared on his face.
“I had never known such a city existed before…”
Lin Chengye's face also turned pale. She was somewhat bewildered, as if no matter what, the Half-Immortal deserved to die.
"The Half-Immortal deserved to die, and I agree. If you saw the expressions on people's faces as they died one by one under your sword, you would understand what a great blessing death was for Bian Yi and me."
Tuoba Sui's words seemed to confirm Lin Chengye's thoughts. However, Tuoba Sui seemed to understand her expression and suddenly raised her hand and flicked Lin Chengye's forehead.
"If you want to keep her, use the word 'rude,' not some excuse. Use childish methods, relying solely on your own will. It's like... crying when you don't get candy. I don't know if you understand."
This is a game with very low odds of winning, like a gambler suddenly throwing away all his chips and shouting, "I'm going to lose my life!"
"I'll give it a try."
Lin Chengye gave a soft reply. She shook her head, not daring to think about it anymore, and brought the topic back.
"It's not that I have a bad attitude, it's just that it's unnecessary. First, it's because I'm not the only one seeking something from you; it should be a mutual exchange."
"A new semi-immortal has emerged in the Kingdom of Lai. Are you in Northern Yan aware of this? Originally, there were three semi-immortals in the Three Kingdoms, but now the balance has been broken. You should know better than me what this means."
"So...you mean you already have a way to kill her? And you want to make a deal with us to get the Golden Double-Dove Poisonous Herb."
When Tuoba Sui heard the words "new half-immortal," all her gentleness and tenderness vanished. In an instant, she bared her teeth like a wolf, and just sitting there, she exuded a fear that made people feel as if they were facing a wild beast.
"This is a win-win situation. I avenge the people of Litao Prefecture and the Lin family, while you and Nanqi continue to maintain the status quo with Lai Kingdom, and the world is at peace." Lin Chengye looked at her, his eyes calm.
"What you and my sister said... is almost exactly the same. How come she was right again? Talking to people as smart as you is really..."
Tuoba Sui suddenly irritably rubbed his white curly hair, crossed his arms angrily, and waved his hand.
"...Let's go, let's go straight to see my older sister."
"The current Chanyu of Northern Yan is Tuoba Lü."
Author's Note: Although I've never had a direct definition of beauty or ugliness, I still have to say that the Tuoba family is really, really handsome in my eyes!! [Kiss]
I'll update again tomorrow, making it three days in a row. It'll probably be finished soon [minus one].
Thank you so much for subscribing! I'm so grateful you've read this far. [Laughing and crying emoji]
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
