On New Year's Eve, I don't want to see fireworks, I want to see you...
On New Year's Eve, it snowed all day long.
Social media platforms were flooded with snow scenes and the character "福" (fortune), creating a strong festive atmosphere for the Chinese New Year.
Xin Xiaomei was busy preparing the New Year's Eve dinner in the kitchen. The Spring Festival decorations that Lin Shiren had bought were also arriving one after another. She was unpacking the packages while video chatting with Dong Rui.
Dong Rui has recently become obsessed with tarot cards. Wearing a strange hat, she shuffles and cuts the cards with great ceremony, dividing them into three piles and then spreading them out in a row.
"Now choose one based on your first instinct."
Lin Shih-Jin tested the switch on the small colored lights and looked back at the camera: "Hmm... let's go with the middle one."
Before flipping the card, Dong Rui paused noticeably: "By the way, what was your question again?"
Lin Shih-ren suppressed a laugh and said seriously, "The dog at the lottery station downstairs is pregnant. I'd like to ask who the father of the child is?"
Dong Rui rolled her eyes with a haughty expression: "I feel offended."
Lin Shiren stuck out his tongue: "Master, the puppy is really pitiful because it got pregnant. We must catch the culprit. Please have mercy on us."
That sounds nice.
Dong Rui pretended to be profound, flipped over a card, then awkwardly looked up the definition in a book, finally saying vaguely, "It's near the lottery station, the male dog is smaller, and the two dogs seem to have fallen in love..."
Lin Shiren nodded repeatedly: "I know, I know. After it has its babies, its boyfriend will definitely come to see it, and then we'll know who the murderer is."
Dong Rui: "..."
She raised an eyebrow with an air of importance: "Instead of calculating these pointless things, why not calculate your future with Zhou Lin..."
Lin Shiren coughed lightly: "No need, there's nothing wrong with our relationship."
As people get older, they seem to become more and more superstitious. Looking back on her time with Zhou Lin, it seems like they were brought together by a series of coincidences, as if it were destined.
Dong Rui thought about it and agreed, "While a proper match is important, a tragic love affair can also be quite fascinating. If you meet someone like Zhou Lin, who is a rare gem in the world, just let go of your mental burdens and go for it no matter what the future holds."
Lin Shiren: "?"
That's a real offense!
After hanging up the video call, the little fortune teller wasn't satisfied and went to harass other people.
Lin Shiren hung up the festive decorations and changed the water for the golden wintersweet. Xin Xiaomei's New Year's Eve dinner was also served at the same time, with a bottle of sparkling wine placed next to it.
There were hardly any people walking around in the neighborhood anymore. Every household had hung up their lanterns, and as far as the eye could see, everything was bathed in a bright red glow.
Another year has passed in a flash.
Having been maliciously slandered and having her wounds healed by love, Lin Shiren carefully calculated that she had gained more than she had lost. In particular, her mother-daughter relationship with Xin Xiaomei had shaken off the dust and was able to see the stars again.
Sparkling wine has a low alcohol content, but it has a strong aftereffect. Xin Xiaomei didn't want her to drink it, but she drank quite a bit herself. When she was feeling tipsy, the first thing she said was, "Time really flies."
After this opening remark, Lin Shih-jen knew it was time to reminisce about the past.
Xin Xiaomei propped her chin up with her hand, her movements slowing down a bit: "That year you weren't even as tall as the table. We went to your grandma's house for the New Year. I was making dumplings, and you started wailing and crying at the top of your lungs, refusing to let me do any work. Your grandma was so angry that her face turned green."
This was probably one of the few happy times Xin Xiaomei experienced in that marriage.
She had mentioned this many times, but because it was so long ago, Lin Shiren had long forgotten about it. She tentatively asked, "Mom, can I not go to Grandma's house tomorrow?"
"Lin Shih-ren, don't be so clueless."
The wine glass clattered onto the table, and Xin Xiaomei's alcohol level dropped instantly, causing her newly permed hair curls to tremble three times on the spot.
"How can you collect New Year's money if you don't go? Your grandma's, your dad's, your aunt's, so many red envelopes, why not take them? You only get to take advantage of them once a year. If you don't go, they'll save money. They'll probably be overjoyed."
Lin Shiren said in a low voice, "But they always say bad things about you in a sarcastic way..."
