As if Lu Shizhen had regained her senses, she immediately leaned down and rested her head on Xu Shiyue's lap, not caring whether this would affect her own points.
While one might say Lu Shizhen was out of her mind, upon hearing Xu Shiyue's words, she quickly crossed her arms over her chest, warily and earnestly reminding the person in front of her, "I don't sell myself."
Xu Shiyue's eyes curved slightly when she saw Lu Shizhen's reaction.
She didn't know where the sudden interest came from, but she raised her hand and poked Lu Shizhen's cheek: "Really?"
The neatly trimmed nails gently brushed across the girl's delicate skin, slowly lifting her chin.
Although his dark eyes were indistinct, they were still scrutinizing him: "I think your face is so beautiful, can't I at least reciprocate?"
Hearing Xu Shiyue say that, Lu Shizhen immediately felt a little aggrieved: "It's not like I wanted to grow up like this."
Then she turned her head away and rubbed her face a little hard: "Glamorous and arrogant, you can tell at a glance she's a lunatic."
Xu Shiyue raised her hand and took away Lu Shizhen's hand that was teasing her, and laughed, "You have a good understanding of your own position."
Lu Shizhen was truly drunk and couldn't tell good from bad. Hearing Xu Shiyue's affirmative tone, she immediately raised her head and said, "Of course, I am Lu Shizhen."
"Your name is Lu Shizhen?" Xu Shiyue asked, as if she had grasped something.
“Yes, my name is Lu Shizhen, and I never change my name.” Lu Shizhen’s voice was firm, but her eyes dimmed slightly as she spoke. “Oh, it seems like it won’t work.”
"It won't work?" Xu Shiyue didn't understand.
Lu Shizhen hummed in agreement.
She wanted to explain, but her mind seemed unable to process all the twists and turns between the two worlds. So she simply waved her hand at Xu Shiyue and said in a serious tone, "You don't understand, this is a historical issue."
"What historical issues?" Xu Shiyue asked again.
“It’s the past.” Lu Shizhen looked up at Xu Shiyue, who was above her, with some disdain. “Xu Shiyue, how come you don’t even understand this?”
Xu Shiyue naturally replied, "Yes, it's precisely because I don't understand that you have to tell me what this past is."
Lu Shizhen blinked upon hearing this, and thought it made sense.
But she was also confused and felt that this person was setting some kind of trap for her. She was so smart, how could she not understand what she was saying?
Unfortunately, before Lu Shizhen could reach a conclusion, Xu Shiyue's voice interrupted her: "Even if it's your reward for resting your head on my lap."
After going around in circles, the topic has returned to "returns".
Lu Shizhen rested her head on Xu Shiyue's legs again. The faint fragrance mixed with the slightly bitter medicine scent entered her nostrils, making her somewhat bewitched: "Alright then."
But then Lu Shizhen became somewhat troubled: "But I don't know where to begin."
She had a past spanning two worlds, and her drunken mind was like an old, worn-out CPU, unable to handle the strain.
“Then let’s start with the points that impressed you the most,” Xu Shiyue suggested to Lu Shizhen.
“Deeply memorable…” As if she had been given a topic for an essay, Lu Shizhen crossed her legs and looked up as she pondered her past. “My life before wasn’t as good as it is now, and there weren’t as many people who truly cared about me as there are here. As long as I was alive, that was enough, since I still had a younger sister. It’s like this account was ruined, so they created another one. The new account was very successful, especially lucky.”
"She's a head taller than me, has fair skin, and is good at studying... but she's not as pretty as you."
As Lu Shizhen spoke, she gave Xu Shiyue, who was looking up at her, a fawning smile.
She seemed carefree, but Xu Shiyue felt as if her heart had been twisted.
If possible, who would willingly objectify themselves and compare themselves to a piece of trash?
But what exactly did she go through in the past that would make her compare herself to a piece of trash...?
"My legs hurt so much in October."
Just as she was thinking this, Xu Shiyue heard a soft call.
This wasn't the first time she'd heard Lu Shizhen call her by her first name without her surname, but her heart still skipped a beat at this rare display of intimacy.
Lu Shizhen had turned slightly to the side at some point in her line of sight, her furrowed brows suggesting she was enduring pain.
The doctor didn't find any fractures in Lu Shizhen's body during the examination. Xu Shiyue thought that Lu Shizhen must have bumped her leg when she knelt on the ground, so she reached out and groped to rub her leg.
In a daze, Lu Shizhen felt a soft warmth covering her legs.
