Chapter 37: Perform Better This is not Lin Xicai's illusion, for Li...
This was not Lin Xicai's illusion. For Li Ci, the person he hated the most became the last bit of hope in his dark life.
He was exiled to this place, alone, in a place where even the air was dead. His arrogance was devoured, his sharpness was ground down, his integrity and dignity became a joke in the face of survival, and even his language skills began to deteriorate.
Sometimes he didn't have the chance to utter a word for ten days or half a month, and when he opened his mouth the sounds he made were unfamiliar even to himself.
He ended up in this situation because of her. He hated her, hated her so much, but he also wanted to see her, wanted to see her all the time, wanted her to stay a little longer.
When she didn't show up, he wanted her to die, but when she showed up, he hoped she would never leave.
This contradictory and torn feeling tore at his soul all the time, destroying his heart. His soul was torn in two, one half wanted to tear her apart, the other half wanted to get closer to her.
What frightened him even more was that the desire to be close to her was so strong that it almost won out in the tearing.
He hated himself so much that he developed an almost self-destructive tendency both psychologically and behaviorally.
Lin Xicai didn't have the extra energy to pay too much attention to this person. When she was about to leave after delivering dinner, she still stared at the shocking wound on his arm for a moment.
Li Ci lowered his head and ate the lunch box obediently. Blood was dripping from his arm, but he seemed not to feel it at all.
Lin Xicai stared at him for a while, then sat down next to him for the first time.
The moment she sat down, Li Ci's body tensed up a bit as if by reflex. He slowly raised his head from his lunch box, his eyes filled with a dull look of disbelief.
Lin Xicai didn't look at his face, but only stared at the more and more hideous wounds on his arms: "Does it hurt?" she asked.
Li Ci stared straight at the face so close to him, silent. He shook his head a little slowly, then nodded.
Lin Xicai sat down next to him and said calmly, "Stretch out your arms."
Li Ci's hand holding the food box trembled, and he put the food box down under her calm gaze. He took off his loose coat, revealing a drapey black shirt underneath. He rolled up his sleeves, revealing more horrific wounds.
He himself seemed to feel ugly, and being stared at by her suddenly made him feel a little irritated and awkward. He almost subconsciously wanted to drop his sleeves to cover up the unbearable and ugly appearance, but when he saw her frown, he didn't dare to move.
Yes, isn’t this exactly what she wants to see, Li Ci thought coldly, isn’t this what this bitch wants to see him become like this? She wants to see him in pain, wants to see him miserable, she wishes to see him even more miserable.
A flash of cruelty flashed through Li Ci's mind, but in the end, he only had one thought left. Forget it, if she wants to watch, then let her watch. At least she can spend some time with him while she mocks him and laughs at his jokes.
Mocking him, even beating him or scolding him, is much better than leaving him alone.
Li Ci stiffened his arm to show the wound to everyone, feeling like a prostitute who had stripped naked in front of a client. The client was not even interested in having sex with him, but was only picky about his body, pointing at it like pork.
He has been high and mighty since birth and cannot be disobeyed. He was born in the clouds and has never taken the ants living on the ground seriously. But now, the one who trampled on his dignity was precisely this person whom he used to think of as an ant.
A servant's daughter, a lowly thing not even fit to carry his shoes.
But now, she is everything in his life, she is all he can rely on.
This bitch... He wants her dead, he... He can't live without her.
Her face was very close to him. Li Ci stared at every inch of skin on that slap-sized face. His eyes were filled with something that was not sure whether it was resentment or obsession, which thickened into a mass that was difficult to describe.
Lin Xicai stared at his arm for a moment, pursed her lips, and stood up to retrieve a medicine box from a coffee table. Inside was some unused gauze and medicine. Li Ci's eyes followed her, rising and falling with her every move.
Why was she pretending to take the medicine box? Did she care about his life or death? Did she give him medicine?
Li Ci's Adam's apple moved slightly, and he had a vague guess in his mind, but his reason immediately laughed at his fantasy. Don't be silly, Li Ci, she just wants you to die.
He stared at her until she sat back down beside him and placed the medicine box on her lap.
Then, she took out some medicated cotton swabs and gauze and actually bandaged him up.
Li Ci almost forgot to breathe, her body was physiologically tense, and somewhere in her chest was beating chaotically and rapidly with her movements.
The potion cleaned the wound, and the wound was stung by the potion, but he could not feel it. Lin Xicai seemed to be bandaging a piece of stone.
Lin Xicai's movements were very gentle. She kept her head down and looked very focused. But when she was almost done bandaging the bandage, she spoke softly while tying the knot of the bandage.
"No one else can find this place except me. If you really die here, I will make this place disappear along with your rotting corpse."
Her movements were so gentle, but he could hear the coldness in her tone; she was blaming him.
A fear of being abandoned suddenly washed over him again. His handsome face turned pale in an instant. He opened his mouth, eager to defend himself, "I didn't mean to..."
