Chapter 16 A Narrow Escape: I wish I were a domineering CEO. ...
I ran around the corner and bumped into two generals. Seeing the black velvet cloaks on their armor, I snatched them like a robber and quickly tied them around my waist.
The general whose cloak had been taken away chuckled and said, "The lord's heroic spirit remains unchanged."
I was both anxious and angry. "Damn it."
I returned to my bedroom in a disheveled state, but the old doctor and the maid were long gone. I sank into the bathtub and cried my heart out.
She didn't leave the bath until she couldn't cry anymore.
Wrapped in a white bath towel, I sat on a soft chair and sighed deeply.
The series has shifted from a thriller to a slice-of-life story, but the difficulty of leveling up and defeating monsters hasn't decreased.
I used to be too scared to even read pornographic novels, but now I look at men's naked bodies every day.
I used to be a homebody and rarely talked to people, but now I'm forced to interact with people every day.
I used to dislike using my brain, but now I think about things every day.
I used to be a foodie, but now I'm not very interested in food.
Why aren't you interested? Because it tastes bad.
The black bread I ate at Aya's house was as hard as a rock. I thought all bread from poor families was like that, but I didn't expect the black bread in the castle to be like that too. It was rough and hard, but it was more like wood than a rock.
As for other foods, such as roasted meat and pea soup, they were also unable to swallow them.
I didn't know what kind of meat they used for the barbecue, and I didn't dare to ask. It tasted rough and tough, and I chewed for a long time without daring to swallow it. In the end, I swallowed it anyway, savoring the natural aroma of the meat—in order not to starve to death.
The pea soup had an extremely strong beany smell, almost like swill. I felt nauseous and vomited after just one sip.
If it weren't for the fruit and vegetable salad and red wine, I probably would have starved to death. The fruits and vegetables here had a natural, fresh aroma, and the cheese was perfectly seasoned, making them refreshing and smooth. The red wine was mellow and delicious, several times better than what I drink in modern times.
Besides the issue of food, there's also the issue of excretion.
Now that I'm a man, I can only pee standing up. At first, my technique was terrible, and I wet several pairs of pants and clothes, sometimes even my shoes and socks. I didn't dare tell the maid, nor did I dare wash them myself (what lord washes his own clothes?), so I could only throw all my clothes into the bath and have the bewildered maid fish them out to wash.
As for defecating, it wasn't an easy matter either. Although there were no technical problems—men and women squatted or sat—the toilets here were incredibly smelly. There was only a wooden plank inside with a hole in the middle, through which excrement and urine flowed, creating an unbearable stench.
The excrement and urine fell into the deepest cesspool, passing through a long, chimney-like cesspool that had likely never been cleaned—this cesspool was difficult to clean, and a stench wafted up every day, even the lord's private latrine was foul. The deepest cesspool connected directly to the moat, from where the flowing water carried the excrement away.
Every time I go to the toilet, I think about leaving as soon as possible.
Finally, there's the issue of sleeping with someone.
I refused to sleep with a beautiful woman last night, but what about tonight, tomorrow night, and beyond? Should I refuse every night? What if people here think I have a problem with my male function and scrutinize me under a magnifying glass?
My head is throbbing.
To be a maid is to live like a dog; to be an emperor is to still live like a dog.
Amidst a blizzard and howling winds, a large group of raggedly dressed girls stood in a long line outside the west gate of the castle.
It was still dark, the door was still closed, and they had been waiting for almost an hour, constantly breathing on their hands and rubbing them because they were so cold.
At the end of the cliffside mountain road, a small black dot appeared out of nowhere, walking unsteadily, clearly having exerted a great deal of effort to climb the mountain.
The girls in line glanced at the little black dot with disdain—she could never be their competitor.
To be a castle maid, one must be in good health, but she was out of breath even climbing a mountain, how could she do heavy work?
Being a castle maid is no easy feat for just any girl. The selection process is extremely rigorous, with screening based on physical abilities, temperament, and other factors, resulting in a selection ratio of roughly one in ten. Almost none of the selected maids are willing to leave the castle; they believe that even dying there is better than living in a village. If a maid marries a castle servant, baker, or other similar person and has children, her daughters and sons automatically qualify to work at the castle.
Under normal circumstances, the castle does not recruit new people. Most of the maids and servants are passed down from generation to generation. Fresh blood will only be added when there is a shortage of manpower.
Now, thanks to the zombies, some of the maids have died or run away, so the castle has to recruit new ones from outside.
Hearing the creaking of the gate, the girls in the long line became excited and quickly straightened their clothes and combed their hair, waiting to enter.
The two guards glanced sideways at each girl who entered, and if they saw one they didn't like, they would drag her out without giving a reason.
Several girls were dragged out in succession, their cries filling the air.