The warmth clung to her skin, gently permeating her flesh and blood, gradually easing the pain that had suddenly surged from her memory.
Is it any better?
A familiar voice reached Lu Shizhen's ears, pulling her back from the pain that had subsided.
Lu Shizhen was taken aback for a moment, then took advantage of the situation and pressed her face against Xu Shiyue's leg, replying with a smile, "Much better, Shiyue, you're so kind."
Xu Shiyue lowered her eyes slightly, ignoring Lu Shizhen's overly intimate behavior.
She noticed that Lu Shizhen's voice sounded better than before, so she said, "Let's continue."
"Continue with what?" Lu Shizhen tilted her head to look at Xu Shiyue.
Xu Shiyue calmly reminded him, "Continue talking about your childhood."
Lu Shizhen never thought her childhood stories were particularly interesting, so she was quite surprised to hear Xu Shiyue's words: "You like to hear about them?"
Xu Shiyue hummed in agreement: "That's why I want you to tell me more."
"I never thought my childhood stories were actually that interesting." The drunk Lu Shizhen didn't think about anything else, and was even encouraged by Xu Shiyue's words. She tried to think and remembered something that impressed her: "By the way, did I tell you that I won the national gold medal in the youth group when I was fifteen?"
Xu Shiyue, of course, had no idea, and shook her head in agreement: "No."
"Oh dear, you almost missed out on one of the most important events in my life!" Lu Shizhen said, feeling both nervous and annoyed, yet also secretly pleased. "Luckily, I thought of that."
Lu Shizhen raised her voice, as if afraid Xu Shiyue wouldn't believe her, and continued, "Do you know how many people would kill for the digital painting I drew for you? My best friend even checked out my autograph on Xianyu before..."
"Female friend?"
Lu Shizhen was interrupted by Xu Shiyue's question before she could finish speaking.
She assumed that Xu Shiyue didn't understand her online term and patiently explained to her, "It means good friend, very good friend. Although I've never met her and we only chat online, it doesn't stop us from being best buddies."
"So it's another way of saying 'friend'." Xu Shiyue flicked her long hair that was hanging down to her side, a hint of a sneer flashing across her face.
"Hey, don't interrupt me."
Lu Shizhen was somewhat displeased with Xu Shiyue's action, so she reached out and grabbed the hand that was blocking her from facing her, and said mysteriously, "Guess how much my best friend told me I got my autographed item for?"
Xu Shiyue was also unaware of this matter, only estimating based on her experience with auctions of other celebrities' autographs: "One thousand?"
Upon hearing this, Lu Shizhen couldn't help but smile, and proudly gestured a zero to Xu Shiyue, saying, "Add another zero."
"Don't you think I'm very precious?"
The girl looked up, showing off, her eyes sparkling in the light.
Xu Shiyue looked at Lu Shizhen lying on her lap, ran her fingers through Lu Shizhen's long hair that was scattered beside her legs, and nodded: "Yes, you are very precious."
The room temperature was kept constant at 27 degrees Celsius, and Xu Shiyue's palms were no longer as cold as before.
The gentle warmth fell on Lu Shizhen's hair. Whether it was because she felt affirmed or because of this warmth, Lu Shizhen's smile deepened.
Children who are praised tend to express more thoughts to the other person, and Lu Shizhen is no exception.
She then told Xu Shiyue, "But I don't encourage this behavior. It's too wasteful of money. Money is hard to earn, but it's spent very quickly."
Xu Shiyue nodded, indicating her agreement and affirmation: "You are a very responsible public figure."
This evaluation was significantly higher than Lu Shizhen had anticipated. She became a little nervous and quickly declined, saying, "No, no, I'm not a public figure. I'm just a useless person holed up in a small room. I only wanted to share my paintings at first, but who knew that more and more people would like them."
"I think I probably wouldn't have had so much happiness without that board."
Lu Shizhen's thoughts have always been very simple, without much utilitarianism.
Having fought for her life for most of her life, she knew all too well what it meant to be content with what she had and to cherish the rare peace and tranquility.
Xu Shiyue had previously disagreed with this somewhat moderate idea, but at this moment she felt she could understand Lu Shizhen's thoughts: "Painting is a very important thing for you."
“Yes.” Lu Shizhen nodded. “I can draw many places I’ve never seen or been to, and it’s like they’ve really come to life. Nothing makes me happier than that.”
Xu Shiyue listened to Lu Shizhen's words, her eyelashes slightly lowered.
For some reason, she thought of the little girl in her dream again. Was the painting on the wall something she had never seen before, and that's why she painted it?
