How can I be happy?
Oh, if he died in front of him and fulfilled his wish, he would be happy, right?
But after that, he will forget him, will meet new people, and will put him behind him in his happy days!
Bing Nandong doesn't want this. He wants to leave something that the other person will never forget, such as... a kiss. He wants the other person to swallow his dark and twisted feelings that even he himself can't understand, and continue to live like carrying his ghost forever.
***
I saw him again. There are actually other crazy people like him in the world.
***
Bing Nandong thought about it for a few times and finally vaguely figured out what his abnormal feelings were. He liked Fan Zhiyi, but the other party would not like him.
***
When Bing Nandong met Fan Zhiyi again, he was fed up. He didn't know why the other party didn't get bored of this almost identical cycle.
Fan Zhiyi had confessed his feelings to him several times before, and Bing Nandong also vaguely figured out that this person must have some kind of handle held by the Heavenly Dao, which was why he had to resort to this method to get close to him.
He only had vague memories of the previous cycles, but they were mostly the same: he opened the ghost gate, was buried with the world, and fell into the cycle again.
How can this all end? Does he have to die? But how can he die?
Since Bing Nandong can't remember whether he has died in the past, let's wait for him to think about it.
It was rare for him to encounter something he couldn't figure out, partly about Fan Zhiyi as a person, partly about his feelings for Fan Zhiyi, and partly about how to end it all for Fan Zhiyi.
Or maybe he should let Fan Zhiyi stay with him. It would be worth it to endure the backlash of the ghost energy for him. They tortured each other like this, at least they could still see each other.
…
If there was a way to go back to the time before everything began, Fan Zhiyi would be soft-hearted and let him see the misfortune of his youth and act more pitiful. Fan Zhiyi would definitely not be able to help but sympathize with him.
…
Forget it, they shouldn't have been separated. It's only misfortune for him.
After all, I can't bear to let go.
The word "love" is really torturous.
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