Hearing her defend her, Xin Xiaomei's momentum softened a bit, and she snorted coldly, "Speak up, I'm not in pain or itchy, I can't even sneeze, what else can I do?"
Lin Shiren shrank his neck, thinking to himself, if you can really laugh it off so easily, how did you end up arguing so fiercely with your grandmother back then?
Xin Xiaomei got angry at the sight of her being bullied and lightly patted her forehead: "My divorce and my surname Lin are two separate things, don't confuse them."
Perhaps it was the alcohol, but she became a little sentimental: "If I'm gone one day, they will be the closest people to you in this world. Don't bear things alone, remember?"
People who work in hospitals are used to seeing life and death, so they speak less with restraint. But Lin Shiren is different. Her fingertips dug into her palm, and she held back her tears as she said, "Mom, then you can stay here forever, okay?"
Xin Xiaomei chuckled and pulled out a tissue to wipe her tears: "You're so old, why are you still crying? You'll get married and have children someday, and start your own family..."
When the topic came up, she added, "You must be discerning when you look for a boyfriend in the future. Looks are not important; you must consider his character and family background."
Lin Shih-jen quietly retorted, "Then why did you go to Dad? Was it because you didn't keep your eyes open?"
This hit Xin Xiaomei where it hurt. She rarely hesitated, but instead glared at Lin Shiren with the rest of her eyes, and went to clear the dishes.
I can't be bothered with you.
She had just finished her New Year's Eve dinner when Wang Shu from downstairs came to ask her to set off fireworks at the alley entrance.
After finally getting two days off, Xin Xiaomei didn't want Lin Shiren to read tonight, so she took his snow boots out of the shoe cabinet and pushed him out: "Go ahead, be careful when setting off fireworks, don't get burned."
The government has been strictly controlling fireworks for the past two years. Outdoor fireworks must be set off in designated areas. The closest designated area to the Mercury Community is a small square.
Lin Shiren and Wang Shu were bundled up tightly, fully equipped with scarves and gloves. Their boots crunched on the snow, making a "crunch crunch" sound. From behind, they looked like two clumsy penguins.
Red lanterns hung along the way, making the snowflakes sparkle. The small square was already quite crowded, with strings of bright lights mingling with laughter.
Wang Shu waved the burning sparkler, then switched her phone to camera mode and handed it over: "Renren, can you take a picture for me? I want to send it to my boyfriend."
Her boyfriend is in the same school as her but in a different class. Wang Shu had already mentioned this on the way, and she also expressed concern about the long-distance relationship in the future.
This is perhaps the most common romantic fate for high school seniors.
After the two took a few photos of each other holding sparklers, Lin Shiren thought for a moment, opened his pinned WeChat contact, and then, following suit, selected a photo and sent it to him.
A cold moon hung overhead, and the fireworks in my hand were still flashing when Zhou Lin's video call came in right on cue. He asked, "Where are you?"
Lin Shiren's lips unconsciously curved into a smile: "In the small square at the alley entrance." She switched to the rear camera to show him the people in the square.
Zhou Lin immediately protested, "I don't want to see fireworks, I want to see you."
Such a direct conversation made Lin Shiren blush, because he was spending the Lunar New Year at his grandfather's house, and his phone background was full of strangers. However, she hadn't experienced such a lively Lunar New Year's Eve for many years.
The fireworks fell to the ground after they were finished. Lin Shiren pressed the lighter, and a small flower seedling suddenly appeared next to her face. Her soft eyes looked at the screen: "Zhou Lin, do you still want to watch? I'll set them off for you."
The whole city was bidding farewell to the old year and welcoming the new. Elders were toasting each other. Zhou Lin had heard too many formalities today. Some praised him for being sensible, some praised him for being successful, some inquired about what projects he was working on recently, and some even reminded him not to forget his roots after he became successful... Only one little girl asked him if he wanted to see fireworks.
His heart melted; he felt like she was coaxing a three-year-old. Yet, he still smiled in agreement: "I want to see."
Lin Shiren happily lit another cigarette and said into the microphone, "Zhou Lin, you must be happy in the new year!"
Zhou Lin stared at her for a while, then said, half-jokingly, "Next year, I'll spend the New Year with you."
*
The snow continued until the early hours of the first day of the lunar new year. When the sun rose, the sky over Huaicheng was exceptionally clear, but the temperature was even lower.
