Chapter 77 One day, I'll smash myself and the other person to pieces.
Qin Qing and Jiang Chen arrived half an hour later, their hurried steps stopping when they saw Lu Jinyuan sitting outside in the corridor.
It's hard to find an adjective to describe Lu Jinyuan as he appears now.
He was more dejected and disheveled than ever before, looking completely isolated and helpless, like a prisoner who was locked up and unwilling to save himself.
Upon seeing the person who arrived, Lu Jinyuan staggered to his feet, saying, "Dad, Mom."
Jiang Chen remained silent, his face turning blue and purple.
Qin Qing responded, "Is Qingying alright?"
"She's stable for now," Lu Jinyuan said. "Please take care of her."
Qin Qing was taken aback, "...And what about you?"
Qin Qing's face was full of disapproval, thinking that Lu Jinyuan was busy with other things at this time, while Jiang Chen felt like punching him.
Lu Jinyuan shook his head helplessly, and squeezed out a few words in a hoarse voice, "She doesn't want to see me."
Qin Qing looked at him intently. His pale face seemed devoid of any sign of life, and blood was still seeping from the white cloth bandaging his forehead. She couldn't help but sigh, "Let's go in first."
Lu Jinyuan opened the door for them, gestured for them to enter, and said again, "Thank you for your hard work, Mom and Dad."
Qin Qing was in a hurry to see her daughter, so she just nodded and didn't say anything. Jiang Chen, on the other hand, gave Lu Jinyuan a fierce glare as she passed by.
Jiang Qingying heard the door open and tried to sit up, but Qin Qing stopped her.
"It's best to stay in bed and not move around too much once you've settled down."
Jiang Qingying smiled helplessly, knowing that Qin Qing was worried, so she obediently lay back down and comforted her, "Mom, don't be nervous, I'm fine now."
"Jiang Chen, raise the hospital bed." Qin Qing held Jiang Qingying's hand, her heartache evident. "What happened?"
Jiang Qingying's smile faded, and she avoided her gaze. "Is there anything wrong?"
"Why would someone come to the hospital if there's nothing wrong?" Jiang Chen scoffed.
Jiang Qingying gave her father a haughty glare, then pouted at Qin Qing, "Mom, Dad is so fierce."
Qin Qing stood up for her daughter and glared at Jiang Chen.
Jiang Chen was speechless, but softened his voice, patted his daughter's head, and asked with concern, "Are you feeling better? Is there anything else that's bothering you?"
Jiang Qingying shook her head, "It's alright, the doctor said I can go home after two days of observation in the hospital."
Jiang Chen hesitated for a moment, then glanced at Qin Qing. The two of them tacitly refrained from mentioning anything else.
How could they not understand their own daughter? How could they not sense that she was avoiding the topic?
Jiang Qingying was exhausted after a long day. She could only say a few words to her parents before she fell asleep as soon as she closed her eyes.
Jiang Chen stayed behind to look after things, while Qin Qing went out to talk to Lu Jinyuan.
Lu Jinyuan sat motionless on the cold chair facing the door like a statue, his eyes fixed on the closed wooden door. He could vaguely hear conversations inside, but he couldn't make out the specific content.
He was like a cautious spy, secretly peeking inside from outside the door.
Jiang Qingying told him to leave, and he initially obeyed. However, once inside the elevator, he couldn't press the floor buttons. Standing in the enclosed elevator, going up and down different floors, he finally returned to this floor, but his legs wouldn't obey him and started to walk out.
He sat back down in his original spot and waited.
He despicably exploited the loopholes in her words.
She only said she wouldn't see him, but didn't say he couldn't stay outside.
When his back started to feel numb from sitting, the wooden door opened, and Qin Qing came out and sat down in the chair next to him.
Lu Jinyuan's red eyes were very dry, and his throat was weak from not speaking for so long. His Adam's apple bobbed several times before he could find his voice again.
“Mom, I’m sorry,” he said.
Qin Qing looked at him and asked softly, "Apologize for what?"
“I didn’t take good care of her. She was pregnant, and we even argued.” He listed his mistakes one by one, his voice growing softer and softer, and he looked so weak that he seemed ready to collapse at any moment.
Qin Qing sighed. She had heard a little about his car accident today, but not much. When he told her everything now, she was overwhelmed with mixed feelings, her eyes welled up with tears, and she swallowed back the words of blame that were on the tip of her tongue.
He looked so pitiful that I couldn't bear to say anything more.