After Lin Xicai bandaged one of his arms, she went on to bandage the other. When Li Ci was so nervous that he was trembling with fear of being abandoned, each of her seemingly gentle movements seemed like a kind of probing torture.
The torture caused to him by this slow slicing went far beyond the wounds themselves.
Just when he was about to lose his temper, Lin Xicai suddenly smiled and said, "You're just too bored, right? Do you want me to stay with you more?"
Li Ci looked at her, not knowing whether she wanted him to nod or shake his head, and stood there stiffly for a moment.
He stared at her blankly, not daring to answer yes, as if that was a very presumptuous and fantastical thing to do, but his eyes were nodding, and desire was about to overflow from his eyes.
This place made him feel insecure, and the person in front of him also made him feel insecure. He didn't know whether this was just a whim of hers or another trap.
He seemed very nervous and unconsciously picked at his fingers that were already covered with wounds.
The next moment, his movements were stopped by her.
The slender, soft hand suppressed his movement with a small but irresistible force.
Her eyes swept over his wound, and she said in a disgusted, commanding tone: "I don't like bloody and dirty things."
Li Ci's Adam's apple moved slightly. He felt that those hands were extremely ugly. He hurriedly put them behind his back. Even the act of picking his fingers became shameful. "No..."
Lin Xicai seemed quite satisfied with his performance. She smiled at him once again, a rare sight, and even raised her hand to smooth his messy hair. "Behave better, and I'll come to see you more often."
She stood up, lowered her eyes to glance at him, and said the second half of the sentence, "If you don't behave well, this will be your own retirement home."
Li Ci suddenly looked up at her, "Believe me, last time... I... I won't do it again..."
Lin Xicai naturally knew what he was talking about. She gave him a cold look, turned around and disappeared from that place.
Lin Xicai looked calm at that time, but in fact, after coming out and lying on the bed in the room, she couldn't help but feel a little scared.
No matter how much she hated this person, no matter how hateful he was, no matter how little he was a paper NPC, she really didn't intend to drive him crazy or kill him.
After all, she is such a kind little girl.
So from now on, she could try to be a little nicer to him. At least, she wanted him to feel that she was being nicer to him.
…
Li Ci didn't believe this woman. He didn't believe her lies that she would accompany him more.
Because in the next few days, she still came and left quickly.
Until one day she came again, this time with a tablet in her hand.
"Today is Saturday, and I suddenly feel like watching a movie," she said. "Do you want to join us?"
Li Ci looked over and for the first time in his life felt such anticipation for an ordinary movie. Deep down in his heart, he even felt an indescribable feeling of flattery.
After a while, he nodded blankly.
While he was eating, Lin Xicai started fiddling with the movie accessories.
He didn't know what means she used, but in the blink of an eye, she had a projector in her hand, and without him seeing any network connection, the image on the tablet was projected onto the screen.
Li Ci stared blankly at everything that happened. Until now, he had no time to think about the principles and reasons behind it. He had become accustomed to her calling the shots in this place.
After Li Ci finished his meal, he cleared the table, washed the lunch boxes and put them away, then returned to the blanket in front of the sofa.
The person sat lazily on the blanket, looking relaxed. The light from the living room shone on the fair and soft face without any aggression.
Li Ci looked at her, then looked at the surrounding scene. Putting aside all the previous causes, it was so warm that it seemed as if this was just an ordinary light among thousands of lights.
His chest suddenly beat twice, and Li Ci suddenly remembered his home.
He lived in a huge house, a huge villa, and he had a whole floor to himself. But every room on that floor was empty. Whenever he went back, no matter which room he entered, it was cold and icy...
At a certain moment, a ridiculous thought even flashed through his mind. If he could freeze this moment, and if this bitch was willing to stay with him forever, it would not be impossible for him to stay in this place forever.
Li Ci sat down next to Lin Xicai. He didn't dare to get too close to her, nor did he want to be too far away from her. He carefully sat down about a foot away from her.
Lin Xicai had already downloaded the movie. He looked up at the screen, which showed the name of the movie in white letters on a black background - "The Juvenile Offenders".
There is a line of small text below the movie title: "This film is an educational film for preventing juvenile delinquency. Parents are advised to watch it with their children."
Li Ci's expression changed. "What do you mean?"
"It's nothing special, I just want to watch it." Lin Xicai had no expression on her face. She glanced at him and said to him in a reasonable manner, "If you don't want to watch it, forget it. I'll go back to my room and watch it myself."
As Lin Xicai was about to stand up, a hand grabbed the corner of her clothes.
She lowered her head and looked over. Li Ci stared at her with red eyes, "Don't leave..."
Lin Xicai pursed her lips and said calmly, "So are you going to watch it or not?"
Li Ci gritted his teeth, still afraid that she would leave, and said, "Look."
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