Volume 4: Phoenix Crying in the Ninth Heaven
**Section 1: The Apprenticeship Express in the Valley of Ten Thousand Poisons**
The "Pacifier Gold Shop" has expanded its business into the deep sea. The mermaids traded a ton of night-shining pearls for a "Waterproof Parenting Guide." It's said their cubs now listen to "Lady Zhenguo's Storytelling (Underwater Bubble Sound Effect Version)" before bed. Ashina Golden Wolf's "Ode to Grassland Milk" has been officially published, featuring an abstract cover of Su Heng, the second child, blowing snot bubbles. Sales have been surprisingly strong. Su Qi, the fourth child, has created the "Fuwa Holy Light," a popular "koi blessing" across the four kingdoms. Citizens line up to seek its light, forcing the young girl to wear a veil whenever she goes out to avoid fans.
The fifth baby's movements in the womb grew stronger, as if reminding everyone of his or her imminent arrival. Su Li, under Xiao Jue's Tai Chi massage, enjoyed the "queen" treatment of her late pregnancy. In this peaceful moment (if you ignore the second baby's attempt to "stamp" a potted plant with a "wind-adjusting seal" pacifier to accelerate its growth), an "expedited delivery" from the underworld shattered the tranquility of the General's Mansion.
The visitor was a dusty, green-faced outer disciple of the Ten Thousand Poison Valley (literally, as if allergic to some plant dye). He trembled as he held an ebony box bound with nine layers of black iron chains, emitting an ominous purple-black aura. He knelt before Su Li with a thud, his voice trembling:
"Madam… Madam, the guardian of the nation! The entire Ten Thousand Poison Valley… implore you… to accept this!" Trembling, he presented the box and an envelope embroidered with a ferocious centipede in gold thread. "This… is the most sacred relic of this valley, the complete Ten Thousand Poisons Scripture! Along with… the annotations and insights of successive valley masters! The ancestors… say… that you must accept it! Otherwise… otherwise, they will… collectively move to your doorstep and go on a hunger strike!"
Su Li: "..." She looked at the box that exuded a "keep away from strangers" aura, and her mouth twitched. How could this be a gift for becoming a disciple? This was clearly a hot potato plus! And the kind that was bio-contaminated!
Xiao Jue calmly stepped forward, his Tai Chi rhythm flowing, isolating the box's ominous aura. The shadowy image of Dabao Su Chen's causal abacus emerged, gently tapping the beads. "Mother, there are no traps within the box. The energy properties... are extremely complex and dangerous, but their core purpose is 'inheritance,' not 'attack.'"
Su Li suspiciously opened the centipede letter. The letter paper was made of some tough animal skin. The handwriting was unrestrained and uninhibited, revealing a tragic and majestic feeling of "I am almost dying":
**“From the Honorable Su:**
**We are the successive masters of the Ten Thousand Poisons Valley (collectively faking death)! Thinking back to the days when you repelled enemies with your silver needles, trapped and killed three thousand cavalrymen with your poisonous array, and even guided our ancestors with your venomous tongue... ahem, supreme wisdom (see Volume 3, Chapter 76), we know that the true master of the Ten Thousand Poisons Sutra has appeared! It must be you!**
**Of course! Ever since your shocking 'parenting logic' polluted... ahem, influenced the Way of Heaven, the 'toxic Way' that we rely on for survival has suffered a devastating blow! **
**Performance is as follows**
1. **Toxin Ineffective**: After carefully cultivating the 'Seven-Step Soul-Severing Powder', the target took seven steps and simply burped and farted! The fart was rainbow-colored (possibly due to the residual effects of the Three Treasures Dragon Horn purification)!
2. **Poisonous Insect Rebellion**: The Poison King of the Valley, 'Centipede Centipede,' has recently become obsessed with knitting sweaters! He's knitting with poisonous silk! He even requested rainbow socks for his little centipede cubs! (Influenced by the Seven Treasures' Holy Light?)
3. **Poisonous Weed Mutation**: The painstakingly crafted 'Rotten Bone Orchid' blossoms have a milky fragrance! Attracting a flock of bees to gather nectar! The bees even brew 'Orchid Milk Honey,' which is good for your health! (Is it the aftereffect of the Hengbao pacifier stamp?)
4. **We're the worst off**: Practicing poisonous skills requires absorbing toxic miasma and hostility, now purified by the Heavenly Dao to a purity purer than Wahaha! My disciples' cultivation has collectively regressed, and even the blood I cough up smells like pink strawberry (the Seven Treasures' Holy Light penetrates deep into my bones)! This poison...can't be refined! The Valley is doomed!
**In summary! We have unanimously decided! We will pack up the Ten Thousand Poisons Sutra and the Ten Thousand Poisons Valley... ahem, and present the Sutra to you, the Holy Lord! Please, for the sake of the poison cultivators of the world (even though they are almost unemployed), point out a clear path for the poison path! Redefine the laws of poison! Otherwise... we will literally lie down at your door! Even pink blood can write a blood letter! **
**——The old poisoners in the Ten Thousand Poison Valley collectively shed tears and kowtow (the blood is really pink)"**
Su Li finished reading the letter, then looked at the ebony box. Then she thought of the image of the old poisoners from the Ten Thousand Poison Valley lying in front of the gate, vomiting pink strawberry-flavored blood. Her scalp tingled. How could this be considered inheritance? This was a scapegoat! They were forcing the whole mess of the "Poison Path Collapse" and the treasure that held the valley together onto her!
[Ding! Triggering hidden quest: 'Redemption and Rebirth of the Poison Path'!] The Poison Tongue System is now live! [Quest Description: Take over the "Ten Thousand Poisons Sutra" and, under the "Cute Baby Logic Polluted Version" Heavenly Dao, redefine the essence of poison and create a new era for the Poison Path! Quest Reward: Unlock the ultimate title of "Poison Saint"! +5 million Merit Points! And... get rid of the old poisonous creature lying dead at your doorstep! Penalty for failure: Your doorstep becomes a branch of the Ten Thousand Poison Valley (Strawberry Flavored Version)!]
"Accept it! Must accept it!" Su Li held her forehead. For the sake of peace and quiet at her doorstep, for the sake of those 5 million merit points (the pressure of repaying the mortgage was immense), this… ahem, this inheritance, she accepted it!
**Section 2: Cute Baby Class: What is poison? **
How to redefine the laws of poison? Su Li looked at the "Myriad Poisons Manual" that exuded an ominous purple aura, and then looked at the four adorable babies sitting in a row next to it, staring curiously at the box (the second baby tried to "stamp" the box with a pacifier, but was pulled away by Xiao Jue), and a bold idea emerged.
"My dears!" Su Li clapped her hands, attracting the attention of the adorable babies. "Mommy is about to start the class! Today's topic is - What is poison?"
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