The girls who weren't pulled out secretly rejoiced that they had listened to the advice of those in the know before coming, and brought some money or valuables to give to the guards, which allowed them to enter the fort smoothly.
Soon it was the last girl's turn, the same little black dot that had struggled to climb the mountain earlier.
She was clearly frozen stiff, shivering all over, her teeth chattering, and she couldn't even say her name.
The two guards waited for a while, but when she didn't offer her "tribute," they rudely tried to push her out.
Her eyes blazed with fury as she struggled desperately, her face turning a deep purple-red.
Enraged, the two guards slapped him several times.
"He's got a death wish."
"Throw this bitch down there."
They lifted her up horizontally as she struggled, and strode to the edge of the cliff, while the girls watching screamed in terror.
The two guards, assuming she was just a naive woman, were about to throw her down when—a low growl came from behind one of the guards—and a blood-soaked zombie pounced, snapping his neck. The other guard, terrified, was tackled to the ground by two zombies, letting out a horrified and desperate scream.
The woman, who had been lifted high by two guards, was slammed to the ground. Three or four zombies attacked her, and everyone thought she was going to die. They cried out in alarm, but she burst out from between the zombies' legs and nimbly slipped through the gaps between them to escape the encirclement.
The zombies were enraged and lunged at her again, baring their fangs and claws, but she rushed toward the castle's west gate, which was about to close, at an extremely fast speed.
Just as the zombies were about to catch up with her, she slipped through the crack in the door like a fish, and skillfully kicked the door hard, causing the heavy wooden bolt to snap down and lock the door securely.
Everyone was stunned, including several guards who were frantically trying to close the door—they were initially in a panic and couldn't seem to get the bolts on properly, but the girl had solved the problem so deftly.
The zombies roared angrily and pounded on the city gate, but to no avail.
At the same time, the screams of a girl who hadn't had time to escape could be heard outside the door.
The courtyard inside the west gate was deathly silent, except for the heavy breathing.
Half an hour later, the maid assessment officially began, but one person was exempted from the test and became a maid directly—the little black dot who slammed the door shut. Her outstanding adaptability won over the supervisors, and she passed the assessment directly.
***
Inside the warm and cozy imperial study, a young general was giving a report:
"My lord, you were severely injured in the bombing that night and remained unconscious for several days and nights. The physicians were helpless. Just as the other generals and I decided to seek help from outside, we suddenly discovered that some of the guards had turned into zombies and were attacking the maids and guards of the castle. We immediately gathered our forces to counterattack, but we did not expect the zombies to be so terrifying. The guards who were bitten also turned into zombies."
I sat on a soft chair in the Imperial Study, listening to the young general kneeling on the ground as he spoke, while secretly taking notes—of course, only a few keywords.
To survive in the castle, one must first fulfill the duties of a lord, such as dealing with zombies.
I'm a timid kid; I usually scream when I see a cockroach. Now I have to deal with zombies... I'm overwhelmed.
After the morning council meeting, I summoned the young general who had questioned me and asked him to tell me the whole story of the zombies. I told him that I was seriously injured and unconscious at the time, and I was not very clear about many things.
I called him over just because he's young; a cunning old man would see something in me.
"In just one night, we lost more than half of our guards, and some maids and guards also turned into zombies. In desperation, we had no choice but to open the southeast side door and let some maids, guards and other personnel leave in an emergency. Everything went according to plan, and we did not escape overnight as rumored."
The young general's tone turned somber. "Zombies are afraid of fire. We planned to set the entire castle ablaze and burn ourselves and all the zombies alive. But then there were too many zombies, and our men were torn apart and killed by the horde before they could even light the fire. The entire team was scattered."
I was startled and asked, "Where do all these zombies come from?"
The young general's gaze lingered on my face for two seconds before he said, "Nobody knows where they came from; they suddenly appeared overnight."
"How is this possible?" I exclaimed. "Didn't you check?"
The young general lowered his head, his tone becoming even heavier, "I apologize for my incompetence; I have not been able to find out yet."
"Where did the zombies first appear?" I asked again. Tracing back to the source is the most basic investigative method.
"I don't know."
“The castle is so big, there must be someone who can provide clues. By questioning everyone one by one, we can find some clues.”
"yes."
After the young general left, I leaned back in my high-backed chair and let out a heavy sigh. I tried my best to portray myself as a decisive and intelligent lord, afraid of giving myself away.
Perhaps it's because I read too many domineering CEO novels in the past, but I always recall the descriptions of CEOs and even imitate them in front of the mirror—
His gaze remained completely unwavering.
"A chilling coldness emanated from his entire body."
A cold smile appeared on his thin lips.
A note from the author:
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A huge thank you to "23200669" for the shallow water explosive I-1 bomb! This is the first I-1 bomb I I've ever received! Thank you so much!
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