At 10 a.m., Lin Shiren brought tonics and fruit to his grandmother's house to wish her a Happy New Year.
Grandma Lin's house was just two streets away. Lin Zhiyuan had bought that apartment in the Mercury Community as their wedding home under the pretext that it would be convenient for them to live nearby and take care of each other. Unfortunately, Xin Xiaomei and her grandmother did not get along well after the marriage, and they did not visit each other much. In Xin Xiaomei's childhood memories, Grandma Lin would only come over in the wind and rain when Xin Xiaomei and Lin Zhiyuan had quarreled.
The person who opened the door was Ni Changran, Lin Zhiyuan's second wife.
Her long hair was still covered in flour, her sweater sleeves were rolled up to her forearms, she was holding a half-broken string bean in her hand, and the logo on her apron was very large, like a free gift from a well-known instant noodle brand.
After a brief silence, Lin Shiren quickly smiled politely and said, "Aunt Ni, Happy New Year."
Ni Changran smiled and pointed to the ground: "Change into those pink slippers."
That's how relationships are in blended families: everyone wears a mask, maintains a superficial relationship, and keeps it brief.
The female members were cooking in the kitchen, while the men were sitting in the living room drinking tea with their legs crossed. Lin Shiren placed the gifts in the entryway and began the most difficult time of the year for everyone—paying New Year's greetings to unfamiliar elders.
"Happy New Year, Grandma."
"Happy New Year, Dad."
"Happy New Year, Auntie."
"Uncle, Happy New Year."
"..."
You have to greet everyone, and you have to force yourself to have a few awkward words with everyone. If you don't, it's like you're not being hospitable.
After walking around like this, Lin Shih-jen almost died on the spot.
The TV in the living room was on, showing a rerun of a Spring Festival Gala skit. She sat in the corner of the sofa, lost in thought. After some time, a little boy suddenly rushed out of the bedroom, making "tap tap tap" noises, running from one end of the sofa to the other in his shoes. Just as he was about to pounce on her, Ni Changran yelled at him from behind, "Haohao, get down here! If you bump into your sister, you'll get a beating!"
The little boy looked about five or six years old, with big, round eyes and a mouthful of neat baby teeth. He was very cute and was her younger brother, Lin Tianyu.
Lin Tianyu awkwardly jumped down and stood opposite Lin Shiren: "Are you my sister?"
Lin Shih-ren: "Yes."
The siblings hadn't seen each other for over two years, so it's normal that he didn't recognize them.
Ni Changran introduced her: "Haohao, this is your sister. Don't be rude."
But when Ni Changran went to the kitchen to help, the little boy made a face at her and then ran away with his gun.
Grandma Lin's house holds many childhood memories for her.
At that time, Xin Xiaomei and Lin Zhiyuan were still married. Lin Shiren was often sent over on weekends. She loved to play hide-and-seek in the house and would even transform the bunk bed in the small bedroom into a "princess's palace." She tore several of her grandmother's scarves.
Before I knew it, I was in the small bedroom. The bunk bed was still there, but it was now covered with toy cars.
While she was lost in thought, something suddenly hit her brow bone. It didn't hurt much, but if it moved a few centimeters down, it would hit her eye. Turning around, she saw Hao Hao hiding by the door, grinning and pointing a gun at her: "Don't move."
Children of this age are probably only considered cute by their parents.
Lin Shiren took a breath, his face grim: "Why did you hit me?"
"I'm playing a game where I fight bad guys."
Am I a bad person?
Hao Hao opened his innocent big eyes and made a face at her again: "Uncle said you're the one who steals my red envelopes."
"You are a bad person."
-----------------------
Author's note: There's not much of the high school part left. I'll try to be more diligent lately. The young couple will have a major disagreement.
The following sections focus on university life and won't cover marriage or having children. If you have any requests regarding university life, feel free to leave a comment.
I also wrote in the caption: "Some people are towering trees that block out the sun, while others are quiet, daydreaming blades of grass. This article is dedicated to those girls who weren't born to be strong, independent women. Slowly overcoming your timidity is also a way of loving yourself."
Renren's growth is the core of the novel. She may never become a decisive and ruthless strong woman, but she represents the millions of soft yet resilient girls in this world.
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