It was already 10 p.m., and the square in front of Xingfu Community had become deserted. Only the faint lights from the nearby houses slightly illuminated the sidewalks of the community.
Shen Qian, carrying a backpack, walked silently through the crowd, the dappled light and shadow adding a touch of surrealism to his face.
Suddenly, a mad dog sprang out from the bushes and lunged at Shen Qian, but Shen Qian did not react at all.
"Woof woof... Awoof!"
The stray dog was kicked away by a figure that rushed out from the side, and ran away with its tail between its legs.
"Shenqian, why didn't you dodge? Oh, you... what's wrong with you?"
The girl first scolded him, but then she noticed Shen Qian's unusually dejected expression, which was quite different from his usual dejected look. She was startled and then carefully observed Shen Qian's eyes again.
"You...you're not crying, are you?"
"Just some sentimental thoughts."
Shen Qian finally came to his senses, glanced at the girl's delicate face, and asked in surprise, "How did you end up here?"
"I came... I just happened to be passing by and came to find you. People at school said you were back, but you hadn't replied to my messages, so I waited and waited downstairs. I was about to go home when I saw you come back, hehe!"
Huo Ling'er smiled foolishly. Only then did Shen Qian notice that her cheeks were a little pale from the night wind. He subconsciously raised his hand, but quickly stopped himself.
Want some drinks?
Shen Qian pulled a case of white beer out of his bag and laughed.
"Walk!"
Huo Ling'er waved her hand generously.
...
"...I told Captain Song the whole story. He was silent for a long time, but he didn't criticize me. He just said that he had thought about this scene countless times. For a man, dying on the battlefield is not a bad end."
“But I know that’s not what he really thought. When I left the funeral hall, I saw him sitting in front of the ice coffin, with his back to me.”
Chen Qian, who was sitting on the edge of the rooftop, took a big gulp of beer, then let out a long breath and said with certainty.
"He cried, but he just didn't want me to see it."
"At that moment, I felt guilty as well."
"Yeah, although it seems like it has nothing to do with me, I can't help but wonder, if Principal Huang and the others hadn't tried to clear the way for me, maybe... that bastard wouldn't have tried to run away?"
"Perhaps it's still a bit far-fetched, but when a snow avalanche occurs, what innocent snowflake is there?"
"At that time, we were comrades who should have relied on each other for life and death!"
"I still can't convince myself... I didn't kill Bo Ren, but Bo Ren died because of me. Maybe that's the feeling?"
"Or if I were even more awesome, no one would have to die."
Shen Qian crumpled the can in his hand into a ball and took another can of beer from Huo Ling'er, who was listening quietly beside him.
“Ouyang Fei and Zifang... are the friends I just told you about who I met during the college entrance exam. They were singing at a karaoke bar, and I sat down for a while.”
"I don't want to play games, I just want to talk to them."
"But I forgot that their memories were all hazy."
"They remember Song Ben, but they've forgotten he's dead."
"They are still releasing the pressure after the college entrance examination. When I heard them singing 'The wind blows,' I felt like laughing and crying at the same time."
"Human joys and sorrows are not shared; I only find their noise annoying."
"I don't know if I thought they were being noisy, or if they thought I didn't fit in, but I couldn't sit still anymore, so I took the drinks and left..."
"I suddenly remembered a phrase, especially when they asked me if I was unhappy. The funniest thing was that they actually thought I was upset about not doing well on the first two exams..."
"Hold!"
Huo Ling'er nervously grasped Shen Qian's hand, but Shen Qian shook his head to indicate that he was alright.
"I also thought of the mother and child I saw on the street..."
“You know, this world is not peaceful. At the funeral, Captain Sun told me that even though their Right Wing Battalion is an elite unit, their annual casualty rate is still around 20%.”
"That means their battalion loses about two hundred men every year, without fail."
"No one pays attention to these numbers, and they are unwilling to publicize them. The saddest thing is that many military families will no longer mention them. Some people have received their pensions and started new lives, perhaps even starting new families..."
"I can't explain it clearly. It seems to involve so-called human nature, and I don't want to explore that much. It's too tiring."
Chen Qian's voice gradually lowered. He picked up a can of wine again, opened the lid, and stood up.
"This drink was originally meant to be shared with Brother Song when we returned to Jingcheng. Now, I suppose we can say we're drinking it together..."
He poured the wine down before sinking.
"Thank you for listening to all my nonsense."
Some of the frustration in his chest subsided, and he smiled forward.
"We're...we're friends, so it's only right." Huo Ling'er tilted her head and said, "Besides, I came here today to comfort you, so it wasn't a wasted trip!"
"You knew about these things before?" Shen Qian asked in surprise.
"No, it's..." Huo Ling'er stammered.
"Anything else?" Shen Qian raised an eyebrow, moving closer. "Speak!"
"You, you shouldn't get so close, they're just saying..."
Huo Ling'er, leaning against the corner of the wall, felt a little dizzy. She pushed Shen Qian away a bit before she regained some of her thinking ability.
"Shenqian, did you not do well on your martial arts college entrance exam?" Huo Ling'er asked cautiously.
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