Chapter 147 It's the same without you
Fan Shuhui's life in the Taoist temple was actually quite good. The Dou family had never treated her badly, and the county lord no longer bothered her.
In fact, this also illustrates one thing. As long as Fan Shuhui stayed in the dojo honestly, no one would do anything to her. But if she was also aware of the current situation, so many things would not have happened.
Although she was in the Taoist temple, her heart was always wandering outside. She was even thinking of ways to get Dou Qiming to come to the temple to see her. Dou Qiming felt sorry for her because she grew up in luxury but now had to guard this huge Taoist temple for ten years, so he often came to visit her.
Then the two people looked at each other and saw the bed. Not long after, Fan Shuhui found out that she was pregnant. She was ecstatic and felt that with this child, she would definitely be able to return to the Dou family.
In fact, it was just as he wished. Fan Shuhui was taken back, and after being well fed and well cared for for a few months, she gave birth to a son. However, before Fan Shuhui even got to see the son, she was taken to the county lady's room, registered under her name, and became a legitimate young master.
Fan Shuhui couldn't even mention the child she gave birth to, because every time she made a fuss, the child and the county lord must be feeling unwell.
Fan Shuhui begged Dou Qiming to let her see the child, but Dou Qiming's words made her feel cold all over: "Shuhui, you only lost a child, but what about the county lady? If it weren't for us, she wouldn't have to marry me. With her status, is it difficult to find a good son-in-law from a high family?
If it weren't for us, she would have lived with you in harmony and love. You lost a child, but she lost her love! ”
Fan Shuhui's crying voice was stuck in her throat and she didn't know what to say.
She was stunned for a long time, and suddenly pushed Dou Qiming away: "You are not him, you are not Dou Qiming, he would not treat me like this, no."
After Fan Shuhui said this, she collapsed and never recovered.
Dou Qiming was confused by what she said, and with someone secretly instigating him, Dou Qiming thought that Fan Shuhui had someone in her heart, and suddenly he felt a sense of suffocation as if he was being cuckolded.
Coupled with Fan Shuhui's various behaviors, Dou Qiming completely turned cold towards Fan Shuhui.
When Fan Shuhui herself said that Dou Qiming was not Dou Qiming, she was actually referring to the current Dou Qiming, not the half-brother from Guaigun Hutong.
She said these words herself, but deep down she still held on to the hope that her husband would come to comfort her. Perhaps she also hoped to hear Dou Qiming tell her that she would still have a child and that he had her in his heart.
But no, the county lord turned around and gave him two beautiful concubines. Whenever Dou Qiming wanted to go see Fan Shuhui, she always found various reasons to stop him and prevent him from seeing Fan Shuhui.
But Fan Shuhui waited and waited, but her lover never came. Her physical pain became more and more serious. When she heard that Dou Qiming's other concubine was pregnant, she vomited a large mouthful of blood.
After lying in bed for two days, she chose to hang herself at night. However, her soul did not dissipate and kept wandering around the house. Fan Shuhui thought that by doing this she could make Dou Qiming suffer unbearable pain.
She thought she would see Dou Qiming holding her body and crying, with his hair turning white overnight, but that didn't happen. The news of Fan Shuhui's death did not reach Dou Qiming's ears immediately.
The county lady had her funeral handled. Considering that she had given birth to a child, she was buried in the proper manner with a seven-day funeral rite.
Dou Qiming only found out about this on the seventh day. He was really shocked at first and ran to the mourning hall to see Fan Shuhui in a panic.
But Fan Shuhui committed suicide by hanging herself, and her face looked scary. Moreover, her body had been kept for seven days without any ice to keep it cool. The strong incense smell in the mourning hall was mixed with a faint stench of corpse.
No matter how much affection Dou Qiming had for Fan Shuhui, he would have to discount his feelings for her after seeing her appearance. After all, he was not a lunatic and would not do something as crazy as holding on to a corpse until it stinked.
Dou Qiming only took one look at Fan Shuhui in the coffin. It was really just one look, and he had no desire to take a second look.
Afterwards, he burned incense for Fan Shuhui. After being depressed for a while, the county lord found two beauties who were somewhat similar to Fan Shuhui as concubines for him.
At first, Dou Qiming was a little sad about Fan Shuhui, but later, with the company of the beauty, he gradually let go of the depression in his heart.
In the first two years, on Fan Shuhui's death anniversary, Dou Qiming would go to her grave to pay tribute, but later on, Dou Qiming stopped going and only assigned a maid to burn paper and offer sacrifices.
After a few years, Dou Qiming forgot about the incident and no one in the mansion mentioned it. No one paid tribute to Fan Shuhui that year, and the weeds on the grave slowly grew taller and taller, until the next year they were taller than a person.
When Dou Qiming remembered it later, he just asked the old servant to remember to burn paper for Fan Shuhui.
Later, when the old servant grew old and had difficulty moving around, no one remembered Fan Shuhui anymore.
Her grave gradually became an isolated grave, and the child she gave birth to was unaware of the existence of his biological mother. Fan Shuhui was thus forgotten.
Except for the first two years when he felt a little sad, Dou Qiming completely forgot about Fan Shuhui afterwards. He was surrounded by his beautiful wife and concubines and many children at home.
Dou Qiming was in pain over Fan Shuhui's death, but that did not stop him from living his life happily after the sadness, and his life is getting more and more prosperous.
Fan Shuhui couldn't believe it. She felt that it shouldn't be like this. They were a young couple and had been so loving. She loved Dou Qiming so much, and Dou Qiming also loved her.
Why did it turn out like this? Why did Dou Qiming forget her?
How could Dou Qiming live his life with peace of mind? She was already dead. Couldn't her death leave even the slightest mark in Dou Qiming's heart?
It seems that in Dou Qiming's life, whether Fan Shuhui exists or not, he will live the same life and look forward the same way. The sun rises normally when the day breaks, and the moon comes out naturally when the night falls. One more Fan Shuhui in the world won't make much difference, and one less Fan Shuhui won't make much difference either. In fact, she is not that important to everyone.
What could be worse than Fan Shuhui discovering that she was so self-righteous about her deep love for Dou Qiming, and so self-righteously believed that Dou Qiming would grieve for her all his life, only to find out in the end that she was actually not that important, and she was just a small embellishment in Dou Qiming's life, and he was not as sad as you thought.
Fan Shuhui couldn't accept this result. She paid the price of her life, and this is the result? She couldn't accept it, she couldn't accept it!
But what if she can't accept it? In Dou Qiming's later life, he never mentioned Fan Shuhui again. Outsiders only knew that his wife was a county lady, but they didn't know that he had been married twice.
Maybe even he forgot that his first wife was his childhood sweetheart and cousin.
A hundred years after his death, the tablet placed next to his was the tablet of the county princess. Which one was Fan Shuhui? I'm sorry, I don't know. There's no name in the family tree, so who would know who she is?
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