So what places has Lu Shizhen never seen or been to?
She compared herself to a defective product, but where exactly is she defective?
Psychological disability, or...
"Hey, why are you making that face? Did you think I forgot to give you the drawing?"
Xu Shiyue was just thinking this when her thoughts were interrupted by Lu Shizhen's voice.
The person seemed a little unhappy with their distraction, and suddenly sat up from their lap, saying to themselves with a serious expression, "Let me tell you, I haven't forgotten. And I'm almost finished drawing it, just need to add a few more details."
As if to prove she wasn't lying, Lu Shizhen moved closer to Xu Shiyue and said, "Hey, do you want to know what that painting looks like?"
Xu Shiyue didn't want to know about this surprise beforehand, nor did she know how to share it with Lu Shizhen when she couldn't see clearly.
But looking into Lu Shizhen's hazy yet expectant eyes, she still went along with it: "What does it look like?"
“Like this…” Lu Shizhen said, kneeling down beside Xu Shiyue and touching her pocket.
She wanted to share the unfinished product on her phone with Xu Shiyue, but she couldn't find her phone after searching for a long time.
Then, Lu Shizhen realized that even if she found the phone, she could still give the half-finished product to Xu Shiyue.
She was drunk, but she also knew that Xu Shiyue couldn't see her paintings now.
Lu Shizhen's previously excited expression darkened, and her body sank down as well.
Lu Shizhen felt that the most wonderful thing in the world was color, which could reveal all sorts of bizarre and wonderful things through various combinations and arrangements.
It's such a pity that Xu Shiyue can't see it.
But after a short while, Lu Shizhen seemed to have thought of something and straightened her back.
She transformed the colorful images into words and described them directly to Xu Shiyue: "It was a starry sky, and a little girl was standing in the wilderness below. She was dancing, her skirt fluttering, and her outstretched hand looked like it was about to touch the stars!"
Xu Shiyue was somewhat surprised, and she didn't expect Lu Shizhen to break down a picture and describe it to her in a vivid and detailed way.
She suddenly realized that her relationship with Lu Shizhen was never just one-sided compromise.
From the very beginning, this person did far more for himself.
support.
It gave me the will to live.
They defend themselves in a biased manner.
...
The light that illuminated her first birthday after she came of age slowly spread out in Xu Shiyue's vision.
She didn't know why her so-called rationality helped her block out all the things Lu Shizhen had done for her in the past, but she couldn't possibly forget them just because she blocked them out.
Lu Shizhen was indeed her weakness.
But she knew she couldn't do it, and she didn't want to get rid of this weakness.
Because this bone wasn't placed into her body by Lu Shizhen, but rather grew out of her body.
It looked fragile and delicate, like a faded rose, yet it supported her pale, decaying body along with the other bones.
"That little girl is so pretty, long black hair, white dress, her face, her face..."
As Xu Shiyue listened to Lu Shizhen's description, before she could finish speaking, she was suddenly enveloped by a shadow that loomed close by.
Lu Shizhen seemed to have mentioned something she couldn't describe in words, and thus she rashly approached Xu Shiyue.
The faint, almost imperceptible scent of roses silently wafted out from her flowing hair, and like the person who had suddenly approached, it filled Xu Shiyue's nose and heart, causing her heart to race for reasons she couldn't quite place.
Alcohol clouded Lu Shizhen's judgment, allowing her to recklessly lash out at Xu Shiyue.
The sunlight outside the window was perfect, drawing a golden halo around Lu Shizhen from behind. As she pressed Xu Shiyue against the headboard, the excessive brightness fell into Xu Shiyue's line of sight.
Xu Shiyue had no idea what Lu Shizhen was planning to do, and her heart skipped a beat.
Then she saw Lu Shizhen raise her hand, which was supporting her on the side, and place it warm on her eye.
"Right here, there's a small mole."
The warmth of her fingers touching her cheek and the coolness of her back against the headboard pressed against Xu Shiyue's body at the same time. The ambiguous atmosphere mixed with the smell of alcohol emanated from Lu Shizhen's lips, making her blood surge instantly.
In Xu Shiyue's life, everything happened suddenly.
It was like a fire, like an escape from a hospital.
Xu Shiyue blinked twice unconsciously at the person's movement, but then suddenly stopped after opening her eyes.
She saw Lu Shizhen's eyelashes slowly part in her line of sight, her slow breathing causing them to flutter, each lash drawing a long-lost boundary out of the blurry surroundings.
She saw it.
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