“As an elder, I shouldn’t interfere in your marital affairs. Besides, she’s Xiaoying’s mother, so naturally I’ll side with her,” Qin Qing said. “But I also know Xiaoying’s temper. You two must have had a big argument, otherwise you wouldn’t have come to the hospital.”
Lu Jinyuan: "It's all my fault."
Qin Qing lowered her eyes. "When Xiaoying said she wanted to marry me, I was shocked and didn't really agree. But she insisted, and her father and I couldn't do anything about it. We were just worried that you two wouldn't get along after marriage because, in my opinion, your personalities are very incompatible. But I can feel that she likes you very much; she's just being stubborn." She looked up at him and smiled. "You just don't know how to express yourself. You two are like two stones colliding; one day you'll both shatter."
Lu Jinyuan fell into deep thought.
Qin Qing patted his shoulder and said earnestly, "The only way is to soften yourselves, put away your sharp edges, and lay your hearts out to each other. What you need most right now is to affirm each other."
After a long silence, Lu Jinyuan looked at Qin Qing with a firm gaze and said, "I understand."
"Don't rush, give Xiaoying some time to think it through." Qin Qing stood up and said, "It's getting late, you should go back and rest. We'll take care of things here."
Lu Jinyuan's deep eyes looked towards the door of the ward. "I'll stay here. I can't rest easy."
Qin Qing knew she couldn't persuade him, so she gave him a few words of advice and then returned to her ward.
-
Jiang Qingying stayed in the hospital for observation for two days, but still didn't budge on Lu Jinyuan's offer. So he waited outside the door. When he couldn't take it anymore, he would go to sleep. After waking up, he would eagerly run back, sit back in his original spot, and stare longingly at the door that was opening and closing.
Qin Qing told Jiang Qingying about this.
Jiang Qingying sipped the stewed soup, the warm broth flowing down her throat and into her stomach, feeling comforted and at ease. The soup tasted so good that she was so engrossed in drinking it that she seemed not to hear Qin Qing's words.
Seeing that Jiang Qingying ignored him, Qin Qing was so angry that he wanted to roar, "Don't pretend you didn't hear me!"
Jiang Qingying sighed, put down the porcelain spoon, and looked up at her: "Mom."
Qin Qing looked at her without saying a word.
"Is it possible that he's trying to gain sympathy?" Jiang Qingying subtly shifted the focus.
Perhaps he was truly reluctant to leave, but the reasons she gave were easy to convince Qin Qing.
Qin Qing was speechless, choked by the words.
Jiang Chen chuckled and chimed in, "We're all capitalists, who doesn't know a few tricks?"
Qin Qing was speechless, closed her eyes, and said with a look of utter despair, "Your world is so complicated."
She then gave Jiang Qingying a serious lecture, saying, "No wonder you two can argue. You both live your lives wrapped in armor. How can you live a good life like that?" She looked at Jiang Qingying and thought for a moment, "Actually, sometimes being a little confused isn't a bad thing."
As the saying goes, "It's good to be a little confused in life."
There's no need to see things too clearly, because if you see them too clearly, you can't accept them, but losing them is painful, so being a little confused seems to be the only solution.
Perhaps we don't need to dwell on whether we love each other or not. We can add a dreamy, hazy beauty to our confused love and forever hold onto the expectation of longing and companionship.
No one could see the struggle in Jiang Qingying's lowered eyes, nor could anyone see the clarity and determination in her eyes after her contemplation.
Just when Qin Qing thought she wouldn't hear a response, she spoke, her words resolute and unambiguous.
“I can pretend to be stupid and gloss over other things. But not with feelings, Mom. I want unconditional love. If it's not that, I'd rather not have it.”
Finally, returning to the most direct topic, Jiang Qingying said dejectedly, "I don't care, I don't want to see him right now. Let him stand outside if he wants."
It wasn't just Lu Jinyuan; she also needed time to think things through.
Qin Qing was at her wit's end and wanted to give up, but then she remembered something and said, "Jin Yuan just asked me if you're going home this afternoon after being discharged from the hospital."
Jiang Qingying: "Which family?"
Qin Qing was speechless: "You can go back to your parents' home too."
Jiang Qingying laughed: "Then I'll definitely go back to my parents' home."
Jiang Chen answered quickly: "Of course, Xiaoying will come home with us."
Qin Qing glanced at her husband, "Jin Yuan also guessed that you would come with us. He wanted to send you there and asked if you were willing."
Jiang Qingying thought for a while and finally relented: "If he wants to be a driver, let him be one."
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